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Madrigalskylark
Obsessive LiveJournal user madrigalskylark is known for his attention whore antics, leaving phony suicide notes, passive-aggressive bitchiness, and use of the victim role to earn sympathy from naive, unsuspecting morons. Or gluttons for punishment, depending on how you look at it.
Batshit Crazy
As a testament to the sad reality that he has no life or friends, madrigalskylark has created a LiveJournal account for each of his personalities. Unfortunately for him, his total number of known accounts far exceeds the amount of times he will engage in buttsecks. Far and wide, faggots rejoiced when they realized he couldn't tear himself away from a computer long enough to cruise for cum.
List of known accounts, often used to circumvent community bans, harass other users, or generally troll where he's unwelcome:
- madrigalskylark
- madrigal
- fallenskylark
- chapinhuskiey
- summerhusky
- Matthewkeys
- uglystupid
- sunriseagain
- angelofadia
- greyfadedrain
- deliriousecho
- dummy01
- radioMatthew
He has maintained a status on Blogspot, Xanga (defunct), and One Opinion, creeping out a whole new group of bloggers!
He also intrudes on the lives of others via several social networking sites, such as Last.fm, Twitter, and Flickr.
Despite being banned, madrigalskylark has a tendency to pop up in both gsa_lj and new_gay_boys to cause drama. In the case of the former, it is largely done to provoke iconoclast and tko_ak, who he has threatened to expose and bring down after being defriended. More recently, he threatened legal action against tko_ak and "several members" of new_gay_boys (see screen capture below):
- I have many, many grounds for building up a legal case. I know your full name, I know where you live. It wouldn't be hard for me to bring one against you...
And what would any attention whore be without their own MySpace page? As madrigalskylark is no excepton, he creeps the fuck out of everyone in his extended network. Matthewkeys, MySpace edition!
LJ Abuse, in their usual ass-hattery, temporarily banned several LiveJournal users (and new_gay_boys members) after a violation of "federal law." The action was taken after madrigalskylark notified them of a "copyright infringement" when they altered "photographs" of his in one of his phony "news" releases (see image above). Because the internets are a serious business!
Alice 97.3 FM Controversy
KLLC (Alice 97.3 FM), a San Francisco radio station, is at near shrine status in the pathetic world of madrigalskylark, as demonstrated so profoundly on any page he has the ability to edit. Not wanting to be associated with such psychosis, KLLC flatly denies that he has any affiliation with them:
- Thanks for your note. It's alarming to hear this. However, we have no employee of this name [Matthew Keys] working for Alice. Apparently, he's a listener, who frequently calls the station and tries to associate himself with us. But he has no affiliation with KLLC. I understand he has a MySpace account that is pretty much devoted to the station, but again- it's a private account, with no station association or involvement...
Unsatisfied, madrigalskylark purchased the Alice 97.3 domain name from under the nose of the station he so longs to be associated with, despite their protests:
- The station manager at KLLC basically feels as if his hands are tied when it comes to the e-mail address I use. They don't own a copyright on "Alice973FM" and the domain was up for grabs, so I took it. Alice's station manager and I have talked back and forth through e-mails and he is retaining any and all records of both mine and Blaire's conversation should legal matters arise...
-madrigalskylark File:Email.jpg
Standard Operating Procedures
Once you've been friended by madrigalskylark, it's important not to panic. Eventually, you'll see his pathetic creepiness manifest itself. You're bound to see song lyrics, the occassional suicide threat (and getting mad at someone for trying to stop him), rambling rants about shit no one cares about, and "news" releases.
If you're not mind-numbingly bored with madrigalskylark yet, wait until he begins to comment in your journal, obviously thinking you're best friends. First, he'll start talking to your friends, making deprecating comments about himself in an effort to get others to say "oh noes your not11!1!" Then, he'll make an immature joke to try and impress people with his wit. Once this doesn't work, he'll try to endear himself through bribery. Once he wants to meet, he'll play a power game for attention. You know things are getting weird when he starts to "defend" you against sarcastic advances.
Finally, once you cut him, he'll try to do anything to return to your good graces. When that doesn't work, he'll begin to talk with random people about how someone doesn't like him because they defriended him.
As the drama drags on, he'll leave passive-aggressive comments in your journal and those of your friends, deleting them if you engage him. A conversation will carry on, but many of his comments will disappear before you can respond to them. Like the nugget that just will not go down the toilet when it's flushed, madrigalskylark refuses to disappear from your life, randomly popping up as the perpetual ad for abortion.
Miscellaneous Creepiness
When he isn't stalking teenage boys online, talking on the phone (long distance) to his 15 year old internet boyfriend(s), obsessing over his sadly extensive and self-created Wikipedia page, making idle threats, releasing bullshit news releases, paying homage to his shrine of Matthew Shepard, creating new journals, or listening to the same damn radio station (and telling everyone about it), or updating the "Skylark Network" madrigalskylark supposedly attends classes at his local clown community college. His seemingly favorite past time involves leaving passive-aggressive, bitchy remarks in various journals and communities and deleting them before anyone can respond to them.
Wikipedia Page
Matthew thinks that other people care about him, so he created a Wikipedia page for himself. He talks about where he was born, reasons he broke up with his boyfriends, and how he invented social networking. Be sure to catch the part that surely everyone cares about: the date his LiveJournal paid account expired!
Matthew Keys, The Bizarre but True DavisWiki Story
Matthew Keys thinks everyone needs to know his life story. He spends hours every day maintaining his vanity page on Daviswiki, despite the fact that he's never been to Davis.
He claims to have originated on Wikipedia, then discovered Daviswiki and afflicted it like a terrible terrible plague. E-detectives have done a quick investigation of Wikipedia, however, and found either he was never there, or they have wisely expunged all evidence of him. He "went nuts" in January 2006 (which isn't to be confused with the time he "went crazy" in February 2006) and left Daviswiki to friendwhore on MySpace. Unfortunately, it would only be a month before he would declare himself cured and totally badass and return to Daviswiki.
He frequently deletes his userpage in protest of people not worshipping his dramawhoring ways, and remains oblivious to the fact that everyone would rather have him just staying deleted. He also hates April Fools Day with a passion he usually reserves for young boys.
On April 10th 2006 he became the first user ever banned from Daviswiki, after a particularly pitiful effort to whore himself over the entire wiki.
IRL he claims to be from Vacaville, which translates from some-language-no-one-speaks to "cow town." He currently resides in the Natomas community of Sacramento, CA.
Some theorize that he was spawned by SaulSugerman breeding with a retard.
As of April 2007, he has come back to the Davis Wiki and other related wikis, this time with new and exciting troll accounts. Calling himself by new sockpuppets such as "evilmaxheadroom", he has decided to replicate the great and lulz-worthy Max Headroom Pirate television incident by running a bot to replace pages with quotes from that broadcast. He shows all of the originality of your typical skript kiddie, but hey it's probably not his fault because he's too busy contemplating suicide.
Quotes
- "I'm not someone to be messed with anymore, and anyone f...ing with me will see they get f...ed back. Trust me, I can hold my own now. I've got that kind of attitude now"
In summary, for serious lulz, check out his page.
He descends into new depths of emo on this edit.
At one point, the good citizenry of Davis Wiki decided to ban him for making incredibly pointless edits, but the admin was too nice to ban him for forever and only kicked him off for 48 hours. Kbop took to using the DavisWikiGnome in order to quench his addiction to wikis.
Update!
As of July 31st, a sockpuppet of madrigalskylark posted commentary on the duomaxwell1903 drama in new_gay_boys which included something of an apology, and was promptly re-banned and baleted his sockpuppet.
Matthew filed a wrongful death suit in Lake Nowhere superiour court on November 7th, 2006.
Artistic Interpretations of madrigalskylark
madrigalskylark is such a strange figure, and has had such a profoundly negative impact on so many lives, that many Interweb users have felt inspired to create artwork which captures the essence of madrigalskylark. Below are several such pieces, recovered from a secret Interweb archive:
Madrigalskylark is part of a series on people who have slept with Rubberduc |
Nomadlisa • Rob Levin • Andrewpants • San Francisco • Girlvinyl JWZ • Hepkitten • Bradfitz • Weev • Sloth • Ghettofinger • Battlecry |
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