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Crossfire

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This article is about the online game Crossfire. For the gay chat app, see xfire.

Crossfire is an online free-to-play massive shooter game made in some Vietnamese homebrew shack made by incapable 16-year-old for noob 16-year-olds. The framerates are ridiculously low and CS Source and graphics are on par with the latest in computer gaming, Counter-Strike 1.6!

Noobs Everywhere

In Crossfire, practically all players are either noobs, fair play noobs (so-called forumers), children or girl gamers posting on the forums in all pink and internet retarded Brazilians. There are many reasons for becoming noob in this game. Excerpt of possible reasons for being noob:

  • lucker
  • sprayer
  • croucher
  • bullet-dodger
  • backside-killer
  • lowpinger
  • highpinger
  • lagger
  • hacker
  • waller
  • chammer
  • aimbotter
  • wallhacker
  • reloadkill
  • textkill
  • lolkill
  • typing
  • afk
  • phonekill
  • toiletkill
  • food
  • eating
  • omg-headshot
  • rifler-in-sniper-match
  • scar-light-noob
  • kriss-noob
  • ak-noob
  • m12-noob
  • m60-noob
  • awm-noob
  • dragunov-noob
  • pistol-noob
  • grenade-noob
  • smoke-noob
  • flash-noob
  • newbie
  • noob
  • nub
  • nab
  • ahole
  • generic-fck-you-all

All of these things can make you NOOB. So .. don't forget to liberally spread these words in spam fashion in the game rooms especially..... ESPECIALLY in a game room full of Brazilians

Fair Play

Playing fair in the game is like you taking a purple shit that smells like flowers. So this is how you can help to play fair with those shitty laggy ass Brazilians and fast ass Asians.

1. Make a new account at the website.

2. Download the client (may take from a couple of minutes or two days with walmart internet)

3. Go to MPGH.NET and download the latest HACKS!!!!!

4. update the game (3 hours later)

5. start your fuckin hacks.

6. start the game client.

7. look at the daily missions (do Search and Destroy as these games end quickly)

8. start hackin

9. ????

10. PROFIT

11. IF BANNED do steps 1 and 8.

Nice Things to Know

  • The forums are moderated by a mutant noob guy named Saladin.
  • Don't forget to look SPOPs and STAR characters under their hood for a big bonar, err, bonuses.
  • Don't forget to join a clan with an offensive name, like III Reich or similar.
  • You can circument the - again, CHEAP - swear words filter by putting dots into your beloved word.
  • Don't forget to call people "hack", "kick" or "reported" when they make double kills or, even worse, TRIPLE kills.
  • You can bind spam messages onto the F5, F6, F7 and F8 keys under Options, tab "Community". Ironic, isn't it?

Offensive Words

  • kick XY
  • hack, hek, hak, haker
  • XY reported
  • XY gay farmer noob
  • learn to play
  • use a real gun
  • off that noob gun
  • lets get on 1v1 ESL, you up to it noob?

Weblinks

Crossfire homepage


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