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Crossfire
This article is about the online game Crossfire, and will mostly focus on the NA/UK Egyptian version run by Z8Games. For the gay chat app, see xfire.
For the vastly superior board game see Crossfire (board game)
Crossfire is an online free-to-play first-person shooter made in some Korean home-brew shack by incapable 16-year-old's. The framerates are ridiculously low and CS Source and graphics are on par with the latest in computer gaming, Counter-Strike 1.6! Since it is free anyone can play it because half of the world is too poor to actually buy a decent game. The game itself is over run by Brazilians and Arabs that have shitty attitudes, computers, internet connections, and hacks.
The Players
Americans
Not the most common players around, as the version name, Crossfire North America, suggests. Americans who play this game generally complain and/or trash talk constantly in the chat and have massive egos (Especially if competitive). Crossfire is actually not very popular with Americans, as most are smart enough to realize Crossfire is a poor-mans FPS and they can do better elsewhere.
Canadians
Similar to the Americans, but with the complete lack of the ability to communicate in English without sounding like a blindfolded monkey using a keyboard to wipe it's ass. All the Canadian-only clans are full of "Wannabe" players and they suck as a whole.
Azns
As with every other game they play, Asians must strive to be the best. In Crossfire's case, that means dumping $1000's of dollars into the game and then proceed to win/purchase all the most overpowered and cheap weapons and items. They verge on being the most annoying players in the game, with their rage-inducing overpowered weapons raping everything that moves, typing Vietnamese in the chat (Which resembles somebody slamming their face into the keyboard and hitting "Enter"), and being pricks in general. The majority of Asian clans that clan war like to include 1 player who toggles hacks on their team, in a poor attempt at trying to hide the fact that they can't win otherwise. When called out on it, the entire clan will be quick to call you and your clan "QQers". FACT: They generally are not very good when you take away their M4 IB's and armor.
Brazilians (And our other South American Friends Babacas!)
They infest every MMO in existance, and CF is not free of their stench.
The average BR has little to no game sense, a crap laptop from 2004 with 500 MB of RAM, poor internet connection, and will hackusate anyone better than him. Most don't speak English, but whoa to person who finds the ever elusive BR who can speak just enough English to say "Fuck You".
It is not an uncommon sight to see a BR asking to trade accounts in public chat, because, you know, everybody is just dying to have an SFC account with a 0.60 KDR and 5 guns.
This is a given, but BRs are notorious for hacking. This is however, somewhat of a stereotype as the real kings of hacking are the Egyptians and other Arabs. Still, hacking BRs are not terribly uncommon. Ironically, there is very little middle ground with BRs: If they aren't hacking, they will be accusing somebody else of hacking, and this usually means you. Most of them think that if they say "kika hak porra lixo" enough somebody will eventually put you up for a well-deserved kick vote, but do not fear as kick-voting almost never works anyways. They don't realize that even if they have better aim and game sense (Which is never), they are still at a major disadvantage to US and CAN players because there is a difference between 20 and 200 ping.
Smilegate, after seeing that the South Americans had such an undying love for their poorly programmed game, licensed and created a specific version just for them: CF Brazil! It was thought that now the Brazilians could play in harmony with each other, but to this very day BRs are still rather common in CF NA. It is unknown if this is because they hate Americans, are too lazy to make a new account, or are just plain stupid. It is speculated to be a combination of all three.
The BR population has dropped immensely due to the introduction of a couple of South American based versions of the game and their place has been taken by Turks and Egys, so in reality the playerbase in CFNA is actually worse off now. GG no re.
Mexicans
JAJAJAJA AMERICA GRINGOS MINI PING
British
CF NA also has a very popular slowly dying UK based server. There is already a far more popular Eurotrash version of Crossfire, but for some reason it was felt necessary to create a UK based server. This would be understandable, as most of Europe doesn't want anything to do with the tea and crumpet whoring British, but Smilegate are obviously not the brightest knife in the drawer and decided it would be best to place the server location in GERMANY.
The UK players are similar to their Americunt counterparts, with huge E-gos and Narcissistic personality disorder. The majority of minimodding forumers are British.
Egy's, Turks, and other Arabs
Arabs are the cancer that is slowly killing Crossfire. They play in both US and UK based servers.
This is how to easily identify an Arab in game:
- Username has one or more of the following in it: ahmed, ahmad, mohammad, mohemmed, zezo, pop, hema, mido, medo, hamas, egy, khaled, mohmed, a7a, etc.
- Will have awfulbad ping in US servers, usually around 170-250, and in many cases 300+. It is harder to identify them in UK servers as some actually have decent pings.
- Do not have a rank higher than 2nd LT.
- Have the inability to frag unless hacking
- Type gibberish or lulzy broken English in the chat box
- Do not know how to vote kick
- Will constantly message you and ask to trade accounts
- Will attempt to pick up any weapon that looks special after it is dropped. They don't understand that you don't have to freeze and actually be looking at the gun when attempting to switch it with their own. This can create some potentially lulzy situations whereas you can drop your gun (Assuming it's something that requires more than just GP to acquire) and use it as bait. For more information on how to accomplish this, see the "How to troll" section of this article.
The highest concentration of hackers come from the Middle East, as most of them are so bad at the game, it's the only way they can play. Many Egyptians are supportive of their fellow countrymen, even if they are hacking blatantly. If you try to kick the hax0r, they will respond by kicking you in return and the vote will go through. The hacking situation has gotten to a point where many are demanding that Z8Games IP ban all of Egypt and Turkey, but teh Jewz at Z8 know that a large part of their server population comes from their Arabian friends and will never do such a thing!
It is reputed that internet cafes in Egypt install the latest Crossfire hacks and advertise them as a "Perk". Pay a little extra money, get a hack, and ruin what little fun the game has in it for everyone else.
Last Thursday, a mob of these angry towel-heads took to the forums to report an absolutely insulting atrocity. As it turned out, in a hardly noticeable corner of a newly released Wave Mode map, there was a picture of several Koran pages strewn across the ground in the texture. This was an absolutely insulting and degrading inclusion, so they did what any respectable person would do and went on a cranked to 11 spam assault, making thread after thread in every subforum they could find, demanding that Z8 go in and remove the "Offensive" material. Often, these threads would threaten a massive boycott by the Egyptians, many crying about leaving permanently. The rest of the community raised their hands in a unanimous rejoice as they had believed to have found Muslims' greatest weakness, and that all the hack issues were going to be resolved! Unfortunately, the Allah fueled fire under Z8's fat ass became too hot to bear, and they decided to waste everyone else's time and patch the game to remove the terrible imagery. Everything went back to normal, and the Muslims were were in a gorgeous, uplifted mood knowing that they could now hack without being under the oppression of a few dirty book pages on the ground in the texture pack of a third-rate F2P videogame.
Farmers
There is a rather large community of farmers in Crossfire. These jobless skanks use their parents credit-cards to purchase 4 VIP weapons for bonus EXP (Roughly $500) and proceed to make farming rooms in Ghetto servers nobody plays in (Like Delta and Foxtrot). They spend hours upon hours shooting sock puppet accounts AKA "Cows" or simply filling up "Grenade farming" rooms with their other farmer buddies and commit grenade suicide for days. Because the EXP system is time based, not score based, they still get massive amounts of EXP even if they don't make a single kill. There used to be 3rd party faggotry programs that would allow for faster level ups with little to no effort, but they were made a bannable offense. FACT: Farmers can be from any faction listed above, but the majority are azn. Go figure.
So what's in it for the farmers? Quicker level up so as to unlock difficult to achieve items? Special maps/modes unlocked at a certain rank? NOAP! Their reward: A tiny little 20X20 pixel icon next to their username. WOW THAT'S AWESOME!!!1111 There is literally no other motivation, as any form of rewards/unlocks stop after SFC. Welcome to the sad world that is Crossfire.
Recently, the vast majority of the highest ranking farmers, who worked hard for their little ego-boosting-but-meaningless Marshall rank, were b& for for bot farming faggotry, some permanently due to prior hacking. This evoked a lot of lulz, especially on the CFNA Facebook page where these pitiful nobodies tried to go internet tough guy and demand that they be acquitted of this utterly uncalled for and loathsome behavior from Z8. Watch out, my father is a lawer!
—Oliver Stojkovski (AKA -i[S]uper.?), bot farming manchild. G4Box's devs are shaking in their boots after reading this threat, no doubt. |
Nice Things to Know
- The forums are moderated by a fat balding ginger.
- GP (Game Points) and ZP (Z8 Points) are the 2 main currencies. GP is free but takes forever to save up to buy a gun, and ZP costs IRL monies.
- Don't forget to join a clan with an offensive name, like all Brazilian clans to date.
- You can circumvent the - again, CHEAP - swear words filter by putting dots into your beloved word.
- Don't forget to call people "hak", "kick" or "reported" when they make double kills or, even worse, TRIPLE kills.
- You can bind spam messages onto the F5, F6, F7 and F8 keys under Options, tab "Community". Ironic, isn't it?
- Everyone speaks Brazilian or Turkish, except in Alpha 7 where everyone speaks Vietnamese.
- All the gun are over priced AS FUCK!
- Every game mode is ass with a capital A
- Graphics are comparable to CounterSrike1.6 on low and medium. Whereas High is more "Condition Zero", that awkward game between CS1.6 and CS:S
- Most players are about 12 to 15 (giggity), but pretend to be much older and have unrealistic background stories relatable to most Anime's
HACKERSLEGITIMATE NOOBS ARE EVERY WHERE, SO JOIN THE MOVEMENT!!!- There are always useless gun updates that add weapons that 95% of the community thinks are shitty
- The kick-vote system is a joke, with even majority votes of 9-6 being "Denied"
Noobs Everywhere
There are many reasons for being noob in this game. Excerpt of possible reasons for being noob:
- lucker
- sprayer
- croucher
- minipinger
- highpinger
- lagger
- hacker
- waller
- chammer
- aimbotter
- wallhacker
- textkill/typekill
- afk
- phonekill
- toiletkill
- eatingkill
- armor fag
- spop noob
- female character user
- only headshot noob
- scar-light-noob
- kriss-noob
- AK sprayer-noob
- m12-noob
- m60-noob
- awm-noob
- M14-noob
- KSG/M1216/Jackhammer/AA-12-noob
- grenade-noob
- smoke-noob
- flash-noob
- VIP noob
- newbie
- noob
- nub
- nab
- nob
- "Noop", the Brazilian term for noob since they apparently don't have the B-key on their keyboards
- ahole
- generic-fck-you-all
All of these things can make you NOOB. So... Don't forget to liberally spread these words in spam fashion, especially in the game rooms!
The Black market and special guns
This is a cheap lottery like system where you buy a "Crate" and "Spin" a wheel to get 3 random items; kind of like "Wheel of Fortune", only with shitty, worthless items 90% of the time. In each crate, there is a possibility of getting 1, possibly 2 (Depending on the crate) rare guns permanently added to your account, however the probability of actually getting one of these guns is about 99.75 to 0.25, with the vast majority of other items being garbage timed guns, namecards, and sprays. 80% of the guns are simply reskins of other guns you can get for free in the item shop, albeit they have useless additions such as "+5" bullets per mag, yet people still go mad over buying and spinning crates, many investing 100's of dollars at a time just to get a red colored AWM or a blue colored P90. Smilegate, the game developers, also had the clever idea of letting players see 2 slots over on each side of the 3 items that you won, and will often put the "Rare" gun that you want to win in one of the slots as a tease. You were never actually "Close" to winning the gun, it's just there for the lulz.
You may find some Youtube videos that supposedly exploit an easy way to win a gun, but all of them are either lying asshats or the videos are years old and the bugs have been patched.
There are 2 other ways to earn rare guns; BP and Coupons. BP is basically Z8 saying "Hey, I know you aren't going to win anything spinning crates, so here, have some condolences". For every 10,000 ZP you purchase, you get 1000 BP. BP can be used to get some timed shit or, if you save up enough, an actually decent permanent gun. Coupons are another form of condolence. You get these out of spinning crates, mostly in ZP crates, but if you're lucky you might get one in a GP crate. Just like with BP though, you have to say save up a shit ton of coupons or order to get something that isn't timed bullshit. For all the people who saved up for 80 coupons and purchased an SL8 instead of a DE gold or an M4A1-C: You're a fucking idiot.
Weapons
/\/\SMGs/\/\
Uzi
- The cheapest weapon in the game that isn't a pistol or a 'nade. Also the weakest SMG in the entire game, only good for trolling BR noobs in Alaska EM.
Dual Uzi
- Most badass gun in the game. Only used by Jew ZP whores.
K1A
- One of the only decent SMGs that doesn't cost you any of your Jew gold or require that you waste all your time on crates (The other being the M12S). Only used by trolls who wait for your noob ass to reload and then rush and spray you.
P90/P90 Camo
- The perfect SMG for those who can't aim for shit. It carries 50 bullets (60 for the camo) that do roughly the same damage as a staple gun and has one of the worst recoil patterns ever. Also takes about 10 fucking minutes to reload.
MP5/MP5 ADV
- Your basic SMG. The ADV is perfect for trolling "Pros".
MP7
- More expensive then the MP5 and worse in every way possible. Recoil goes berserk after the first 3 bullets. Used by absolutely nobody.
M12s
- The ultimate trolling gun. Using it will get you kicked out of rooms full of crying 12 year olds who can't handle it's power. Has no recoil, so spray away! Protip: Enter an Echo 8 server room with this gun for ultimate lulz. Used by every BR in the game.
Micro Galil/Galil Scope
- Shitty SMG with a shit fire rate. 99% of all bronze, silver, and gold crates you get out of Zombie Mode contain a Micro Galil Scope.
Thompson
- Hold down the fire button for instant PRO status. Only available in the Black Market.
Kriss Super-V
- M12s for Jews.
PP-19 Bizon
- See Kriss Super-V
/\/\Rifles/\/\
M16
- The rifle you get as a starter for your new account. In other words, terrible.
M16A2
- Spend $25 and get a gun that is worse than the M4A1! Sounds like a great deal, amirite?
M4A1/M4A1 Silver/M4A1 Custom/M4A1 Patriot/etc.
- The "Standard" rifle in the game. Used by everyone. The M4 Gold is the worst of them all, but coincidentally it will end up costing you at least $100 to get enough coupons for the damn thing. That is, of course, if you're stupid enough to get it in the first place. The M4A1 Patriot
is the most overpowered M4 variant in the game and used by all ZP whoresNOT ANYMORE. IRON BEAST IS YOUR GOD NOW.
AK-47/AK Scope/AK Silver/AK Gold/etc.
- Has ridiculously good accuracy and power. Used by "Pros" and noobs who spray and get lucky headshots.
K2
- Pretty much the same thing as the M4 but with a terrible reload animation. Also the cheapest rifle in the game next to the AK-74.
AK-74
- Hey, want an AK-47 derivative with less power and accuracy? I didn't think so.
QBZ-95/QBZ-95 Camo
- Great rifle that nobody ever uses. Perfect for rushing and spraying because it doesn't lose much accuracy while doing so.
G36K
- Another great rifle nobody ever uses. Has a badass scope.
SG552
- Looks and sounds like a cheap airsoft gun from Wal-Mart. The zoom scope loses all accuracy after 2 shots.
XM8/XM8 ADV
- An overpriced as fuck rifle with a scope that has 144P resolution, so you'll be sure to miss all your shots!
Tar21
- Islamic Rifle with a terrible recoil pattern. Also has a completely useless zoom scope.
AUG A1/AUG A1-C/AUG RD
- Would be a decent gun if the reload time didn't take 5 minutes.
Scar LIGHT/Scar LIGHT LM/Scar LIGHT RD/ Scar LIGHT gold (Scrub Light)
- Noobiest rifle in the game. Using this gun will cause "Pros" and oldfags to lose their shit. Banned from tournies (This game actually has tournies, surprising, right?) for being too good, just like the M12s. Often seen used by pretentious AZN noobs with a false sense of godliness, and You.
Scar HEAVY/Scar HEAVY camo
- Heavier and less accurate than the Scar LIGHT, thus used by nobody. Z8 thought it would be funny to make the Scar HEAVY camo cost roughly $85.
Tantal Wz.88
- Same thing as the Scar LIGHT except it's recoil goes apeshit after 5 shots.
G11
- A Zombie-Mode only exclusive. Looks like a staple gun. Belongs to the "Hold down the fire button for PRO status" family of guns.
Winchester/Winchester Scope
- The fire rate is shit (Semi-auto), the accuracy is shit, the reload speed is BULLSHIT, the power is shit, this gun is shit
M14 EBR/M14 EBR Xmas/ M14 EBR ultimate (Jew) gold
- OP as all hell rifle only owned by ZP whores and a select few BRs who got lucky on Xmas crates. Only available in the Nigger Market.
Berreta AR-70/Beretta AR-70 RD
- Basically an AK reskin only available in the black market.
Type89
- This gun wins the award for shittiest looking weapon. It is quiet enough that it won't get you kicked out of a ghost mode room for hurting the poor players ears, and has full wallbang (100% damage through walls).
M-700
Dragonov
- Misses almost half the shots because of crap accuracy. Has a tendency to not 1 hit kill like almost every other sniper rifle in the game.
AWM/AWM gold/AWM RD/AWM Camo/AWM LM/etc.
- The sniper rifle that everyone uses.
SL8
- Semi-auto sniper rifle that will get you assraped by AWM and DSR users.
PSG-1/PSG-1 RD
- See above.
MGS90
- See SL8
DSR-1/DSR-1 Rusty/DSR-1 DC
- The most overpriced GP gun in the game. It is similar to the AWM except that it costs way more, has only 1 zoom, and can stay zoomed in on the target after being fired. Big fucking whoop.
R93T2
- Has the light weight of an M700, but the power of an AWM. Every Chinks favorite sniper.
Barrett
- In certain versions, such as CF China, this sniper effectively ruined Hero Mode because it deals out roughly 9000 damage per hit. When it was introduced into CF NA, Z8games, in one of the only correct courses of action ever taken by them, nerfed the gun to deal about the same damage to mutants as an AWM. This made all the ZP whores cry out in rage, because they realized that Z8 wasn't allowing them to ruin the game even more. The sniper is pretty much an AWM reskin that weighs about as much as a potato sack filled with lead. It deals out 100 damage anywhere, but it doesn't matter because you'll be dead before you can even fire the thing because of the weight.
MSR
- In an attempt to copy COD, this sniper is equipped with a "Zoom-in" scope (instead of insta-zooming like every other sniper in the game, the MSR zooms in slower in a failure of an attempt to seem more realistic). This is a disadvantage to anyone other than hardscoping noobs, and is thus used by nobody.
/\/\Shotguns/\/\
XM1040/XM1040-A
- Has no accuracy past 10 feet. Only good for rushing and spraying BR noobs in Egypt TD.
Spas-12
- Bullshit shotty that does roughly the same damage as a super-soaker.
KSG-15
- One of the only shotguns worth owning. It is the ultimate noob destroyer and 1 hit KOs everyone except ZP whores with armor.
M1216
- See above
Jackhammer
- See KSG
AA-12
- This just in: Z8Games thought it would be funny to add the most overpowered shotgun ever to Crossfire NA's ever growing list of pay-to-win weapons. 20 rounds per mag, no recoil, weighs about 5 ounces, and has a firerate faster than probably necessary. Shotgun only mode participants: Prepare your anus.
/\/\Machine Guns/\/\
M60
- You instantly become Rambo with this gun. Used by noobs and by unlucky players who get stuck with it in Crossroads EM.
RPK
- SPRRRAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Colt M16A3
- Yet another gun with an absolutely worthless scope. Seriously, there are only a select few guns in the game where the scope is actually beneficial, and most of them are snipers!
MG3/MG3 gold/MG3 LM/MG3 LD
- Perfect for pissing of Ghost Mode faggots by spraying endlessly, simultaneously killing all the ghosts but also disrupting your own GR teammates by drowning out all the sound in the game with your gun fire.
M249 MINIMI/M249 MINIMI Xmas/M249 MINIMI gold
- See MG3
Gatling Gun
- Also good for making GM faggots rage. Takes 3 hours to warm up before it can shoot.
/\/\Pistols/\/\
M9
- Cheapest gun in the game, and not surprisingly, the weakest pistol you can buy.
Colt1911
- Only slightly more powerful then the M9. Completely useless.
P228/P228 Camo
- Only slightly more powerful then the Colt. Detecting a pattern here?
Mk23 S.
- The only decent pistol with a large mag that you don't have to fork over the cash for.
Desert Eagle/Desert Eagle camo/Desert Eagle scope/Desert Eagle gold/etc.
- This is the only pistol that anyone ever uses. srsly
Anaconda/Anaconda ADV/Anaconda RD
- Western style revolver that is inferior to the DE and sounds like shit.
MATEBA
- Another revolver.
M66/M66 LD
- Another revolver.
Ruger Bisley
- Another fucking revolver. This one is the worst of them all, and you can only get it for 90 days in exchange for a assload of coupons ($$$)
USP
- This garbage pistol is only available to those who waste their time liking Z8Game$ Facebook page.
Dual Desperado
- Mini-shotguns that cost way to much for all that they do. If you're in a long range battle with any other pistol, you're fucked. If you and your opponent draw your pistols up at the same time, you're fucked. If you run out of shots and need to reload, you're fucked because it takes 4 squidzillion years to reload.
Mauser M1896/Mauser M1896 Halloween/Mauser M1896 RD
- Ultimate pwning pistol. Has a surprisingly effective triple-fire option. Only owned by Jews, ZP Whores, and pretentious Asians.
Glock-18/Glock 18 Xmas
- Basically a P228 with a triple-fire burst option, only it costs more than twice as much. The triple fire option, unlike the Mauser, sucks horse balls.
Melees
- See Below
Z8Games
Z8Games bought out the original owners of crossfire at some point in history nobody gives a shit about. Z8Games then decided it was time to introduce an asston of ingame items to improve the performance of the Ghosts in ghost mode, all of which are 1-hit weapons that cost IRL money for those people who cant aim for longer then the first try. Some of these weapons include (in relative order of date added):
Combat Axe, Combat Axe Xmas, Combat Axe Royal Dragon,Combat Axe Rose, etc.
- The most overpowered melee in the game, but nobody ever complains about it because it's "The first special melee added" (Typical Crossfire player logic). The left click slash is incredibly fast and is so easy to 1-hit head shot with that even the Egyptian noobs can handle it.
Kriss, Kriss Xmas
- The first melee introduced in the game and winnable in any Zombie Mode crate. Because Turks and Egyptians are so extraordinarily bad at every other mode, they resort to playing ZM and end up getting 7-day timed versions of this melee all the time. They then proceed to troll the fuck out of knife-only rooms and sniper-only TD rooms by abusing the "Hold down the left mouse button" and slash raping everybody. By using this melee and abusing the slash, you will have the chat box filled up with "kika slash noob" and "kriss noop" by "Pro" twats with axes and kukris in no time!
Kukri, Kukri Halloween, Kukri Royal Dragon, Kukri Gold
Katana, Golden Katana
- Has the same "Hold down left click" abuse option as the Kriss, but although being twice a large and menacing, it isn't anywhere near as powerful. This complies with Crossfire's typical backwards-assed logic
Field Shovel, Field Shovel Xmas, Field Shovel Halloween, Field Shovel Red Dragon
- Due to Crossfire's terrible hit registry, you will die in 1 hit from 6 ft. away against an opponent with this melee.
Machete
- It looks absolutely nothing like what you are thinking of now. It looks more like a makeshift hunk of metal from the bottom of a car with some bandages as a handle painted black and sharpened with a grinder using a cutting disk.
Brass Knuckles
- Now you can beat people up like the nigger you are. Also reskinned as boxing gloves so you can go fucking Sylvester Stallone on people.
Bladed Knuckles
- Brass knuckles with a 6-inch blade on each hand. As if they needed to be any more over powered.
You can and will spend more money on getting these virtual, 3D objects than it would cost you to get an actual IRL weapon of the same type!
There is also an incomprehensibly huge amount of guns added into the game with a few new ones each update, the vast majority costing IRL money in obscene amounts, especially if you want to gamble to try and win a permanent gun covered in sparkles. Z8 insists on using a "Money first, fixes later" template for each update, choosing to focus on introducing moar sparkly guns that cost big $$ as opposed to fixing ancient bugs, improving the interface, or fixing their completely unreliable, shaky, and sometimes downright broken servers. More often then not Z8Games group of untrained monkeys, otherwise known the "Staff", introduce more bugs into the game with each update, sometimes completely breaking the game for a day or two and creating massive server lag for weeks. File:Youmadmate? Gets Mad.png Z8 is in contract with their chosen brand of anti-cheat, know as X-Trap (AKA X-Crap or Doesn't Fucking Work). This anti-cheat is by far the most ineffective ever created, with each update being bypassed by Crossfire's massive hack community within 30 minutes. Pre-pubescent no-lifes flood the forum with complaints about how the game is nearly unplayable because of Arabs with their shitty shot-gun hacks invading every game. The Z8 forum mods and minimodding ass-kissers like YouMadMate respond by giving the same copy-paste responses, such as:
- "Keeping hacks out is harder than you think"
- "Z8 and X-trap are trying their hardest to continually update and find new ways to keep hacks out"
- "We care about our playerbase"
All of which is a big fucking lie. The simple solution to this problem would to IP ban Egyptian and Turkish players, from which roughly 80% of the hacks originate from, but because Z8 is made of 100% Jew, this will never happen.
It would be unfair, however, to just blame Z8 for being jews in the NA/UK version. Other versions and their respective distributors wreak of repulsive business practices themselves. CF Vietnam, for example, replaced the starter melee that is in every other version, the knife, with a massive wooden hammer in a bout of epic jew trolling. They claimed that they replaced the knife with something less lethal because they were attempting to "Discourage knife violence", because you know, people become more inclined to go on a rampage with their mom's kitchen knives because you can stab people in a 3rd-rate ageing poorly maintained FPS focused on SHOOTING PEOPLE.Other bladed weapons, such as the Combat Axe, Kukri, Katana, and Machete, all costing IRL $$, were not removed from the game. In reality this was a marketing ploy to get people to buy crates in an attempt to get an actually usable melee that doesn't way 6 tons and doesn't take 4 hits to kill someone.
VIP Shitfest
So somewhere along the lines, Z8 decided that they weren't making enough money and thought up the perfect solution: introduce more sparkly guns with lights for the incredibly low price of $85-$125! All the gaming Whores were quick to blow their load all over these guns and purchase them with their parent's credit card. All of these guns are incredibly overpowered and give out 200% EXP/GP bonuses in every room you use them in. The more VIP guns you own, the more EXP/GP you get when using them in game. This was great news for the no-life farmers who were quick to purchase 4 identical VIP weapons and proceed to blow themselves up in grenade farming rooms for 8 hours a day so they could get a special 20X20 pixel icon next to their usernames. srsly. The AK-47 Fury also has a "Special" ability for all the "Special" people who play this game: The ability to erase your Kill-Death ratio after each match. So even if you suck shit at CF, you can just erase all your deaths after every round that you get raped in so your phony "Pro" KDR still looks good.
Fortunately, the guns introduced were not OP to the point of completely breaking the balance in-game. That is... Until they introduced the M4A1 Iron Beast. This gun has it all: High damage stats, ridiculous fire rate, 100% damage through boxes, practically no recoil, and a reload speed that before was only possible with Brazilian Hacks! With this addition, Crossfire's already near-broken gun balance became a completely broken mess with this pay-2-win gun that even an AhmedMidoPop69 could use and exterminate everybody. It is now a rare sight to see a Chink using anything but this gun.
Game Modes
Here is the list as follows
Search & destroy
In S&D, Black List attempts to plant a bomb, while Global risk basically camp in every corner of the map imaginable. Just imagine only two people from each team moving while everyone else waits behind walls hoping for someone to run by and you'll get a good idea about what it's all about. The 1 saving grace in this mode is that it is the most immune to hacking because it is generally where the small group of people who know how to identify an obvious hacker play the most, and obvious hacks tend to get their dirty Brazilian/Arab/Mexican/basement dweller asses kick voted to oblivion.
Team Deathmatch
Also known as "Spray and pray" mode. It is arguably the most played mode in crossfire. To give a vivid picture on this just imagine a WHOLE bunch of Autistic people on 10 pounds of sugar with super soakers running around and aiming at everything except their targets. So if you have a bad case of Parkinson like 95% of the crossfire player base, than this gamemode is right for you! It has become completely unplayable now because of the massive hack infestation. It is very common to see at least 1 person in the game shooting people through walls with a shotgun, aimbotting, running at inhuman speeds, hiding inside walls or under the map while instant headshotting with an MG3 LM, and players teleporting across the map. There is also sniper only, knife only, shotgun only (AKA hacks only), and headshot only modes. Head shot only is played by Canuck, Azn, and Americunt "pros" who wear head armor so it takes 2 hits to the head to kill them.
Ghost Mode
In this mode, one side is NOT invisible (GR) and has guns while the other side IS invisible(Ghost BL). The ghosts can only use melees, but are given the ability to run faster(Sounds fair). Same idea as S&D with planting/defusing.
Global Risk: Turn your gamma up to 100 so the ghosts will be easier to see when they move. This will make it fun since GR ALWAYS WINS! No. Ever since people figured out an exploit that keeps you invisible while still being able to move (Power word: Bunny hopping), there is the off chance HIGHLY LIKELY CHANCE that the ghosts/BL will win, especially if GR is full of Brazilians Egyptians and BL is full of ZP whoring gaymers.
Ghost Team/Black List: You're out of luck... (Unless you spend vast quantities of IRL money on crates in a naive attempt to get a "Best Item" or spend about $25 every three months on a temporary knife). The ghosts emit a VERY heavy breathing sound, but most didn't realize this when ghost mode was first added, and some still fucking don't. At first GR hid in corners shooting in every possible direction in fear of the enemy, who at the time almost nobody knew could move while invisible through physics-engine exploits. It was eventually discovered that the only way to counter this is by having any kind of sound system that gives directional output so you can track the breathing of the enemies from 10-15 meters away.
GM has the biggest concentrated number of complainers and crying faggots out of every mode. All people bitch about is how you killed them or what "circumstances" you killed them under. Examples:
- Type Kill
- BUT I HITS YOU FIRST
- Lucky I was (doing something completely irrelevant) and/or running
- I wasn't trying
- This isn't even, MY FINAL FORM!
- Camper
- Sprayer (Minigunning a room apart is a fine example of trolling the ghosts right out of Ghostmode altogether)
- ShottyFag (because it's unfair using a close range weapon against someone trying to get close to you)
- I let you kill me/I gave up
- People who use sound to find ghosts: Damn sprayers, cant hear a thing.
- 1Hitting nub
- Generic Moonspeak or Mexican Words
- Rushnub
PROTIP: If a ghost calls you a hacker just keep killing him, he cant do shit about it unless someone of the same Brazilian ethnicity white knights for him and tries to vote-kick you, of which usually fails because some people are so bad they WANT supposed h4ckers on their teams so they can win. Another side-effect is him leaving the game, joining back in on your team, and then trying to vote-kick you himself of which everyone lulz at his unnecessary persistence and huge fucking ego.
Elimination
Same thing as S&D except that in most maps you can not use your own guns and you must fight for the 1 or 2 decent guns on the ground with your inept team and there is no bomb to plant/defuse. Terminal and Water Plant EM are the lulziest maps in the entire game because the only guns available in the map are a bunch of XM1014 shotguns and 2 Desert Eagle pistols . The shotgun is completely inaccurate and unpredictable and a typical match resembles a bunch of niggers on shrooms attempting to play dodge ball with a cactus. It really has to be seen to be believed.
Escape
A shit gamemode where BL attempts to get into an escape portal, while GR does nothing but camp around the map. This mode is overrun with retard cheaters who "Modem Tap": Basically, they turn of their internet for about 10 seconds, run to the escape portal, and turn their internet back on. This allows them to "Teleport" into the portal with no way of the opposing team to stop them.
Mutation Mode, Hero Mode, & Hero Mode X
In this glorified version of tag, 1-3 people are transformed in to mutants while everyone else has to shoot them to pieces or get mutated themselves. The mutants look like absolutely fucking retarded green hunchbacked midgets with terrible voice effects created in Audacity. As with every mode in this game, camping is a must. It is not uncommon to see an orgy of players jammed in a corner with LMGs/Gatling Guns/KSGs firing aimlessly at the noob Egyptian mutants. In HMX, the mutants get a "Super Mutant" of some kind, 1 of which being the Xeno mutant which is a blatant and shameless rip off that they probably never acquired the rights to use. The other is the Havoc, a green greasy slimeball modeled after GM Saidin himself. On the other hand, the few players that survive can magically transform into a super powered superhuman wielding dual melees. The first is called the Commando, and his design looks like it was taken out of the worst B-Movie action film of the 1980's. The second is called the Ranger: An overly voluptuous woman with massive boobs for all the Arabs to fap to.
This mode is probably the best for demonstrating CF's terrible hit registry issues. You can be 6 ft. away from a mutant player with 200 ping and they will still mutate you. These modes also contain the most bugs in the entirety of Crossfire, with the game effectively trolling you by making you fall through the ground on the last round of a 17 round game, giving you a "Client Error" or inaccurate "Hack Tool Detected" error, and eject you from the game making you lose all the EXP and GP you spent the last 35 minutes building up.
Zombie Mode
Zombie mode is basically a cheap knock-off Nigger Ops Zombie modes, except with 100% less complexity (Shockingly enough), and 200% moar gay, shit, and bugs. The "Zombies" start out weak and rapidly progress into beings that can run faster than you, taking an entire rifle magazine to even hurt, and upwards of 10 shots to the head to kill. The pile of Rick Santorum that is the AI/Game Engine has the Zombies frequently running in random directions and then b-lining it to you. There are several Zombie types, most of which do not look like "Zombies" at all and instead look like movie monsters from the absolute worst nuclear disaster themed movie from the 80's. The best/worst part of zombie mode is the PLAYERS. There are 3 kinds of people who play ZM:
1. The usual suspects (BRs, EGYs, Turks, etc.) who play it because it's the only game mode they can feel some accomplishment in because they passed wave 6. 2. The very small group of people who derive some sort of enjoyment from this mode. 3. Hackers aimbotting all the zombies and 1-hit KO-ing the boss to get an MG3 LM, so they can wreak havoc with their hacks in TD.
So what's in it for the players? Well this is admittedly the only aspect of the game that Z8 didn't wank their corporate 3-inch dicks all over. You earn "Crates" that only contain timed items; the more points you rack up, the better the items in the crate. ZM is the only place you can get some of the ultimate trolling weapons in the game from, including the Kriss, MG3, G3, and MiniMI.
- Earn reward crates on the amount of points you get in-game for damage(X1 if alone, X5 in with someone, X10 with 2 other people, X20 with 3 other people)
- 50000 = 1 Bronze
- 100000 = 2 Bronze
- 140000 = 1 Silver
- 250000 = 2 Silver
- 500000 = 1 Gold
- 700000 = 1 Crystal/Red Crystal
- Beating one of the bosses 5 times gets you a boss crate of which contains the Crystal-Crates items + some other OP shit
- All of these reward crates contain items to both help you next time you play ZM (healing) and give you aesthetic changes or even guns that cost IRL money/cant be obtained elsewhere/
gives you shit guns nobody uses.DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS. Gold, Crystal, and Boss crates are the only way to get the MG3 LM and the Minimi Gold for the ultimate Ghost Mode trolling. We must make sure GMers can't have nice things.
Wave Mode
LOL NOBODY PLAYS WAVE MODE
Shadow Mode
Shadow Mode: Ghost Mode for people with even less skill. The premise is the same: 1 side normal GR (guns, not invisible) and the other side ghost BL (Melees, invisible, can run faster). There are 2 variations of the game: elimination and INF (Respawn as the opposite team until the time runs out/1 side is depleted). It differs from GM in that in order for the ghosts to stay invisible, they have to keep running, so no bullshit Bhoping here (Thank god). A normal game consists of noob GRs getting scared and spraying gunfire everywhere at the invisible but quite audible ghosts, and noob ghosts not understanding that slashing makes them visible. The ghost's breathing sounds very akin to an obese man masturbating, and playing this mode with that mental image is a challenge in it's own right.
How to troll ingame
- Any Game mode(except ZM)
- Camp
- Kick Vote the best player on your team. If it doesn't go through, leave and come back so your vote kicks are refreshed.
- Glitch into a box. Your enemies will not be able to see you, but you will be able to see them.
- Hack
- Bait noobs. This is accomplished in 3 steps. Firstly, you must have some sort of "Special" gun, one that can not be purchased with GP in the item shop. Enter an SnD or TD room. Secondly, hide behind a box or in a shallow indent of the map. Thirdly, throw your sparkle gun out in to the open and wait for a noob to see it. If your lucky, they will stop to drop their gun and pick up yours without looking to see if it was a trap. Take the opportunity to shoot them in the head with your pistol. Here is a video of somebody doing it right:
- Ghost Mode
- Get a loudass gun. You can try weapons out on a shooting range before obtaining them for use ingame. Find the loudest gun you can and buy it. Bonus points if its fully automatic/high ammo count/lots a dakka/just buy a fucking machinegun (PROTIP: M60, RPK, or Colt M16A3 are your best choices).
- Go into a ghost mode game and see if there is anyone with what looks to be a high rank playing on the Global Risk team. If there is, get on their team if not already and get into the game.
- Find them, follow them around, and shoot aimlessly just for the fuck of it.
- They will get REALLY pissed because chances are a ghost will seize the opportunity to pop up and manage to put an axe through your torso and into their head.
- Even moar RAEG as they are probably trying to votekick you the second they die.
- In TD
- Win a Kriss from Zombie Mode and proceed to knife people in Sniper Only TD matches. This pisses off people to no end and will induce RAEG.
- Throw grenades at your teammates. Though it can not 1-hit KO on somebody with full health, it will shave off up to 20 HP with a direct hit.
- In S&D and EM
- Use an M12s
- Jump around/on/in front anyone sniping. This will piss them off and they will probably try to kick you. Bonus points if you team-nade them or throw a smoke grenade right in front of their sniping path, forcing them to move.
- Throw flash grenades at your own teammates, especially if they are shooting at an opponent.
- In S&D, be the last person alive on GR after the bomb has been planted. Kill the last BL player, and instead of defusing the bomb, commit grenade suicide, or simply run away from the bomb, giving BL the victory.
- Another method of ruining a win for your team on S&D is to be one of the few people left on the GR side after all the BL team has been eliminated and the bomb has been planted. Run over to the bomb, crouch, and just tap the "E" key so it makes the "Bomb defusing" sound, but do not hold down the key so no defusing is actually taking place. By the time your team figures out you aren't defusing, it will be too late and the bomb will explode, giving BL the win.
- There are also a few ways to troll on the BL side in S&D. The best way is to start as the C4 carrier, or pick it up after the original holder dies, and throw it into a certain location where you can't get it back. There are a few locations where you can do this on the map Eagle Eye, including 1 right in the spawn point.
- Be the C4 carrier on BL, and proceed to run right into the enemy lines. When you die, the bomb will be dropped surrounded by the GR team, and it will likely screw over BL.
- MM,HM,HMX
- Get a friend, find a narrow passageway that only 1 person can fit through at a time. When one of you gets mutated, simply block your friend in so others can not get past you to mutant your friend. This will force everyone to stand around for 2 minutes while they cuss you out and attempt to kick you. Especially effective on the maps Merida and Mall.
- If you do not have a friend, blocking can also be accomplished to keep others trapped! For example, on the map Merida, there is a cage that everyone likes to huddle in with their gatling guns and MG3s. Usually, they run out of ammo and the mutant players invade and fuck everyone up. Seize the opportunity to take a chillax break right inside the narrow 1-person entrance. This will be responded to with "Move, faggot" and multiple vote-kick attempts.
- On the map Resort, there is a fountain that propels you 30 ft. into the air with nothing but flawless Crossfire Logic! Make sure you don't do anything but jump up and down on the fountain because CF's terrible hit registry will make it very difficult for the mutants to mutate you.
- Escape
- Modem-tap
- Zombie Mode
- Block people constantly and make them take a lot of damage, especially fighting the guys over 10ft. tall with large weapons they probably don't use properly if at all/spiky rainbow-hued giants/fleshy balls of muscle.
- Or look at the scoreboard and (with a friend probably) vote kick the top player
passed round 15 on easy, or round 25 on normal... then ditch the game to find another. This will not only troll the top player into a RAEG mode, but will screw over the other player(s) left in that game because there is only 1-2 people left and nobody can join late in the game.NOPE! Z8 is now giving out free "Intrusion Coins" which let you join at any round you want.
- Shadow Mode
- Same deal as GM: Get a loud as fuck gun with a huge ammo count and just spray your heart out.
- In the clan server
- Join a clan with an offensive name, or one that is a complete copy of a more popular clan. Trolling points if you recruit noobs into your clan because you claim to be the clan you are copying.
- Find a room of people waiting for a rival clan to join. Join it and just sit in the room. In the clan server, the room host can not kick you out of the room, so in order to actually play a game, they'll be forced to make a new room. As soon as they leave to do that, follow them to that room and do the exact same thing.
- If you find yourself losing a clan war, do not fear! Simply leave the game. Bonus trolling points if you leave at half-time when the sides are being switched out on the map. Just hit the "ESC" key and you'll eject yourself from the room. This will cause the other team to have to wait 2 minutes stuck in a loading screen while the broken game tries to figure out what just happened.
- If a teammate says or texts "I'm lit" or "I'm low on HP", make sure you throw grenade at him/her for a glorious team kill!
- Join a tournament with your half-assed clan and do nothing but trash talk the other team and accuse them of hacking, while glitching in boxes and using "Illegal" guns like the M12s or Scar Light.
So-called Elite channels
Echo 8 is a place where faggots who engage in faggotry go due to their xenophobic nature and egotistical fantasies of being "pro" at a poorly managed, aging game with bad graphics and gunfire registry problems (shots do not register damage).
Alpha 7 is a place where faggots who engage in faggotry go due to their tendency to hang out with other chinks who like them; only play S&D Black widow and TDM Ship.
July 16, 2014 patch failure
In what is likely the biggest after-patch game breaking since the Dinner Theater ZM patch (AKA client error for using your knife week), the G4Box staff have once again proven their total competence at transferring data. What did they do this time, you may inquire? Oh, nothing too important, JUST THE ABILITY FOR EVERY USER TO USE GAME MOD COMMANDS.
Here's a list of just some of the lulz you could accomplished before they pulled the plug on the servers:
- Infinite health/godmoding
- Customization EXP gain
- The ability to adjust ranks at will
- Adjusting the time remaining in a room (Making simple 12 minute TDM matches last for 999 minutes if you see it fit)
- The ability to kick/temp ban any user out of the match at will (Rumored, not proven)
- The ability to spawn any gun that any user is using in the room to your character
- Insta drop "Airstrikes" on wavemode
- Bringing Devastation ZM only special weapons into other modes. This includes the lazor gun, minigun, and sticky grenades.
- Transforming into mutants in non-HM gamemodes.
And that's just SOME of the fun you could have. As usual, the Egyptians exploited this the most, but it was pretty much a clusterfuck with just about everyone doing it.
Previous Video | Next Video
But that isn't even all of it, no no no. Serious server connection issues ran wild, with many just giving up because of how often the game kicked their asses out. They also felt it was a good idea to introduce a Kriss Super-V SMG into the FP mall (Basically guns you can purchase timed for free with "Points" you get from playing matches.) Not only was this a slap in the face to anyone who had previously spent actual money trying to win one of these M12s reskins in the nigger market, but it's also doubling as the hackers new favorite weapon!
The final straw that broke the dirty Egyptian camel's back, however, was a RESPACT ARE RELIJION RAID part 2! Just like on the Wave Mod patch earlier this year, the 12 year old sand niggers found a page of the Koran on the ground of the new ZM map. Boo fucking hoo. And cry they did, with the forums and Facebook page spammed to hell with raging self entitled religious patriots demanding that they remove the little square of pixels, spamming #Remove_Quran_From_TheGround relentlessly. Z8Games was quick to give in, prompting it's removal from the map. This is quite ironic considering every else from every other nationality has been calling and complaining in mass numbers for a decent hacking fix, but this is duly ignored because Z8 has the collective brains of an autistic 10 year old.
Staff
The Z8games staff consist of the main game moderator called by his forum name '[GM]Saidin'. He is a mentally retarded ginger haired 30 something (not 'round the waist) that does relatively nothing other than make useless events that give away items that nobody wants for 7 days and posting the same old copypasta bullshit about how Z8 is "Constantly trying to improve" across the forums. By "Improve" he means "Adding new VIP weapons". Remember that.
The forum moderators are chosen by [GM]Saidin, and as expected, they are only pussies and mod suck-ups. Anyone who dares show a little personality after being modded is kicked the fuck off the team. Moderating on the forums is a BIG JOB, as evident of having to post robotic messages and/or lock the 100 threads made a day rightfully complaining about how the X-Trap hack-shield is easy to bypass and how the website and game are filled with broken shit and bugs.
If you think the staff is bad, than you should see Z8's marketing team, or lack thereof. In Z8's business ideology, advertising and promoting the game off-website is too much of a hassle. You will be hard-fetched to find a single advertisement for Crossfire anywhere, even on cheap virus infested flash game websites. This is because Z8 literally doesn't do any off-website promoting and marketing. This was heavily apparent by the introduction of a few new games to their website, all of which either died or moved on to a different host site. One, called Fishing Hero, only lasted a month before being shut down. Yeah, great idea guys! As bad as it sounds, it had the slim possibility of catching on, yet this was killed by absolutely no off-site marketing. Because yeah, FPS players also tend to enjoy fishing sims.
Butthurt Faggotry on the Forum!
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This article making it's grand debute on the official Z8games forum! Funnily enough, the author was not responsible for this.
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An Ex-mod can't see the art in making ED articles
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IReZ speaking the obvious truth
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Jizzlefairy: Worlds worst troll. He doesn't like being in this article.
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Some forumers actually recognize satire
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Thread deleted? Repost.
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Threads like this are common. The authors should do us all a favor
Weblinks
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