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Ted Bundy: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|TED BUNDY'S GHOST HAUNTS RAIFORD PRISON WHERE HE WAS PAWNED ON THE ELECTRIC CHAIR!!!!}} | |||
[[Image:Bundy.gif|thumb|right|Super Ted.]] | |||
[[Image:Ted-bundy.jpg|thumb|right|He did it for the lulz.]] | |||
{{quote|I'm the most cold-blooded sonofabitch you'll ever meet.|Ted Bundy, being an [[Internet tough guy]] in [[last Thursday|the days before the Internet]].}} | |||
'''Ted Bundy''' (born '''Theodore Robert Cowell'''; November 24, 1946 – January 24, 1989) was the greatest fucking [[hero]] to men on earth sent by [[God]] to show [[Women|you dumb-ass bitches]] a valuable lesson in life, since it's a well known fact that you women [[Truth|are the inferior gender]] and deserve to be [[Raped|victimized]] and [[Murdered|disposed of]] for being the promiscuous, stupid whores you are. | |||
After more than a decade of denials he confessed shortly before his execution to thirty [[Murder|homicides]] committed in seven states between 1974 and 1978; the true total remains unknown, and could be [[Over 9000|much higher]]. | |||
The reign of Ted Bundy should never be forgotten, as his epic tirade against [[niggers]] has been constantly researched and acknowledged by troubled [[OJ|men]] everywhere. Some examples of men doing the world a favor are Richard Ramirez, John Allen Mohammed, David Berkowitz, Scott Peterson and many [[Truth|fucking more.]] | |||
==Crimes== | |||
There is no definitive consensus on when and where Bundy began killing women. It is thought that he began killing as a form of revenge against women, after having been [[friend zone|friendzoned]] by a woman he was [[stalking|interested in]], since most of his victims somewhat resembled the woman in question. Such similarities included, but were not limited to, having two legs, two eyes, teeth and, most importantly, hair parted in the middle, which Bundy [[fetish|had a massive boner for]]. | |||
Bundy told [[Trolling|different stories to different people]], and he refused to divulge the specifics of his earliest crimes, even as he confessed dozens of later murders in the days preceding his execution. [[Some_argue|Some circumstantial evidence]] suggests that he abducted and killed an [[Loli|8-year-old]] Tacoma girl in 1961 when he was fourteen years old, an allegation he [[Lie|denied repeatedly]]. Bundy committed his earliest documented homicides in 1974 when he was 27. By then he had (by his own admission) mastered the [[Hacker|skills]] needed to leave minimal incriminating evidence at a crime scene. There is alot of proof out there that some nigger did the murders. Then the Jews framed Bundy as they thought they could blame whites for crime. | |||
==Modus Operandi== | |||
[[File:You're A Fine Piece Of Ass Says Ted Bundy.png|thumb|right|Ted, eyeing up the ladies.]] | |||
Bundy was a fucking sexy man and scored more pussy than [[you]] would ever dream of getting. He was <s>handsome</s> and charismatic, traits he exploited in [[Winnar|winning]] the confidence of his [[Stupid|young]], [[Ugly|attractive]] [[Whore|female]] victims. He typically approached them in public places and feigned injury or disability, or impersonated an authority figure, before overpowering and assaulting them at a more secluded location. He sometimes revisited his secondary crime scenes for hours at a time, grooming and [[Necrophilia|performing sexual acts]] with the decomposing corpses until putrefaction and destruction by wild animals made further interaction impossible. He decapitated at least four victims and kept the severed heads in his apartment for a period of time as mementos. On a few occasions he simply broke into dwellings in the dead of night and [[Lulz|bludgeoned]] victims as they slept. | |||
==Capture, Escape, Recapture, Escape Again, Recapture, Execution== | |||
Initially charged in Utah in 1975 and convicted of aggravated kidnapping and attempted criminal assault, Bundy became linked to a progressively longer list of unsolved homicides in multiple states. Facing [[Murder|murder]] charges in Colorado, he engineered two dramatic [[Lulz|escapes]], and [[Profit!|committed at least three additional murders and several violent assaults]] in Florida before his ultimate [[V&|recapture]] in 1978. Failing to acknowledge that had been doing [[Humanity|humanity]] a favor and those [[Whore|women]] were [[asking for it]], prosecutors gave him three death sentences in two separate trials for the three known Florida homicides, before sending him off to [[Pikachu|Ol' Sparky]]. | |||
{{quote|I'd like you to give my love to my family and friends.|Bundy's last words. Classy to the end.}} | |||
== Graded Score == | |||
{{GradedScore|'''35'''|35+ Kills in a 4 year period|20|Left almost zero evidence behind the scenes of his murders|20|Knew how to put [[Whores|women]] in their place|'''21'''|Still the most well known serial killer in history|'''999,999,999,999'''|A literal legend|∞|S+++++|The greatest man who's ever lived}} | |||
{{WantedLevel|level=custom|customstars=<big><big><big><big><big>∞</big></big></big></big></big>|custompic=[[File:Nuke.jpg|256px]]|customdesc=GOD}} | |||
==Gallery== | |||
{{cg|Gallery|Teddy|center|<gallery> | |||
Image:TedBundymovie.jpg|If you kill enough people, maybe they'll make a movie about you, too. | |||
Image:Ted's Dead, Baby.png|Ted's dead, baby. | |||
Image:Lol Bundy.jpg|You amuse Ted. | |||
Image:Bundybushlookalike.jpg|[[Bush|An uncanny resemblance]] | |||
</gallery>|<gallery> | |||
Image:Bundy Family.jpg|Bundy, in happier times, with his family and [[MILF|slutty wife]]. | |||
Image:Al-bundy.jpg|Al Bundy approves. | |||
Image:Bundymoviescreencap.jpg|Why yes, they did include necrophiliac rape scenes in the movie about him | |||
Image:Ted's Car.jpg|Ted's gay car. What kind of man drives a fucking Volkswagen Beetle? Srsly. What a fag. | |||
Image:Ted Bundy's Murder Kit.jpg|Ted's murder kit. | |||
Image:And Not A Single Fuck Was Given - Bundy.jpg|Bundy reacts to his sentencing. | |||
Image:Fbbundycleaver.jpg|Quaint. | |||
Image:FBI-360-Ted Bundy FBI 10 most wanted photo.jpg | |||
Image:Bundynom.jpg|[[Om nom nom]]... | |||
File:BundyAmericanIcon.jpg|America's Bad Boy | |||
File:ImightjustbeTEDBUNDY.jpg | |||
</gallery>}} | |||
==Bundy's Fangirls== | |||
[[Image:Ted-bundy-in-court picnik.jpg|thumb|I love you too, ladies]] | |||
In the months leading up to his execution, Bundy received countless letters from [[Sluts|female admirers]], [[Typical|wishing to make love to the violent serial killing rapist]], one of the most infamous of which was [[Ayn Rand]]. Then again, this is more than [[you|you've]] ever got. Maybe if you murdered hundreds of women, girls would like you too. Go on, it'll be easy. There's plenty of knives in the kitchen drawer. Go on. The blood must flow. | |||
[[DO IT FAGGOT]]. | |||
[[Batshit insane|GOTTA FEED BLOOD TO TO THESE VOICES IN MY HEAD!!!! MOMMY.. YOU WILL HAVE TO GO FIRST, MUM! THEN THE LITTLE SCHOOL CHILDREN WILL BE NEXT, THIS IS A MISSION FROM JESUS!!!]] | |||
==See Also== | |||
*[[Murder]] | |||
*[[Misogyny]] | |||
*[[An hero]] | |||
*[[Nice guys]] | |||
{{High Scores}} | |||
{{lulzhistory}} | |||
{{Psychopaths}} | |||
[[Category:People|Bundy, Ted]] | |||
[[Category:Serial Killers]] | |||
{{timeline|Article of the Now February 19 and 20, [[2024]]|[[Lesbian ]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Fancy Macelli]]}} | |||
Revision as of 16:38, 25 August 2024
 |
This faggot waits for the child to make the first move in a sexual situation.
You can help by contacting Federal Authorities and alerting Chris Hansen. |
|
please click here and slowly scroll down to the bottom of the page. |
—Ted Bundy, being an Internet tough guy in the days before the Internet. | ||
Ted Bundy (born Theodore Robert Cowell; November 24, 1946 – January 24, 1989) was the greatest fucking hero to men on earth sent by God to show you dumb-ass bitches a valuable lesson in life, since it's a well known fact that you women are the inferior gender and deserve to be victimized and disposed of for being the promiscuous, stupid whores you are.
After more than a decade of denials he confessed shortly before his execution to thirty homicides committed in seven states between 1974 and 1978; the true total remains unknown, and could be much higher.
The reign of Ted Bundy should never be forgotten, as his epic tirade against niggers has been constantly researched and acknowledged by troubled men everywhere. Some examples of men doing the world a favor are Richard Ramirez, John Allen Mohammed, David Berkowitz, Scott Peterson and many fucking more.
Crimes
There is no definitive consensus on when and where Bundy began killing women. It is thought that he began killing as a form of revenge against women, after having been friendzoned by a woman he was interested in, since most of his victims somewhat resembled the woman in question. Such similarities included, but were not limited to, having two legs, two eyes, teeth and, most importantly, hair parted in the middle, which Bundy had a massive boner for.
Bundy told different stories to different people, and he refused to divulge the specifics of his earliest crimes, even as he confessed dozens of later murders in the days preceding his execution. Some circumstantial evidence suggests that he abducted and killed an 8-year-old Tacoma girl in 1961 when he was fourteen years old, an allegation he denied repeatedly. Bundy committed his earliest documented homicides in 1974 when he was 27. By then he had (by his own admission) mastered the skills needed to leave minimal incriminating evidence at a crime scene. There is alot of proof out there that some nigger did the murders. Then the Jews framed Bundy as they thought they could blame whites for crime.
Modus Operandi
Bundy was a fucking sexy man and scored more pussy than you would ever dream of getting. He was handsome and charismatic, traits he exploited in winning the confidence of his young, attractive female victims. He typically approached them in public places and feigned injury or disability, or impersonated an authority figure, before overpowering and assaulting them at a more secluded location. He sometimes revisited his secondary crime scenes for hours at a time, grooming and performing sexual acts with the decomposing corpses until putrefaction and destruction by wild animals made further interaction impossible. He decapitated at least four victims and kept the severed heads in his apartment for a period of time as mementos. On a few occasions he simply broke into dwellings in the dead of night and bludgeoned victims as they slept.
Capture, Escape, Recapture, Escape Again, Recapture, Execution
Initially charged in Utah in 1975 and convicted of aggravated kidnapping and attempted criminal assault, Bundy became linked to a progressively longer list of unsolved homicides in multiple states. Facing murder charges in Colorado, he engineered two dramatic escapes, and committed at least three additional murders and several violent assaults in Florida before his ultimate recapture in 1978. Failing to acknowledge that had been doing humanity a favor and those women were asking for it, prosecutors gave him three death sentences in two separate trials for the three known Florida homicides, before sending him off to Ol' Sparky.
—Bundy's last words. Classy to the end. | ||
Graded Score
| Kill count: | 35/20 35+ Kills in a 4 year period |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 20/20 Left almost zero evidence behind the scenes of his murders |
| Style: | 20/20 Knew how to put women in their place |
| Butthurt: | 21/20 Still the most well known serial killer in history |
| Bonus: | 999,999,999,999/20 A literal legend |
Wanted Level:
∞
GOD
Gallery
-
If you kill enough people, maybe they'll make a movie about you, too. -
Ted's dead, baby. -
You amuse Ted. -
-
Bundy, in happier times, with his family and slutty wife. -
Al Bundy approves. -
Why yes, they did include necrophiliac rape scenes in the movie about him -
Ted's gay car. What kind of man drives a fucking Volkswagen Beetle? Srsly. What a fag. -
Ted's murder kit. -
Bundy reacts to his sentencing. -
Quaint. -
-
Om nom nom... -
America's Bad Boy -
Bundy's Fangirls
In the months leading up to his execution, Bundy received countless letters from female admirers, wishing to make love to the violent serial killing rapist, one of the most infamous of which was Ayn Rand. Then again, this is more than you've ever got. Maybe if you murdered hundreds of women, girls would like you too. Go on, it'll be easy. There's plenty of knives in the kitchen drawer. Go on. The blood must flow.
See Also
|
Spree/One-time Killers: |
Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Anthony Warner • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Stephen Paddock • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon |
|---|---|---|
| Career/Serial Killers: |
Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs • Dubya • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy | |
| Terrorists: |
Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Maniacs Murder Cult • Mark Essex • Nidal Malik Hasan • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Ted Kaczynski | |
| See also: |
Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck |
| Article of the Now February 19 and 20, 2024 | ||
| Preceded by Lesbian |
Ted Bundy | Succeeded by Fancy Macelli |