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Five Nights at Freddy's: Difference between revisions
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=="Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria Simulator aka FNAF 6"== | =="Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria Simulator aka FNAF 6"== | ||
[[File:FNAF_Program100.jpg|thumb|right| | [[File:FNAF_Program100.jpg|thumb|right|If only he were 100% done with this shitbag franchise.]] | ||
Because the fucknugget needed to pull this shit again. | Because the fucknugget needed to pull this shit again. | ||
Revision as of 02:42, 31 May 2018
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THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ. BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM. |
Five Nights at Freddy's, spelled "jump scare simulator", created by some christfag named Scott Cawthon✡, is a click'n'play QTE game that focuses on spending five nights at a Chuck E. Cheese ripoff restaurant called Freddy Fazbear's. The only interaction you ever get to do is flip a tablet up looking at the screen and closing the doors when the monsters get too close. Despite its boring and bland gameplay, along with its 2001 video graphics, Five Nights at Freddy's somehow got popular thanks to tumblrfags, Pewdiepie fanboys, Markiplier fanboys, hipsters, furries who want to yiff Foxy, and meme-loving faggots that spend all day in their basements trying to be funny. What makes it even more of an insult is that it costs $4.99 on Steam, which is $5.99 too much.
History
This game started off nothing more as a boring piece of shit that would've been forgotten about in three days on IndieDB and Desura. Created by Scott Cawthon, who previously made biblical-themed games that sold only to Christian parents who wanted their kids playing them instead of Pokémon in the fears that they'll turn into a satanic baby killer. Around August 2014, the game saw a boost in popularity because of a faggot named Markiplier playing it and shitting his pants in fear about how super duper scary and innovative it is. The next few days saw his drones spreading the news about how scary Five Nights at Freddy's is. Eventually, the game found its new home with the Tumblr feminazis and ponyfaggots of Know Your Meme, where it became more popular over time due to the drone army.
Moar history
About a week after scaring the pants off of 12-year-olds and SJW hipster feminazis, Five Nights at Freddy's got green-lit to be sold on Steam, where the fanbase continues to show how great this game is by shoving down everybody's throats. Just like bronies, whovians, weeaboos, and furries, Five Nights at Freddy's fans feel the need to shove their love for the game down everybody's throats at any given moment, most the fans think it's the greatest game ever made or the game that's gonna save the horror survival genre, funny enough, 90% of the faggots in the fandom have never played the game. Say one bad thing about the game, from the fact that it has a ton of glitches or pressing escape closes the whole game instead of bringing you to a pause menu, or the fact that it's $5 for a game that looks like your typical F2P iPhone game. You'll piss the fanboy army off and get banned from the Steam Discussion forums on the game for triggering all the 12-year-olds with in two seconds. Criticism is not allowed, only praise.
How to play the game
So you still want to waste $5 on this useless game? Why don't you just pirate it, so you won't fund this faggot who made it? Either way, if you do want to buy the game or already own it, here's how to play.
Night 1: Listen to that nerd who had the job before you explain how to get through it all. He'll give you a history of Pedophile Paradise and all the tricks to survive. It's simple, close door when you feel threatened, open it if you don't, check monitor, look more for any of the animatronic animals trying to murder you. Oh and you also have limited power, the door and monitors drain the power quicker.
Night 2-5: The nerd dies on the fourth night. Repeat the same process as Night 1 nerd, oh and don't forget to pick up your paycheck, you got only $120 for risking your life guarding this place. GG.
Night 6: 1337 mode. The animatronics are now deadlier than usual and you don't have that faggot calling you before you risk your life for the 6th night in a row. Your reward is overtime pay of only 50¢ and Employee of the Month. Must feel good getting little pay and praise for doing nothing but sitting in an office all night begging to be killed.
Night 7: Custom mode. Try beating the game with 20/20/20/20 if you're so hardcore You are not hardcore. You Cant even beat 0/0/0/0
- Someone sees Five Nights at Freddy's for what it really is
Characters
| FNAF Characters | FNAF 2 Characters | FNAF 3 Characters | FNAF 4 Characters | FNAF World |
|---|
The fanbase
The wonderfully creative fanbase of this game sure is amazing. Past that, this is going to list the average fans you see on a daily basis, mainly in the YouTube comments section and other social media sites like Facebook, sometimes Twitter, and Tumblr.
The 12 year old: The typical fan of this game and probably the easiest to deal with. Usually are in the age range of 10-to-13-years-old and have probably never touched a horror game in their life. They get uber-defensive of the game and will make up any load of shit to defend it. It's also easy to convince them that the game is shit. Other games they're usually spotted in is Team Fortress 2, Minecraft, Blockland, or any other lame game with loads of little kids in it.
How to deal with them: Call them autistic and retarded creatures, along with furfags in training. If they're already a furfag, call them a pedophile in training. Say Five Nights at Freddy's sucks and is far worse than Bad Rats.
The Die-Hard: A step up to the original 12 year old, die hard fans who devote their life to the shittiest game ever will devote most of their time to making shitty animations on the fucking game, the animations are beyond cringe-worthy and are usually crossed referenced with Minecraft because it's original, or make shitty fangames(even thou, there are VERY few like 2 fangames that are better than the original games) to get their god to notice them or to, most likely, get some piece of the FNAF hype pie. These fans also go to the extent of buying merchandise and completely covering their basement walls with Five Nights At Freddie's fan-art (Which they probably paid for, making them even bigger fuck-wits). Most of these fans will go to the extent of pretending to be older (Fucking Paedophiles) while claiming any "Haters" are younger than them. These fans will also get their fucking Roleplay-mates, and fucking link arms in order to defend their game.
How to deal with them: To personally fuck with these idiots, nitpick at every little shitty thing they do, and constantly remind them that they're wasting their life making animations, making fangame(s), buying merchandise and defending a game with the sole purpose of adding cocks so the fans can suck them. To take things a step further and potentially generate more lulz, say that Undertale is a better game and watch the resultant flame war.
The tumblrina: Another large demographic. The tumblrinas are the fans of the game on Tumblr and are usually known to have roleplay accounts on YouTube, Facebook, Google+, and any other social media site. They're usually known for having FNAF-themed Tumblr blogs and reblogging nothing but the game or some shit tier anime. They also come up with shitty theories and argue the gender of the animatronics, despite them being genderless robots and then get super defensive of their headcanons and attempt to pass it off as canon. Can be considered the biggest cancer of the game's fanbase that aren't 12-year-old furries.
How to deal with them: Call them closet furries and tell them they're degenerate pedophiles that are gonna be the downfall of western civilization. Call their porn and fanart shit and that people with down syndrome have better art skills than them.
The Furry: By far, the most cancerous part of the Five Nights at Faggot's fanbase. It comes as no surprise of why they like this game other than the fact that it has killer animatronic animals in it that will forcefully stuff the main character into a fursuit and make him join their degenerative cult of animal fuckers. They also make a buttload of pr0nz and draw it in the fashion of their bad furry OCs. They even got fucking ad space on FurAffinity in order to promote the game. Of course when fantasizing about fucking the animatronics they always seem to "forget" the little detail about them having the rotting corpses of children in them.
How to deal with them: Call them autistic pedophiles and walk away. Furry tears guaranteed.
The brony: Another common member of this fandom. Usually are wildly immature and incredibly butthurt about everything, which explains why most FNAF fanboys are so defensive of this game. They come up with brilliant crossovers of FNAF and My Little Pony and usually draw the characters from the game poorly in MSPaint as ponies.
How to deal with them: Do the same thing as you would to furries.
The Dubstep kiddies: They're usually 12-to-16-year-old scene kids who pierced their penis and dropped out of high school during their freshman year, and their entire wardrobe comes from Hot Topic. They got into the game when the brony faggot TheLivingTombstone made yet another mix about this shitty game.
How to deal with them: Beat the shit out of them IRL.
The intellectual: Little kids (usually sixth or seventh graders, although there are the rare forms of eighth graders) who consider themselves to be "smarter" than other kids because they play "higher-quality" games that "make you think" about its "gripping" storyline.
How to deal with them: Call them retarded faggots and that playing FNAF doesn't make them above other people, and in fact makes you look even stupider than others than they normally would.
The Montage Parodist: The kids from Reddit who still think that montage parodies of TF2 gameplay are funny and doesn't realize they're just as big of a faggot as the guys who make serious montages. They usually make FNAF montage parodies with the typical shitty dubstep, sunglasses, weed, and everything else seen in parodies.
How to deal with them: Call them a faggot.
The creepypasta fags: The faggots who still read creepypastas. They're usually the ones who go around the Internet looking for SUPER DUPER SCARY GAMES AND CREEPYPASTAS. But wound up being complete and utter faggots. Most of them are quick to dismiss actual horror games because FNAF is supposedly a masterpiece, it is also worth noting that these misfits also love other stupid, not-scary horse shit such as: Sonic.exe, Squidward's suicide, paranormal activity movies and the Saw franchise.
How to deal with them: Say creepypastas aren't that scary anymore and FNAF just caters to furries and 12-year-old kids.
The theorists: The worst members of this fanbase. They'll do super deep analysis of the game and come up with some stupid fanboy theory. Most of their theories are absolutely laughable and hold no merit whatsoever, especially the ones who think that the robots have genders and want to fuck.
How to deal with them: Call their theories shit and show evidence that disproves their theories.
FNAF reaches out to their fans, by advertising on FurAffinity
Of course, Scott being the Jew in need of shekels that he is, wanted to reach out to his fanbase. Already getting free advertising on YouTube by Let's Players and the large amounts of FNAF related blogs on Tumblr by edgy 14-year-old otherkin faggots with stupid-ass pronouns, decided to reach out to the most perverted part of the entire fanbase by renting ad space on FurAffinity.
It's unknown if this advertising did anything to boost sales of the game, but it further prove that the majority of this game's fans are furries. The ad looked poorly done and was incredibly low quality, looking like something straight out of 2001, just like the game's graphics. Like with MLP, a lot of furries on the site had mixed emotions about it, with some hypocritically stating how disgusted they where, despite already being disgusting for being a furry. Others where annoyed by the game getting unneeded attention, and the fanboys on FA slurped it up and sucked Scott's small Jewish dick as he gathered their hard earned shekels on Steam to go straight back to his furry porn addiction.
Sequels
Since each game needs no money to make, and can be made in one day, it is to be expected that Scott will shit one of these every day for the rest of his life. At this point, it is uncertain whether Scott actually makes these games, or they regularly come out of his rear end.
Thanks to the furfaggot echo chamber demanding it, Five Night's at Freddy's is already getting a sequel. Supposedly supposed to be far more scarier than the first game, the trailer alone already says it all. With the doors being removed and a clever disguise when the animatronics get in your office. Yet you still don't have a weapon to defend yourself. It won't be long before Five Nights at Freddy's suffers the same fate as Call of Duty. Available now at Steam.
- Already this game looks as dumb as the first one
Whatever you thought bad about FNAF 1 you are going to be begging to have back in the sequel.
No doors? No matter! Now the game has a handy alarm siren for whenever the furries get within a one mile radius. On the first nights the game has you sitting and doing fuck all until you hear the sirens and then its off to checking the lights again. On the later nights the game throws every furry on the planet at you so that the alarms never stop, due to the shitty pirated sound effect from night 4 onwards it sounds as if you are in a submarine, Scott couldn't give away enough Jew gold for a half decent sound effect.
Remember how FNAF 1 had shitty pre-rendered graphics? FNAF 2 has it too, but its worse. Scott couldn't be bothered to even render the game in a 16:9 ratio this time, meaning every room will become warped and bent like a retarded MC Escher painting if you turn in the slightest. 4:3 FTW amirite?
Compare the animatronics from the first game to the ones in the second. Notice how in the second they all look much less animatronic and much more furry, even the old animatronics. Scott is either a closet furfag himself or is trying to cater to the queers that play his game. It is most likely a mixture of both though.
Scott assfucked the jump scares so hard that they make you facepalm rather than shit bricks. The general formula for the jump scare is as follows.
- Poorly designed face appears
- Face moves closer
- Loud scream
- Death
- ???
- PROFIT!!
Something to note is that in the first game Scott actually bothered to render the animatronics as part of the room when they attacked you, so that they stayed in place when you were shitting bricks. In the sequel Scott thought to himself 'fuck it, make it an overlay that follows your screen as you turn around and do other unnecessary shit.' Because apparently nothing is scarier than an animatronic skating around the room lightning fast or diving straight out of a wall at you.
Should you continue playing until the later nights your average gameplay experience will look something like this...
Despite this, all of the cocksucking nerds, furries and "professional" critics alike have given this game a 10/10 praising it for innovative gameplay, amazing graphics and a well crafted storyline, but let us keep that last point in mind because these so called "professional critics" are also the ones who believe that 300, Wreck-It Ralph, Guardians of Ga'Hoole, Independence Day and Dragon Wars are on par with fucking Lawrence of Arabia, they clearly have a child's understanding of narrative complexity.
FNAF3
Believe it or not, Scott has already released FNAF 3, and as you have expected, it's shit. He released it not even three months after FNAF 2 because he wanted to make even more shekels from the sheeple fan base buying the game on Steam. Even better, it's the same fucking game as the first two with very little changes whatsoever.
- It already looks even more rushed than FNAF2.
Upon release, at least 360 fans bulletin-point style reviewed the game on Steam, and you know a game is good when you don't even have to play it for an hour to fully review it.
FNAF4
Looks like the Scott man is at it again. Supposedly claimed to be the final chapter, knowing Scott, he's gonna release another one two months later. Except this time, there's gonna be extra spooky content on Halloween 2015, from what the fagdom knows about the story is that you play as a child that is all alone in their house and being stalked by the mecha-rapists, currently wanked over by furfags as they now are called Nightmare versions of the animatronics. Nope, it looks like Scott couldn't help himself as he released his shitty game three fucking months before Halloween since he had already rushed through it like he did with the others. He claims it was due to him "not being good with release dates", but we all know that's not the fucking truth. Unsurprisingly, this game is the most critically panned installment to date.
FNAF World
Scott REALLY outdid himself this time. FNAF World is a crappy JRPG that requires less player input than Final Fantasy XIII, and is so repetitive and boring that after 30 minutes, you'll immediately uninstall the game so your computer doesn't have to writhe in agony anymore. The game basically revolves around the FNAF characters beating the shit out of enemies with huge difficulty spikes in every room you go to. There's no character development, barely any NPCs, and a story so forgettable you have to go on to a wiki to remember a basic summary. The game was so rushed that there isn't even move descriptions and a stats screen for characters. It's so painfully monotonous and dull that by the time you reach the end of the game you've endured more 12 second loading screens than Sonic '06. It's so easy that if you let your characters constantly heal, you'll never die once. It sucks so much the fans and even Scott Cawthon himself admits the game sucks ass, and did us all a favor and removed it from the Steam Store to give it updates. You can polish a turd all you want Mr. Cawthon, but at the end all you get is a shiny turd. Hopefully this kills FNAF for good so in a few months, the fandom dies off and we never have to hear from FNAF ever again.
"The Silver Eyes"
As if Scitt couldn't sell out enough, he decided to write a fucking book based on this. The premise in a shellnut is that some chick named Charlie or Charolette has a dad who ran Pedophile Paradise and is trying to forget the kids that got 420rekt there. Then one day her and some dipshit friends decide to go find the place and when they do shit hits the fan faster than you could say 9/11 was an inside job. Shut up and take my money, amiright? Also, apparently this dogshit isnt canon with the games, proof that Scawt cant even stick to the shit already made (as if FNAF World wasnt evidence enough).
"Sister location"
Looks like the jewking himself hasn't farmed enough shekels from his fanbase , now he's made this as a "spin off" of the original fnaf series. Released in October 2016, this time you spend 5 nights in a place called "sister location", a warehouse where all of the furry robots are rented out to birthday parties. You play as William Afton (aka Purple Guy) and end up dying on night 5 when the robots trick you into entering the scooping room, where they proceed to disembowel you through your ass and climb inside of you. Confused? Blame Scott. This is the shittiest game in the series to date. Okay, second to FNAF World. Also the promos show baby alot, but in the game, not once shows up or even in the fucking game other then a minigame and voice.
"Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria Simulator aka FNAF 6"
Because the fucknugget needed to pull this shit again.
Scott's latest and supposedly the "final" cash grab of a game in the series. You get tricked into running your own Freddy's knock off pizzeria. All you do is just adding shit around the place (while trying not to get a lawsuit), playing the games for points (and hidden "lore"), and then sitting at the computer, ordering stuff while some robots (who were William Afton, his daughter from Circus Baby, and a lot of other nobodies) you save from the alleyway at the end of each night if done right, try to kill you like always. Also you all burn to death as the shitty ending. This is met to close and to answer all the things in the already confusing "story" that he got from his cancerous fanbase (mostly from MatPat as Scott was stroking Mat's ego even more with adding his shitty theories), only to make it even more of a mess. If anything and by looking at the rest of this page, Scott will release another "game" to keep his fanbase happy and to milk even more money from them, rather than to grow brain cells, ditch this shit and move on with his fantastically Sperg life that no one will ever give a flying fuck about, since he has contributed nothing but raw Autism in its fullest. And knowing him, he will continue until he does the world a favor and dies.
The plot thickens...
Despite the game racking in loads of views nearly every week on Jewtube and having a large audience on the Internet, Five Nights at Freddy's hasn't even sold that well on Steam. Past the one million view videos that are on the wall with CoD gameplays, unfunny montage parodies, annoying tweens playing Minecraft, and lonely nerds playing modded Skyrim, the game is selling poorly. According to Steam, the peak amount of people playing the game is 1,296, 1,686 for the second game, and 3,184 for the third game. On average, 90-100 are playing the game right now and the weekly peak is 150. Meaning that a good 99% of the fandom hasn't even played the fucking game. Which also proves that most the fans either pirated the game, bought it off IndieDB or just watch Pewdiepie, Markiplier, or every other autistic Let's Player Jew on YouTube play it. In a wise decision, GOG has decided not to distribute this gaming abortion, as even Poles can have standards. Part of the reason the player count is low might also attribute to the unnecessarily high price tag it has. Most players on Steam at least have common sense that it's a fucking ripoff to get a game with 2001 era graphics, no gameplay, and nothing but jump scares for $5, or $7. The game's price increased as a new one came out. If that wasn't enough...
Movie
Yes, you heard right, a game, on Steam, that has sold less than 5,000 copies altogether, has the stalest plot of any game, and has barely been out a year, along with being a shitstain on the already dead horror game franchise, is getting a fucking movie. As if four games released in less than eight months, 40 minutes of gameplay, and a highly autistic fandom is worthy enough of a movie. This proves further how much of a Jew Scott Cawthorn is. Not even Call of Duty got milked this fast, unlike Five Nights at Freddy's, at least it slowly and gradually got milked as time went on, oh and has gameplay to it.
Fandom activity
As with all fandoms, Five Nights at Freddy's has its share of basement dwelling furfaggots that have to make Rule 34 of everything, in fact there is so much Rule 34 of Five Nights at Freddy's, it outmatches brony R34. All of the art consists of Foxy, closely followed by Chica the Chicken and Freddy Fazbear.
It is also common for fans to feel the need self-insert themselves into the world of FNAF, usually through shitty erotic fan fiction and fan art. The various forms of art often depict the fan interacting with the animatronics in wondrous ways. The game's wiki is also full of these people, and roleplayers. They roleplay in the chat 24/7, instead of talking about the actual game. If you question them, you will be scolded by the moderators because "they have the right to RP". Ironically, there is another wiki where you're actually supposed to roleplay, yet it has no users.
You can see their users argue over small things here.
As with the brony fandom, the FNAF fandom has quite a lot of fan-made music, with the most popular song being Five Nights at Freddy's by Israeli YouTube musician The Living Tombstone, Yoav Landau. To save you from having to listen to it, it's basically a heavily auto-tuned mess sung in his retarded Israeli accent, laid over some 90's-ish electronic sounds, with some pseudo-dubstep in the form of annoying high-pitched electronic screeches, and a beat that sounds identical to at least 100 of those heard throughout Yoav's discography. This song also has a follow-up song that sounded nearly identical to its predecessor, besides The Living Tombstone dragging some random girl off the streets of Tel Aviv to do the vocals for him. Another hugely popular FNAF song is Survive the Night, by the brony fandom's Mary Sue, MandoPony. This six-minute-long auditory atrocity just sounds like The Living Tombstone's music on sleeping pills.
Blessedly, since its heyday of 2014, the active Internet fanbase of Five Nights at Freddy's has shrunk significantly, with many of its furfag fans migrating over to Undertale in late 2015.
Video Gallery of Condensed Cholera.
- The "synchronized" singing of bloody murder from landwhales.
Previous Video | Next Video
Gallery of faggotry
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Typical tartlet's take on this game. -
Furfaggot making cosplay of this game a thing. -
Evidence all Five Nights at Freddy's fans are furries.
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Ehh, no. -
Typical FNAF's OC, notice how it is more furry than robotic. -
MSPaint fanart by a weeaboo faggot on DeviantArt. -
How stupid the FNAF fangirls can get. -
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See also
- 13 year old boy - One of the main target demographics
- 16 year old girl - Another one of the main target demographics
- Assassin's Creed - A game already known for being bland and milked.
- Autism - What every FNAF furfan has.
- Bronies - The only fandom on par with this fandom's autism.
- Call of Duty - The former king of milked games.
- Creepypasta
- Cringe
- Don't Hug Me I'm Scared - Five Nights at Freddy's in the form of a video series, at least it has effort put into it.
- Furries - The next main target demographic right after 13-year-old boys and 16-year-old girls.
- Know Your Meme - Where most the bad furry porn goes along with ponies. Current images: Over 7,000.
- Let's Play
- Markiplier - The main contributor and king of FNAF. Beaten every single one of them on the hardest mode to defend his 99-cent paper crown.
- Game Theory - Another thing that got FNAF popular
- Gynophobia - More Steam shit.
- Minecraft - Another game with a highly autistic fanbase made up of similar people.
- Pewdiepie - Disappointed his FNAF fans and pussed out after releasing only one video of him playing FNAF4, making it the most downvoted video in PewDiePie's channel.
- Pizza - Delicious pizza.
- Rebornica
- Sad Satan
- Slender - The 2spooky4u game that only scares 12-year-olds and drunk gamers.
- Steam - Where FNAF comes from.
- Team Fortress 2 - Another game on Steam with a highly autistic and unfunny fandom.
- Tumblr - It's like a second DeviantArt, only with more porn.
- Undertale
- You - For looking at it.
- YouTube - Where the Let's Players upload their FNAF videos.
External links
- Go here to copy the name and then put it into the search bar of kat.ph
- A perfect example of a FNAF fans faggotry
Five Nights at Freddy's now landed a shitload of FNAF porn on Know Your Meme.
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Five Nights at Freddy's is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |
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Five Nights at Freddy's is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article November 14 & 15, 2015 | ||
| Preceded by Joshua Idehen |
Five Nights at Freddy's | Succeeded by Paris Mass Shooting |
| Featured article July 30 and 31, 2015 | ||
| Preceded by Alan Sullivan |
Five Nights at Freddy's | Succeeded by The Daily Show |