- Portals
- The Current Year
- ED in the News
- Admins
- Help ED Rebuild
- Archive
- ED Bookmarklet
- Donate Bitcoin
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.
Bengo: Difference between revisions
imported>Ninja cats |
imported>Oblique fixing template |
||
Line 42: | Line 42: | ||
==Fluffy Causes ALL My Misfortune!== | ==Fluffy Causes ALL My Misfortune!== | ||
{{ | {{needsmore|screencaps of Fluffy telling Bengo the truth}} | ||
[[Image:Bengo-blames-fluffy.jpg|left|thumb|Curiously, Bengo leaves all the "trolling" comments from Fluffy intact, but not Fluffy's actual comments. [[bullshit|Hmm...]] ]] | [[Image:Bengo-blames-fluffy.jpg|left|thumb|Curiously, Bengo leaves all the "trolling" comments from Fluffy intact, but not Fluffy's actual comments. [[bullshit|Hmm...]] ]] | ||
Recently, '''Bengo''' has begun to realize the true secret of [[E-penis|webcomics success]], which is to shit on other [[Aspie|webcomic creators]] of even lower quality than his own shit. To this end, he has begun blaming [http://beesbuzz.biz/d/ Fluffy] for being the sole person responsible for creating [[Sockpuppet|dozens of identities of various nationalities]] in order to slander Bengo and be the source of all the comments on his blog that are not [[Narcissistic personality disorder|kissing his ass]]. | Recently, '''Bengo''' has begun to realize the true secret of [[E-penis|webcomics success]], which is to shit on other [[Aspie|webcomic creators]] of even lower quality than his own shit. To this end, he has begun blaming [http://beesbuzz.biz/d/ Fluffy] for being the sole person responsible for creating [[Sockpuppet|dozens of identities of various nationalities]] in order to slander Bengo and be the source of all the comments on his blog that are not [[Narcissistic personality disorder|kissing his ass]]. |
Revision as of 05:59, 5 November 2011
Bengo is a webcomic creator and furry who has a rare combination of intelligence and stupidity:
- He's smart enough to call a spade black person and realize Scott Kurtz is a dick.
- He's also dumb enough to actually call Scott Kurtz a dick to his face.
Bengo keeps up a webcomics news blog, The Floating Lightbulb, which is where he cultivates the majority of his webcomic drama by claiming that everyone who currently enjoys any financial success in webcomics is either scamming people out of their money or lying about how successful they actually are, how Twitter will never survive (three years after Twitter started, of course, which means it's already lasted longer than most webcomics), and when all else fails, pointing out how all the other people trolling him are even less successful webcomic artists than he is.
He also had two webcomics:
- Lil' Nyet, an unfunny comic about a devil communist cat.
- Scratchin' Post, an even unfunnier comic that Bengo has supposedly worked several years out into the future on, which makes sense because the drawings are so shitty they must have taken no time at all to draw.
Of course, like most webcomics, Bengo has now up and quit, after realizing Nobody Cares.
Everything You've Read About Webcomics is a Lie!
Bengo spends most of his time telling everyone who'll listen to him about how all the books and resources about webcomics, especially the book How to Make Webcomics (co-written by, of course, Scott Kurtz), is written on a shaky business model that overestimates how many people will actually want to buy stupid shit just because it's made by a webcomic. (In other words, you shouldn't read the book because it will give you the idea that your shitty art is actually worth something).
Working off the success of this fundamental truth, he then goes on to expose all the "successful" webcomics artists and demonstrate how they either became successful by lying, cheating, and sleeping their way to the top, or if he can't find any evidence of the latter, he will accuse them of lying about their success and using their trust funds to hide this. Never mind that he can't even produce screencaps to prove any of his statements....
—Bengo, having no concept of how business gets done |
Even when presented with evidence from the creators themselves, Bengo refuses to believe any of their statistics if he doesn't like those particular creators, insisting on evidence from Google or Alexa (which is often delayed and only available to the most popular comics in the first place)
—Bengo |
And of course, when all else fails...
—Bengo, Ragging on Octopus Pie some more |
And of course, his own sense on what actually passes for webcomics advice is skewed, as he originally thought this article of webcomics advice was serious business, before being told by several people it was actually a spoof.
BAWWW I'm Leaving Webcomics 4-Ever!
—Bengo, [1] |
Bengo, for all his love of stirring up drama, has tried to "leave the webcomics scene" several times, without of course realizing that the sheer level of drama he causes makes him one of its premier attractions.
To say the least, this lasted all of a day before he went on another Scott Kurtz Tirade, and he hasn't shut up yet.
— Gregori |
Fluffy Causes ALL My Misfortune!
This article needs moar screencaps of Fluffy telling Bengo the truth. You can help by adding moar screencaps of Fluffy telling Bengo the truth. |
Recently, Bengo has begun to realize the true secret of webcomics success, which is to shit on other webcomic creators of even lower quality than his own shit. To this end, he has begun blaming Fluffy for being the sole person responsible for creating dozens of identities of various nationalities in order to slander Bengo and be the source of all the comments on his blog that are not kissing his ass.
The truth is, of course, that almost everyone else in webcomics either hates Bengo outright, considers him a crackpot at best, or is only staying on his good side in order to obtain maximum lulz, so it's not hard to believe that all those dozens of identities of various nationalities could actually be... dozens of actual RL people who don't like Bengo!
Naturally, any and all attempts Fluffy makes to clear their name on Bengo's site get deleted, so if you happen to see Fluffy's comments on Bengo's blog... please, screencap the hell out of that shit! Fluffy deserves to be heard for the sake of the lulz!
—Bengo, who deletes Fluffy's comments |
—Bengo, thinking he's some sort of supervillain |
Gone for Good?
—Bengo, doing a classic flounce |
External Links
- The Floating Lightbulb, Bengo's main blog
- Lil' Nyet, one of Bengo's furry comics (which is unfunny)
- Scratchin' Post, Bengo's other furry comic (which is even more unfunny)
- Tilting At Lightbulbs, an ongoing analysis of Bengo's actions
- The frumph file, a catalog of Bengo's interactions with Frumph (includes many links to even more hilarity)
Bengo is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |