Violet Blue

Manolith recently picked the 12 hottest geek girls of 2009. Guess who's conspicuously missing from the list? Hint: It's not Veronica Belmont...

Violet Blue, in repose. Also, flapjack tits.

Violet Blue (real name Wendy Sullivan, born September 22, 1970) is a fetish model who exists only to complain about straight males on the Internets and take up space on Sfgate.com's front page and whose eyebrows could not be worse if she were trying to impersonate John Waters. In her lulz-worthy column she describes in great detail that the Internets are serious business and absolutely everything in the world has to do with sex. Whether it is the firing of eight US attorneys for political reasons, or her friend reading HORRIBLE THINGS ON THE INTERNET DIRECTED AT HER, it can all be explained by sexual. fucking. repression. by. straight. fucking. men. who. are. always. white.

Fighting The (straight) Man

Violet Blue believes that attacks on female bloggers are always the work of straight men, and equates such online attacks to the IRL murder of transsexual teenagers by homophobic spics in an East Bay ghetto called Newark, which is so fucking outlandish and what that it makes those who believe HIV does not cause AIDS seem rather reasonable. (Ironically, she tends to glorify violence when it suits her.) This belief, however, will not cause her tits to magically unsag themselves, pay for much-needed dermabrasion, or wash away the creepiness of her Crash-obsessed teched-out sex life.

While not giving feminism a bad name, and fetish modeling a horrid face, Violet Blue spends her time not disclosing the fact that the people she defends in her SFgate column and her blog are actually close personal friends.

Everyone sucks but me

Gross. Violet Blue is such a slut that she needs a diagram to figure out who she's fucked

Upon observation of the incidents in question and the circumstances leading up to them, it becomes quite clear what the real issue is. Externalization. These women are not being targeted due to their gender, sexual orientation, or any other sensational bullshit reason. Every person that endeavors to make their life public and seeks the spotlight is going to receive negative feedback and some downright mean comments. The problem we're seeing here is the result of the reaction to this stimuli. Rather than owning up to the fact that they are targeted for being untalented and completely useless parasites, these women fabricate reasons that are sure to gain sympathy for their cause. This is of course similar to the way they gained what little popularity and recognition they enjoy today. They choose to blow the entire incident way out of proportion hoping to increase the amount of link backs to their blog. Unfortunately, this tactic often works a little too well, and they are targeted by masters of ruin ordained by Christ to root out these cancerous elements in our society.

"Helping" her "friends"

Violet Blue is a high-ranking member of a mafia-style organization, if by "mafia-style" you mean "jealous, backstabbing, and perpetually butthurt." As a notable female blogger, she is forced to pay lip service to the façade of the loving and supportive sisterhood amongst her grrrlfriends. The ugly truth is that these bitches fucking hate each other, which is understandable, considering that their lives revolve around internet drama. Every so often, one of them starts gurgling that she was almost raped when someone makes a comment referencing the fact that they are unfunny, untalented, and unattractive. All of them immediately start blogging, linking, and name-dropping like crazy, because Jesus Christ, they exhausted their last drop of genuine creativity at least 100 posts ago. This is where Violet Blue gets more attention for herself while subtly planting an e-dagger right in her "friend's" kidney.

Case in point: When adorkablegrrl, a humorously malformed and maladjusted lackey of hers baaawwed over some egregiously trivial bullshit, she wrote a column about it. She got people to generally agree that spammers are bad, and that anonymous is truly a heartless asshole, but all anyone wanted to talk about was the fact that adorkablegrrl came across as the whiniest, stupidest, most self-absorbed loser ever to be almost raped by the internet. It's flawlessly written, leading you to the inevitable conclusion that Violet Blue is a sex-positive feminist who's always down for her homegirls; and that adorkablegrrl is a crybaby who needs to shut the fuck up.

Unpublished on BoingBoing

DO NOT WANT

In the latest internet shitstorm to captivate bloggers everywhere and bore the absolute crap out of everyone else, Boing Boing deleted fucking everything related to Violet Blue. All fine and good you say? Well, they had to go and gay it up by calling it an "unpublishing," in tones best reserved for sipping tea with pinky elevated. The stupid thing is that the banhammer actually got dropped over a year ago, so why people suddenly started giving a shit I have no idea. Apparently, "Violet behaved in a way that made us reconsider whether we wanted to lend her any credibility or associate with her." That's as much as these fags are willing to say on the subject, and the possibility of missing out on delicious drama has got people absolutely frothing at the mouth.

The way Violet Blue is massaging the situation has been described (accurately) as "little-girl-lost," i.e. lots of hand-wringing "I don't even know what I did, they won't even talk to me, I didn't do anything wrong" bullshit. That shit is working, too, because fuck Godwin's Law, Boing Boing hit the Fifty Hitler Post by comment number ten. It got real stupid in there with all the Stasi/Gestapo/Iron Guard/RIAA comparisons, not to mention the fucking ton of morons who insisted on making the same reference to 1984 over and over and over again. Their moderator tried to calm things down, but was was completely surprised when that didn't work. People got so butthurt over this I can't even believe it, and the self-righteous prissiness of all involved is equally astounding. The one thing that unifies everyone is their desire to know what soured the relationship between these titans of posturing and pomposity.

This has all happened before

Can you picture this guy fucking like a champ?

First of all, this isn't a unique or isolated event. Violet Blue has a long history of involving herself with various groups that eventually see the need to kick her out, remove all references to her, and then try to pretend she never existed. There was a somewhat amusing edit war on her TOW page over her connection to and supposed major role in the industrial art group, Survival Research Labs- a claim she seems bizarrely interested in promoting. For extra lolz, check out the talk page and witness her main defender, the barely literate Wikiwikimoore being outed as her boyfriend Jonathan Moore. For maximum lulz, witness his attempt to come clean later, after he's already been exposed: "Disclaimer: I am close fried of hers." This guy must fuck like a champ, because he sure as hell didn't seduce her with his brilliant mind. Then again his attraction might just be his huge, throbbing, purple trust fund.

Violet has an extremely lulzy post on her blog where she outlines the lesbian breakup with SRL. It's full of pretty pictures and butthurt, and she whines in a sad and confused little voice about how everyone is yelling at her for no reason. You see, those poor dweebs were dumb enough to hand her the controls to a giant fucking robot, AND trusted her to pilot it at an outdoor event. You wouldn't even know that anything had gone wrong from her self-serving description of events, but we can go ahead and read between the lines.

	“	The big ball of cardboard caught on fire and the wind was unpredictably strong . . . I decided to push the ball around, and then take a "stroll" through the big wooden house prop. I had fun walking my machine all over the parking lot to try and show it off to the whole sprawling audience.	„

Violet wows the crowd with her leet skillz.

Wait a second, did you just say that you "decided" to combine flaming cardboard, wood, and strong winds? It takes a highly refined level of stupidity not to anticipate the obvious result. A bystander got burned and had to have her medical bills paid, plus be compensated for "pain and suffering." Violet also fails to mention that San Mateo County stuck Survivor Research Labs with a $6,660 bill for repair and cleanup. She, of course, does not remotely consider herself responsible, and neglects to inform that the group is now begging on PayPal for $$$ to cover the cost of the debacle. SRL's response to Violet? GTFO.

In case you're wondering how she became part of such an exclusive and admired group, the answer is simple. She started fucking a senior member named Todd Blair, going so far as to marry and divorce his significantly-older ass. If that wasn't enough of a disaster for this poor guy, yet another SRL show went horribly wrong in October of last year. In a tragic mixup of the put shoe on head meme, they went and put forklift on head. Best wishes to the formerly creative and artistic gentleman, and here's to the hope that he can eventually relearn how to chew solid food and form simple sentences. In deference to the solemn events, Violet refused the opportunity to twist a tragedy into a forum for airing out old grievances.

	“	I wasn't at the show, but I can't stop thinking things would have gone differently had I been there.	„
	—Violet Blue, taking the high road

Damn. No wonder they don't like her anymore.

In an interesting coincidence, Violet Blue once enjoyed a sexual relationship with Xeni Jardin, who, when not on the clock as a "gendertastic sex-robot space princess from the future," is one of the four main editors of BoingBoing. The peculiarities of their mating ritual are likely beyond the understanding of mere mortals like you or me, but they do fit Violet's mercenary attitude towards sex and blogging. Depending on how she views the power dynamic, she will either attempt to fuck something or treat it with rudeness and contempt. After successfully transmitting her legion of STDs, she engaged in her typical compulsive behavior, which has been (accurately) described as "desperate coattail-riding." In a terminal case of unwarranted self-importance, she started clawing her way to the foreground a little too brazenly. By the time she started referring to herself as "the fifth Boing Boinger," Xeni realized that she had been screwed in every sense of the word.

Hypocrisy, thy name is Violet

DO WANT

This might just be about another butthurt lesbian breakup, but there's an added element of motivational nerd rage. You see, BoingBoing is death on the whole bullshit "that's mine, it's copyright, you can't use it" games people try to play whenever they get their feelings hurt. Even people who already knew that Violet Blue is a liar and a hypocrite were surprised when she launched a genuine federal lolsuit against the porn star Violet Blue for trademark infringement. Even though her doppelganger was humping on camera a year before her first book was published, even though she only trademarked her stupid name in 2007, and even though Violet Blue IS a made-up porn-style name, she still seems way more hard-nosed and serious about this than you might expect from the proud author of how-to guides to butt-fucking and dick-sucking. Never mind that the porn star is out of the business, has two kids, and is basically broke, she still wants "recovery of Defendants' profits," "trebled monetary damages," and "an award of Plaintiff's attorney's fees and costs." How's that for fucked up? For someone who supposedly champions the rights of sex workers to go and do their dirty business in peace, and who has the gall to call her stupid column "Open Source Sex," she seems more than willing to shit all over everything she publicly espouses at the drop of a hat. I can't believe that she's still succeeding in her role as the poor little victim here, and that people are acting like BoingBoing did WTC by kicking her to the curb.

• NOTE: Violet Blue's successful attempt to turn Boingboing's users against Boingboing's editors is an example of a trolling technique known as Steering.

• NOTE 2: The other Violet Blue now goes by the porn name "No-Name Jane", because she's too stupid to think of a new one, and her whole life revolves around being butthurt over getting bitch-slapped for her lack of creativity.

On Wikipedia

Gg, Violet.

Anyone as interested in self-promotion as Violet Blue is bound to end up with drama on TOW, and anyone as notable tends to track her own shit in the door with her. Last year, while compulsively Googling herself, she became most displeased with the state of her Wikipedia page. Instead of a Stalinist monument to her greater glory, it was the typical boring piece of shit that Wikipedo rules require. Rather than dirty her own hands with vanity edits, she issued a call to arms to her own personal army. As soon as her meatpuppets had anointed her as master robot fabricator and techno-artist supreme at Survival Research Labs, the first shots of an edit war started flying downrange. Most of these bitch-fests are strangers arguing over Naruto fandom, but this one was between people that know and hate each other IRL. Ninavizz was chief among the warriors defending SRL from the taint of Violet's involvement, and was quick to scrub out any references to the group. Fortunately, WikiWikimoore was there to plug that same shit right back in. Coincidentally, Nina Alter is a contributing artist at SRL that Violet mentions several times while "blogging my way out of all this pain" after another chapter in a long series of unpublishings. Apparently, Ninavizz was the ringleader of a vicious hate group that somehow objected to Violet turning an art demonstration into a fiery apocalypse.

The dynamic duo explains how editing Wikipedia = stalking.

In another coincidence, Wikiwikimoore turned out to be Violet Blue's long-time boyfriend, i.e. the guy that sits there and takes pictures while she and Xeni do the monster mash. Nina and Jonathan had previously exchanged flames over the SRL issue; having taken CS3, he could tell from some of the pixels who it really was. This allowed Violet to use her "Sexual Privacy Online" panel at SXSW 2008 to publicly out her as a psycho vanity-edit-reverting stalker. Because everyone who disagreed with him was clearly a Ninavizz sock puppet, Wikiwikimoore demanded the admins take action, and was promptly lolled out of internet court.

Jonathan Moore, whose slavish devotion greatly pleases his mistress, kept butting heads on TOW with a user named BenBurch. This guy took offense at having his boner killed by Violet's horrible fetish photography, and retaliated by continually reverting her boyfriend's compulsive apple-polishing. For committing the heinous crime of disagreeing with her online, Violet Blue has petitioned the IRL cops for an IRL restraining order against a Wikipedia editor. Please to be ignoring the fact that David "Ben" Burch is a 60 year old man currently living over 1,680 miles away, she is still asking her local court to declare him an immediate threat to her physical safety. She doesn't actually expect him to show up at her door gripping a samurai sword and a ball-peen hammer; she just wants him to shut the fuck up.

Interestingly enough, the terms of the order would forbid him from doing jack shit to her precious fucking Wikipedia page. If BenBurch doesn't care to attend court proceedings on the other side of the fucking country, a default judgment will be entered in Violet's favor. To keep Ninavizz from feeling jealous about Ben's special treatment, Violet served up some love for her, too. Her specific requests for protection were sloppily redacted, so we can see that she wants to keep Nina from badmouthing her on the SRL email list, as well as "not edit or cause others to edit the wikipedia page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violet_Blue." She also had her attorney, who is getting rich off of Violet's appetite for drama and frivolous lawsuits, check the boxes asserting the fact that "The Order is based on stalking," and "The Order is based on a credible threat of violence." After Valleywag broke the story and everyone lolled and called her a bitch, she popped up in the comments section to burble the following:

	“	this is not a lawsuit. it is a summons for hearing for a restraining order for harassment. I highly recommend that you also run the rest of the documents in this packet, which show that the harassment extends to other sites and personal threats via email. it's all in the court documents, the above of which are only the first few pages. as you know, the Court will review the evidence from both parties, and decide.	„

Considering that Violet always trumpets out any "threat" towards her like a woolly mammoth, the fact that she's remained silent until being exposed leads ED to call bullshit. As she says, it's only a summons where the court will review the one-sided evidence from the only party able to appear, and then rubber stamp a judgment on her behalf. She's not some defenseless little girl that got victimized by big, bad BoingBoing, she's a freaking 800-pound gorilla willing to sue at the drop of a hat. She got kicked off the site for being a bitch, and now she's using the legal system to bully her critics into remaining silent. BenBurch promptly shit his pants at this latest development, and immediately committed justifiable wikicide. Wikiwikimoore got banned for outrageous faggotry, though his out-of-control dyslexia should ensure a particularly humorous onslaught of sock puppets. No word from Ninavizz, though the folks at Wikipedia Review have begun nosing around the issue.

And a Loser...

UPDATE: Violet Blue loses her lolsuit against BenBurch!

See Also

• BoingBoing
• Feminism
• Subhuman Filth
• Penis envy
• BoingBoing vs Violet Blue: Strap-on Smackdown!
• records of Violet's weird, crazy lolsuit
• Internet model

External Links

• Her man hating column
• Her personal website
• Hate site about her friend which is OMG SOOO MEAN
• Adorkablegrrl's blog
• Account on TOW and contributions
• Account of "boyfriend" on TOW and contributions
• Pertinent comments from her friend

Violet Blue is part of a series on Sex Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.

Violet Blue is part of a series on Whores Visit the Whores Portal for complete coverage.