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{{crap}}
{{spoiler|Ragyo Kiruin is Ryuuko's actual mother, Satsuki is not evil and wants to pwn Ragyo, and Ruuko is not a human but a fiber monster. And yes, [[Megaman dies in the end|Senketsu dies in the end]]}}
{{pixplz}}
{{spoiler|HOLY HELL MAKO'S MOM IS THE ONLY STRAIGHT FEMALE IN THIS MAGICAL GIRL ANIME!!! HOLY SHIT NUI KILLED RYUKO'S DAD!! OH FUCK MIKISUGI IS ACTUALLY A NAKED ARMY GENERAL!!! OH SHIT REVOCS IS ACTUALLY A COVER TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! WOWZERS LIFE FIBERS ARE ACTUALLY ALIEN PARASITES AND CHOSE US HUMANS SO WE COULD BE EVOLVED AND SERVED FOR A BIG FUN ALIEN LUNCH!! HOLY SHIT THERE ARE LIFE FIBERS IN EVERYONE'S CLOTHES!! RAGYO ACTUALLY SERVES A BIG BALL OF ALIEN WOOL AND PLANS TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD STARTING WITH A SPORTS AND CULTURE FESTIVAL IN JAPAN!11! OH MAN SATSUKI IMPALES HER OWN MOTHER WITH HER SWORD AND DECLARES WAR ON HER BECAUSE RAGYO FINGERED SATSUKI IN HER PERIOD!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG RYUKO IS SATSUKI'S LITTLE SISTER WHO DIED AFTER A LIFE FIBER EXPERIMENT WHEN SHE WAS LITTLE!!!!!!!! HOLY NIGGER MEAT RYUKO AND RAGYO HAVE BEEN FUSED WITH LIFE FIBERS!!!!!11! HOLY PEDOBEAR GAMAGORI IS A PEDOPHILE AND WANTS TO FUCK MAKO! OM/B/ RAGYO HAS AN INCEST FETISH AND WANTS TO BDSM RAPE SATSUKI!!!!!!!!11!1!! WT/A/ RAGYO AND NUI HAD JUNKETSU MIND RAPE RYUKO AND NOW SHE'S ON HER PERIOD AND WANTS TO KILL EVERYONE!!!!1!!!!!!! LM/X/O RYUKO AND SATSUKI SWITCHED KAMUIS AND NUI HAS BOTH SCISSOR BLADES!!!!1! YES YES YES YES! RYUKO CUT OFF NUI'S ARMS!!!! NO NO NO NO! RAGYO GAVE NUI NEW ARMS EVEN THOUGH HER BODY SUPPOSEDLY REJECTS FOREIGN LIFE FIBERS!!!OMG!!!! NUI BECAMES RAGYOS CLOTHES!!! OMG OMG OMG!!! THEY ROCKET UP TO THE SKY TO DIRECTLY TRANSMIT SIGNAL!!! OOOOOMMMMGGGGG!!!111!! WHOLE TEAM ON THE HONNOUJI ACADEMY GIVES THEIR POWER TO RYUKO AND SENKETSU!!!111 THEY SKY ROCKET TO ATMOSPHERE!!1 THEY DEFEAT RAGYO FOR SOME BULLSHIT REASON!! EVERTHING ENDS UP IN GROUP ORGY!!!111!!11
<br>
<center>{{RainbowSlant|SENKETSU DIES!!!!!!!}}</center>
Others are all fine|spoiler}}


[[File:Edg, Edge and Edgy.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Now starring Ryuuko Matoi!]]
{{quote|How does it feel? The pleasure of being enveloped by Junketsu.|Fuckin' Japan making everything all weird }}
Kill la Kill (キルラキル Kiru ra Kiru?) is an edgy Magical Girl Animu made by [[Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann|Trigger]], who has a blood fetish. It's basically [[Evangelion]] and [[Dragon Ball Z]] combined. The plot is a prequel to [[Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt]], related to FLCL, complete with [[Goku]] uniforms. It was hailed by [[a/|/a/]] as the saviour of animu, but it turned out to be nothing special.


== Plot ==
[[File:GRRR.jpg|250px|thumb|Kill la Kill is regarded for its ulterior art style.]]


Ryuuko Matoi carries a big weapon around shaped like the half of a pair of scissors. She's looking for the woman with the other half, who killed her father. Satsuki Kiryuuin, student council president of Honnouji Academy, is said to know the woman's identity, but keeps messing with her so, Ryuuko transfers there. Students who arrive at the school and suck the elite's cocks well will receive a special "Goku Uniform" some kind of Power Suit, which Satsuki uses to rule the school with an iron fist.  
'''Kill la Kill''' [[moonspeak|(キルラキル Kiru ra Kiru)]] is an [[edgy]] Magical Girl Animu made by [[Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann|Trigger]], who has a [[PMS|period]] fetish (OH GOD WHY?). It's basically [[Gurren Lagann]] and [[Dragon Ball Z]] combined, or what [[Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt]] would look like with a PG13 rating and not a hint of originality. The plot is related to FLCL, complete with [[Goku]] uniforms. It was hailed by [[a/|/a/]] as the savior of animu, but it turned out to be nothing special. Instead we just got more cheap fap material posing as some deep and poetic story that would last the ages.
 
 
== [[Plot]] ==
[[Image:CompellingStory.jpg|thumb|Tasteful female empowerment.]]
A compelling story of [[feminism|empowerment]] and vengeance. Ryuko Matoi is an [[in the kitchen|upstanding girl]] willing to fight in the face of adversity to seek out who [[Star Wars|killed her father]] years ago. She is forced into the [[ass|evil, pitiful bowels]] of Honnouji Academy where she fights off [[rich and beautiful|evil prep students]] while finishing her homework in time for her next class. With her trusty friend Mako Mankanshoku and her [[dog]] Guts, they set off once again to save the world from evil, greed, male homosexuality, the Pokémon League, and [[Bush|conservatives who hate sexy Japanese cartoon boobies]].
 
Nothing to see here. Like every goddamn anime made <s>after 2005</s> ever, Kill la Kill is composed of fanservice, ass shots, BEWBS, a superficial heap of shit plot to make you forget that it's solely fapbait, and moar fanservice. Sex sells, and if it bleeds it leads! Who needs a compelling story anyway? [[fact|It's not like the human race is heading towards a higher plane of existence and reason]].


== Life Fibers ==
== Life Fibers ==


Life Fibers are the main plot device for this action/[[Hentai|ecchi]] [[Lie|work of art]]. They are essentially ancient fabric parasites that 'chose' humans for having the best nervous system at the time when they invaded, advancing our evolution to the point of dominating the planet (a strange side-effect of being the host of a [[Welfare|PARASITE]]). Unfortunately people like [[Down Syndrome|John Langdon Down]] and [[Aspergers|Hans Asperger]] discovered that these Life Fibers didn't [[Immigrant|leech off of]] all the humans.
[[File:Edg, Edge and Edgy.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Proposed crossover with Dork Sanic and other autism-inducing shite.]]
 
Life Fibers are <s>cheap tacky fanservice for 15 year-old basement dwellers to schlock off to</s> the deep and intricate main plot device for this tasteful [[Lie|garbage]]. They are essentially ancient fabric parasites that 'chose' humans for having the best nervous system at the time when they invaded, advancing our evolution to the point of dominating the planet (a strange side-effect of being the host of a [[Welfare|PARASITE]]). Unfortunately people like [[Down Syndrome|John Langdon Down]] and [[Aspergers|Hans Asperger]] discovered that these Life Fibers didn't [[Immigrant|leech off of]] all the humans. Probably because they don't even exist in this [[autistic|fantastic]] cartoon's universe.


The only people with any clue of these fibers are the [[Wincest|Kiryuin clan]], Isshin Matoi, [[DO WANT|Nudist Beach]], and Ryuko Matoi.
The only people with any clue of these fibers are the [[Wincest|Kiryuin clan]], Isshin Matoi, [[DO WANT|Nudist Beach]], and Ryuko Matoi.


Life Fibers are critical in making these originally named Goku Uniforms; these Goku Uniforms have 5 known forms:
Life Fibers are critical in making these originally named Goku Uniforms; these Goku Uniforms have 5 known forms:
* 1-Star - Uniforms of 10% Life Fibers, all who wear them become Life Fiber Nazis who all look the same waiting for Ryuko to rape them with her Scissor Blade.
* 1-Star - Uniforms of 10% Life Fibers, all who wear them become Life Fiber Nazis who all look like standard mooks despite the fact they're supposed to be fucking students.


* 2-Star - Uniforms of 20% Life Fibers, all who wear them become [[Justin Bieber|Alfluenzic]] smug retards who secretly want Ryuko and Nui to [[Scissoring|Scissor]].
* 2-Star - Uniforms of 20% Life Fibers, all who wear them become [[Justin Bieber|Alfluenzic]] smug retards who secretly want Ryuko and Nui to [[Scissoring|Scissor]].
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== Characters ==
== Characters ==


*[[TITS OR GTFO|'''Ryuuko Matoi-Kiryuuin''']] - A 17-year old-girl and the main protagonist who's also a tomboy that isn't feminine. Wants to find out who killed her daddy by challenging Satsuki, and ends up wearing a latex Power Suit while fighting off hackers, monkeys, [[bitches and whores]], mummies, and cannon fodder. Somehow also knows how to drive motorcycles around like a badass even though she's 17 years old. Ragyo ripped out her heart at one point to reveal that she's her should-be-dead daughter.
<center>[[File:Kill la Kill Orgy Fixed.jpg|700px|center|There is a perfectly logical reason for this.]]<br>
 
'''Kill la Kill gives us a [[naruto|wide and diverse array of characters]] not only oozing in [[lie|originality]] but also in [[cum|many other regards]].'''</center>
*[[Dracula|'''Senketsu''']] - A living and breathing Evangelion sailor uniform Ryuko finds beneath her house. It grants her temporary power until she passes out. Is actually an alien battlesuit made by Ryuuko's dad to fight against REVOCS.
[[File:Ragyo incest1.gif|thumb|220px|[[Wincest|Remember, this is canon]]]]
 
[[File:Mako Mankanshoku.gif|thumb|left|220px|A typical <big><big>'''HAAALLELUJAH'''</big></big> moment]]
*[[Mute list|'''Junketsu''']] - Another Sailor Moon suit that NEVER speaks. EVER. Riders of the Kill La Kill Hype Train have speculated that he is a demon and a pervert. It was supposed to be Satsuki's wedding dress that would enslave her to clothing but instead it was her fanservice battle dress that enslaved Ryuko to clothing while triggering 1000 orgasms per second only to be ripped apart in hot-blood.
[[File:Ragyo incest2.gif|thumb|200px|More incestuous molesting]]
 
[[File:Kaneo Takarada rape.gif|thumb|left|220px|The [[Jew]] gets [[Asking for it|assraped]]]]
*[[Lesbian|'''Mako Mankanshoku''']] - [[Poor|Mako]] is Ryuko's [[only|best]] friend who lives in the ghetto with all the other [[Nobody|No-Stars]]. Her family consists of a perverted botch doctor, a perverted pick-pocket little brother ([[Fact|because all pre-pubescents have sexual drives in anime]]), a [[Bestiality|perverted]] [[Bestiality|pet]] [[Bestiality|dog]], and a female who spends all her time [[in the kitchen]] cooking [[Shit|mystery food]]. Her power is to put a stop to any fight by smoking crack, regardless of how serious it is.
[[File:Harime Nui did it all.gif|thumb|220px|She did it for the lulz]]
 
*[[Premenstrual Tension|'''Satsuki Kiryuuin:''']] She's the main antagonist, 18 year old and president of the student council at Honnouji Academy. Has bigass eyebrows, a manface, but also a GOD [[Ass|ASS]]. She generally hangs around with the next four characters. 
 
* [[Pedobear|'''Ira Gamagori''']] - Leader of the school's disciplinary committee who's into [[BSDM|bondage]]. His actual size changes time to time, and might be into Mako.
 
* [[Guy Shishioh|'''Uzu Sanageyama''']] - Leader of the school's athletics committee. Fights with a bamboo stick and his Goku uniform is a huge mecha, but he always loses to everyone, so [[retard|he stabbed himself in the eyes to see more and keeps losing anyways]].
 
* '''Hooka Inumuta''' - Leader of the school's information and strategy committee who used to be a [[1337]] h4x0rr who finished [[Computer Science III]] cum laude and fucked with stocks [[lulz|for teh lulz]] until the REVOCS [[Party Van]] paid a visit. Now spends his days trying to analyze data with his [[Gameboy]] emulator, and likes to [[gay|probe]] things.


* '''Nonon Jakuzure''' - Leader of the school's non-athletics committee. Controls an entire orchestra, and only plays [[mu/|obviously inferior music]]. Has a voice that makes [[neckbeards]] cream theirselves. One time at band camp, she stuck a flute in her pussy.


* '''Aikurou Mikisugi''' - Ryuko's and Honnouji Academy's only teacher, is a [[You|smelly shaggy sleazebag doing jobs for slave wages so he can pay rent and precious anime figurines]] who also [[stalker|observes]] Ryuko's progress and was the one who led her to Senketsu. He's actually a [[faggot|FABULOUS]] nudist army leader. His crotch and nipples emanate purple light, as if he wasn't FABULOUS enough.
*'''[[MATOI RYUUKO!!!|Ryuuko Matoi-Kiryuuin]]''' - [[16 year old girl|17 year-old girl]] and strong independent womyn. Shows up at the Academy, challenges Satsuki to a fight almost immediately and somehow winds up as a student. A perfect female heroine to guide us from the patriarchy.


[[File:NO MOM NO alt.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Canon.]]
*'''[[An Hero|Senketsu]]''' - A living and breathing Evangelion sailor uniform Ryuko finds beneath her house. It grants her temporary power until she [[rape|passes out]]. Is actually an alien made by Ryuuko's dad, Isshin, to fight against REVOCS. Spoiler!


* [[Rainbow Dash|'''Ragyou Kiryuuin''']] - Satsuki's mom, part Life Fiber, and also the head honcho of REVOCS, the company that produced the clothing you are wearing right now and whose employees are fabric fetishists. She's an incestuous lesbian psychopath.
*'''[[Mute list|Junketsu]]''' - Another Sailor Moon suit that NEVER speaks. EVER. Riders of the Kill La Kill Hype Train have speculated that he is a demon pervert. It was supposed to be Satsuki's wedding dress that would enslave her to clothing but instead it was her fanservice battle dress that enslaved Ryuko to clothing while keeping her in a perpetual orgasm.


* [[Kawaii|'''Nui Harime''']] - REVOCS bigshot and overall smug [[cunt]]. She's that kind of person who can kill [[Holocaust|6 gorillion]] [[Jews]] with a purple half of a scissor blade and a smile on her face within 24 minutes. Somehow managed to lose her left eye when killing Ryuko's dad, and keeps fucking with Ryuko because of that. Can destroy Goku suits in one strike, even Satsuki feared her. Late in the series Ryuko snatches her scissor and uses them both to cut off her arms generating [[lulz]] on a galactic level and the rare kind of fanservice(Giving the fans something else they want) considering that nobody likes her. It's revealed that her body will reject any and all foreign life-fibers [[WAT|but Ragyou was still able to restore her arms and she can wear the Original Life Fiber]].
*'''[[Lesbian|Mako Mankanshoku]]''' - Ryuko's only friend. Her power is to put a stop to any fight by smoking crack and being the most definite example of an airhead known to exist. She owns a dog named Guts who derps around all day, aimlessly hoping to be the next wacky side-kick.


* '''Isshin Matoi''' - Ryuko's dad, used to be known as [[Megaman|Dr. Wily]] until he gave up on trying to taking over the world. Discovered that REVOCS was trying to take over the world using alien wires, so he founded his own group of armed [[Hippie|nudists]] and made a slutty sailor uniform for her daughter because she's The One™. Eventually got killed by Nui.
*'''[[KIRYUUIN SATSUKI!!!|Satsuki Kiryuuin]]''' - the main antagonist, 18 year old and president of the student council at Honnouji Academy. Has bigass eyebrows, a manface, and a [[DAT ASS|HUGE FUCKING ASS]]. She's actually Ryuuko's sister: spoiler.


* [[God|'''Shinra-Kouketsu''']] - The [[powerword|Ultimate Kamui]] that Ragyo had Nui and the Honouji Academy's Sewing club make. It's the only Kamui that doesn't have a face and it's fucking gigantic; until it activates. Then it grows several pairs of eyes and has the 'Absolute Domination' ability to deactivate any and all life fibers that dare to oppose it. Oh and it's a sin to threaten it. In other words Shinra Kouketsu is God.
* '''[[Pedobear|Ira Gamagori]]''' (or rather, '''''[[Homo]]'''gori'') - [[Animu Archetypes#The Pissed Off Guy (POG)|He is visibly angry 99% of the time and yells a lot]]. Original as can be.


== YouTube ==
* '''[[King of Braves GaoGaiGar|Uzu Sanageyama]]''' - the guy who voluntarily [[zalgo|blinded]] himself after losing a fight to Ryuuko, which made him super fast and sensitive. Again, no archetypes in this series. None at all.


{{Videoframe|vf|{{roundy|.9em}}background-color:white;background-color:white;border:.5em solid lightgray;margin:0 auto 1em auto;|font-weight:bold;
* '''[[Nerd|Hooka Inumuta]]''' - Leader of the school's information and strategy committee who used to be a [[1337]] h4x0rr who finished [[Computer Science III]] cum laude and fucked with stocks [[lulz|for teh lulz]] until the REVOCS [[Party Van]] paid a visit. Now spends his days trying to analyze data with his [[Gameboy]] emulator.


|<youtube>Xjx6Az4LTno</youtube>
* '''[[Kawaii|Nonon Jakuzure]]''' - A kawaii uguu monkey girl with a disgusting grumpy voice that resembles the sound produced by nails grinding through a chalkboard. She was the school band leader, despite conducting nothing but terrible faggoty trite in every scene she's featured in. Supposed childhood "friend" of Satsuke and totally not a ripoff of anyone in any way, shape, or form.


|<youtube>ETB6wL51x3E</youtube>
* '''[[Tyler Durden|Aikurou Mikisugi]]''' - Honnouji Academy's only teacher, is a [[You|smelly shaggy sleazebag doing jobs for slave wages so he can pay his rent and buy precious anime figurines]] who also [[stalker|observes]] Ryuko's progress and was the one who led her to Senketsu. Every time when Ryuuko gets her ass beaten, she wakes up naked in his basement with cum in her ass. He's actually a [[faggot|FABULOUS]] nudist army leader. His crotch and nipples emanate purple light, as if he wasn't FABULOUS enough.


|<youtube>vBDZJ9TPr_w</youtube>
* '''[[Sick Fuck|Ragyou Kiryuuin]]''' - Satsuki's mom, part Life Fiber, and also the head honcho of REVOCS, the company that produced the clothing you are wearing right now and whose employees are fabric fetishists. She's an incestuous lesbian freak-show.


}}
* '''[[Troll|Nui Harime]]''' - Adorable flower ribbon girl who is simply perfect in every regard and not a psychopath. She killed Ryuko's dad, spoiler.


==Quotes==
* '''[[Albert Einstein|Isshin Matoi]]''' - Ryuko's dad, used to be known as [[Megaman|Dr. Wily]] until he gave up on trying to taking over the world. Gets KILL LA KILL'D by flower-pants above.


{{quote|[[Fact|...especially with Mako being the worst thing to happen to comic relief characters since Jar Jar Binx.]]|[[Weeaboo|Gigguk]]}}
* '''[[Flying Spaghetti Monster|Shinra-Kouketsu]]''' - [[God]] or something like that. Boring!
{{quote|[[Tits|...EVEN IF IT MEANS BEARING MY BREATS FOR THE WORLD TO SEE!]]|Kiryuin Satsuki}}
{{quote|[[Yuri|Get naked, Ryuko]]|Mako Mankanshoku}}
{{quote|She's even better than you despite her lack of experience|Harime Nui}}
{{quote|How does it feel? The pleasure of being enveloped by Junketsu.|Kiryuin Ragyo teaching bondage.}}
{{quote|[[Orgasm|The pleasure of being worn by Junketsu is out of this world!]]|Matoi Ryuuuuuko describing her [[Sex|experience]]}}
{{quote|LIFE FIBER SYNCHRONIZE! KAMUI SENKETSU!|Ryuuko Matoi}}
{{quote|LIFE FIBER OVERRIDE! KAMUI JUNKETSU!|Satsuki Kiryuin}}
{{quote|LIFE FIBER [[BDSM|DOMINATE]]! SHINRA-KOUKETSU!|Ragyou Kiryuin}}
{{quote|Who needs training when you're pissed off!?|Expert Ryuko's Expert Advice}}


== Gallery ==
== Gallery ==


<center><gallery>
{{collapsegallery|Because KLK's sole purpose is [[autism|inspiration]] and [[fap|pleasure]], have a fucking bonanza.|klkgallery|center|
File:Kill la kill 1.jpg
<gallery perrow=5>
File:Kill la kill 2.jpg
File:mightyboobsz.jpg|The savior of cleavage.
File:Kill la kill 3.jpg
File:KLK1.jpg|Edge skankery at its finest.
File:GODMILF.jpg|[[Robot Unicorn Attack|ALWAAAAYS I WANT TO BE WITH YOU]]
File:GODMILF.jpg|[[Robot Unicorn Attack|ALWAAAAYS I WANT TO BE WITH YOU]]
File:GODMILF_Exploitable.jpg|[[Oh exploitable]]
File:GODMILF_Exploitable.jpg|[[Oh exploitable]]
File:Kill la Kill IRL.jpg|[[what is this i dont even]]
File:Kill la Kill IRL.jpg|[[what is this i dont even]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow=5>
File:tumblr_my2yatRqSd1slnf7ro2_500.png|[[Kill it with fire|Also Canon]]
File:tumblr_my2yatRqSd1slnf7ro2_500.png|[[Kill it with fire|Also Canon]]
File:In Soviet Russia....jpg|[[TITS OR GTFO|What did we say about tits Ryuuko?!]]
File:In Soviet Russia....jpg|[[TITS OR GTFO|Curiously barren.]]
File:Totally Not Counterfeit.jpg|Which year do you think this currency will be [[Inflation|hyper-inflated]]?
File:Uzu's penis size.jpg|Uzu's [[micropenis|dick]]...
File:PutSomeClothesOn.PNG|...is tiny...
File:Totally Not Counterfeit.jpg|When do you think this currency will be [[Inflation|hyper-inflated]]?
File:Harime Hui PWN'D.png|Do you know how much how her arms are worth!? She's the [[Powerword|Grand Couturier]] damnit!
File:Harime Hui PWN'D.png|Do you know how much how her arms are worth!? She's the [[Powerword|Grand Couturier]] damnit!
File:Harime Nui Insane.png|Not so Kawaii now are you?
File:Harime Nui Insane.png|Kawaii uguu.
</gallery></center>
File:NO MOM NO alt.jpg|Canon spooge material.
File:GrumpyMatoi.jpg|Period la Period.
File:Matoi2.jpg|SHE TRIGGERED ME!
File:MatoiMeme.jpg|[[Gurren Lagann|Close enough.]]
File:MistyRyuuko.jpg|[[Pokémon|Gotta Kill 'em All]]
File:KLKNakey.jpg
File:Ryuuko is edge-volving.gif|Ryuuko has evolved into the Edgequeen.
File:Nonon.jpg
File:Nani.png
</gallery>}}


== External links ==
== External links ==


{{wikilink|Kill_la_Kill|Kill la Kill}}<br />
*{{Wikialink|kill-la-kill||Because we needed another Wiki.}}<br />
{{Wikialink|kill-la-kill|Kill la Kill}}<br />
*http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Anime/KillLaKill/‎ '''Have a trope-spewing fuck-orgy.'''
*[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Anime/KillLaKill‎ ''Kill la Kill'' &bull; TV Tropes]


{{anime}}
{{anime}}
{{stub}}


[[Category:Anime]]
[[Category:Anime]]
{{timeline|Featured Article March 30th & 31st [[2015]]|[[Jeremiah True]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Fiero425]]}}

Latest revision as of 20:06, 30 May 2018

This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example,
HOLY SHIT Ragyo Kiruin is Ryuuko's actual mother, Satsuki is not evil and wants to pwn Ragyo, and Ruuko is not a human but a fiber monster. And yes, Senketsu dies in the end!!!1
   
“ 		 
How does it feel? The pleasure of being enveloped by Junketsu.
  		„
  		 

—Fuckin' Japan making everything all weird

Kill la Kill is regarded for its ulterior art style.

Kill la Kill (キルラキル Kiru ra Kiru) is an edgy Magical Girl Animu made by Trigger, who has a period fetish (OH GOD WHY?). It's basically Gurren Lagann and Dragon Ball Z combined, or what Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt would look like with a PG13 rating and not a hint of originality. The plot is related to FLCL, complete with Goku uniforms. It was hailed by /a/ as the savior of animu, but it turned out to be nothing special. Instead we just got more cheap fap material posing as some deep and poetic story that would last the ages.


Plot

Tasteful female empowerment.

A compelling story of empowerment and vengeance. Ryuko Matoi is an upstanding girl willing to fight in the face of adversity to seek out who killed her father years ago. She is forced into the evil, pitiful bowels of Honnouji Academy where she fights off evil prep students while finishing her homework in time for her next class. With her trusty friend Mako Mankanshoku and her dog Guts, they set off once again to save the world from evil, greed, male homosexuality, the Pokémon League, and conservatives who hate sexy Japanese cartoon boobies.

Nothing to see here. Like every goddamn anime made after 2005 ever, Kill la Kill is composed of fanservice, ass shots, BEWBS, a superficial heap of shit plot to make you forget that it's solely fapbait, and moar fanservice. Sex sells, and if it bleeds it leads! Who needs a compelling story anyway? It's not like the human race is heading towards a higher plane of existence and reason.

Life Fibers

Proposed crossover with Dork Sanic and other autism-inducing shite.

Life Fibers are cheap tacky fanservice for 15 year-old basement dwellers to schlock off to the deep and intricate main plot device for this tasteful garbage. They are essentially ancient fabric parasites that 'chose' humans for having the best nervous system at the time when they invaded, advancing our evolution to the point of dominating the planet (a strange side-effect of being the host of a PARASITE). Unfortunately people like John Langdon Down and Hans Asperger discovered that these Life Fibers didn't leech off of all the humans. Probably because they don't even exist in this fantastic cartoon's universe.

The only people with any clue of these fibers are the Kiryuin clan, Isshin Matoi, Nudist Beach, and Ryuko Matoi.

Life Fibers are critical in making these originally named Goku Uniforms; these Goku Uniforms have 5 known forms:

  • 1-Star - Uniforms of 10% Life Fibers, all who wear them become Life Fiber Nazis who all look like standard mooks despite the fact they're supposed to be fucking students.
  • 2-Star - Uniforms of 20% Life Fibers, all who wear them become Alfluenzic smug retards who secretly want Ryuko and Nui to Scissor.
  • 3-Star - Uniforms of 30% Life Fibers, only worn by the Elite Four.
  • 10-Star (Kamui) - Sailor Moon suit consisting of 100% Life Fibers, for some reason they talk to only you and don't make you FUCK SHIT UP! They 'awaken' when they drink your blood and turn into slutty armour and you into a sex icon; they only truly work when you want your boobs and ass to be the first parts of your body that people see.

Characters

There is a perfectly logical reason for this.
There is a perfectly logical reason for this.

Kill la Kill gives us a wide and diverse array of characters not only oozing in originality but also in many other regards.
Remember, this is canon
A typical HAAALLELUJAH moment
More incestuous molesting
The Jew gets assraped
She did it for the lulz


  • Ryuuko Matoi-Kiryuuin - 17 year-old girl and strong independent womyn. Shows up at the Academy, challenges Satsuki to a fight almost immediately and somehow winds up as a student. A perfect female heroine to guide us from the patriarchy.
  • Senketsu - A living and breathing Evangelion sailor uniform Ryuko finds beneath her house. It grants her temporary power until she passes out. Is actually an alien made by Ryuuko's dad, Isshin, to fight against REVOCS. Spoiler!
  • Junketsu - Another Sailor Moon suit that NEVER speaks. EVER. Riders of the Kill La Kill Hype Train have speculated that he is a demon pervert. It was supposed to be Satsuki's wedding dress that would enslave her to clothing but instead it was her fanservice battle dress that enslaved Ryuko to clothing while keeping her in a perpetual orgasm.
  • Mako Mankanshoku - Ryuko's only friend. Her power is to put a stop to any fight by smoking crack and being the most definite example of an airhead known to exist. She owns a dog named Guts who derps around all day, aimlessly hoping to be the next wacky side-kick.
  • Satsuki Kiryuuin - the main antagonist, 18 year old and president of the student council at Honnouji Academy. Has bigass eyebrows, a manface, and a HUGE FUCKING ASS. She's actually Ryuuko's sister: spoiler.
  • Uzu Sanageyama - the guy who voluntarily blinded himself after losing a fight to Ryuuko, which made him super fast and sensitive. Again, no archetypes in this series. None at all.
  • Nonon Jakuzure - A kawaii uguu monkey girl with a disgusting grumpy voice that resembles the sound produced by nails grinding through a chalkboard. She was the school band leader, despite conducting nothing but terrible faggoty trite in every scene she's featured in. Supposed childhood "friend" of Satsuke and totally not a ripoff of anyone in any way, shape, or form.
  • Ragyou Kiryuuin - Satsuki's mom, part Life Fiber, and also the head honcho of REVOCS, the company that produced the clothing you are wearing right now and whose employees are fabric fetishists. She's an incestuous lesbian freak-show.
  • Nui Harime - Adorable flower ribbon girl who is simply perfect in every regard and not a psychopath. She killed Ryuko's dad, spoiler.
  • Isshin Matoi - Ryuko's dad, used to be known as Dr. Wily until he gave up on trying to taking over the world. Gets KILL LA KILL'D by flower-pants above.

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Featured Article March 30th & 31st 2015
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