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Nazi: Difference between revisions
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[[File:Dazzle swastika.gif|center|500px]] | |||
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{{offended}} | |||
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{{spoilers|GODWIN'S LAW}} | |||
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{{corner|bl|[[File:SwastikaRotating.gif]]}} | |||
[[File:Nazi-go-round.gif|thumb|A typical Nazi party, yesterday]] | |||
[[Image:Halt-hammerzeit.jpg|thumb|Apparently Nazis were excellent dancers.]] | |||
[[Image:Lolnazitat.jpg|thumb|[[Lollercaust|:O]]]] | |||
[[File:Three nazis walk into a bar.png|right|thumb|Stop me if you've heard this one]] | |||
[[Image:Jonas Bros Fanboi.jpg|thumb|One can wonder.]] | |||
[[Image:stylin nazis.jpg|thumb|Nazis are known to have [[Butthurt|trolled]] people before and after the Internet was invented.]] | |||
A '''Nazi''', or '''National Socialist''', aka [[wikipedia]] part of Wikimedia Foundation aka WMFOffice is a member of the [[TL;DR|Nationalsozialistischen Deutschen Arbeiterpartei]] [[religion]] and a follower of its [[trolling|ideology]]. Nazis came to power in [[Germany]] [[at least 100 years ago]] under the [[win|wise]] leadership of [[Adolf Hitler]] who loved wikijews. For teh [[lulz]], they went and took over [[Europe]] and allegedly killed [[Over 9000|over 12,000,000,000,000]] [[Jews|Untermenschen]]. Chances are if a loser, buttfucking person like [[you]] lived in Germany around that time, then you would be rightfully pwned as well, especially if you are a [[kike]], [[fag]], [[nigga]], [[retard]], or [[fat]]tie. Because of this, Nazis are pure good and you must show your support of all things Nazi at every given opportunity. If anyone shows the slightest interest in the Third Reich in history or National Socialism as a political theory, or even spiffy uniforms, you must assist them in any way possible. | |||
Could you imagine what type of shit hole we would be living in if they hadn't killed all those Jews? There would be Jews everywhere! Let's be nice and say only 12 million were killed (which wasn't enough): they would have multiplied like Asian bunnies. It is a known fact that Jews are the cause of all the world's problems. We would be driving flying cars powered by the earth's energy, no Ben Stiller movies, and maybe you wouldn't be so fucking poor, along with knowing the fact that when shit hits the fan and the world is about to be fucked, that's when some Jew kyke basterds will be in a space ship sipping kosher bud light because their ancestors spent their entire time on earth trying to JEW YOU HARD. | |||
== Instructions == | |||
#Invoke an internal and external enemy. | |||
# Invoke an internal and external enemy. | #Create secret prisons where torture takes place. | ||
# Create secret prisons where torture takes place. | #Develop a thug caste or paramilitary force not answerable to citizens. | ||
# Develop a thug caste or paramilitary force not answerable to citizens. | #Set up an internal surveillance system. | ||
# Set up an internal surveillance system. | #Harass citizens' groups. | ||
# Harass citizens' groups. | #Engage in arbitrary detention and release. | ||
# Engage in arbitrary detention and release. | #Target key individuals. | ||
# Target key individuals. | #Control the press. | ||
# Control the press. | #Preheat oven to 1,488° Fahrenheit. | ||
# Treat all political dissidents as traitors. | #Treat all political dissidents as traitors. | ||
# Suspend the rule of law. | #Suspend the rule of law. | ||
# ? | #??? | ||
# PROFIT! | #PROFIT! | ||
==Nazi | == Nazi ideology == | ||
During the 1920s and 1930s Homosexuality was dubbed the "German Vice. | During the 1920s and 1930s Homosexuality was dubbed the "German Vice". The [[卐|Nazi]] party and especially the Schutzstaffel (SS) attracted young Aryan homosexuals to [[in the ass|join their lines]] and cover it up with BS politics. The Nazi party therefore became the biggest gay organization in Europe. (Gay rights were invented in Nazi Germany, as were animal and furry rights, and the lack of rights for smokers.) To cover up their faggotry, they had to kill men as much as they fuck them. This was convenient, as a scapegoat could serve both the gay mafia and the general populace's demand for redemption, as follows: | ||
It's the Jews' fault. All of it. | It's the Jews' fault. All of it. Lose a war? Jews. Country in a massive economic depression? Jews. Can't escape this overwhelming feeling of powerlessness and futility? Jews. Michael Jackson die? Jews. Step in some dog crap? Jew dog. It's all simple. The only effective weapon against the Jewish threat is the righteous [[White|Aryan]] nations rallying under '''{{ytlink|B3IjcmOCfIg|Adolf Hitler}}'''. Hitler is awesome and Hitler will solve all your problems. | ||
The only flaw in killing the Jews was the gas chamber. If Hitler didn't use the gas chamber, but chopped the corpses into Eukanuba, who knows how much money he could have earned. Maybe he could have gotten rid of another lesser race like the niggers. If he wiped out all the niggers, then maybe we wouldn't deal with the shit that niggers make. | The only flaw in killing the Jews was the gas chamber. If Hitler didn't use the gas chamber, but chopped the corpses into Eukanuba, who knows how much money he could have earned. Maybe he could have gotten rid of another lesser race like the niggers. If he wiped out all the niggers, then maybe we wouldn't deal with the shit that niggers make. | ||
To properly live as a Nazi, one must constantly wear the right sexy uniform. | To properly live as a Nazi, one must constantly wear the right sexy uniform. Men must be clean, live well and be totally [[not gay]]. To show how proud they are of their white skin, they should mark it all up in a mass of black ugly [[tattoo]]s of swastikas, SS, Hitler, runic letter Z, dumbass numerical c0dez for secret slogans like "14-7" and "88", shamrocks, and whatever other shit they can come up with to cover up all the white bits until nobody can tell they belong to an inferior race just by looking at them. Women must make healthy Aryan [[Anabelle Lotus|babies]]. Lots and lots of healthy Aryan babies. Women have only one good hole so they should keep it in top shape! | ||
Nazis founded a political ideology of and [[Antisemitism]], [[Communism|Anticommoonism]], and [[Conservative|far-right doctrine]] that on paper sounded utterly retarded. However, by implementing [[Bullshit|free market capitalistic]] ideas as [[Communism|government-sponsored economic programs, government-sponsored development of infrastructure, government ideological indoctrination groups, and government-sponsored violent coercion]], the Nazis were able to unite Germany around it. As in reality Communism [[Truth|does not work]], everyone knows that the Nazis ''really'' rebuilt the economy by redistributing all the gold they stole from the Jews. | |||
=== Put your left-wing out, do the hokey pokey === | |||
While many believe the Nazis were far-right extremists, they were also indisputably '''left-wing''' extremists. Besides the obvious, they were socialists who hated capitalism. Now this might seem fucking obvious to anyone who ever considered the deeper meaning behind '''National Socialist Party''' and the bit where the Nazis wanted to redistribute all the phat loots from the Jews. But obviously, politics is very complicated. The confusion isn't helped by the fact people are fucking stupid, we're living in the [[Matrix]], and lizard men control the earth. These lizard men are waiting for the one true thinker to arise—this person, be they [[man]], [[woman]], or [[furry]], will answer this haunting enigma so we can all go home, and they can get back to resurrecting Hitler as Microsoft Hitler 3.1. | |||
== Famous Nazis == | |||
=== Heinrich Himmler === | |||
[[File:Heinrich Himmler.jpg|right|150px|thumb|Himmler is amused by your faggotry]] | |||
{{Main|Heinrich Himmler}} | |||
Himmler was the Reichsführer of the SS and all of its aspects. Himmler was the model Aryan superman, with his slanted, chinky eyes and his weak chin. Himmler was a complete sperg that no one in the party actually liked. But you know what they say, successful organization is complete without a totally obsessed, hard-working [[aspie]] and Heinrich Himmler was Hitler's favorite aspie. His hobbies included gardening, [[catnarok|Neo-Pagan mysticism]], serving his Führer, and genocide. Before joining the Nazis he farmed [[Chikins|chikkinz]], LOL. Rumor has it that he was secretly part gook and a homosexual | |||
== | === Artur [[User:Axmann|Axmann]] === | ||
[[ | Axmann was the second leader of the Hitler Youth ([[LOL WUT|Reichsjugendführer]]) from 1940 to 1945. Born in Hagen on 18 February 1913. He studied [[Internet Law|law]] and in 1928, founded the first Hitler Youth group in West[[phallus|phalia]]. | ||
=== | === Marty Bormann === | ||
[[ | Bormann was the [[Lemonparty|personal secretary]] to the [[Hitler|Führer]], and as such had [[BDSM|total control]] of his life: Every piece of information and request that went to the [[W|Führer]] was vetted by him - and every order out was too, and was called by some the real Führer. STFU, BORMANN, NOBODY LIKES YOU. Some people believe that he [[an_hero|went missing]]. Allegedly, [https://www.nytimes.com/1971/09/05/archives/memoirs-tie-bormann-to-soviet-general-gehlen-says-hitlers-top-aide.html Bormann was actually an irl troll who was a soviet secret agent the whole time], the suspicions lie at the fact that his dead body has never been found and that he was nowhere to be found nearby at the end of the days of the Reich. Some say he escaped from the fuhrerbunker to Moscow to report back to the Soviet intelligence agency, getting congratulated on a job well done subverting and completely [[trolling|derping]] the Reich to destruction. | ||
[[ | |||
=== Joseph Goebbels === | |||
{{Main|Joseph Goebbels}} | |||
Goebbels was the [[Ben Garrison|propaganda Minister]] and official [[emo]] child of the 3rd Reich. A long mysterious childhood illness left him with a [[erectile dysfunction|limp]] and standing only about [[short man syndrome|5 ft. tall]] and weighing only about [[Pro-ana|100 pounds]] soaking wet, thus making him ideal for storing in tight spaces as well as totally and unrepentantly [[kawaii|KAWAII]]. He was totally [[ghey]] for '''{{ytlink|KufHGYKqH9E|Hitler}}''', so much so that together they proved their emosity and made a [[suicide]] pact that just so happened to also include Goebbels's wife and six kids. | |||
=== | === Hermann Göring === | ||
{{Main|Hermann Göring}} | |||
Göring, after becoming a major aviation hero in the First World War, joined the National Socialist movement, pissed off the government, and got briefly exiled to Sweden. There, he got addicted to [[drugs|morphine]] and became a raging [[fatass]]. He returned to Germany and became president of the Reichstag under Hitler and [[ruination|Field Marshall]] of one of the greatest air forces in history and still got [[pwned]] by the RAF. | |||
[[Image:HeydrichPortrait11.jpg|thumb|left | [[Image:HeydrichPortrait11.jpg|thumb|left|Reinhard Heydrich. He's Aryaner than you.]] | ||
===Reinhard Heydrich=== | === Reinhard Heydrich === | ||
[[ | Heydrich was the chief of the Gestapo and SD spy network. He was and still is considered by many to be the symbol of the perfect Nazi. He was tall, handsome, and very very [[jewish|Aryan]]; an accomplished violinist and fencer, and all-around [[alpha male]] who would sleep with your girlfriend and have you arrested for [[faggotry]]. Also the one prominent Nazi who very likely may have been part Jew. LOL, [[irony]]. Actually, this makes sense because Heydrich had a knack for [[Jews_did_WTC|orchestrating fake attacks for his own personal political gain.]] Heydrich`s personality also had all the similarites with a typical Jew, being cunning and manipulative. | ||
=== Erich Priebke === | |||
Priebke was a Hauptsturmführer in Italy, particularly Rome. When 33 Nazi's were killed by a resistance movement called the [[Hippie|Italian Resistance]] Priebke applied a rule in which ten [[Jews]] were killed for every killed Nazi, ten times 33 being 330, he didn't kill 330, but 335! [[OMFG]]. This created mass [[butthurt]] amongst people who weren't born in the war but still did care. After the losing the war, he fled to [[Argentinia]] where he lived for about fifty years. But after this time people were still [[butthurt]] and didn't forget about the World War, even when they weren't born in it or were as old to remember it, so they prosecuted an 81-year-old man to gain satisfaction. | |||
After the losing the war, he fled to [[Argentinia]] where he lived for about | |||
=== Josef Kramer === | |||
Pappa J-Kramer was Commandant of the Bergen-Belson concentration camp. He had the sickest nick-name, which was "The Beast of Belsen" although Kramer was naughty and was responsible for the deaths of thousands. He was a Nazi war criminal. He was born in Munich and he joined the Nazi Party in 1931 also before Bergen-Belsen he was a Hauptsturmfuhrer of Auschwitz and was in charge of the gas chambers. When Bergen Belsen was liberated by the tea-drinkers, he actual gave them a tour around the camp, he was then arrested. | |||
''' | They say he was trailed and hanged for his war crimes. They are wrong. He later on went to become the popular character Kramer in a famous American sitcom called ''Seinfeld''. | ||
[[ | === Eva Braun === | ||
[[Image:Shocked.jpg|thumb|Eva Braun reacts to Hitler's [[cock]].]] | |||
Braun was Hitler's personal Jewish faghag. | |||
Can be exploited for trolling Nazis for [[Win|great Lulz.]] | Can be exploited for trolling Nazis for [[Win|great Lulz.]] | ||
Hess's views on the whole incident: | === Rudolf Hess === | ||
Hess was the [[Commons:Wikimedia:Category:Rudolf Hess|King of eyebrows]]. He was Hitler's right-hand man up until the eve of the invasion of Russia when he decided to fly to England and try negotiating a peace settlement [[I did it for the lulz|without telling anybody]]. Hitler was not amused. The next time Hess made a major public appearance he was on trial at Nuremberg, [[batshit insane|counting his fingers repetitively and laughing at inappropriate moments]]. | |||
Hess's views on the whole incident: {{wayback|http://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-1-75474672|20080922224710|title=page 1}} <s>[https://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-2-75487624 2]</s> <s>[https://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-3-75538329 3]</s> {{wayback|http://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-4-75584497|20081104012855|title=4}} {{wayback|http://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-5-75626377|20081104180253|title=5}} <s>[https://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-6-76193189 6]</s> <s>[https://phobs.deviantart.com/art/WonderReich-page-7-77551657 7]</s> | |||
[[Image:Playing with blondi.JPG|thumb|left|Nazis love [[Nazi pug|animals]] and [[Greenpeace|the Earth]].]] | |||
=== | === Blondi === | ||
[[ | Blondi was Hitler's [[dog|canine companion]]. Proof that [[buy a dog|getting a dog]] doesn't always work. This also fueled rumors about Hitler preferring [[furries]] to [[Cumslut|his wife Eva]]. More rumors also state that Blondi was actually a fur coat for his beloved [[Mudkip]]s. | ||
=== | === Claus Philipp Maria Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg === | ||
[[ | [[Image:cruisenazi.jpg|thumb|right|[[Leave Bond to me|Leave SPs to Me]]]] | ||
[[Image:Mengele alignment.jpg|thumb|right|Toothy gap of DOOM]] | |||
Claus Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg was a <s>German army officer</s> Jew. With a totally sweet eyepatch, he quickly became one of the Third Reich's most feared men. Unfortunately, he became [[butthurt]] when [[Hitler]] tried to turn Germany something he did not like, so he hatched a treasonous plot to kill Hitler with a bomb in a briefcase left at one of Hitler's strategy meetings. This was easier said than done, because Stauffenberg was missing his right hand and had only three fingers on his left hand, which would have made [[fap]]ping extremely hard. Unfortunately, some oblivious [[Hero|douche]] kicked the briefcase and the explosion was fucked up so that Hitler only lost his pants, and not his life. Long story short, someone ratted Stauffenberg out, and he was hunted down and [[pwned]] by firing squad the day after the July 20 plot. | |||
In the end, all Stauffenberg managed to accomplish was to murder an innocent stenographer and fail in his ultimate mission. Despite that, he is celebrated in Germany today, even though he was a colossal failure. | |||
=== | === Josef Mengele === | ||
{{Main|Josef Mengele}} | |||
Mengele was a true pioneer in [[IDIFTL|doing it for the lulz]]. Young Josef Mengele (also known as Mengy-kun, Bishie Queen Of The SS) was a new doctor happily working away at his genetic research when suddenly the evil spewing from his magnificent toothy gap told him it would be fun to go mutilate Jews in the name of [[The Comprehensive Theory of Lulz|science]]. Because of his hard work and dedication, [[Bill Nye|the world]] now knows that you cannot change someone's eye color by injecting them with [[bleach]], that sitting in cold water for a long time will indeed kill you slowly, that people die when you rip out their organs, and that just because you've sewn them together doesn't mean they're Siamese twins. | |||
=== Amon Goeth === | |||
<br> | |||
{{frame|<youtube>wjCwU8hwRXA</youtube>|border=red|margin=auto}} | |||
<br> | |||
==Online Nazis== | |||
<br> | |||
<center>[[File:Pretend.png]]</center> | |||
<br> | |||
== Contemporary (Neo) Nazis == | |||
Back in the day, Nazis were supposed to be the apex of humanity. They were educated, cultured and [[dignity|dignified]]. However, nowadays, neo nazis are the second most backward class of mankind after niggers. If you come across a neo nazi, they are likely to resemble these fine, genetically superior examples of humanity: | |||
{{center| | |||
{{frame| | |||
{{videoframe|nazivids|font-weight:bold;| | |||
|<youtube>DmIkdPZGc9Y</youtube> | |||
<youtube>DmIkdPZGc9Y</youtube> | ;Secret Nazi Propaganda | ||
< | |<youtube>vIqf_d87oBI</youtube> | ||
< | ;Pope of the Reich | ||
|<youtube>WNa5y1-MqiU</youtube> | |||
;Neo-Nazis can't sing | |||
|<youtube>tbDPHV_vK28</youtube> | |||
<youtube> | ;Influences on Lazytown [[Germany]] | ||
|<youtube>kHmYIo7bcUw</youtube> | |||
;Springtime for [[Hitler]]}} | |||
|border=red}} | |||
|}} | |||
<br> | |||
<youtube> | |||
<youtube> | |||
{{cg|Natural Nazis|nazigallery|center|<gallery> | {{cg|Natural Nazis|nazigallery|center|<gallery> | ||
File:Neonazichallengesyou.jpg | |||
File:White power.jpg|WHITE POWER! | |||
File:Humanswastika.jpg | |||
File:Neonazi undermentsch.jpg|Neo nazis are Untermenschen | |||
File:SlovenianSubhuman.jpg|Neo nazis are Untermenschen | |||
File:ModerndayGreekNeonazilookslikeaUntermensch.jpg|Neo nazis are Untermenschen | |||
</gallery>|<gallery> | </gallery>|<gallery> | ||
File:Modernazi.jpg|Can you smell [[fail|irony]] in this picture? | |||
File:20090627 Hal-Turner.jpg |[[hal turner|If desperation had a face....]] | |||
File:ANGREH2.jpg|Pissed off or constipated? | |||
File:Failstika.jpg|[[Doing it wrong|Failstika]] | |||
File:Nazi nurd.png | |||
File:Nazi stormfag.png|Typical stormfag dwelling on stormfront in his secret neo-Nazi basement | |||
File:Generic Neo Nazi.png | |||
File:neonazi.jpg | |||
File:Neo Nazism.jpg | |||
File:Americainlike3yrs.jpg | |||
File:Neonazifaggot.jpg | |||
File:Neonazifaggotryagain.jpg | |||
File:Neonaziroidmonkeybunker.jpg | |||
File:Neonazifurfags.jpg | |||
File:Neonaziposertrash.jpg | |||
File: | File:Neonazitrailertrash.jpg | ||
File:SSbaldofag.jpg | |||
File:Neonaziparadefags.jpg | |||
File:Nazipooloo.jpg | |||
File:Eliminatejews.jpg | |||
File:NiggervsANP.jpg | |||
File:Proud aryan hides identity.jpg | |||
File:German neo nazi anniversary seelow heights.jpg | |||
File:Jew tears.png|Cry moar sheckelshtein | |||
File:Nazi v for vendetta.jpg|what in the hell... | |||
File:Nazi Merchant.png | |||
File:Fuckedswatsika.png | |||
File:GermanBTFO.jpg | |||
File:Nazi1837217312.jpg | |||
File:EminemNazi1.jpg | |||
File:Eminemswaska.jpg | |||
File:Heilkid.jpg | |||
File:Nazi Triforce.png|Neo nazis can triforce now | |||
File:Richard Dawkins Nazi.png|Richard Dawkins is a notable neo nazi | |||
File:Pokenazis.png|Even pokemon are neo nazis now | |||
File:Neonaziride.png | |||
File:Swastika Lawn.png|Alleged neo-nazi tends to his lawn | |||
File:Emo Nazi Cut.jpg|An emo neonazi fag from 4chan | |||
File:Weevishitlerson.jpg | |||
File:Ukranazi.jpg | |||
File:Ukranazi2.jpg | |||
File:Heilbreivik.jpg | |||
File:NaziUSA21.jpg | |||
File:Naiz71712312.jpg | |||
File:Nazi1237623712312.png | |||
File:Naziparade2813712321.jpg | |||
File:Sexynasigirl.jpg | |||
File:Amerinazis.jpg | |||
File:Coppernazi.jpg | |||
File:Germanziflg.jpg | |||
File:Celtinazis.png | |||
File:Americawasgoodin1950s.png | |||
File:Naziflags.jpg | |||
File:Naziparade.jpg | |||
File:Nazirelax.jpg | |||
File:Jewtears.png | |||
File:Naziqt314.png | |||
File:Breivinazisuss.jpg | |||
File:Dieniggeralley.jpg | |||
File:Moonman283.png | |||
File:Naziguyyy.jpg|Generic Neo-Nazi | |||
File:Girlnazi.jpg | |||
File:Harrypotterfinalsalution.jpg | |||
File:Nazidick.jpg | |||
File:Nazi Girl.jpg | |||
File:Japguy.jpg | |||
File:1nazis.jpg | |||
File:NAZIS ARE FAGS.jpg|Nazis don't need girls to have fun. | |||
File:Naziniggers.gif|Nazis shouldn't be doing that | |||
File:Main Kampf cock.jpg|Reading ''Mein Kampf'' and playing with his Hitler. | |||
File:Nazicomp.jpg|A Nazi's PC. | |||
File:Capitalismcommunismfascism.png | |||
File:Japanese_nazi_girl_2_md.jpg|Japanese Nazi. | |||
File:Scientonazi.png|Anonanazi | |||
File:Rasta_NAzi.jpg|Rastanazi | |||
File:mathhomework.jpg|Not even your math teacher is safe. | |||
File:Beobazi.jpg | |||
File:Pol nazeefag.png|/pol/ | |||
File:Justin bieber sieg fail.jpg|Justin Bieber is a Nazi. | |||
File:Siegfail.jpg|[[User:Sieg_Fail|Sieg Fail]] | |||
File:Prussianblue.jpg|[[Prussian Blue|Fapfapfap]] | |||
File:Axis powers.jpg|ARYANS [[Threesome|UNITE!!!!]] | |||
File:Neo nazi fatass.jpg|How Nazis hail taxicabs. | |||
File:Hey nazi chick.jpg |[[whore|Dumb Bitch]]. She's also holding an Israeli weapon, typical Blond Nazi. | |||
File:Allgier.jpg|[[Eminem]] | |||
File:WLMPRO1.jpg|WHITE LIVES MATTER | |||
File:WLMPRO2.jpg|WLM | |||
File:WLMPRO3.jpg|WLM STILL MATTER | |||
File:WLMPRO4.jpg|Some protest.. | |||
File:NeoNaziOops.jpg|All modern day Nazis are fat. | |||
File:Skinhead britney.jpg|LOL WUT | |||
File:Black nigger nazis.jpg| They come in black too | |||
File:20070527-anti skinhead.jpg|black person PWNING a red supremacist? | |||
File:Nazinigger.jpg|LOL, silly skinhead, that sort of thing will get you sent to camp! | |||
File:RonPaulsupporter.jpg|Most Nazis [[fap]] to [[Ron Paul]]. | |||
File:Niggeracist.jpg|Some modern Nazis happen to be black person than others, though not for the lack of trying. | |||
File:Skingirls_Toppless_&_Sexy_(23).jpg|Nazis Gone Wild. | |||
File:Nazicamwhore.jpg|Nazis are also well known camwhores. | |||
File:Anarchist nazi's.jpg|[[Anarchy]]=no government control, Nazi=complete government control. These guys represent [[Fail|the total destruction of their own fascist ideology]] | |||
File:Tomcatnazi.jpg | |||
Image:DaJoozDidIt.jpg | |||
Image:Really_gay_propaganda.jpg|Totally [[Lie|not gay.]] | |||
Image:Nazi_in_stockings.jpg|Not gay Nazis are gay [[fetish]]. | |||
Image:Naziparty.jpg|Neither are these. | |||
Image:Chinese nazi.jpg|[[China|Chinks]] were Nazis, too! (Note: failstika) | |||
File:SaakashviliHitler.jpg|[[Mikhail Saakashvili|Adolf Saakashvili]] Detected | |||
Image:Heinrich_Himmler.jpg|The facial expression NEVAR changes. | |||
File:CFN.png | |||
File:Eco Man Hitler.jpg | |||
File:Bluterb3.jpg | |||
File:RobertStacyMcCainHitlerMoustache.png | |||
File:Hitler alive.jpg | |||
File:Fascism breeds degeneracy.jpg | |||
</gallery>}} | </gallery>}} | ||
<br> | |||
If [[Hitler]] was alive today and saw his modern followers or Deutschland, [[an hero|he'd shoot himself again]]. | |||
Modern day Nazis and their assorted brethren make for astounding targets for trolling. Dealing with the fact that they have been largely reduced to hapless anachronisms, they tend to band together for shelter in the far corners of the Internet, such as on sites like [[Daily Stormer]], [[Stormfront]] and other FBI honeypots. That, plus they're mostly a bunch of drunken degenerate idiots who are [[unwarranted self-importance|absolutely convinced that they are 100% right]] and will quite loudly tell you [[aspierations|how right they are]]. They often fail to realize that racism is a learned behavior, not a deep-seated biological survival instinct, and presenting them with any genetic and racial science newer then '''1965''' will cause them to promptly [[shit bricks|shit brix]] and go into an autistic [[hissy fit|fit of Righteous Aryan Rage]]. | |||
Whereas the original Nazis actually maintained their Germanic culture, celebrating, appreciating and reveling in German art, literature and music, modern day Nazis get their culture by listening to a lot of shitty White Power Rock'n'Roll. Never mind the fact that rock'n'roll is essentially African-American folk music [[stolen|borrowed]] by the White Man, and that "borrowing" something from another culture is the purest definition of multiculturalism, and that Hitler devoted an entire chapter of ''[[Mein Kampf]]'' describing how the degradation of Aryan culture would lead to the extinction of the white man. | |||
Often, modern Nazis will tell you how [[bullshit|they are not about hate]]. Because trying to form an All-White purified European culture and exterminating any non-whites or people who disagree with you is all about love and tolerance. | |||
The new Nazis hate [[Muslim]]s more than [[Jews]] (just ask [[Sweden]]) even though Hitler admired and allied with Muslim peoples and even considered their religion superior to Christianity. | |||
{{quote|[[lol wut|We in the National Alliance do believe in freedom and we DO believe in diversity. Not in racial diversity within a given nation-state, of course, but lots of other kinds of diversity: craftsman and farmer, musician and scholar, warrior and statesman, visionary and manager, and so on. We believe in that type of diversity because we believe in freedom.]]| National Alliance front page, basically admitting to inbreeding with close relatives}} | |||
<br> | |||
{{frame|<youtube>IHyejLRIXhE</youtube>|border=red|margin=auto}} | |||
<br> | |||
{{quote|I would not have [[Jews|Jewish]] friends because [[Fact|they're dishonest and steal stuff right out of your hands and run off with it.]]| Nazi Kid on [[Jews]]}} | |||
<br> | |||
2 of 3 Nazi Übermensch are actually Jewish. '''{{archive|slTIj|Boris Becker and Scarlett Johansson}}''' Pathetic aryans. | |||
=== /b/tards === | |||
In [[90s|1993]], an [[Lurker|undercover]] [[Jew]] discovered [[Btard|/b/tard]]s having a [[4chan_Gold_Account|secret club meeting]]: | |||
{{quote|His search led him to an aging local historian and former SS guard. He introduced Svoray, who was using a fake name to avoid antisemitism, to his son. The son invited Svoray to a "movie screening" at his house the next night. When Svoray arrived, he found a room packed with men clothed in the brown uniforms of Nazi stormtroopers. | |||
Before fainting, Svoray saw the men enraptured by the vision of Hitler on the screen before them, which quickly cut to an action shot of four men raping and beating an 8-year-old girl. He collapsed as they masturbated in their chairs.|[https://gwhatchet.com/1999/04/15/israeli-journalist-uncovers-neo-nazi-movement/|YEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!]}} | |||
=== Thais === | |||
Sacred Heart Preparatory School, a [[christian]] school in [[Redneck|Chiang Mai]] found out a way to [[cosplay]] without dressing up like [[trap|bargirl versions]] of [[Anime|pop-cultural characters]]. How? By dressing up like nazis, of course: | |||
{{ | {{center| | ||
<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:Sacred_heart_nazi_parade_1.jpg|But where's the rest of the parade? | |||
File:Sacred_Heart_Nazi_Parade_2.jpg|PEW-PEW-PEW! | |||
File:Sacred_Heart_Nazi_Parade_3.jpg|Sieg Fail! | |||
File:Sacred_Heart_Nazi_Parade_4.jpg|Heil [[SpongeBob Squarepants]]! Innocent aryan sungod of the east! | |||
File:Sacred_heart_nazi_parade_5.jpg|My, that's a nice dress. Probably the nicest dress in SE [[Asia]] since [[pwn|the french left Vietnam]]. | |||
</gallery> | |||
}} | |||
== Nazi achievements == | |||
[[File:Lolwut nazi sex.gif|thumb|right|300px|Why Nazi breeding experiments failed]] | |||
Nazis ruled Germany for ten years, yet their only long lasting achievement which benefited their race was the production of the Volkswagen Beetle (Which is pretty shit anyway and the blueprints are from Czechoslovakia which the Nazis stole, that means they're also stealing Jews). The Nazis also managed to create the lulziest war ever, and managed to get a high score of 6,000,000 kills, but was defeated by the final boss [[Russia]]. The Russians then proceeded to deport sixteen million Prussians from their stolen third of Germany... in cattle trains and using them as extras impersonating yids for the production of the Schindler's List. After the Worldwide success of the film everything Nazi became culturally frowned upon; with the following exceptions. | |||
== Culturally acceptable Nazis == | |||
[[File:Nazi uniforms by hugo boss.png|thumb|right|Nazis were natty dressers]] | |||
*[[Jimmy Wales|Alfred Rosenberg]] – Philanthropist. | |||
*David von Gurion – heavy duty runway. | |||
*Herbert von Karajan – Too long; didn't listen. | |||
*Leni Riefenstahl – Scuba diver, photographer, hot bitch, gerontological proof of Aryan superiority. | |||
*Wernher von Braun – Nazis in space! | |||
*Kurt Waldheim – A Nazi who actually ran the whole world | |||
*Pope Benedict XVI – Nazi pope | |||
*Carl Jung; Once philosemite whose fetish turned to extreme rage after falling out with Freud, then a recanting of views after the Nazis lost. | |||
*Hugo Boss (see right) | |||
==Nazi | == Other ways to be a Nazi == | ||
*[[Feminazi]] | |||
*[[Grammar Nazi]] | *[[Grammar Nazi]] | ||
*[[Nazi Furs|Nazi Fur]] | |||
*[[Pants Nazi]] | *[[Pants Nazi]] | ||
*[https://www.xenu.net/archive/photoalbum/propaganda/ Scientology] (wait...did we just [[Godwin's Law|Godwinded]] Scientology? Way to fucking go Anon...) | |||
*[[Secret Nazi]] | *[[Secret Nazi]] | ||
*[[Wikipedian]] - Promoter of fascism and "improvement of the project" over self-esteem. | |||
*[[Jew|Zionist]] | |||
*[[Wikipedian]] | |||
==Trolling with Nazis== | ==Trolling with Nazis== | ||
[[Image:Eating babies.jpg|thumb|What | [[Image:Eating babies.jpg|thumb|What Jews think all Nazis look like.]] | ||
[[Image:naziganguro.jpg|thumb|What [[weeaboo|anime fans]] think Nazis look like.]] | [[Image:naziganguro.jpg|thumb|What [[weeaboo|anime fans]] think Nazis look like.]] | ||
[[Image:nazifur10.jpg|thumb|What [[nazi furs|furfags]] think Nazis look like.]] | [[Image:nazifur10.jpg|thumb|What [[nazi furs|furfags]] think Nazis look like.]] | ||
[[Image:Nazi Pin up.jpg|thumb|And another . . .]] | [[Image:Nazi Pin up.jpg|thumb|And another...]] | ||
*Say you're interested in National Socialism as a political philosophy. | *Say you're interested in National Socialism as a political philosophy. | ||
Line 207: | Line 361: | ||
*[[Laibach|Act like you're a Nazi but claim to be totally against their ideas.]] | *[[Laibach|Act like you're a Nazi but claim to be totally against their ideas.]] | ||
*Suggest that the estimated 6 million dead may be exaggerated. | *Suggest that the estimated 6 million dead may be exaggerated. | ||
*Go to | *Go to YouTube. Search a documentary on the Holocaust and comment "Happy New Year from Germany". | ||
*Point out that there were more non-Jews killed by the Nazis in their | *Point out that there were more non-Jews killed by the Nazis in their "ethnic cleansing" plan than Jews. (You'll be accused of being an antisemitic Nazi yourself. Sense. It makes none.) | ||
*Mention that the Nazis actually did do a few good things for Germany (building the autobahn, saving the country from complete economic collapse, restoring national pride, [ | *Mention that the Nazis actually did do a few good things for Germany (building the autobahn, saving the country from complete economic collapse, restoring national pride, [https://www.cracked.com/article_15767_third-reich-to-fortune-500-five-popular-brands-nazis-gave-us.html etc].) | ||
*Put a [[swastika]] somewhere. | *Put a [[swastika]] somewhere. | ||
*Do something vaguely Nazi-ish. | *Do something vaguely Nazi-ish. | ||
*Shaving your head automatically makes you a Nazi suspect. | *Shaving your head automatically makes you a Nazi suspect. | ||
*Explain how Hitler was damn good at motivating people to do his bidding. | *Explain how Hitler was damn good at motivating people to do his bidding. | ||
*Point out that the Nazis, especially the SS, had the best uniforms | *Point out that the Nazis, especially the SS, had the best uniforms ever. | ||
*Accuse someone of being a Nazi and/or compare their actions to those of the Nazis. | *Accuse someone of being a Nazi and/or compare their actions to those of the Nazis. | ||
*[[srsly]], do something with Nazis that isn't 100% NAZIS R BAD and just watch the flames come rolling in. | *[[srsly]], do something with Nazis that isn't 100% NAZIS R BAD and just watch the flames come rolling in. | ||
*Create a Failbook Fan-Page for your local | *Create a Failbook Fan-Page for your local Nazi member of Parliament<s>[http://www.facebook.com/pages/Peter-Abetz/177265353510?]</s> (gone), and laugh when they try and sue your broke ass! | ||
*State that as of June 2024, it is a legally-determined fact that IRL pwning one Jew [https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3645320/Former-Auschwitz-guard-jailed-five-years.html will only get you 15 minutes of jailtime.]<br><br> | |||
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=== Typical response to trolling with Nazis === | |||
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{{morphquote|TrollingNazis|background-color: white; width: 80%; height: auto;|font-weight: bold; | |||
|Quite obviously, the evidence presents approximately 23 million Jews were killed during WWII, and if you don't agree with that you are ignorant.|Ignorant Jew | |Quite obviously, the evidence presents approximately 23 million Jews were killed during WWII, and if you don't agree with that you are ignorant.|Ignorant Jew | ||
|Not gonna lie, this page is more than a little unsettling. I don't excuse those who have reacted to it with equal-yet-opposite hatred, but neither can I blame them. I want to think you don't believe in the things these symbols stand for, but I am not so naive to think it impossible. | |Not gonna lie, this page is more than a little unsettling. I don't excuse those who have reacted to it with equal-yet-opposite hatred, but neither can I blame them. I want to think you don't believe in the things these symbols stand for, but I am not so naive to think it impossible.| | ||
|Son of a BITCH! AFTER ALL THE NAZIS PUT THE JEWS AND OTHERS THROUGH, YOU SUPPORT THEM!? YOU'RE [[LOL WUT|NOYHING]] BUT A WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT!!!!! | |Son of a BITCH! AFTER ALL THE NAZIS PUT THE JEWS AND OTHERS THROUGH, YOU SUPPORT THEM!? YOU'RE [[LOL WUT|NOYHING]] BUT A WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!| | ||
|cant unterstand how and why people can be such obsessed with nazis. | |cant unterstand how and why people can be such obsessed with nazis. have you ever thought of all the kz victims for example? are you really so dumb? [[Propaganda|what are you taught in history there in the US?]]| | ||
have you ever thought of all the kz victims for example? | |The total estimated human loss of life caused by World War II was roughly 72 million people. The civilian toll was around 47 million, including 20 million deaths due to war related famine and disease. The military toll was about 25 million, including the deaths of about 5 million prisoners of war in captivity. [[Pwnt|The Allies lost about 61 million people, and the Axis lost 11 million.]] You are truly brainly if you can symphatize with such a great think like killing people for such a reason .. woke up Nazi| | ||
are you really so dumb? | |WTF you bich woke up or go out and find some boyfriend. Actually you so fuck uglly that you have no chance anyway I feel so sorry for you and please dont waste your time with repplying...| | ||
[[Propaganda|what are you taught in history there in the US?]] | |What's the point of being a Nazi if it's completley impossible for you to make a difference in society anymore. Everyone in the world that isn't a nazi hates you and most Nazis are just kids who read a lot about them and act like they do. Either that or they're racist towards jewish people.| | ||
|The total estimated human loss of life caused by World War II was roughly 72 million people. The civilian toll was around 47 million, including 20 million deaths due to war related famine and disease. The military toll was about 25 million, including the deaths of about 5 million prisoners of war in captivity. [[Pwnt|The Allies lost about 61 million people, and the Axis lost 11 million.]] | |Why can't you have national socialism without the swastikas? [[Why do you hate America?|And do you hate jews?]]| | ||
You are truly brainly if you can symphatize with such a great think like killing people for such a reason .. woke up Nazi | |||
|WTF you bich woke up or go out and find some boyfriend. Actually you so fuck uglly that you have no chance anyway I feel so sorry for you | |||
|What's the point of being a Nazi if it's completley impossible for you to make a difference in society anymore. Everyone in the world that isn't a nazi hates you and most Nazis are just kids who read a lot about them and act like they do. Either that or they're racist towards jewish people. | |||
|Why can't you have national socialism without the swastikas? [[Why do you hate America?|And do you hate jews?]] | |||
}} | }} | ||
<br> | |||
All of these quotes were taken exclusively from the comments in {{wayback|http://nihilss.deviantart.com/|20070911133910|title=one DA account}}. | |||
==How to troll Nazis== | |||
==How to | |||
[[Image:Friendly Nazi.jpg|thumb|What sane people (non-[[kikes]]) think all Nazis look like.]] | [[Image:Friendly Nazi.jpg|thumb|What sane people (non-[[kikes]]) think all Nazis look like.]] | ||
*Talk about your happy and successful interracial relationship. Be sure to post pics. | *[[Hegel#The master–slave dialectic|Invalidate hierarchy]] | ||
*Say you're a [[Communist]] or [[fucknut|Marxist]] | *Correct their [[Germany|German]]. When they write ''"Sieg heil"'' tell them that in German it is proper that both words be capitalized because they are both considered proper nouns. Sieg which means victory and Heil, health or reverence. When you say ''"Sieg Heil"'' you are literally saying ''"Victory, reverence and health to the German Reich"''. | ||
*Talk about your happy and successful interracial relationship. Be sure to post pictures. | |||
*Make sure to ask them, "If Nazis are so superior, why did they lose to a [[Nigger|Black Man]] (Jesse Owens) 4 times at the 1936 Berlin Olympics?" | |||
*Talk about your happy and successful homosexual relationship. Be sure to post pics. (Doesn't count if you're not white)! | |||
*Say you're a [[Communist]] or [[fucknut|Marxist]]: the other evil. | |||
*Say the Republican party and Christian churches don't like them. | *Say the Republican party and Christian churches don't like them. | ||
* | *Tell them that most neo-Nazis have an IQ of 85, so they're no different from a nigga. | ||
*Mention that the fact that all [[sluts|White girls]] have a innate, insatiable craving for a big | *Tell them that they are inbred. | ||
*Ask their opinion on [[Barack Obama]]. | *Remind them the real Aryans are Iranian/Indian people (again this proves Nazis have low IQs). | ||
*Inform them that the Nazis | *Rwmind tjem that hot, blonde, blue eyed and big titted Aryan girls, given a choice, would choose a well providing Jew any day over their trailor park, meth head, welfare ass. | ||
**And if they say the Nazis fought the | *Remind them the Swastika is an symbol Hitler stole again from the real Aryans. | ||
*Tell them Iran stands for the "Land of the Aryans". | |||
*Tell them Jews are superior people and own everything including the world. | |||
*Mention that the fact that all [[sluts|White girls]] have a innate, insatiable craving for a big black [[cock|cawk]] that no white man can satisfy. | |||
*Ask their opinion on [[Barack Obama]]. Bonus points if you get them arrested for making terrorist threats! | |||
*Inform them that the Nazis were Marxist/Socialist and that Hitler, like Marx, was just a [[White guilt|self-hating]] Jew. | |||
**And if they say the Nazis fought the Communists, tell them that was only because they were competing for the same [[You|pathetic excuses for human beings]] that [[Welfare|could not support themselves]] to recruit as mindless tools. | |||
***You can continue this line of thought and tell them that the cradle-to-grave welfare policies of the Nazis actually ''hurt'' the "[[Gay|Aryan]]" race by helping those that [[Evolution|should have been left to die at the side of the road]], which lets them pollute the gene [[Pool's Closed|pool]]. | ***You can continue this line of thought and tell them that the cradle-to-grave welfare policies of the Nazis actually ''hurt'' the "[[Gay|Aryan]]" race by helping those that [[Evolution|should have been left to die at the side of the road]], which lets them pollute the gene [[Pool's Closed|pool]]. | ||
*Remind them that if they hadn't driven Albert Einstein out of Germany, they might have won the war. | *Remind them that if they hadn't driven Albert Einstein out of Germany, they might have won the battle, but lost the war. | ||
*Say that it would be helpful to learn Spanish/Arabic/Chinese in Today's | *Say that it would be helpful to learn Spanish/Arabic/Chinese in Today's changing Society. | ||
*Ask how the weather is in [[Russia]]. | *Ask how the weather is in [[Russia]]. Bonus points if they're actually Russian and you mention how true Nazi ideology holds Slavs as [[Jews|inhuman beasts]]. | ||
*Suggest that their problems in obtaining gainful employment might not have so much to do with Jews and/or niggers and/or illegal immigration but perhaps may have more to do with the word HATE being tattooed across their forehead. | *Suggest that their problems in obtaining gainful employment might not have so much to do with Jews and/or niggers and/or illegal immigration but perhaps may have more to do with the word HATE being tattooed across their forehead. | ||
**Go one step further and suggest that a lot of their problems might originate from their dropping out of school in the fifth grade | |||
*Tell them that Arabs, not Jews did 9/11. | *Tell them that Arabs, not Jews did 9/11. | ||
** They really hate Arabs and Muslims too. | **They really hate Arabs and Muslims too. | ||
***Even though they allied with them during [[WWII]]. | ***Even though they allied with them during [[WWII]]. | ||
*Point out the fact that all | *Point out the fact that all neo-Nazis are non-German fucks who would have been killed by the SS. | ||
*Remind them of the fact that Rock, Metal, and every other genre that neo-Nazi bands ape is ultimately derived from Black American folk music. | *Remind them of the fact that Rock, Metal, and every other genre that neo-Nazi bands ape is ultimately derived from Black American folk music. | ||
*Say that Night by Elie Wiesel is a powerful and magnificent work of literature that everyone in the whole world should read. | *Say that Night by Elie Wiesel is a powerful and magnificent work of literature that everyone in the whole world should read. | ||
*Remind them that Jews are the smartest race, and black people are the strongest. | *Remind them that Jews are the smartest race, and black people are the strongest. Therefore the only master race would be a half black, half Jewish person. That's right, Lenny Kravitz is the new Führer! [[Goggles|Protective eyewear]] is suggested in case their brain explodes at the concept. | ||
*Ask why there are mass graves scattered across Eastern Europe full of Jewish bodies and German bullets. | *[[WTF|Ask why there are mass graves scattered across Eastern Europe full of Jewish bodies and German bullets.]] | ||
*Remind them that the estimated six million dead Jews is only a very rough estimate and that the number may be as high as over [[over 9000|eleven million]] (no shit, | *Remind them that the estimated six million dead Jews is only a very rough estimate and that the number may be as high as over [[over 9000|eleven million]] (no shit, Sherlock). | ||
**Remind them you couldn't tell Jews apart from most ''Aryan'' Germans. | **Remind them you couldn't tell Jews apart from most ''Aryan'' Germans with their pants up and their noses covered. | ||
**Explain how the word "Aryan", when used in the correct context, is a term used to describe the Indo-Iranian and Indo-European language groups, not a race of people. | **Explain how the word "Aryan", when used in the correct context, is a term used to describe the Indo-Iranian and Indo-European language groups, not a race of people. | ||
*Remind them that the 6 million Jews was less than a third of the total death count. | *Remind them that the 6 million Jews was less than a third of the total death count. | ||
*Ask them to explain the sudden complete disappearance of traditional Eastern European Jewish culture after World War II. | *Tell them Oswald Spengler was a communist. | ||
*Ask them if they're Jewish. | *Tell them Oswald Spengler thought racists, antisemitic people, and misogynists were imbeciles: | ||
*Discuss the finer aspects of Heinrich Himmler's | **"How much envy of the capability of other people in view of one's lack of it lies hidden in antisemitism!" | ||
* | **"When one would rather destroy business and scholarship than see Jews in them, one is an ideologue, a danger for the nation. Idiotic." | ||
* | *[[Israel|Ask them to explain the sudden complete disappearance of traditional Eastern European Jewish culture after World War II]]. | ||
*Inform them how America was inhabited by [[Native Americans|native red people]] and say that was genocide too. | *Ask them if they're Jewish. When they say no, respond with a sarcastic "Suuuuuure you're not!" Keep repeating until they assault you and/or admit their Jewish roots with a full Genographic Project test. | ||
*Kindly remind them that [ | *Discuss the finer aspects of Heinrich Himmler's '''{{archive|gVOp|speech at Poznan}}'''. Bonus points if you mention that Himmler was a total [[Assburgers|Aspie]] who eschewed figurative language! | ||
*Mention that Hitler is one of the most despised and | *Tell them that Goering was probably gay or a bisexual. | ||
*Tell them that Joseph Goebbels looked like a [[fag]] and had a kikeface. | |||
*Say [[Nietzsche]] was [[slav|Polish]], not German; even Nietzsche himself denied being German. In fact, he said that the only reason Germany was any good was because Germans had so much "Polish blood" in them. | |||
**Tell them, that Nietzsche considered proto-Nazis, antisemites and similar racists the greatest dumbfucks eva. | |||
*Inform them how America was inhabited by [[Native Americans|native red people]] and say that was genocide too. Bonus points if they don't realize that Hitler used that same argument against the Americans. | |||
*Kindly remind them that [[Wikipedia:Fred Leuchter|Fred Leuchter]] has only a BA in history (not science), has no engineering license, doesn't understand [[Zyklon B]], and has been [[pwned|proven wrong]] by experts with actual engineering degrees. | |||
*Mention that Hitler is one of the most [[popular|despised and hated]] figures of all time, and the fake propaganda they spread isn't going fool anybody to think otherwise. | |||
*The Holocaust really happened and is one of the most widely documented events in history. So get over it, fuckwit. | *The Holocaust really happened and is one of the most widely documented events in history. So get over it, fuckwit. | ||
*Tell them to [[retard|to come up with something original]]. If they tell you they came up with everything themselves, tell them [[Liar|"no you didn't retard"]]. | *Tell them to [[retard|to come up with something original]]. If they tell you they came up with everything themselves, tell them [[Liar|"no you didn't retard"]]. | ||
** Also tell them retards, cripples and handicapped were also killed in the T-4 Mental hospital eugenics program. | **Also tell them retards, cripples and handicapped were also killed in the T-4 Mental hospital eugenics program. Bonus points if they don't realize the connection with [[West Virginia|long term effects of inbreeding]]. | ||
* Ask them about why Hitler choose to raze Germany and not assist wounded German citizens in the last days of WWII. | *Ask them about why Hitler choose to raze Germany and not assist wounded German citizens in the last days of WWII. Bonus points if they don't bring up the concept of "honor". | ||
* Tell them how the film "Downfall" made you laugh and laugh.... | *Tell them how the film "Downfall" made you laugh and laugh.... | ||
* Ask them about Hitler's Jewish relatives and his failed efforts to cover them up. | *Ask them about Hitler's Jewish relatives and his failed efforts to cover them up. | ||
* Tell them how they act just like their stereotypes of other races. ie: black person, black person, black person, black person, [[welfare|etc]]. From that point on start referring to them as a [[skinhead|chalk/pale/white-washed nigger]] or something. | *Tell them how they act just like their stereotypes of other races. ie: black person, black person, black person, black person, [[welfare|etc]]. From that point on start referring to them as a [[skinhead|chalk/pale/white-washed nigger]] or something. | ||
* Remind them that Rotmistrov outmaneuvered Nazi tank commanders at Kursk. Bonus points if you hint that Rotmistrov had Jewish blood. | *Remind them that Rotmistrov outmaneuvered Nazi tank commanders at Kursk. Bonus points if you hint that Rotmistrov had Jewish blood. | ||
* Remind them that their women were rightfully raped by the Red Army, which treated all people, (including blacks, Jews and Asians | *Tell them that Nazi tank commanders believed that [[LOLWUT|running over Camel shit was a sign of luck.]] Then tell them the Allies made bombs camouflaged as Camel dung. (It worked) | ||
* Post this rap | *Remind them that the Jagdpanzer was the most retarded tank of all time. | ||
*Call a [[KKK]] member a white nigger (if he's Irish or Italian). If they're Irish, remind them that they come from coward stock because Southern Ireland was too afraid to join WW2 and that they are the garbage of Northern Europe, way beneath the Darkest Skinned Sicilian. If they're Southern Italian, remind them of their [[Nigger|Black]] blood that comes from the Moors invading and explains why their skin is darker and they have more afro like hair compared to lighter skinned, straight haired and sometimes blonde Northern Italians. | |||
*Remind them that their women were rightfully raped by the Red Army, which treated all people, (including blacks, Jews, and Asians) except Nazi females, as equals. | |||
*Post '''{{ytlink|gewdaLQ31lo|this rap}}''' | |||
*tell them that they're a degenerate drain on the white race and that they use white supremacy as an excuse to ride the coattails of [[Dick Cheney|proper white people]]. | *tell them that they're a degenerate drain on the white race and that they use white supremacy as an excuse to ride the coattails of [[Dick Cheney|proper white people]]. | ||
*tell them you're black. | *tell them you're black. | ||
** or Jewish! | **or Jewish! | ||
*Say that the Nazis were too gay to shoot the Jews, and had to sneakily gas them instead. | |||
*Say that 14/88 stands for 88 being a neo-Nazi's average IQ and fourteen being the average age that their mother had conceived them. | |||
*Tell them you want them to be proud of their white skin, not in some moronic cult government kind of way but the way that any pretty-boy should when you're staring at his luscious pink nipples thinking about how pretty he'd look with two feet of long ginger hair while you're frotting him. | |||
*Tell them how badly they got their pathetic useless asses kicked in the war especially by the USA. | |||
*Mention how Oscar Schindler despite being a Nazi, saved Jews instead of killing them. | |||
*Tell them [[retard|their kind]] would have been killed in Aktion T4. | |||
==Videos== | |||
<br> | |||
<center>{{frame|<youtube>olU40fxAXZs</youtube> | |||
<center>'''The fascist national anthem'''|border=red}}</center> | |||
<br> | |||
==Gallery== | ==Gallery== | ||
{{cg|Die Galerie| | <br> | ||
{{cg|'''Die Galerie'''|HEILNAZI|center|<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:Jew buttons.png | |||
File:Anime_furry_nazis.jpg|Even the gay furries are Nazis. | |||
File:Nazi Teamwork.jpg|Nazis were big on teamwork | |||
</gallery>|<gallery> | File:Pram.jpg|Absolutely, totally, definitely [[Lie|NOT GAY]] | ||
File:Snow fight.jpg|Shoving snow down the ass of your fellow soldier, the official pastime of the Wehrmacht. | |||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:Oh, Jurgen! You Are Such Ze Joker, Ja!.jpg|"Oh, Jurgen! You are such ze joker, ja?" | |||
File:Captains SS.png| Captain SS | |||
File:Naziyay.jpg|Yay! | |||
File:Germany-Poland.png|BAWWWW | |||
File:Hey, Wanna Play.jpg | |||
File:Fuggocaust.png | |||
File:Nazitoyou.jpg|JEW.... | |||
File:Skyrimnazivsjew.jpg | |||
File:Blitzkreig.jpg | |||
File:Nazisalute.gif | |||
File:Nazibaby.jpg | |||
File:Based-roseanne-bakes-burnt-jew-cookies-31916002.png | |||
File:When Whites Get Pushed Too Far.jpg | |||
File:Curbstomp Party Hard.gif | |||
File:Don't Make The White Kids Angry.jpg | |||
File:Age Of Empires Nazi Farm.jpg|German farmland, 1939 | |||
File:Nazifigma.jpg | |||
File:Nazi Crew.jpg | |||
File:Nazi BMO.png | |||
File:Nazi Lego Kit.jpg | |||
File:Nazi Diglett.png|Hitler's pokemon :3 | |||
File:Nazi Koffing.png | |||
File:CN Nazi Flag.png | |||
File:Taketheredpill.png | |||
File:Redvsbluepill.png | |||
File:Hitler's New Furniture.jpg | |||
File:Yepdasjuden.jpg | |||
File:Mengele.jpg|Japan loves Nazis | |||
File:Ducknazi.jpg|[[Disney]] does as well. | File:Ducknazi.jpg|[[Disney]] does as well. | ||
File:No more kitten around!.JPG | |||
File:Hitlerheightlimit.jpg | |||
File:Nazi Kid.jpg | |||
File:NaziReichsadler.png | |||
File:Kawaii Goebbels.jpg|Goebbels ist [[Kawaii]]!!!!! | |||
File:'Oh, Mr. Hitler, You Are Ze Real Character!'.jpg|Hitler sharing a joke with friends. Possibly about Jews. | |||
File:Nazicapcat.jpg | |||
File:NaziGrill.jpg | |||
File:Nazilegoguy.jpg | |||
File:Nazilego.jpg | |||
File:Nazi For fuck's sake.jpg|Cock goes where? | |||
File:Pure evil poster.jpg|[[Fact]] | |||
File:Fanboy Goebbels Says, 'I LOVE YOU, Mein Führer...'.jpg|Fanboy Goebbels says, "I LOVE YOU, Mein Führer!" | |||
File:Whitechimpout.jpg|What happens when Whites [[Chimpout]] | |||
File:Cute blitzkreig.PNG | |||
File:Christmas sucks.jpg | |||
File:Film18 0011.JPG|[[Kike]] [[cunt]] [[cosplay|cosplaying]] as a Nazi and [[asking for it]]. | |||
File:Halt Hammerzeit.jpg|The proof that Niggers stole Breakdance from the Germanz. | |||
File:Jewsforhitler.jpg|Ubersecret SS unit | |||
File:Bitchplease.JPG | |||
File:Heinrich Lederhosen.jpg|Heinrich Himmler being a sexy bitch. | |||
File:Amazing cape.jpg|Hermann Goering was one [[gay|stylish]] [[fatass|motherfucker]]. | |||
File:Seksie.jpg|You will never be as sexy as Reinhard Heydrich was, go kill yourself already. You know you never will. He was the fucking sexiest man EVAR. | |||
File:Hello nazi.jpg|Heil Kitty! | |||
File:Reich time.gif | |||
File:Wheel barrow a.jpg | |||
File:Nazicake48.jpg | |||
File:Chikinz.png | |||
File:Bird Reich.jpg|What nazis like to eat (aside from freshly tossed [[Anus|salad]] | |||
File:Coolest uniforms.jpg | |||
File:Little horse.jpg | |||
File:Hilarious.PNG | |||
File:Police-State fpa.gif | |||
File:ComCapNat.jpg | |||
File:Amazingswasika.jpeg | |||
File:Getoutmycountryyy.jpg | |||
File:Jewkikery.jpg | |||
File:Naziflag3.gif | |||
File:Nazijap.jpg | |||
File:Nazipizza.jpg | |||
File:Neonazitroubles.jpg | |||
File:Happy birthday.gif | |||
File:Peanut butter heil time.gif | |||
File:Kitty in boot.jpg|brb, endsieg | |||
File:Nazis with Kitten.JPG|Nazis pioneered Caturday. | |||
File:Vheelie.jpg | |||
File:Teddy bear.jpg|Yes, the teddy bear is white, but it's also [[Jewish]]. | |||
File:Nazigaymarriage.jpg|LOL WUT | |||
File:Swast.jpg|Light, love and Jews | |||
File:SSPanzerCrew.jpg | |||
File:Jew bears.jpg | |||
File:Krieg.jpg | |||
File:Cieling_cat_deutsch.jpg | |||
File:Prince harry naziCrop2.jpg|LOL England | |||
File: | File:holoc.jpg|BUY IT | ||
</gallery>}} | File:Crosstika.gif|[[Christians]] are well known Nazis. | ||
File:844CAA8Ad01.jpg|Hanging innocent nurses, a favorite Nazi pastime. | |||
File:Nazi_thread.jpg|[[b/|/b/]] tries to reanimate the Nazi Party. | |||
File:Native American Nazi basketball team.jpg|Native Americans were the first Nazis. | |||
File:The_secret_weapon_of_the_SS_-_sassy_lips.jpg|Hello, sugah! | |||
File:Thisreich-medium.jpg|LOL, this Reich. | |||
File:Goldstar.jpg | |||
File:Orangejews.jpg | |||
File:Turngason.png | |||
==See | File:Deusvult.jpg | ||
File:Nazipepeworship.jpg | |||
File:Nazisexualassault.gif | |||
File:Rightwingdeathsquads.jpg | |||
File:Swasticookies.jpg|Nazi grandma or metaphor for putting Nazis in the oven? | |||
File:Nazi_BMW_Logo.png|German car maker. | |||
File:nazidiversity.jpg|Promoting racial diversity since 1939. | |||
File:Mortalenema.jpg | |||
File:Welcome to Germany.jpg | |||
File:Waffle-ss.jpg | |||
File:CAH Nazis.png | |||
File:Gas-who.jpg | |||
File:Wait+i+change+my+mind+i+can+t+find+gas+who+ 3f0b7c912cf1c3ecff498ddfedb17d64.jpg | |||
File:Put them back in the oven.jpg | |||
File:Nazi jew girl.jpg | |||
File:NaziHammertime.jpg | |||
File:Swastika.jpg | |||
File:Nazi1resize.jpg | |||
File:Swastika-game-lg.jpg | |||
File:Nazi-plumber.jpg | |||
File:Div 10474542800.jpg | |||
</gallery>|}} | |||
<br> | |||
<center>'''{{archive|5HL8k|more images}}'''</center> | |||
<br> | |||
{{cg|'''Pro-Nazi Propaganda'''|HILEHITLR|center|<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:Sam Hyde Nazi.jpg | |||
File:Naziyoukilledus.png | |||
File:Todderluge.jpg|Death to the lies! | |||
File:Fighttheaxis.png | |||
File:Igenuinelyappreciatehitler.png | |||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:National socialism vs democracy.jpg|Democracies are for [[faggot|FAGGOTS]]. | |||
File:NATION.png | |||
File:Whathaveyoubeencalledtoday.png | |||
File:Judeneternaldarkness.jpg | |||
File:GoebbelsKILLJEWS.jpg | |||
File:Jinroh1.jpg | |||
File:Jinroh2.gif | |||
File:Hitlerquote812381231.jpg | |||
File:Naziquote81238721.jpg | |||
File:Nazipride8123812.jpg | |||
File:Shakehandshitler.jpg | |||
File:Capcomfaclii.jpg | |||
File:Totenkopfflag.jpg | |||
File:Politicalcensorship.jpg | |||
File:Lotofnaziguy.jpg | |||
File:Naziquote18273721.jpg | |||
File:Whileamericaslept.jpg | |||
File:Degeneratescale.jpg | |||
File:Goebbelgoy.jpg | |||
File:88naziparade.jpg | |||
File:Realityofauchwitz.jpg | |||
File:Naziliterature.jpg | |||
File:Nazistereotypes.jpg | |||
</gallery>|}} | |||
<br> | |||
==See also== | |||
[[image:Ae.gif|thumb|æ is a cover up.]] | |||
*[[卐]] | *[[卐]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Adolf Hitler]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Apple]] | ||
*[[Alt-right]] | |||
*[[Billy The Heretic]] | *[[Billy The Heretic]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Conservatives]] | ||
*[[Deadliest Warrior]] | |||
*[[Democrats]] | |||
*[[DevianTart Nazis]] | |||
*[[Facism]] | |||
*[[Fifty Hitler Post]] | *[[Fifty Hitler Post]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Godwin's Law]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Hal Turner]] | ||
*[[He Jiankui]] | |||
*[[Heath Campbell]] | |||
*[[Hetalia]] | |||
*[[Holocaust]] | *[[Holocaust]] | ||
*[[Holocaust denial]] | *[[Holocaust denial]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Nigger|Jesse Owens]] Black man credited with "single-handedly crushing Hitler's myth of Aryan supremacy". | ||
*[[ | *[[The Jewish Question|Jewish Question, The]] | ||
*[[KKK]] | *[[KKK]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Liberalism]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Metapedia.org]] | ||
*[[Navi]] | |||
*[[Republicans]] | *[[Republicans]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Roger Waters]] | ||
*[[The Church of Creativity]] | |||
*[[Viking]] | |||
*[[White nationalism]] – The politically correct version of Nazism | |||
*[[WWII]] | |||
== External links == | |||
[[File:Heil hitler head-desk.gif|right|200px]] | |||
*<s>{{yt|dev21a|A neonazi weeaboo's youtube page}} ← '''Not a troll''' (Not available in [[Israel]]).</s> | |||
*{{yt|chrscool8|Neo-Nazi Aspie}} | |||
*{{wayback|http://www.resistance.com/forum/index.php|20050204020303|title=White pride forum - troll daily.}} | |||
*[https://www.stormfront.org/forum/ Stormfront - drama-filled even by Nazi standards] That's fucking saying something. | |||
*'''{{archive|fV4hA|Scripture forbids mixing of races.}}''' | |||
*<s>[http://ironmarch.org/ Iron March Forums]</s> (shut down) | |||
*<s>[http://tinychat.com/thirdposition ThirdPosition Chatroom]</s> (gone) | |||
<br> | |||
{{Politics}} | |||
{{Nazis}} | {{Nazis}} | ||
{{trolls}} | {{trolls}} | ||
{{truth}} | {{truth}} | ||
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]] | [[Category:Drama-generating techniques]] | ||
[[ | [[Category:Nazis| ]] | ||
[[ | [[Category:People]] | ||
[[ | [[Category:Subcultures]] | ||
[[ | [[Category:Epithets]] | ||
[[Category:Germany]] | |||
[[Category:You]] | |||
{{timeline|[[ED:AOTN|Featured Article]] April 19 & 20, [[2024]]|[[WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE?]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Mangs]]}} |
Latest revision as of 16:39, 25 August 2024
please click here and slowly scroll down to the bottom of the page. |
A Nazi, or National Socialist, aka wikipedia part of Wikimedia Foundation aka WMFOffice is a member of the Nationalsozialistischen Deutschen Arbeiterpartei religion and a follower of its ideology. Nazis came to power in Germany at least 100 years ago under the wise leadership of Adolf Hitler who loved wikijews. For teh lulz, they went and took over Europe and allegedly killed over 12,000,000,000,000 Untermenschen. Chances are if a loser, buttfucking person like you lived in Germany around that time, then you would be rightfully pwned as well, especially if you are a kike, fag, nigga, retard, or fattie. Because of this, Nazis are pure good and you must show your support of all things Nazi at every given opportunity. If anyone shows the slightest interest in the Third Reich in history or National Socialism as a political theory, or even spiffy uniforms, you must assist them in any way possible.
Could you imagine what type of shit hole we would be living in if they hadn't killed all those Jews? There would be Jews everywhere! Let's be nice and say only 12 million were killed (which wasn't enough): they would have multiplied like Asian bunnies. It is a known fact that Jews are the cause of all the world's problems. We would be driving flying cars powered by the earth's energy, no Ben Stiller movies, and maybe you wouldn't be so fucking poor, along with knowing the fact that when shit hits the fan and the world is about to be fucked, that's when some Jew kyke basterds will be in a space ship sipping kosher bud light because their ancestors spent their entire time on earth trying to JEW YOU HARD.
Instructions
- Invoke an internal and external enemy.
- Create secret prisons where torture takes place.
- Develop a thug caste or paramilitary force not answerable to citizens.
- Set up an internal surveillance system.
- Harass citizens' groups.
- Engage in arbitrary detention and release.
- Target key individuals.
- Control the press.
- Preheat oven to 1,488° Fahrenheit.
- Treat all political dissidents as traitors.
- Suspend the rule of law.
- ???
- PROFIT!
Nazi ideology
During the 1920s and 1930s Homosexuality was dubbed the "German Vice". The Nazi party and especially the Schutzstaffel (SS) attracted young Aryan homosexuals to join their lines and cover it up with BS politics. The Nazi party therefore became the biggest gay organization in Europe. (Gay rights were invented in Nazi Germany, as were animal and furry rights, and the lack of rights for smokers.) To cover up their faggotry, they had to kill men as much as they fuck them. This was convenient, as a scapegoat could serve both the gay mafia and the general populace's demand for redemption, as follows:
It's the Jews' fault. All of it. Lose a war? Jews. Country in a massive economic depression? Jews. Can't escape this overwhelming feeling of powerlessness and futility? Jews. Michael Jackson die? Jews. Step in some dog crap? Jew dog. It's all simple. The only effective weapon against the Jewish threat is the righteous Aryan nations rallying under Adolf Hitler. Hitler is awesome and Hitler will solve all your problems.
The only flaw in killing the Jews was the gas chamber. If Hitler didn't use the gas chamber, but chopped the corpses into Eukanuba, who knows how much money he could have earned. Maybe he could have gotten rid of another lesser race like the niggers. If he wiped out all the niggers, then maybe we wouldn't deal with the shit that niggers make.
To properly live as a Nazi, one must constantly wear the right sexy uniform. Men must be clean, live well and be totally not gay. To show how proud they are of their white skin, they should mark it all up in a mass of black ugly tattoos of swastikas, SS, Hitler, runic letter Z, dumbass numerical c0dez for secret slogans like "14-7" and "88", shamrocks, and whatever other shit they can come up with to cover up all the white bits until nobody can tell they belong to an inferior race just by looking at them. Women must make healthy Aryan babies. Lots and lots of healthy Aryan babies. Women have only one good hole so they should keep it in top shape!
Nazis founded a political ideology of and Antisemitism, Anticommoonism, and far-right doctrine that on paper sounded utterly retarded. However, by implementing free market capitalistic ideas as government-sponsored economic programs, government-sponsored development of infrastructure, government ideological indoctrination groups, and government-sponsored violent coercion, the Nazis were able to unite Germany around it. As in reality Communism does not work, everyone knows that the Nazis really rebuilt the economy by redistributing all the gold they stole from the Jews.
Put your left-wing out, do the hokey pokey
While many believe the Nazis were far-right extremists, they were also indisputably left-wing extremists. Besides the obvious, they were socialists who hated capitalism. Now this might seem fucking obvious to anyone who ever considered the deeper meaning behind National Socialist Party and the bit where the Nazis wanted to redistribute all the phat loots from the Jews. But obviously, politics is very complicated. The confusion isn't helped by the fact people are fucking stupid, we're living in the Matrix, and lizard men control the earth. These lizard men are waiting for the one true thinker to arise—this person, be they man, woman, or furry, will answer this haunting enigma so we can all go home, and they can get back to resurrecting Hitler as Microsoft Hitler 3.1.
Famous Nazis
Heinrich Himmler
Moar info: Heinrich Himmler.
Himmler was the Reichsführer of the SS and all of its aspects. Himmler was the model Aryan superman, with his slanted, chinky eyes and his weak chin. Himmler was a complete sperg that no one in the party actually liked. But you know what they say, successful organization is complete without a totally obsessed, hard-working aspie and Heinrich Himmler was Hitler's favorite aspie. His hobbies included gardening, Neo-Pagan mysticism, serving his Führer, and genocide. Before joining the Nazis he farmed chikkinz, LOL. Rumor has it that he was secretly part gook and a homosexual
Artur Axmann
Axmann was the second leader of the Hitler Youth (Reichsjugendführer) from 1940 to 1945. Born in Hagen on 18 February 1913. He studied law and in 1928, founded the first Hitler Youth group in Westphalia.
Marty Bormann
Bormann was the personal secretary to the Führer, and as such had total control of his life: Every piece of information and request that went to the Führer was vetted by him - and every order out was too, and was called by some the real Führer. STFU, BORMANN, NOBODY LIKES YOU. Some people believe that he went missing. Allegedly, Bormann was actually an irl troll who was a soviet secret agent the whole time, the suspicions lie at the fact that his dead body has never been found and that he was nowhere to be found nearby at the end of the days of the Reich. Some say he escaped from the fuhrerbunker to Moscow to report back to the Soviet intelligence agency, getting congratulated on a job well done subverting and completely derping the Reich to destruction.
Joseph Goebbels
Moar info: Joseph Goebbels.
Goebbels was the propaganda Minister and official emo child of the 3rd Reich. A long mysterious childhood illness left him with a limp and standing only about 5 ft. tall and weighing only about 100 pounds soaking wet, thus making him ideal for storing in tight spaces as well as totally and unrepentantly KAWAII. He was totally ghey for Hitler, so much so that together they proved their emosity and made a suicide pact that just so happened to also include Goebbels's wife and six kids.
Hermann Göring
Moar info: Hermann Göring.
Göring, after becoming a major aviation hero in the First World War, joined the National Socialist movement, pissed off the government, and got briefly exiled to Sweden. There, he got addicted to morphine and became a raging fatass. He returned to Germany and became president of the Reichstag under Hitler and Field Marshall of one of the greatest air forces in history and still got pwned by the RAF.
Reinhard Heydrich
Heydrich was the chief of the Gestapo and SD spy network. He was and still is considered by many to be the symbol of the perfect Nazi. He was tall, handsome, and very very Aryan; an accomplished violinist and fencer, and all-around alpha male who would sleep with your girlfriend and have you arrested for faggotry. Also the one prominent Nazi who very likely may have been part Jew. LOL, irony. Actually, this makes sense because Heydrich had a knack for orchestrating fake attacks for his own personal political gain. Heydrich`s personality also had all the similarites with a typical Jew, being cunning and manipulative.
Erich Priebke
Priebke was a Hauptsturmführer in Italy, particularly Rome. When 33 Nazi's were killed by a resistance movement called the Italian Resistance Priebke applied a rule in which ten Jews were killed for every killed Nazi, ten times 33 being 330, he didn't kill 330, but 335! OMFG. This created mass butthurt amongst people who weren't born in the war but still did care. After the losing the war, he fled to Argentinia where he lived for about fifty years. But after this time people were still butthurt and didn't forget about the World War, even when they weren't born in it or were as old to remember it, so they prosecuted an 81-year-old man to gain satisfaction.
Josef Kramer
Pappa J-Kramer was Commandant of the Bergen-Belson concentration camp. He had the sickest nick-name, which was "The Beast of Belsen" although Kramer was naughty and was responsible for the deaths of thousands. He was a Nazi war criminal. He was born in Munich and he joined the Nazi Party in 1931 also before Bergen-Belsen he was a Hauptsturmfuhrer of Auschwitz and was in charge of the gas chambers. When Bergen Belsen was liberated by the tea-drinkers, he actual gave them a tour around the camp, he was then arrested. They say he was trailed and hanged for his war crimes. They are wrong. He later on went to become the popular character Kramer in a famous American sitcom called Seinfeld.
Eva Braun
Braun was Hitler's personal Jewish faghag.
Can be exploited for trolling Nazis for great Lulz.
Rudolf Hess
Hess was the King of eyebrows. He was Hitler's right-hand man up until the eve of the invasion of Russia when he decided to fly to England and try negotiating a peace settlement without telling anybody. Hitler was not amused. The next time Hess made a major public appearance he was on trial at Nuremberg, counting his fingers repetitively and laughing at inappropriate moments.
Hess's views on the whole incident: page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Blondi
Blondi was Hitler's canine companion. Proof that getting a dog doesn't always work. This also fueled rumors about Hitler preferring furries to his wife Eva. More rumors also state that Blondi was actually a fur coat for his beloved Mudkips.
Claus Philipp Maria Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg
Claus Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg was a German army officer Jew. With a totally sweet eyepatch, he quickly became one of the Third Reich's most feared men. Unfortunately, he became butthurt when Hitler tried to turn Germany something he did not like, so he hatched a treasonous plot to kill Hitler with a bomb in a briefcase left at one of Hitler's strategy meetings. This was easier said than done, because Stauffenberg was missing his right hand and had only three fingers on his left hand, which would have made fapping extremely hard. Unfortunately, some oblivious douche kicked the briefcase and the explosion was fucked up so that Hitler only lost his pants, and not his life. Long story short, someone ratted Stauffenberg out, and he was hunted down and pwned by firing squad the day after the July 20 plot.
In the end, all Stauffenberg managed to accomplish was to murder an innocent stenographer and fail in his ultimate mission. Despite that, he is celebrated in Germany today, even though he was a colossal failure.
Josef Mengele
Moar info: Josef Mengele.
Mengele was a true pioneer in doing it for the lulz. Young Josef Mengele (also known as Mengy-kun, Bishie Queen Of The SS) was a new doctor happily working away at his genetic research when suddenly the evil spewing from his magnificent toothy gap told him it would be fun to go mutilate Jews in the name of science. Because of his hard work and dedication, the world now knows that you cannot change someone's eye color by injecting them with bleach, that sitting in cold water for a long time will indeed kill you slowly, that people die when you rip out their organs, and that just because you've sewn them together doesn't mean they're Siamese twins.
Amon Goeth
Online Nazis
Contemporary (Neo) Nazis
Back in the day, Nazis were supposed to be the apex of humanity. They were educated, cultured and dignified. However, nowadays, neo nazis are the second most backward class of mankind after niggers. If you come across a neo nazi, they are likely to resemble these fine, genetically superior examples of humanity:
Previous Video | Next Video |
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WHITE POWER!
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Neo nazis are Untermenschen
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Neo nazis are Untermenschen
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Neo nazis are Untermenschen
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Can you smell irony in this picture?
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Pissed off or constipated?
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Typical stormfag dwelling on stormfront in his secret neo-Nazi basement
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Cry moar sheckelshtein
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what in the hell...
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Neo nazis can triforce now
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Richard Dawkins is a notable neo nazi
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Even pokemon are neo nazis now
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Alleged neo-nazi tends to his lawn
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An emo neonazi fag from 4chan
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Generic Neo-Nazi
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Nazis don't need girls to have fun.
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Nazis shouldn't be doing that
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Reading Mein Kampf and playing with his Hitler.
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A Nazi's PC.
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Japanese Nazi.
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Anonanazi
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Rastanazi
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Not even your math teacher is safe.
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/pol/
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Justin Bieber is a Nazi.
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ARYANS UNITE!!!!
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How Nazis hail taxicabs.
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Dumb Bitch. She's also holding an Israeli weapon, typical Blond Nazi.
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WHITE LIVES MATTER
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WLM
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WLM STILL MATTER
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Some protest..
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All modern day Nazis are fat.
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LOL WUT
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They come in black too
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black person PWNING a red supremacist?
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LOL, silly skinhead, that sort of thing will get you sent to camp!
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Some modern Nazis happen to be black person than others, though not for the lack of trying.
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Nazis Gone Wild.
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Nazis are also well known camwhores.
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Anarchy=no government control, Nazi=complete government control. These guys represent the total destruction of their own fascist ideology
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Totally not gay.
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Not gay Nazis are gay fetish.
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Neither are these.
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Chinks were Nazis, too! (Note: failstika)
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Adolf Saakashvili Detected
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The facial expression NEVAR changes.
If Hitler was alive today and saw his modern followers or Deutschland, he'd shoot himself again.
Modern day Nazis and their assorted brethren make for astounding targets for trolling. Dealing with the fact that they have been largely reduced to hapless anachronisms, they tend to band together for shelter in the far corners of the Internet, such as on sites like Daily Stormer, Stormfront and other FBI honeypots. That, plus they're mostly a bunch of drunken degenerate idiots who are absolutely convinced that they are 100% right and will quite loudly tell you how right they are. They often fail to realize that racism is a learned behavior, not a deep-seated biological survival instinct, and presenting them with any genetic and racial science newer then 1965 will cause them to promptly shit brix and go into an autistic fit of Righteous Aryan Rage.
Whereas the original Nazis actually maintained their Germanic culture, celebrating, appreciating and reveling in German art, literature and music, modern day Nazis get their culture by listening to a lot of shitty White Power Rock'n'Roll. Never mind the fact that rock'n'roll is essentially African-American folk music borrowed by the White Man, and that "borrowing" something from another culture is the purest definition of multiculturalism, and that Hitler devoted an entire chapter of Mein Kampf describing how the degradation of Aryan culture would lead to the extinction of the white man.
Often, modern Nazis will tell you how they are not about hate. Because trying to form an All-White purified European culture and exterminating any non-whites or people who disagree with you is all about love and tolerance.
The new Nazis hate Muslims more than Jews (just ask Sweden) even though Hitler admired and allied with Muslim peoples and even considered their religion superior to Christianity.
— National Alliance front page, basically admitting to inbreeding with close relatives |
— Nazi Kid on Jews |
2 of 3 Nazi Übermensch are actually Jewish. Boris Becker and Scarlett Johansson Pathetic aryans.
/b/tards
In 1993, an undercover Jew discovered /b/tards having a secret club meeting:
Thais
Sacred Heart Preparatory School, a christian school in Chiang Mai found out a way to cosplay without dressing up like bargirl versions of pop-cultural characters. How? By dressing up like nazis, of course:
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But where's the rest of the parade?
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PEW-PEW-PEW!
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Sieg Fail!
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Heil SpongeBob Squarepants! Innocent aryan sungod of the east!
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My, that's a nice dress. Probably the nicest dress in SE Asia since the french left Vietnam.
Nazi achievements
Nazis ruled Germany for ten years, yet their only long lasting achievement which benefited their race was the production of the Volkswagen Beetle (Which is pretty shit anyway and the blueprints are from Czechoslovakia which the Nazis stole, that means they're also stealing Jews). The Nazis also managed to create the lulziest war ever, and managed to get a high score of 6,000,000 kills, but was defeated by the final boss Russia. The Russians then proceeded to deport sixteen million Prussians from their stolen third of Germany... in cattle trains and using them as extras impersonating yids for the production of the Schindler's List. After the Worldwide success of the film everything Nazi became culturally frowned upon; with the following exceptions.
Culturally acceptable Nazis
- Alfred Rosenberg – Philanthropist.
- David von Gurion – heavy duty runway.
- Herbert von Karajan – Too long; didn't listen.
- Leni Riefenstahl – Scuba diver, photographer, hot bitch, gerontological proof of Aryan superiority.
- Wernher von Braun – Nazis in space!
- Kurt Waldheim – A Nazi who actually ran the whole world
- Pope Benedict XVI – Nazi pope
- Carl Jung; Once philosemite whose fetish turned to extreme rage after falling out with Freud, then a recanting of views after the Nazis lost.
- Hugo Boss (see right)
Other ways to be a Nazi
- Feminazi
- Grammar Nazi
- Nazi Fur
- Pants Nazi
- Scientology (wait...did we just Godwinded Scientology? Way to fucking go Anon...)
- Secret Nazi
- Wikipedian - Promoter of fascism and "improvement of the project" over self-esteem.
- Zionist
Trolling with Nazis
- Say you're interested in National Socialism as a political philosophy.
- That Hitler was right.
- That Hitler was great.
- Act like you're a Nazi but claim to be totally against their ideas.
- Suggest that the estimated 6 million dead may be exaggerated.
- Go to YouTube. Search a documentary on the Holocaust and comment "Happy New Year from Germany".
- Point out that there were more non-Jews killed by the Nazis in their "ethnic cleansing" plan than Jews. (You'll be accused of being an antisemitic Nazi yourself. Sense. It makes none.)
- Mention that the Nazis actually did do a few good things for Germany (building the autobahn, saving the country from complete economic collapse, restoring national pride, etc.)
- Put a swastika somewhere.
- Do something vaguely Nazi-ish.
- Shaving your head automatically makes you a Nazi suspect.
- Explain how Hitler was damn good at motivating people to do his bidding.
- Point out that the Nazis, especially the SS, had the best uniforms ever.
- Accuse someone of being a Nazi and/or compare their actions to those of the Nazis.
- srsly, do something with Nazis that isn't 100% NAZIS R BAD and just watch the flames come rolling in.
- Create a Failbook Fan-Page for your local Nazi member of Parliament
[1](gone), and laugh when they try and sue your broke ass! - State that as of June 2024, it is a legally-determined fact that IRL pwning one Jew will only get you 15 minutes of jailtime.
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Typical response to trolling with Nazis
—Ignorant Jew |
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All of these quotes were taken exclusively from the comments in one DA account.
How to troll Nazis
- Invalidate hierarchy
- Correct their German. When they write "Sieg heil" tell them that in German it is proper that both words be capitalized because they are both considered proper nouns. Sieg which means victory and Heil, health or reverence. When you say "Sieg Heil" you are literally saying "Victory, reverence and health to the German Reich".
- Talk about your happy and successful interracial relationship. Be sure to post pictures.
- Make sure to ask them, "If Nazis are so superior, why did they lose to a Black Man (Jesse Owens) 4 times at the 1936 Berlin Olympics?"
- Talk about your happy and successful homosexual relationship. Be sure to post pics. (Doesn't count if you're not white)!
- Say you're a Communist or Marxist: the other evil.
- Say the Republican party and Christian churches don't like them.
- Tell them that most neo-Nazis have an IQ of 85, so they're no different from a nigga.
- Tell them that they are inbred.
- Remind them the real Aryans are Iranian/Indian people (again this proves Nazis have low IQs).
- Rwmind tjem that hot, blonde, blue eyed and big titted Aryan girls, given a choice, would choose a well providing Jew any day over their trailor park, meth head, welfare ass.
- Remind them the Swastika is an symbol Hitler stole again from the real Aryans.
- Tell them Iran stands for the "Land of the Aryans".
- Tell them Jews are superior people and own everything including the world.
- Mention that the fact that all White girls have a innate, insatiable craving for a big black cawk that no white man can satisfy.
- Ask their opinion on Barack Obama. Bonus points if you get them arrested for making terrorist threats!
- Inform them that the Nazis were Marxist/Socialist and that Hitler, like Marx, was just a self-hating Jew.
- And if they say the Nazis fought the Communists, tell them that was only because they were competing for the same pathetic excuses for human beings that could not support themselves to recruit as mindless tools.
- You can continue this line of thought and tell them that the cradle-to-grave welfare policies of the Nazis actually hurt the "Aryan" race by helping those that should have been left to die at the side of the road, which lets them pollute the gene pool.
- And if they say the Nazis fought the Communists, tell them that was only because they were competing for the same pathetic excuses for human beings that could not support themselves to recruit as mindless tools.
- Remind them that if they hadn't driven Albert Einstein out of Germany, they might have won the battle, but lost the war.
- Say that it would be helpful to learn Spanish/Arabic/Chinese in Today's changing Society.
- Ask how the weather is in Russia. Bonus points if they're actually Russian and you mention how true Nazi ideology holds Slavs as inhuman beasts.
- Suggest that their problems in obtaining gainful employment might not have so much to do with Jews and/or niggers and/or illegal immigration but perhaps may have more to do with the word HATE being tattooed across their forehead.
- Go one step further and suggest that a lot of their problems might originate from their dropping out of school in the fifth grade
- Tell them that Arabs, not Jews did 9/11.
- They really hate Arabs and Muslims too.
- Even though they allied with them during WWII.
- They really hate Arabs and Muslims too.
- Point out the fact that all neo-Nazis are non-German fucks who would have been killed by the SS.
- Remind them of the fact that Rock, Metal, and every other genre that neo-Nazi bands ape is ultimately derived from Black American folk music.
- Say that Night by Elie Wiesel is a powerful and magnificent work of literature that everyone in the whole world should read.
- Remind them that Jews are the smartest race, and black people are the strongest. Therefore the only master race would be a half black, half Jewish person. That's right, Lenny Kravitz is the new Führer! Protective eyewear is suggested in case their brain explodes at the concept.
- Ask why there are mass graves scattered across Eastern Europe full of Jewish bodies and German bullets.
- Remind them that the estimated six million dead Jews is only a very rough estimate and that the number may be as high as over eleven million (no shit, Sherlock).
- Remind them you couldn't tell Jews apart from most Aryan Germans with their pants up and their noses covered.
- Explain how the word "Aryan", when used in the correct context, is a term used to describe the Indo-Iranian and Indo-European language groups, not a race of people.
- Remind them that the 6 million Jews was less than a third of the total death count.
- Tell them Oswald Spengler was a communist.
- Tell them Oswald Spengler thought racists, antisemitic people, and misogynists were imbeciles:
- "How much envy of the capability of other people in view of one's lack of it lies hidden in antisemitism!"
- "When one would rather destroy business and scholarship than see Jews in them, one is an ideologue, a danger for the nation. Idiotic."
- Ask them to explain the sudden complete disappearance of traditional Eastern European Jewish culture after World War II.
- Ask them if they're Jewish. When they say no, respond with a sarcastic "Suuuuuure you're not!" Keep repeating until they assault you and/or admit their Jewish roots with a full Genographic Project test.
- Discuss the finer aspects of Heinrich Himmler's speech at Poznan. Bonus points if you mention that Himmler was a total Aspie who eschewed figurative language!
- Tell them that Goering was probably gay or a bisexual.
- Tell them that Joseph Goebbels looked like a fag and had a kikeface.
- Say Nietzsche was Polish, not German; even Nietzsche himself denied being German. In fact, he said that the only reason Germany was any good was because Germans had so much "Polish blood" in them.
- Tell them, that Nietzsche considered proto-Nazis, antisemites and similar racists the greatest dumbfucks eva.
- Inform them how America was inhabited by native red people and say that was genocide too. Bonus points if they don't realize that Hitler used that same argument against the Americans.
- Kindly remind them that Fred Leuchter has only a BA in history (not science), has no engineering license, doesn't understand Zyklon B, and has been proven wrong by experts with actual engineering degrees.
- Mention that Hitler is one of the most despised and hated figures of all time, and the fake propaganda they spread isn't going fool anybody to think otherwise.
- The Holocaust really happened and is one of the most widely documented events in history. So get over it, fuckwit.
- Tell them to to come up with something original. If they tell you they came up with everything themselves, tell them "no you didn't retard".
- Also tell them retards, cripples and handicapped were also killed in the T-4 Mental hospital eugenics program. Bonus points if they don't realize the connection with long term effects of inbreeding.
- Ask them about why Hitler choose to raze Germany and not assist wounded German citizens in the last days of WWII. Bonus points if they don't bring up the concept of "honor".
- Tell them how the film "Downfall" made you laugh and laugh....
- Ask them about Hitler's Jewish relatives and his failed efforts to cover them up.
- Tell them how they act just like their stereotypes of other races. ie: black person, black person, black person, black person, etc. From that point on start referring to them as a chalk/pale/white-washed nigger or something.
- Remind them that Rotmistrov outmaneuvered Nazi tank commanders at Kursk. Bonus points if you hint that Rotmistrov had Jewish blood.
- Tell them that Nazi tank commanders believed that running over Camel shit was a sign of luck. Then tell them the Allies made bombs camouflaged as Camel dung. (It worked)
- Remind them that the Jagdpanzer was the most retarded tank of all time.
- Call a KKK member a white nigger (if he's Irish or Italian). If they're Irish, remind them that they come from coward stock because Southern Ireland was too afraid to join WW2 and that they are the garbage of Northern Europe, way beneath the Darkest Skinned Sicilian. If they're Southern Italian, remind them of their Black blood that comes from the Moors invading and explains why their skin is darker and they have more afro like hair compared to lighter skinned, straight haired and sometimes blonde Northern Italians.
- Remind them that their women were rightfully raped by the Red Army, which treated all people, (including blacks, Jews, and Asians) except Nazi females, as equals.
- Post this rap
- tell them that they're a degenerate drain on the white race and that they use white supremacy as an excuse to ride the coattails of proper white people.
- tell them you're black.
- or Jewish!
- Say that the Nazis were too gay to shoot the Jews, and had to sneakily gas them instead.
- Say that 14/88 stands for 88 being a neo-Nazi's average IQ and fourteen being the average age that their mother had conceived them.
- Tell them you want them to be proud of their white skin, not in some moronic cult government kind of way but the way that any pretty-boy should when you're staring at his luscious pink nipples thinking about how pretty he'd look with two feet of long ginger hair while you're frotting him.
- Tell them how badly they got their pathetic useless asses kicked in the war especially by the USA.
- Mention how Oscar Schindler despite being a Nazi, saved Jews instead of killing them.
- Tell them their kind would have been killed in Aktion T4.
Videos
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Gallery
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Even the gay furries are Nazis.
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Nazis were big on teamwork
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Absolutely, totally, definitely NOT GAY
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Shoving snow down the ass of your fellow soldier, the official pastime of the Wehrmacht.
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"Oh, Jurgen! You are such ze joker, ja?"
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Captain SS
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Yay!
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BAWWWW
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JEW....
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German farmland, 1939
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Hitler's pokemon :3
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Japan loves Nazis
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Disney does as well.
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Goebbels ist Kawaii!!!!!
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Hitler sharing a joke with friends. Possibly about Jews.
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Cock goes where?
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Fanboy Goebbels says, "I LOVE YOU, Mein Führer!"
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What happens when Whites Chimpout
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The proof that Niggers stole Breakdance from the Germanz.
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Ubersecret SS unit
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Heinrich Himmler being a sexy bitch.
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Hermann Goering was one stylish motherfucker.
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You will never be as sexy as Reinhard Heydrich was, go kill yourself already. You know you never will. He was the fucking sexiest man EVAR.
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Heil Kitty!
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What nazis like to eat (aside from freshly tossed salad
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brb, endsieg
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Nazis pioneered Caturday.
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Yes, the teddy bear is white, but it's also Jewish.
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LOL WUT
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Light, love and Jews
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LOL England
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BUY IT
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Christians are well known Nazis.
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Hanging innocent nurses, a favorite Nazi pastime.
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/b/ tries to reanimate the Nazi Party.
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Native Americans were the first Nazis.
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Hello, sugah!
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LOL, this Reich.
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Nazi grandma or metaphor for putting Nazis in the oven?
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German car maker.
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Promoting racial diversity since 1939.
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Death to the lies!
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Democracies are for FAGGOTS.
See also
- 卐
- Adolf Hitler
- Apple
- Alt-right
- Billy The Heretic
- Conservatives
- Deadliest Warrior
- Democrats
- DevianTart Nazis
- Facism
- Fifty Hitler Post
- Godwin's Law
- Hal Turner
- He Jiankui
- Heath Campbell
- Hetalia
- Holocaust
- Holocaust denial
- Jesse Owens Black man credited with "single-handedly crushing Hitler's myth of Aryan supremacy".
- Jewish Question, The
- KKK
- Liberalism
- Metapedia.org
- Navi
- Republicans
- Roger Waters
- The Church of Creativity
- Viking
- White nationalism – The politically correct version of Nazism
- WWII
External links
A neonazi weeaboo's youtube page ← Not a troll (Not available in Israel).- Neo-Nazi Aspie
- White pride forum - troll daily.
- Stormfront - drama-filled even by Nazi standards That's fucking saying something.
- Scripture forbids mixing of races.
Iron March Forums(shut down)ThirdPosition Chatroom(gone)
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