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Blu-ray: Difference between revisions

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{{notice|[http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/16/toshiba-pulls-hd-dvd-support-blu-ray-wins/ BRACE FOR IMPACT!!1]}}
{{notice|[http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/16/toshiba-pulls-hd-dvd-support-blu-ray-wins/ BRACE FOR IMPACT!!1]}}
[[image:Morelazer.jpg|thumb|How a Blu-Ray disc is burned]]
[[image:Morelazer.jpg|thumb|How a Blu-Ray disc is burned]]
''Blu-ray'' was made by the closeted-Jews(Jew.ish) [[Sony|behind the UMD]], as a way of adapting to the market, just as the new [[Justin Bieber|Shota Robot Prostitute]], and to replace the Now-Easily obtainable DVD, with a Cooler(''[[Blue screen of death|Everything's cooler when it's blue!!]]''), more expansive [[DVD|shit of it's kind]]. [[cheap|Not to mention that ,it gets damaged more easily than normal DVDs]].  99% of the Blu Rays you receive from [http://www.blockbusteronline.com Blockbuster Online] will have damage somewhere where one minute out of the film will not play.
''Blu-ray'' ('''a.k.a Blu Gay''') was made by the closeted-Jews(Jew.ish) [[Sony|behind the UMD]], as a way of adapting to the market, just as the new [[Justin Bieber|Shota Robot Prostitute]], and to replace the Now-Easily obtainable DVD, with a [[BSOD|Cooler]], more expansive shit of it's kind. [[truth|Not to mention that ,it gets damaged more easily than normal DVDs]].  [[Only 2 percent|99%]] of the Blu Rays you receive from [http://www.blockbusteronline.com Blockbuster Online] will have damage somewhere where one minute out of the film will not play, usually during the minute of [[tits]] scenes you rented the movie for in the first place.


[[Blu]]-ray will likely be remembered as "Betamax 2: [[Teh]] Quest for [[Moar]] [[Lulz]]."  Sony is trying to force consumers to own a Blu-Ray player by integrating it into the [[Playstation 3]], bumping the price to [[IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAND!|$9999]]. Too bad Sony does not realize that 80[[%]] of us are not spoiled [[wiggers]] who own HDTVs; thus making Blu-Ray a [[Ricers|pointless waste of money]] to the casual consumer. Blu-Ray is being supported by major studios who needed a new way to rape consumers after they had already resold them the same dvd's multiple times just adding "super special edition" to the title. President of Warner Brothers Asscrack McDervish said "I love taking people's money. They are stupid sheep who will buy what we tell them". When not playing, Blu-Rays also make excellent coasters.
[[blue waffle|blu]]-ray will likely be remembered as "[[Electric Boogaloo|Betamax 2: Teh Quest for Moar Lulz]]."  Sony is trying to force consumers to own a Blu-Ray player by integrating it into the [[Playstation 3]], bumping the price to <s>[[over 9000|$9999]]</s> now only [[at least 100|$299]]. Too bad Sony does not realize that 80% of us are not spoiled wiggers who own HDTVs; thus making Blu-Ray a [[Ricers|pointless waste of money]] to the casual consumer. [[Blu Aardvark|Blu]]-Ray is being supported by [[4kids|major studios]] who needed a new way to [[rape|convince]] consumers after they had already resold them the same dvd's multiple times just adding "[[4chan Gold Account|super special edition]]" to the title. President of Warner Brothers [[Jew|Asscrack McDervish]] said "I love taking people's money. They are stupid sheep who will buy what we tell them". When not playing, Blu-Rays also make excellent [[lollercoaster|coasters]].






==[[Spics|Specs]]==
==[[Spics|Specs]]==
Blu-Ray's storage will be available from 25GB to about 200GB. Game developers have rejoiced, knowing that with the extra space (and the insane horsepower of the PS3) they no longer have to spend time to efficiently code games for file size or FPS. They also don't have to compress files anymore. Developers can be as sloppy as much as they want and get away with it, because [[13 year old boy]]s think bigger file size and minimum system specs = better games.
[[mudkip|Blu]]-Ray's storage will be available from 25[[gangbang|GB]] to about 200[[gangbang|GB]]. Game [[hacker|developers]] have rejoiced, knowing that with the extra space (and the insane [[steroids|horsepower]] of the PS3) they no longer have to spend time to efficiently code games for file size or [[fap|FPS]]. They also don't have to compress files anymore. Developers can be as sloppy as much as they want and get away with it, because [[13 year old boy]]s think bigger [[e-penis|file]] size and minimum system specs = [[shit|better]] games.
{{squote|Excited about Mandatory Managed Copy? Don't be. While it theoretically allows things such as making legal backups and streaming content from one part of your house to another, the studios have the option of charging you money to do that. Current HD players don't even support MMC. Your player also has to be connected to the internet. That's not inherently bad, but is certainly open for abuse. What if you don't have an available internet connection close to your home theater? What if you don't have broadband? The MPAA humbly requests that you cry them a river. It's hard to believe they even considered something like MMC, considering this. Choice quote: "Even if CDs do become damaged, replacements are readily available at affordable prices". Translation: please purchase another copy of content you have already paid for, thank you. There is a very interesting interview with an HD-DVD rep here about MMC.|[http://bluraysucks.com/ The truth]}}
{{squote|Excited about Mandatory Managed Copy? Don't be. While it theoretically allows things such as making legal backups and streaming content from one part of your house to another, the studios have the option of charging you money to do that. Current HD players don't even support MMC. Your player also has to be connected to the internet. That's not inherently bad, but is certainly open for abuse. What if you don't have an available internet connection close to your home theater? What if you don't have broadband? The MPAA humbly requests that you cry them a river. It's hard to believe they even considered something like MMC, considering this. Choice quote: "Even if CDs do become damaged, replacements are readily available at affordable prices". Translation: please purchase another copy of content you have already paid for, thank you. There is a very interesting interview with an HD-DVD rep here about MMC.|[http://bluraysucks.com/ The truth]}}


== Lazers ==
== [[shoop da woop|Lazers]] ==
Blu-Ray disks use blue lazers (shock!), where DVDs and other future [[old media]] use red lazers. Blue lazers are more expensive to make because blue lazers are clearly more awesome than red lazers. The blue lazer diodes are made of fairy dust instead of concentrated [[shit]]. This is why Blu-ray disks cost [[at least 100]] dollars each and why nobody can get the drives.
[[nigger|Blu]]-Ray disks use [[blue waffle|blue]] lazers, where DVDs and other [[old media]] use [[ginger|red]] lazers. [[COMBO BREAKER|Blue]] lazers are more expensive to make because [[redundant|blue]] lazers are clearly more [[gay|awesome]] than [[pokemon|red]] lazers. The [[Blu Aardvark|blue]] lazer [[dildo|diodes]] are made of [[drugs|fairy dust]] instead of concentrated [[shit]]. This is why [[blue waffle|Blu]]-ray disks cost [[at least 100]] dollars each and why nobody [[nobody cares|can get the drives]].


== How the Laser Diodes Are Made ==
== How the Laser [[dildo|Diodes]] Are Made ==
[[Image:Blu-ray_corn.jpg|thumb|Apparently this is how the disks are made.]]
[[Image:Blu-ray_corn.jpg|thumb|Apparently this is how the disks are made.]]
#Find [[fag|fairies]]
#Find [[fag|fairies]]
Line 28: Line 27:
== Country Codes ==
== Country Codes ==


Your favorite anti-piracy [[bullshit]], now with new region codes!
Your favorite anti-[[torrent|piracy]] [[bullshit]], now with new region codes!


{| border=1 cellpadding=5 cellspacing=0  
{| border=1 cellpadding=5 cellspacing=0  
|'''Code'''||'''Region'''
|'''Code'''||'''Region'''
|-  
|-  
|A/1 || [[USA]], [[Canadia]], [[Mexico]], [[Uruguay]], Paraguay, [[Korea]], [[Japan]]
|A/1 || [[USA]] &bull; [[Canadia]] &bull; [[Mexico]] &bull; [[Uruguay]] &bull; [[South America|Paraguay]] &bull; [[Korea]] &bull; [[Japan]]
|-  
|-  
|B/2 || [[Europe]], [[France]], [[Middle East]], [[Africa]], [[Australia]], [[New Zealand]]
|B/2 || [[Europe]] &bull; [[Middle East]] &bull; [[Africa]] &bull; [[Australia]] &bull; [[New Zealand]]
|-  
|-  
|C/3 || [[China]], [[India]], [[Russia]], [[Vietnam]], [[Tibet]]
|C/3 || [[China]] &bull; [[India]] &bull; [[Russia]] &bull; [[Vietnam]] &bull; [[Tibet]]
|-
|-
|BINGO || [[Bat Country]], [[Ghetto]], Bethesda
|BINGO || [[Bat Country]] &bull; [[Ghetto]] &bull; [[Fallout 3|Bethesda]]
|}
|}


<br/>This [[shit]] also has new "features" that allow [[Big Brother]] to send your player to [[Bantown]]. If [[you]]'re rich or [[retarded]] enough to actually buy a Blu-Ray player, you should probably [[hack]] that shit for maximum [[pirate|piracy]] and [[win]]. [[Fuck]] [[the man]]!
<br/>This [[shit]] also has new "features" that allow [[Big Brother]] to send your player to [[Bantown]]. If [[you]]'re rich or [[retarded]] enough to actually buy a Blu-Ray player, you should probably [[hack]] that shit for maximum [[ThePirateBay.se|piracy]] and [[win]]. [[Fuck]] [[the man]]!


== Companies that Have Jumped on the Blu-Ray Bandwagon ==
== Companies that Have Jumped on the Blu-Ray Bandwagon ==
*[[Sony]] (duh)
*[[Duh|Sony]]
*LG
*LG
*Panasonic
*Panasonic
Line 53: Line 52:
*[[Dell]]
*[[Dell]]
*[[Disney]]
*[[Disney]]
*[[Microsoft]]


== How YOU Can Help ==
== How YOU Can Help ==
*Don't buy a [[PS3]].
*Don't buy a [[PS3]].
*[[truth|Don't buy a Blu-ray player.]]
*[[truth|Don't buy a Blu-ray player.]]
*Don't be a [[wigger]].
*Don't be a [[nigger|wigger]].
*[[Troll]] and harrass aforementioned degenerates if sighted [[IRL]] or [[OTI]].
*[[Troll]] and harrass aforementioned degenerates if sighted [[IRL]] or [[OTI]].
* [[09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0]] - you came here for cheat codes, yes?
* [[09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0]] - use this cheat code.


<br/>If you still feel the need to purchase a Blu-Ray player, simply follow these steps:
<br/>If you still feel the need to purchase a Blu-Ray player, simply follow these steps:
Line 65: Line 65:
#Once purchased, Insert your penis in the tray and piss inside it.
#Once purchased, Insert your penis in the tray and piss inside it.
#Calmly explain to the store that someone pissed in it, but do '''NOT''' ask for your money back. Stores will 99% of the time not question shit as long as you are not asking for money back. Exchange it for store credit instead.
#Calmly explain to the store that someone pissed in it, but do '''NOT''' ask for your money back. Stores will 99% of the time not question shit as long as you are not asking for money back. Exchange it for store credit instead.
#Spend said store credit on a [[fail|360]] and a [[shit nobody cares about|bunch of movies]].
#Spend said store credit on a [[xbox|360]] and a [[shit nobody cares about|bunch of movies]].
#Write a [[livejournal|long blog entry]] about how you got a [[shit|360]], a shit load of DVDs and [[crap|games]], and then had enough money to get your [[lulz|red-rings]] repaired. [[win|All of that for the price of one blue ray player]].
#Write a [[livejournal|long blog entry]] about how you got a [[RROD|360]], a shit load of [[avatar|DVDs]] and [[dating sim|games]], and then had enough money to get your [[lulz|red-rings]] repaired. [[win|All of that for the price of one Blu-ray player]].


==External Links==
==External Links==
*[http://www.blu-ray.com/ Faggotry central]
*[http://www.blu-ray.com/ Faggotry central]
*[http://www.gamespot.com/news/6142519.html Fanboys cream themselves over Blu-Ray]
*[http://www.gamespot.com/news/6142519.html Fanboys cream themselves over Blu-Ray]
{{digital media}}
{{Digital Media}}
{{softwarez}}
[[category:Softwarez]]
[[category:Softwarez]]
[[category:Communicae]]
[[category:Communicae]]

Latest revision as of 09:33, 1 February 2023

BRACE FOR IMPACT!!1
How a Blu-Ray disc is burned

Blu-ray (a.k.a Blu Gay) was made by the closeted-Jews(Jew.ish) behind the UMD, as a way of adapting to the market, just as the new Shota Robot Prostitute, and to replace the Now-Easily obtainable DVD, with a Cooler, more expansive shit of it's kind. Not to mention that ,it gets damaged more easily than normal DVDs. 99% of the Blu Rays you receive from Blockbuster Online will have damage somewhere where one minute out of the film will not play, usually during the minute of tits scenes you rented the movie for in the first place.

blu-ray will likely be remembered as "Betamax 2: Teh Quest for Moar Lulz." Sony is trying to force consumers to own a Blu-Ray player by integrating it into the Playstation 3, bumping the price to $9999 now only $299. Too bad Sony does not realize that 80% of us are not spoiled wiggers who own HDTVs; thus making Blu-Ray a pointless waste of money to the casual consumer. Blu-Ray is being supported by major studios who needed a new way to convince consumers after they had already resold them the same dvd's multiple times just adding "super special edition" to the title. President of Warner Brothers Asscrack McDervish said "I love taking people's money. They are stupid sheep who will buy what we tell them". When not playing, Blu-Rays also make excellent coasters.


Specs

Blu-Ray's storage will be available from 25GB to about 200GB. Game developers have rejoiced, knowing that with the extra space (and the insane horsepower of the PS3) they no longer have to spend time to efficiently code games for file size or FPS. They also don't have to compress files anymore. Developers can be as sloppy as much as they want and get away with it, because 13 year old boys think bigger file size and minimum system specs = better games.

 
“ 		 
Excited about Mandatory Managed Copy? Don't be. While it theoretically allows things such as making legal backups and streaming content from one part of your house to another, the studios have the option of charging you money to do that. Current HD players don't even support MMC. Your player also has to be connected to the internet. That's not inherently bad, but is certainly open for abuse. What if you don't have an available internet connection close to your home theater? What if you don't have broadband? The MPAA humbly requests that you cry them a river. It's hard to believe they even considered something like MMC, considering this. Choice quote: "Even if CDs do become damaged, replacements are readily available at affordable prices". Translation: please purchase another copy of content you have already paid for, thank you. There is a very interesting interview with an HD-DVD rep here about MMC.
  		„
 

—The truth

Lazers

Blu-Ray disks use blue lazers, where DVDs and other old media use red lazers. Blue lazers are more expensive to make because blue lazers are clearly more awesome than red lazers. The blue lazer diodes are made of fairy dust instead of concentrated shit. This is why Blu-ray disks cost at least 100 dollars each and why nobody can get the drives.

How the Laser Diodes Are Made

Apparently this is how the disks are made.
  1. Find fairies
  2. ?????????
  3. Make diodes
  4. ?????????
  5. PROFIT!!!11

Java Software Support

The whores over at Sun decided it would be a damn fine idea to put Java into all Blu-Ray players. So now Alan Turing can pwn both your browser and your TV! This basically just adds moar fail to the drives, which increases their Jew factor.

Country Codes

Your favorite anti-piracy bullshit, now with new region codes!

Code Region
A/1 USA • Canadia • Mexico • Uruguay • Paraguay • Korea • Japan
B/2 Europe • Middle East • Africa • Australia • New Zealand
C/3 China • India • Russia • Vietnam • Tibet
BINGO Bat Country • Ghetto • Bethesda


This shit also has new "features" that allow Big Brother to send your player to Bantown. If you're rich or retarded enough to actually buy a Blu-Ray player, you should probably hack that shit for maximum piracy and win. Fuck the man!

Companies that Have Jumped on the Blu-Ray Bandwagon

How YOU Can Help


If you still feel the need to purchase a Blu-Ray player, simply follow these steps:

  1. Enter a store and find a Blu-Ray Player or PS3 for purchase.
  2. Once purchased, Insert your penis in the tray and piss inside it.
  3. Calmly explain to the store that someone pissed in it, but do NOT ask for your money back. Stores will 99% of the time not question shit as long as you are not asking for money back. Exchange it for store credit instead.
  4. Spend said store credit on a 360 and a bunch of movies.
  5. Write a long blog entry about how you got a 360, a shit load of DVDs and games, and then had enough money to get your red-rings repaired. All of that for the price of one Blu-ray player.

External Links

Blu-ray

is part of a series on
Digital Media

Adobe® Photoshop® • Android • BlackBerry • Blu-ray • Compact Disc • DesuRadio • DRM • Fairphone • FLAC • Fraps • Gimp • Internet DVD • K-LULZ • Irfanview • iPhone • iPod • iTunes • L0de • Microsoft Surface • Mixtapes • MKV • MP3 • MS Paint • Pivot Stickfigure Animator • Quicktime • RealPlayer • Reason • Sony Vegas • VLC Media Player • Windows Movie Maker • Windows Media Player • WMV • Zune

Blu-ray is part of a series on

Softwarez

Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage.

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