Gay hanky code

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A colorblind gay guy must have some confusing nights.
 

 
 

—Anonymous

Why bother with piercings when there are so many holes available?

Ever wondered why a rainbow is the gay symbol? Is it because it shows that God still loves them? Is it a reflection of their colorful characters? Or is it because the rainbow is the universal signal of hope?

No. In actuality the rainbow is a reflection of the wide variety of colours used to prove just how perverted these cum-sucking, shit-licking ass-rammers really are. Enter the gay hanky code.


A Magical Guide to Hankies

Use scrollbar to see the full image

An extensive and oddly specific guide made by wikipedos.

The Left-Right Distinction

If the hanky is worn on the left, the wearer wants to give it. In other words, he is a brutal, sadistic rapist who will merrily tear your ass open while you scream and cry for mercy. (See Sick Fuck.)

If the hanky is worn on the right, the wearer wants to take it. In other words, he is a masochistic pussy who gets his rocks off by being ravished violently and subsequently developing a victim complex. (See Attention Whore or Wimmins.)

Non-Colors

Not all of the code relies on handkerchiefs.

Most boys who go home with a guy carrying a Kewpie doll on the right left end up looking like this.

Race

Still stupid enough to believe that blacks have huge cocks? Well, for all the racist faggots out there, there is a guide that will help you choose which color you would like to assfuck/get assfucked by tonight:

Rape

 
 
He was asking for it, Your Honor! He was wearing a blue handkerchief!
 

 

Bubba

A little-known fact about hankies is that they can make rape perfectly legal.

Since there are so many legitimate reasons to rape, the blue hanky is rarely needed. However, if the little queeny twat is being difficult, make sure to fuck him senseless and plant a blue hanky on him afterwards.

"Do not fuck"

Silver is the color of hanky worn by celebrities and rock-stars. Except, if they were a celebrity or rock star you cared about (or even if you didn't care about them) would they really need a hanky to point this out? Any wannabe star flaunting a silver hanky deserves people to point at them and laugh behind their back.

A Hoax?

There has been much debate around whether the so-called "Hanky Code" was in fact, real.

Who cares?

It's not as though whether something is true or not has ever stopped an Encyclopedia Dramatica article before.

Christian Hanky Code

Sometimes doing it wrong is the same as doing it right. Even if it is George Bush.

Is this a joke? Do we dare to think this might actually be true? If it isn't, it might as well be, as most Christians are in-the-closet cockmonglers anyway.

Video

Other Gay Symbols

Now that the essential distinction between masculine, dominant heterosexual man and feminine, submissive heterosexual woman has begun to fade thanks to Leftard Womens' Studies majors, we need a whole new set of symbols to properly describe a person's gender, sex and sexual preferences:

The Rainbow

Now that you know the true origins of the Gay Rainbow, let's clear up a few lingering myths:

WHITE = cum.

The Myth:

  1. RED = Life
  2. ORANGE = Healing
  3. YELLOW = Sun
  4. GREEN = Nature
  5. BLUE = Art
  6. INDIGO = Harmony
  7. VIOLET = Spirit


The Truth:

  1. RED = Fister/Fistee
  2. ORANGE = Filthy slut (anything goes)
  3. YELLOW = Pisser/Pissee
  4. GREEN = Prostitute/John
  5. BLUE = Wants/Gives blowjobs
  6. INDIGO = Gives/Takes it in the ass
  7. VIOLET = Piercer/Piercee

Pink Triangle

The pink triangle is a hilariously ironic symbol of the gay movement. According to Aaron (who is apparently qualified to provide "Gay Info"), "the pink triangle, or Rosawinkel in German, was sewn onto the clothes of homosexuals sent to concentration camps" -- then later became a symbol of gay solidarity. Seriously. To add insult to injury, homosexuals in German concentration camps were notorious child molesters and pedo pimps who were rightfully put back into prison by Allied and Soviet powers when the camps were liberated.

Unlike the cocks of most gay men, this one is in the middle of a big black box. No sharp Edges, Even moar gay.

Victory Over AIDS

Moar than a touch of irony.

This symbol is a prime example of FAIL for one important reason:

Gays have not triumphed over AIDS.

It only wins in that black is pushed to the bottom -- just like it should be.

See Also

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