Dogecoin

Dogecoin (also known as Dodgycoin) is an open source peer-to-peer cryptocurrency, whatever the hell that means. It was introduced to the Internet on December 6th, 2013 and became favored by Shiba Inus worldwide because dogs care about human space bux.

Origins

For those who actually have a job and don't spend all day on the Internet, Dogecoin is named after Know Your Meme's "Best Memes of 2013: Editorial Choices," Doge. The cryptocurrency is programmed by a former IBM engineer who never heard about memes, but when someone suggested Dogecoin, he went with it. While he had an interest in virtual currencies, he distanced himself from Bitcoin due to it's association with Silk Road and other controversies, failing to realize Doge was popularized by a bunch of drug addicts.

Dogecoin's true purpose is to get people to spam the Doge meme everywhere so it becomes 2014's Mosted Hated and Unfunny Meme of the Year. A glimpse at news headlines and postings by currency holders confirms that Dodgycoin off to a good start. Those who can't afford to purchase a coin for $0.0006 but aspire to become a dogillionaire can still pack their Dogewallet with Dogecoins by visiting an online ~~faucet~~water bowl.

Is it unfunny yet?

Lemmings

"Make dogillions today!"

Due to the nature of virtual currencies, governments are unable to control them, so if someone's Dodgycoins get stolen, nobody will care. For all intents and purposes, Dogecoins have the same value as vaporware. However, since it was named after a popular meme, clueless people opened up their wallets, eager to invest in the cryptocurrency.

In fact, many at the time thought that Dogecoin was nothing more than an Internet prank. Not even a week earlier, it's value had decreased by 80% due to exploits in mining the coins. News of someone from Australia known as Trade Fortress who claimed he lost $1 million in Bitcoins when online wallet inputs.io shut down without warning, claiming they were hacked. Bitcoin itself was busy laughing at journalist who heralded Dogecoin as a potential successor. With a website less than a month old and a bunch of clueless ~~users~~investors, what could possibly go wrong?

Hacked

In an epic move that made the Grinch himself smile, this question was answered on Christmas. Someone managed to find a security hole in Dogewallet, where users can store their Dogecoins. Around 30 million coins were stolen, worth about $12,000. This earned the hacker the honor of being the only hacker to steal less than what a part-timer makes flipping burgers in a year. In response, Dogecoin did the rational thing and shut down its website and social media accounts, a move that wasn't suspicious at all. Eventually the site was reopened, then new Facebook and Reddit accounts were created, but the damage was already done. With news of the hacking, those who purchased the currency "for the lulz" were suddenly thinking of it as serious business. Bitcoin was busy laughing at the newbs who didn't understand why online wallets are a bad idea. Dogecoin itself made matters worse by recommending people store their coins offline, admitting it didn't have a clue about how to secure their own site.

Drama escalated as clueless "investors" began posting their email, username and other account information to Dogecoin's Reddit for all to see, panicking over what was supposed to be a joke. Others began speculating this was an inside job which resulted in some lawsuit threats over what amounted to a couple dollars. The hacker successfully got journalist to plaster the Doge meme all over the headlines (Forbes was the only news site to resist) and to get people to actually take fake money, er, Dogecoins, seriously.

	“	How will you do that? I lost over 160k doge, I emailed you the day before I got hacked, my username was sohaibk and email that I used to message you was [email protected]. Send my Doges home: D5r7TXcU3JqqtBXAZXKJtNL7LAFUfFYeDm	„
	—sohaibk, THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION!

YouTube

Below are some YouTube videos, some of them show how to mine Dogecoins. Go ahead and get in on the cryptocurrency action, we'll laugh at your ignorant ass when they vanish into cyberspace.

Doesn't cover Dogecoin's epic blunder

How to Mine Dogecoins #1

How to Mine Dogecoins #2

Previous Video | Next Video

Quotes

	“	Hello Dogewallet, I mined 2400 dogecoins and I am collecting them as if they were real money. I would like you to refund these to my new safe offline wallet: DLpxkpRGhH2G6Mf7juzcoetZV5NiFWn1sf My username was: dennis1853 And my address was: D9vHp1TbGsAk7kresPBtmQaNYWRDaFxH5n I'm very sad about this happening and I hope you will refund me in this way. I know you might not care about your small customers but if you do then refund me these Doges!	„
	—dennis1853, sad about $1.36 in Dogecoins... GTFO

	“	I'll give you chance to resolve this, but be aware that I'm beyond pissed since I lost 667k today; not a happy xmas.	„
	—mondain, $400 in Dogecoins... dumbass

	“	PLEASE SEND ME MY COINS IVE MESSAGED FOR DAYS OVER 10 MESSAGES	„
	—Viper15973

	“	I'll give you chance to resolve this, but be aware that I'm beyond pissed since I lost 667k today; not a happy xmas.	„
	—mondain

	“	I agree, I keep failing to understand why people would keep wallets online. I think there is appeal of "the cloud" for documents, games, lots of files and such. However with how early cryptocurrency is, I wouldn't trust anyone to keep my wallet safe and secure online.	„
	—snackies