Gadgetology

This is a sin in Gadgetology.

Gadgetology (also referred to as Gaykoslavie in vodkaspeak) is a Russian-based apocalyptic cult religion that worships that fucking mouse from the Rescue Rangers. That mouse we speak of is of course Gadget Hackwrench -grace be upon her- whose popularity in Russia is owed to the fact that her show was the first serial cartoon to be aired on a regular weekly basis after the dismantlement of the USSR; the first of its kind seen in their country. Like all shows that were mildly popular in their home country, an even more devout and crazed fanbase pops up in a foreign country. The Russians' love for the Rescue Rangers is so strong that a small band of them even formed a cult based off the principals preached by the show; something not too dissimilar from the love weeaboos have for their anime. Gadget is often idealized as the perfect woman for being cute, quirky, optimistic and technologically adept; so naturally these Ruskies venerated her as their goddess.

Gadgetologists meet up once a year on March 15th, Gadget's (supposed) birthday, to venerate the goddess by offering her gifts, marching around with tiki torches and partying hard. They believe they can become spiritually connected to her both by prayer and by drawing appreciable fan art for her.

Gadgetology falls into three denominational currents:

• Traditional: Traditional Gadgetology is the base principles of Gadgetology and consists of prayer and glorifying the name of Gadget through committing righteous acts and spreading her word.
• Progressive: Progressive Gadgetology is more focused on real-world action and living a lifestyle close to that as portrayed by the Rescuers.
• Apocalyptic: Apocalyptic Gadgetology is concerned with the end-times and reflects the doomsday aspects of the cult. It is prophesized that Gadget will enter our world via some sort of dimensional merge to free humanity from the clutches of Puziel and guide the believers to Gadgetise.

Their holy book is the Sacred Nut Writings and like pretty much all wannabe religions, it is essentially a rehashed Christianity. So far, only 24 parables of this text have been published and/or completed; meaning that since the decade or so that they've had to write up on it, its member have either abandoned this cult or are gatekeeping.

A Cult Classic

Gadgetologists want to follow the teachings of their goddess, Gadget Hackwrench, yet ironically there is a Rescue Rangers episode about the dangers of joining a cult in which Gadget rescues her friends from a consumersic cult, thus putting their belief system into a state of paradox.

Ruination of the Radiant Gadget

After leaving the Rescue Rangers IP unmolested for like two decades, Disney decided, in the year of 2022, to release their most treacherous film yet. Gadget, the accursed whore, was prophesized to marry Chip or maybe even Dale, yet wound up being a baby making machine for Zippy with 47 mouse-fly hybrid babies. How treacherous to pair the goddess of purity below with the Lord of the Flies! Immense butthurt ensued and many lost their faith while others decried this efface as noncanonical.

	“	He FUCKED her. He infected her womb with his shit orbiting, hand-rubbing insect seed- And you know what? SHE LOVED IT. SHE BEGGED FOR MORE. HE LITERALLY MADE HER A BREEDING FACTORY. THIS IS THE FACE OF THE MAN WHO HAS WON IT ALL.	„
	—Anonymous

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2010 Gadgetology Meet-Up About missing Pics

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See Also

• Rangerphile - Just realized I haven't used this word yet. Anyways, meet the American fanbase.
• Ray Jones - loves Gadget to an almost cult-like degree.
• Scientology - English namesake of "Gadgetology".

External Links

• Konorama.ru (official website)
• English-Russia article that brought them to prominence

[Close them downOpen the records]

Gadgetology is part of a series on Cults