User:Shwiffer

The Yaoi Hater, semi-final form.

When Yaoi and/or Futanari has rose to its prime point of power, one man will set them on fire and send them back to the lands from whence they came... You would have better luck with a stick.

Wait, what?

Shwiffer is a wapanese in denial, pokefag, otaku, bitch who attempts to be with the "in" crowd but fails horribly. Oh, and he hates Yaoi, Futanari, fags, and any sex involving two guys or dickgirls getting it on. He enjoys furries (but denies it), lolicon (but denies it), and openly admits to jacking off and making references to his boner. He also takes pride in announcing these things in public. As well as not giving a fuck what people say when he does said actions.

Shwiffer also is known to go under many other names. But has whined like a little bitch not to post them. Oh, and he's also a Nintendofag.

The Pokefag World RP

Shwiffer had played Gaia for maybe 3 years, and after lulzily leaving a guild he formed his own to support a single RP. The Pokemon World RP he called it, December 1st of 2010. Surprisingly, this guild made it to 200 members, despite having OVER 70 RULES WHERE AT LEAST 40 HAVE BULLETS UNDERNEATH. Alas, the only active people are the mods and admins.

Last Thursday, Shwiffer gave up ownership to his Vice Captain because he wanted her delicious nerdy poontang. Alas, he never got any.

Recently, he has reclaimed ownership after displaying more activity than the "VC".

Mabinogi Drama

Shwiffer, having feeling butthurt over losing an e-grilfriend, joined Mabinogi 2 years ago (as of 2011) in hopes to find some e-friends and some pussy to screw. After being a total drama-fag on one server, he moved to another and did the exact same shit. Attempting to troll, he quit the guild he had so loved and decided to stand on a mountain for three weeks and come down if someone defeated him in battle or on September 13th if no one came.

No one has bothered to show up. Shwiffer has quit Mabinogi.

It was later revealed that he was attempting to make a anti-hack program.

He made a guild. This was his last action.

Back to Gaia? WHAT?!

During the later days of the Mabinogi Drama, he moved back to Gaia for one reason. "An attempt to become a troll." His trolling efforts were jointed however, pairing with his best friend on an account called CutieLuv32, a dickgirl who rapes everyone and calls them all racial terms. Though due to the two people having different trolling styles, the setup goes to shit.

Shwiffer's Style: Get a rise out of someone and enjoy the lulz as they rage. Extra points if he can make them contradict themselves. Add raep when necessary. Only add the trollface when complete.

Friend's Style: Raep, insult, and use a quote from The Breakfast Club. Over, and over, and over.

	“	Stupid,Worthless,No good, Free loadin, son of a bitch! Retarded, Loudmouthed, Jerk! "You forgot ugly and lazy and disrespectful!" Shut up bitch! Go fix me some chicken potpie! "What about you noob?" Fuck you! "No noob, what about-" Fuck you!! "NO!! NOOB!!! WHAT ABOUT YOU!!!!" FUCK YOU!!!! *Punches*	„
	— CutieLuv32 attempting to troll but failing miserably.

Other Efforts

The Yaoi Hater, final form. Also troll form.

He not only trolls on Gaia, he loves to troll on Skype as well, or anywhere in fact. As well as anyone, even himself. His trolling around the other locations on the internet takes use of Smugleaf and rapes it with gold, seriously. He admits he made it in under 5 minutes. But his peers have noted he does a beautiful job utilizing Smugleaf.

His first ever Skype troll involved use of his ex-internet girlfriend. He notes that he enjoyed it and did little to no effort.

[9/4/2011 10:01:58 PM] Forever Imagine: Shwiff i can't do this right now.

[9/4/2011 10:02:10 PM] Shwiffer: Okay

[9/4/2011 10:02:45 PM] Forever Imagine: I have too much on my plate right now. And in a few days my brother is gonna be home so it is gonna be worse.

[9/4/2011 10:04:06 PM] Shwiffer: Hold on, killing n00bs.

[9/4/2011 10:05:22 PM] Shwiffer: Okay

[9/4/2011 10:06:03 PM] Shwiffer: I don't handle any complaints or details until they go through my secretary

[9/4/2011 10:06:24 PM] Forever Imagine: Complaints?

[9/4/2011 10:06:31 PM] Shwiffer: Or Details

[9/4/2011 10:06:35 PM] Shwiffer: In your case, details

[9/4/2011 10:06:57 PM] Forever Imagine: Details how? I don't wanna go into details ok? its too complicated.

[9/4/2011 10:07:11 PM] Shwiffer: You can contact my secretary via skype.

[9/4/2011 10:07:24 PM] Shwiffer: You already attempted to tell me why your plate is full.

[9/4/2011 10:07:43 PM] Shwiffer: His name is *gives name of fellow troll*

[9/4/2011 10:08:11 PM] Forever Imagine: Don't do this shwiff. :l

[9/4/2011 10:08:26 PM] Shwiffer: But it's true.

[9/4/2011 10:08:46 PM] Shwiffer: It's because under regular circumstances I can't hear people over the sound of my awesome.

[9/4/2011 10:08:54 PM] Forever Imagine: What's true? that you are being a jackass because i won't go out with you again?

[9/4/2011 10:09:02 PM] Shwiffer: Under private circumstances it's different.

[9/4/2011 10:09:19 PM] Shwiffer: Who said I was being a jackass?

[9/4/2011 10:09:32 PM] Forever Imagine: You are acting like one.

[9/4/2011 10:09:59 PM] Shwiffer: Challenge accepted, you mad?

[9/4/2011 10:10:53 PM] Forever Imagine: No i'm more then mad i'm pissed. I've been nothing but pissed. i was fine tonight until all this.

[9/4/2011 10:11:34 PM] Shwiffer: I'm a Pokemon with a popped collar, your arguement is invalid.

[9/4/2011 10:12:03 PM] Shwiffer: You're the only one who hasn't read my policy.

[9/4/2011 10:12:14 PM] Forever Imagine: Policy? what are you 5?

[9/4/2011 10:12:20 PM] Shwiffer: State an answer, send details to my secretary.

[9/4/2011 10:12:38 PM] Shwiffer: No, you're missing a digit.

[9/4/2011 10:12:50 PM] Forever Imagine: Wow...... Shwiffer know what. i get that maybe you are pissed off because i won't go out with you. But i don't love you anymore ok?

[9/4/2011 10:13:27 PM] Shwiffer: Me Pissed?

[9/4/2011 10:13:45 PM] Shwiffer: I never said such.

[9/4/2011 10:13:50 PM] Forever Imagine: you are acting like it.

[9/4/2011 10:14:26 PM] Shwiffer: This pleases Smugleaf.

[9/4/2011 10:16:22 PM] Shwiffer: *Shows the many emotions of Smugleaf.*

[9/4/2011 10:30:33 PM] Forever Imagine: i don't give a shit about the stupid Pokemon shwiff.

[9/4/2011 10:32:16 PM] Shwiffer: *Bitch Please Smugleaf Version

[9/4/2011 10:33:28 PM] Forever Imagine: Know what Shwiffer if you are gonna act like a little child over this. Then don't bother talking to me. I don't need more bullshit right now. i'm already close to the edge.

[9/4/2011 10:33:48 PM] Shwiffer: You decided to reply just now.

[9/4/2011 10:34:46 PM] Forever Imagine: What the hell does that even mean?

[9/4/2011 10:35:21 PM] Shwiffer: You must still want to hear my trollin' if you're replying.

[9/4/2011 10:35:35 PM] Forever Imagine: Well whatever. Bye then

[9/4/2011 10:36:00 PM] Shwiffer:

His newest attempt was accidental. Recently, he was cleaning his house of stuff with his girlfriend. Apparently he HAS a girlfriend and won't be forever alone... Or it's a possibility.

He was sending it to the people who collect old junk he has, and his friend posted a status on facebook. He thought he'd share that half his stuff got a little busted and his girlfriend won't even help him fix it. He used suggestive wording which broke out into a MASSIVE SHITSTORM over the course of a few hours, people started raging on him like aspies to hentai.

Gullible facebook people think he meant his boner, clearly, and he simply asked if he could check his give a fuck meter on if he cares that her father were to see that his girlfriend wouldn't help him fix stuff. Moar rage took place and he asked why he couldn't post such a comment on her status, let alone make references to his boner anymore (due to an incident involving similar mass confusion). Even moar rage ensued this where some dumb bitch kept feeding the fire. Shwiffer found it quite amusing that so many people are gullible? EVEN MOAR RAGE ENSUED and he soon asked what his "shlong" has to do with it all. After some MOAR RAGE comments and a comment about his facebook being removed due to him cleaning his house, he realized what the hell was going on. He made an attempt to clear it up... And said friend from earlier deleted him.

He laughed it off and hasn't commented any more.

TL;DR: Makes a truly innocent but suggestive sounding comment on facebook, shitstorm ensues.