Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Austerity

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigationJump to search

So, you just got fired from your job while your boss got another pay raise. Or it's three weeks until your retirement benefits kick in and your boss is letting you go. Or you've worked at a company for more than 10 years and notice all your co-workers are younger than you are, are getting paid less than you are, and speak less English than you do.

A short cartoon about how Americans use austerity, because we all know taxing the rich will solve everything and get lazy people to work harder.

Welcome to the exciting world of austerity.

Austerity doesn't necessarily have to apply to the corporate environment. In fact, governments around the world are using it all the time to cover their asses by throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

The whole purpose of austerity isn't so much to cut back on government or corporate spending but to create a wide buffer between the haves and the have-nots.

Austerity Viewpoints

Generally, the opinion of austerity depends on whose making the cuts to the government or corporation.

Who's OK with Austerity?

 
Together, they always mean bad news

Who's not OK with Austerity?

  • You
  • Liberals
  • The military (I'm sure we still have the pics from when the Military had those "will fight for food" pictures.)
  • Local governments
  • Laborers
  • Those worried about being fired.

Who's completely fucked by Austerity?

  • You
  • Anyone on social security
  • Anyone on welfare.
  • Anyone who really relies on government help to keep them from moving into a Hooverville camp.
  • The poor.

General Response to Austerity

File:Wonka merchant austerity.png

The Europeans seems to have the right mindset when it comes to dealing with austerity measures. Unfortunately, Americans seems to be sedate to do anything about it. Perhaps its because it will cost way too much to join in the looting and the setting of things on fire because they live 20 miles away in the suburbs and gas is $4/gallon. Perhaps all the cohersed surveilance keeps them from active protest against the self serving system? Or maybe they are just lazy and would rather stay home and watch television or be part of the 82nd Chairbourne that goes onto the Internet to bitch how much they dislike the government repressing them over something they saw on Fox News.

Whatever the reason, Americans need to get angry over more than just a couple of cops beating up a black disabled man on the train. They'd rather see anarchy as a mass produced product rather than as a means to equalize fascism or government regulation.

It doesn't help that liberals are so limp-wristed about doing anything while the well-funded corporate conservatives continue to distort the facts.

Americans need to get FIRED UP! The need a strong, universal reason to incite chaos and drama in order to stop austerity from further rewarding the rich with what the middle class worked hard for

How to stop austerity

  • Organize a riot. (If a bunch of faggots can organize a Flash mob, then they can sure as hell do this.)
  • Stop electing corporate bureaucrats. This includes, Jews, Jesus Freaks, helicopter moms, and celebrities.
    • If possible, remove them from office. (Impeachment is for pussies! Demand their resignation!)
  • Stop vandalizing public property and start destroying private property. (Why do assholes tear up payphones and school deskes? That's just stupid. DESTROY THE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS! Also, avoid damage to parks, libraries, churches, and museums, unless pro-austerity people are hiding in them. State property can be vandalized, but it depends on the situation. No point of burning down the unemployment office if you need your welfare check next week.)
  • Hack major corporatations. Anon delivers!
  • Sabatoge surveilance systems. (99% of all problems with riots can easily be avoided by hindering the methods used to spy on people useless. Take out cameras, hack spybots, fuck with the police.)
  • Turn your cellphone off. (Part of that last point. Find other ways to communicate that are low-tech and seldomly monitored. Your cellphone will rat you out.)
  • Demand corporations pay taxes! (If a corporation is a "person", then they can damn well pay their taxes like a human being!)
    • Demand the rich to pay their fair share! Part of the reason they like to call themselves "small businesses" is that their is a little loop hole in the law where you can claim yourself a Limited-Liability Corporation (LLC) in the state of New Mexico. From their, you can then use your new "small business status" as a way to apply to become a non-profit organization. Some folks will go the extra step and apply their status to become a Delaware Corporation in the state of Delaware or they can send the money they say that they don't make to the Dutch Antillies where they have an offshore bank account. But the Internal Revenue Service, and several small Carribean nations are catching onto this faggotry. To break up this racket, information will need to be leaked. Find it and post that on Wikileaks or Pastebin. Share it with Anonymous.

There are likely other methods to resolve austerity when all peaceful methods have failed. Be creative, list them here if you'd like. JUST GET ANGRY!

[RecessionInflation]
£€ Austerity is a part of a series on Money
  Companies

AdFlyAdobeAmazonAppleAT&TBDICBellBitcoinBurger KingCelestial ToystoreComcastCostcoDisneyDuckDuckGoeBayEthereumFox NewsGNWTGoogleHappy Madison ProductionsIBMIKEAMicrosoftMcDonald'sMTVNew Media RockstarsNintendoNovellOracle CorporationPatreonPayPalSonySun MicrosystemsT-MobileVerizonViacomWal-MartWikiaYahooYouTube

People

Bernie MadoffBill GatesChad HurleyGregory KohsHal TurnerJewsJimbo WalesKlaus SchwabL. Ron JeremyLarry SangerLyor CohenMario LaudicinaMartin ShkreliSteve ChenSteve Jobs

Ideology / Politics

AusterityBailout PlanCapitalismCommunismGlobalisationGovernmentGun controlHealth Care RageIceslaveJudaismKarl MarxObamacareRon PaulAyn RandRandroidSocialistRonald ReaganWelfareZeitgeist MovementZeitgeist - The Movie

Selling

AdvertisingBitcoinBriberyExtreme AdvertisingBilly MaysPorn AdvertisementsShamwowSpamSubservient ChickenWinnebago ManGeorge Zimmer

Topics

419 Nigerian Email ScamsThe Dot.Com BubbleEconomistEconomyForeign GirlfriendInternet moneyJew GoldMoneyNFTsPoorProfitRape dollarsScientologyToilet Paper HoardingUnlimited disposable income