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Hero
The word "hero" can apply to one of four main hero-classes.
The Ancient Hero
Traditionally, heroes were the kind of men that could raze an entire village to the ground, slaughter the children, and be home with enough time to rape the women and eat dinner. Vikings are a prime example of the legendary heroes we laymen once worshiped as minor deities. It is thanks to the viking invasion of Scotland that there is still a large enough human-to-sheep-blood ratio to allow successful breeding of humans. If ever one finds themselves in the shadow of an ancient hero, they should be forewarned that they could get stepped on, or at the very least, almost raped.
The Modern Hero
The modern hero, is any person who manages to capture the attention of stupid teenage girls. An example of a proclamation of heroism:
- PrincessBrittany1122: liek, omgwtfbbq, that singer is liek, totaly HAWT, hes liek, totaly mi HERO!!!11
- SekcStephie6969: omigod i no he is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mien 2!
The Real Hero
Everybody knows that real heroes, like Superman, wear leotards. Firemen are not real heroes, contrary to popular belief; they are actually part of the Illuminati Jewish conspiracy.
An hero
He was such an hero
to take it all away.
We miss him so, this you should know,
and we honor him this day.
He was an hero to take that shot
to leave us all behind.
God, do we wish we could take it back
And now he's on our minds.
Brother, nephew, son and friend
He was all these things and more.
Yes, we'll always remember seeing him
with his brains upon the floor.
