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Bitcoin
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Add pixplzkthnx to Bitcoin Plz to be adding some pix now kthnx. Consult the image selection process for help, or just google up some pix.Plz remove this notice once there are plenty of pix. |
Bitcoin (pronounced Bite-me) is the national currency of esperantists and l33t hax0rs everywhere. The inventor, a well known cryptographer in the Bitcoin community, is such a recluse leading to several speculative theories about his identity:
- Collective of several people.
- Self-induced delusion of many.
- Illuminati
- Or a cross-dressing Japanese man with an outdated profile on facebook.
It has been predicted that the bitcoin will eventually become currency of choice for mastermind hacker Aulian J'ssange.
Currency Value
To the extent that one cannot pay for a blowjob with bitcoins, except for perhaps from a gay, Thai, libertarian aspie, bitcoins are worthless. Jew will point out that the exchange rate between bitcoins and US dollars is steadily increasing, dodging the fact that no one has ever purchased real sex with the currency, but this is a ploy to get your money.
Traders
It is well known that bitcoins have practical value on the web enabling you to purchase lucrative goods such as T-shirts, bandwidth and gay-porn. Currently the Bitcoin community is undergoing a major expansion with the urban myth of one aspie having managed to purchase a pizza using them. Such stories are highly speculative and experts are currently undecided whether such things have actually happened. Nonetheless Bitcoiners continue to exchange with gummi bears and macaroni chips, in the goal of increasing their holdings.
Trolling the Bitcoin forum is easy. Just claim that Satoshi isn't Japanese. Because the bitcoin is pegged to AZNs, traders will vigorously defend his alleged ancestry, so as to protect their investment. Also, many traders espouse various flavors of libertarianism and anarchism. Just cursorily review this article and apply its contents on the forum.
Technical
Nobody knows. However, Wikipedia hates Bitcoin. Additionally, Bitcoin is more l337 than Wirtland.
Why
If you are a batshit crazy libertarian then here's your chance to engage in your own subversive way and become a superhero. Now everyone on the net can be a real-life strongman from the safety of their computers. You can trade them for free meaning that you're now free to aquire even more gummi bears.
Because the coins gain value, the entire ponzi scheme is guaranteed $$$. Getting your grandma to invest her savings is a sure-fire way to infinite success, wealth and bitches. The entire pyramid is explained to be worth $1.3 mirrions, although Bitcoiners conveniently forget to explain that is not $1.3 mirrions of real monies.
—IRC user explaining the intricacies of Bitcoin | ||
With a sales pitch like that anyone is sold. Of course they also forget to mention that the cost of creating new bitcoins is more than the bitcoins themselves.
The major sell of bitcoins is the ability to engage with other aspies forum whoring and trading your play-money for "goods". There's even talk of a convention to allow Bitcoiners to speculate on the identity of the creator while dressed as giant gold coins, or cross-dressing Japanese men.
It has been rumored that making a wish and sending 10 bitcoins to the address 13w7qx24QxjBxztENXV7Bqyck5QpFJy9c2 will grant you a 48.6% chance of the wish coming true.
