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RIAA

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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WARNING:

With Jews, you lose!
MUSIC PIRACY IS EQUIVALENT TO SELLING CRACK, HEROIN, AND METH COMBINED WITHOUT SELLING OR INTOXICATION

The RIAA, also known as The MAFIAA, is an extremely important and vital organization of Jews created with the sole purpose of jacking up CD prices and suing people who own music in any form. The RIAA's President is a fat Jew dyke who enjoys taking kids and old people to court because they downloaded "Happy Birthday" and other public domain holiday songs, gives rimjobs to record label presidents and "recently" apologized for being so mean and unfunny to everybody.

Actual RIAA ad
A rare screenshot from within RIAA headquarters

In the 2008 trial of the RIAA vs The Pirate Bay, the RIAA were seeking $13 million dollars in damages for 34 cases of copyright infringement - one per file. That means the download of one file, song, movie or video game is worth about $382,353. Vanilla Ice has produced 112 songs, according to the RIAA his entire catalogue is worth $42,823,529. The average 8GB iPod can hold about 2,000 songs. According to the RIAA, that's worth $764,705,882 dollars, making it the most valuable object pound-for-pound on the planet. It's estimated that over the entire existance of The Pirate Bay, there's been roughly a billion downloads. That's $382 trillion dollars. Counting all sources, from cash to stocks to banks, roughly $8.3 trillian dollars exist in the world. According to the RIAA, The Pirate Bay has stolen about 46 times more dollars than actually exist on Earth.

Fact sheet

  1. RIAA is not a mammal.
  2. RIAA fights injustice ALL the time.
  3. The purpose of the RIAA is to flip out and sue people.
  4. In 2005, at least 100 pounds of sand were removed from the vaginas of RIAA employees and attorneys.
  5. Like child predators, the RIAA takes pleasure in tracking down children and raping them for all they are worth.
  6. The RIAA loves the horse cock.
  7. The RIAA thinks they have jurisdiction outside of the USA.
  8. RIAA has become one with the Corporate Cunts ideology.
  9. It's founded, owned, and run by Jews.
  10. You need to bring the RIAA down NOW.

What The RIAA Will Do To You

What The RIAA Will Do For You

 

Grandmothers and Lawsuits

 

The RIAA has a severe dislike of old people, particularly those of female persuasion. After the aforementioned old person's grandson downloaded a fuck all amount of songs off a "-ster" site, they did not go after the site (That would occur later in what would become World War 2.0), they didn't even go after the thieving little bastard, they instead went after the grandmother.

They sued her for every penny she had, totally raping her retirement plan, and crushing what spirit she had left. Feminazis everywhere went batshit crazy, the AARP collectively suffered a stroke, and lawyers everywhere shook their heads (while secretly lining their pockets from the lawsuits).

The RIAA recently published a new article warning pregnant women of possible birth defects due to listening to pirated death metal. It went on to mention that syphilis and AIDS are both caused by the continued piracy and circulation of copyrighted music. A piratekiller has been preemptively deployed to punish those pirates who are responsible for this suffering.

Interestingly enough, one of the joys of living in Canada (aside from the free health care which includes free surgeries that would cost $1,000,000,000 USD and the pain meds that are epic win) is that the MPAA and RIAA have no legal clout. Canada levies a tax on all recordable media like CD-R's, cassettes and VHS tapes that is paid as hush money to the RIAA and MPAA. This allows Canadians to download, archive and share MP3's and AVI movies freely and burn "archival copies in the format of their choice" at will. When the RIAA attempted to bend Canadians over the desk and ass rape them for intellectual property theft, Canadians as a whole laughed in their faces and pointed to the taxation and copyright laws that state that a Canadian can download, share and fuck the RIAA up the ass at will because they are given money to shut the fuck up. In short, Canada pwns the asses of the MPAA and RIAA. This is the only known reason to live in the frozen wasteland of fail called Canada. Too bad loli is illegal.

It might also have something to do with the fact that they are THEIR OWN INDEPENDENT COUNTRY WITH THEIR OWN SEPARATE LEGAL SYSTEM.

Recently, however, there has been quite a few changes that could make living in Canada suck.

Wicked Logic


Intellectual property = Actual property

Leaked Video

 
 
"It is a link to a lot of other crimes, and I tell the prosecutors and the police officers that I work with all the time. 'Use this type of crime as a tool. This might lead you to a drug investigaion. It might allow you to have a probable cause for a drug house. You couldn't get in before, but now you can get in by purchasing, doing undercover purchases of CDs.' It also has links to some terrorist organisations for thoses federal prosecutors out there, as number of cases they're working on right now, but what we were saying is also a link to selling drugs with the CDs."
 

 

—Deborah Robinson - Regional Counsel, Anti-Piracy Div., RIAA

Do you know anyone who owns blank CD's? They may be a terrorist! Watch this informative video and report any suspicious behavior to your local law enforcement.

http://thepiratebay.org/tor/4034469/RIAA_Training_Video__Prosecution_of_Music_Piracy Isohunt mirror


 



'What Kinda Peckertrack would Abuse the DMCA!?'
BEHOLD! the Dark Stain of DMCA Abusing Dograpists!
Brett Keane...Frank'sVoice...Inmendham...MPAA...VenomFangX

See Also

AOTN of January 28 and 29, 2012
Preceded by
Jfreedan
RIAA Succeeded by
Meme Combining
 
 
RIAA is part of a series on acronyms

[BRB LOLWTFBBQ]

Internets Lingo

AFAIKASLBFFBRBBTFOBTWCBFDBIDFCFFSFTFYFTWG2GGGGTFOIAWTCIDGAFIDKIIRCILYIMOIMHOISHYGDDTJ/KJFCLMAOLOLM/F?NSFWOMGQFTPHPROFLRTFMSNCASTFUSTFWSWTFTMITNDTTYLWTFYGGRYWNBAWZOMG

Other Lingo

BCCFIRRIBFYIADFUBARGABYAWIDIFTLPITRTLAYHBT

Internet Places/Group

CDCFCTCFYADGNAAIRCLUEPP4LTJCTOTSE

Moar Internet Shit

BBQGNUGPG4WinMTPMMORPGP2PPGPROR

IRL Acronyms

BBSBCEBDICGNWTITT TechJFKNORPPBYOLO

Bad Acronyms

ACLUACMAACORNALFATFBDSMBLPCIACPCSDDMCAEDLESRBFBIFAFFAFNBIWFL.U.L.Z.MGTOWMPAAMTPMUGENNAMBLANEDMRIAASPHSPLCTBBTTOWWWJD

 

RIAA is part of a series on

Music

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