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Chelsea Manning
Chelsea Elizabeth Manning⚧ (Deadname: Bradley Edward Manning) is a pretty pretty princess who recently obtained her svelte figure on the popular "7 years in prison diet." Chelsea Manthing's claim to fame involves leaking over 9,000 classified documents to WikiLeaks and something about Cablegate. Last Thursday, Chelsea added even more butts to the pile of butthurt he wreaked over his transition when he appeared in public with numerous figures who claim to not be alt-right but all of Twitter is sure that they are totally neo-Nazis and they deserve a good punching. So Manning is either a heroic whistleblower or a Russian plant designed to spoil the election of some senator in Delaware, depending on which Twitter-conspiracy-theory you believe.
Pissing off the Right
Republicans and other Nazis were initially skeptical that sticking on a bad wig in a car and smearing on some lipstick is enough to turn a guy into a girl. I mean, you can't just slap a USAF logo on a DeathGlider, and yet she has managed to become the darling of many tranny-chasing EDiots with her excellent trollery of just about everyone in America. The right was also pissed that Barack Obama would commute her sentence and speculated that he pardoned her because she knows too much about Pizzagate and is therefore ineligible for the Clinton Body Count program of inconvenient persons disposal.
Pissing off the Left
In January 2018, Chelsea attended a party held by several prominent Trump supporters, and using all her courage, she waded into the sea of Trump supporters and found value in their company and they were entertained by her impressive oration. Within seconds Twitter-leftists had exploded into allegations of newfound Neo-Nazism from the segment of Twitter that is easily butthurt by milk and the "okay" hand gesture, and hilariously divided the left into a thousand pieces, each of them butthurt, with many claiming that this is what makes her a "traitor" instead of her original sin of leaking state secrets (before that became accepted and commonplace).
See also
- Adrian Lamo
- Phobos, the prettiest princess of them all
- SNOWDEN, Edward
- The Tale of the traveling Afghan War Diaries
- WikiLeaks
| Featured article January 25 & 26, 2018 | ||
| Preceded by Porsche Girl |
Chelsea Manning | Succeeded by TBD |