Toilet Seat

The toilet seat is a non-essential part of most lavatories. It is of little interest to men except when taking a crap. However, it seems to be of great importance to women.

Little is known about the precise relationship between women and toilet seats, but it seems that when a woman encounters a supposed incorrectly configured toilet seat she explodes, often doing significant damage to the surrounding area, potentially including your home, your toilet, your mom and you. She will then go online and bitch about this in her Livejournal (if she is young) or on Yahoo! Answers (if she is not). Some believe that this relationship between women and toilet seats has been created by Lifetime, the television network otherwise known as Satan. Others blame it on Tim Allen and other unfunny comedians who took their own wives' neuroses and influenced other women to adopt them.

A man will see this and attempt a humorous rebuttal, which is completely wrong. The correct response is in fact to shoot the bitch in the face. Or you can just piss with the toilet seat down, since it has a FUCKING HOLE IN IT.

Male trolls who like danger can try to pull off this argument on a Woman preemptively. This so-called first strike involves pulling the same shit in reverse, starting a fight because she left the toilet seat down. While this won't generate lulz for the man, it will however generate lulz and sympathy in unimaginable amounts from every other male on the planet.