Kill it with fire

Kill It With Fire

File:120px-Kill it with fire scorpio.gif An early example. Kill it with fire!

Since time immemorial, man has used fire as an easy, effective tool for the disposal of unwanted things and, as they are certainly not excluded, unwanted people.

You can't really trace down the exact point in time when fire pwnage began, simply because it was invented at least 100 years ago by our spiritual forebearers hellenic brothers.

In the world of Pokémon, Charizard is well known for pwning its enemies with fire. However since Pokémon is unfunny, fire can be pwned with water, which can be pwned with electricity, which can be pwned with ground, which can be pwned with grass, which can be pwned... WITH FIRE!

It's Been Around Forever.

Killing with fire is one of the most far-reaching pastimes of Old European and American Societies. Pretty much anyone who wasn't getting it was dishing it out.

People who were killed with fire include:

• Robo Jews (south park)
• Jews (Lollercaust)
• Fags
• African Americans
• You
• Japs (in their case nuclear fire)
• Atheists
• Fucktards
• Goths
• Furries
• Cats
• Emos
• Weeaboos
• Christians
• Spies
• Every convicted or confessed Harry Potter fueled witch from the Salem witch trials.
• Joan of Arc was burned alive because she was convicted of blasphemy. Proving once again that when you try to tell people about god, you should be killed with fire.
• Staypuft marshmallow man was burned to death by no less than four positron beams. His only crime? Being a fatty.
• Joe Chapman
• Your Mom
• Beyond Birthday

Fire made it gloriously easier to exterminate all those who needed to GTFO or those who were just blatantly doing it wrong.

Why Fire?

“	The very existence of flamethrowers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.	„
—George Carlin

Well, it's quite simple; fire makes killing people lulzy. Nothing causes more lulz than watching a writhing swarm of Furfags die in a blaze of glory or seeing that Goth Bitch who claims to have majikal control over flames get what she had been asking for... and then burning her.

Hell, it also makes a good warning sign to others if you go ahead and burn them on your own property or wherever their kind aren't welcome. Nothing says, "Stay off of my lawn, nigger!" Like the smoldering corpse of his thieving brother.

The PS3 Version

The long awaited PS3 title, due for release x-mas 2009. GAME'S OUT, GO GET IT

The British game developer Uncle Andross announced in early August that they plan to release Kill It With Fire for the PS3 just in time for the 2009 holiday season. A trailer will most likely be posted to Youtube sometime in the coming weeks. Although some gamers will not like this game, the most reliable sources have speculated that the majority of them are happy to learn of the new title.

Kill It With Fire chronicles the adventures of some guy as he journeys through eight magical worlds killing shit with fire and reaping the rewards of being stronger than all of the womanz he encounters. As he earns moar xp he learns new and useful abilities. All in all, he's a pretty cool guy. eh kills it with fire and doesn't afraid of anything.

“	Does this game be played on Xbox360 too?!	„
—360 Kid

“	The best feature of our game is its unprecedented USB functionality. For the first time in the history of the universe gamers will actually be able to... I'll show you later	„
—Uncle Adross

Steps to Killing someone with Fire

1. Pick your prey.
2. If they do not appear fully flammable, douse them in a flammable substance.
3. Set them ablaze with matches NAPALM any source of ignition.
4. Sit back and enjoy the show screams of pain as your victim's blubber (assuming you're burning a 'Merican) catches light.
5. ????
6. Profit!

Kill teh Infected with fire.

See Also

Fire

Death

Olympic Flame