Wikimedia Foundation

The Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. is an alleged charity and Nazi sauerkraut factory located in San Francisco, California, at the corner of Turd and Taylor. But it is in fact a criminal front organization for a global terrorist conspiracy rivaling Al-Qaeda, Scientology, and the Furluminati. Although it is physically located in California, it is chartered under the laws of Florida for the purpose of tax fraud and vaginal grip-strength testing.

Wikimedia Foundation مؤسسة ويكيميديا
Operational	2003-present
Address	149 New Montgomery Street San Francisco, CA 94105
Led by	Chief Turd Jimbo Wales, Special Needs Kammendatessa Lila Tretikov, Master of Bratwurst Shits Erik Möller (lol canned)
Active region(s)	Internet Global
Ideology	Open source, The Internet is serious business
Status	Fraudulent charity
Website	wikimediafoundation.org

According to the Internet Watch Foundation, the WMF has waged a campaign of terror across Web 2.0. Its leader, the outlaw war-pussy Jimmy Wales, known to his fanatical followers as "Jimbo," have defrauded gullible donors for millions of dollars under the guise of helping a mysterious and likely fake "child in Africa." Other purposes for the WMF include sausage manufacturing and insertion, plus the smuggling of fat ugly Russian hookers into the Tenderloin. Many slorgs are kept in vats of puke in the basement, and your mom lives in the penthouse with a baby elephant covered in penises.

Overview

WMF's Sieg-Heil-quarters, also the central warehouse facility for their massive collection of 4-foot-long black dildos and Ayn Rand novels.

As shown below, WMF is the mother of everything related to Jimbo Wales' cash cows and diaper laundromats spawning a number of greasy lard-ass tentacles, such as:

• Wikimedia Commons: created by micro-Hitler Erik Möller in 2004, where wikipedos keep all the multimedia files they have stolen from the internets throughout the years, which they call "free content" material. Not to mention thousands of photos of their own tiny little genitals.
• Wiktionary: betcha didn't know they had a dictionary. Neither do they.
• Wikiquote: full of material stolen directly from Bartlett's and other websites. Loves Douglas Adams.
• Wikiversity: Jimbo's attempt to infest academia, dying since 2011.
• Wikinews: just like Faux News but dumber and screamier, completely incompetent management, and dying since 2011.
• Wikibooks: allegedly a collection of free textbooks, available under the GFDL license. Wikibooks includes Wikijunior and piles of utter trivial shit material no one in their right mind would put on paper. Also dying since 2011.
• Uncyclopedia: the magnum opus of boredom, stupidity and everything unfunny. People will claim that Uncyclopedia, the most tedious "comedy site" in history, has no connection to Wikipedia. That would be wrong: Uncyclopedia is hosted by Jimbo's company Wikia and is infested with Wikipedians.
• Simple Wikipedia: a special place for special morons.
• And other shit. Including Wikipedias in 288 languages, most of which are basically "dead" projects. It costs almost nothing to host these minor projects, because English Wikipedia (and Commons, as the image repository) gets the greatest share of traffic. Everything else the WMF does is an afterthought, usually created to make them look "more important" and more "charity-ish".

Diagram

The ugly truth.

Fundraising

Mad pimpin', yo (please note that two of these "people" no longer work there, lolol)

The Wikimedia Foundation has amassed $42 million $55 million in donations from pimply nerds who believe their donations go towards keeping the servers going, and regular maintenance stuff. But the fact is, these donations are wasted on horribly mismanaged software development teams, and a rehash of Liquid Threads, which was already mostly developed for free, anyway (plus occasional champagne parties). Someone did a count of how many chicks there are in the Wikipedia community, a community obsessed with identity hiding, anonymity, and transgender issues, and the result of this totally accurate scientific study was that the Wikipedia community is 91% male.[4] Because women can not wrap their delicate little womanheads around wiki-markup, Wikipedia has condescendingly awarded them the gift of the VisualEditurd... their punishment for not being in the kitchen.

Why do people keep on giving, even though the Wikimedia Foundation has too much money already? Simple, really. Participants in this scam claim that the Wikimedia Foundation is poor.

	“	Mr Gerard joked that due to the site's limited financial resources, some of its infrastructure relied on "gaffer tape and string".	„
	—The BBC, who are easily fooled

	“	Here's why it hasn't happened: We're poor. It's that simple. We don't have a lot of money to pay large teams of app developers.	„
	— (WMF) Jorm (WMF), lying through his teeth about why the Wikipedia app for iOS devices is so bad

Thank goodness these donors are getting their money's worth:

“	“The Foundation has a miserable cost/benefit ratio and for years now has spent millions on software development without producing anything that actually works; the feeling is that the whole operation is held together with the goodwill of its volunteers and the more stupid Foundation managers are seriously hacking them off”	„

FAQ on WMF

Wikijunior pet.

• What is the mission of the Foundation ?

The mission of the WMF is to empower Jimbo Wales and his henchmen (particularly the Wikipedia Jews and oddly the Mormons), by collecting carefully chosen information under a free content license, and to disseminate it globally, according to the Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

• Is WMF a charity?

Sorta. In the same way that the Church of Scientology could be considered a charity.

• Which projects do they support?
  • Jimbo Wales' washing machine [5].
  • Role-playing games
  • General racketeering
  • Shitty broken extensions like MoodBar, VisualEditor and Flow

• Where does the money come from?

Through donations of retarded philanthropists, who have no clue that Jimbo spends their money on whores and Mad Dog 20/20. [6] Oh, and also from, er, "private benefactors". [7] Some of whom are allowed to edit their own Wikipedia articles, because Jimbo wuv them.

• Does WMF have audited financial statements?

Yes. Their auditor is KPMG. KPMG is the premier accounting firm when it comes to creating tax shelters and inventing the newest tax evasion schemes. They are currently facing thousands of lawsuits from investors, bankrupt corporations and state and local governments, not to mention huge bills for meth and Ecstasy. Plus, Wikipedia being as corrupt as it is, KPMG is allowed to edit their own Wikipedia article. Badly. [8]

• Does WMF files a tax return?

Yes. KPMG prepares it. You can access their tax return for free at guidestar.org - just register and a minute later you will have a template to create a non-profit scam. To create a bank holding company and apply for TARP funding - visit fdic.gov - detailed instructions provided. If you are too lazy to register and see Wikimedia foundation's tax return - here is a summary of the most important details, processed for extra lulz and accuracy:

• Revenue: $6,500,000 (donations and the like) $42 million in 2012 and $55 mill in 2014

• Expenses: $~2,500,000 (actual hosting costs)

• Scam fees: $1,500,000 (auditors fee to keep the scam going)

• Profit for owners embezzlers and parasites: $FUCKTON

• Lila's salary: $ 280,000

• Möller's butt plugs $ 180,000

• Wikipedia's Admins: $ 0

• You: $ 0

• Jimbo's salary: $ Jimbo is paid in Russian hookers and glow-in-the-dark condoms

Some of the butt-faces at the Wikimedia Foundation (aka homosexual porn)

• 
  Jimmy Wales, Con Man, Sole Founder of TOW.
• 
  (WMF) Philippe Beaudette, scrotum protector
• 
  Mako Hill Benjamin Mako Hill when he was still sexy
• 
  New Chairman Grorious Hi Supreme Reader Ting Chen.
• 
  Stu West, underpants gnome, installed by Marc Andreessen as his spy.
• 
  Samuel Klein, whore wrangler
• 
  Jan-Bart de Vreede, batshit insane, runs hosting company in Netherlands that WMF uses
• 
  Kat Walsh, Wikimedian, who Ironholds likes to pin to the wall
• 
  Arne Klempert (LOL TOSSED)
• 
  Matt Halprin, spy sent by Pierre Omidyar
• 
  Bishakha Datta, token Indian
• 
  Phoebe Ayers, BA in Engrish literature, a librarian who wants to destroy libraries and replace them with Wikipedia
• 
  Florence Nibart-Devouard, deposed chair LOL FIRED
• 
  Joady Lohr, the idiot responsible for hiring these people
• 
  (WMF) Steven (WMF), "product manager" LOL FIRED
• 
  (WMF) Jorm (WMF) would like your donations plz (LOL HISTORY)
• 
  On second thought, Jorm proposes a vastly superior use of your money. LOL FIRED
• 
  Ironholds, disgraced former Wikipedia sysop, now employed by the WMF LOL
• 
  These tattoos might as well say 'I will never meet a woman'
• 
  WMF waves to that African kid Jimbo won't shut up about
• 
  The child in Africa is all grown up and has an unpaid position at the Foundation
• 
  Donkey-dicked Deskana, aka Dan Garry, Master of Pokemons
• 
  Wikipedia tattoos are always an excellent life decision
• 
  Ryan Corbett Smith, aka Kaldari and Kaldari Ryan Kaldari. The latest in a series of Foundation employees to be desysopped in disgrace. It was discovered he operates a site dedicated to mocking dead children (site gutted after his faggotry was exposed) after he accused a contributor of making fun of the suicide of a Wikipedian.[1][2][3]
• 
  SarahStierch, whose salary from the Foundation was so low that she had to take a paid editing gig, which embarrassed the Jimbo, so she was fired. It turns out that Stierch was making much less than the male employees of the Foundation. LOL FIRED
• 
  Brett Gibbs, aka Pine. BFF with missing-dong collector Dcoetzee

See also

• Angela Beesley
• Tentacle rape
• Erik Möller
• Ironholds

External Links

• Wikimedia
• WMF goes to Africa
• They're hiring! Now it's your chance to infiltrate

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Wikimedia Foundation is a part of a series on Wikis