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Chile: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 13:36, 1 November 2011
Chile is a settlement of gangsters, whores, drug dealers, thieves (the bests in the world) and flaytes (the Chilean version of chavs). It is located in the west coast of South America, they hate their neighbours (Peru, and Bolivia, and love-some Argentina) because they are shit but they love eurofags and gringos because they have money and they are easy targets for the national thieves. Chileans speak some kind of Spanish with a funny accent plus some indigenous words and a very complex slang; even if you speak Spanish, you will not be able to understand a Chilean unless you are one of them. Anyways, if you become friend of a Chilean he/she will be the best friend you ever have, they are very loyal people and also you get ensure that he/she will not steal something that belongs to you.
History
Before the Spanish fags came to steal the gold, Chile was inhabited by mighty warriors with extra-large cocks called Mapuche, they both had a 300-years war and Mapuche where one of the few pre-hispanic cultures that didn't disappear like the other weak cunts. Oddly, many wealthy white Chileans are French, British and Croatians.
Chile being an uninhabited COLD part of South America, the government in the 19th and early 20th centuries invited a few European people to settle the land, and took their mestiza/castiza women to have babies with, to make them lighter, brighter and whiter. In other words, Chileans like the German Argentines and Italian EUROguays are a bastardized race.
Until the early 70's Chile used to be a shit country like Peru but then something great happened to the nation. Augusto Pinochet A.K.A. "The Liberator" (the unrecognized son of Hitler) named himself President of Chile, killed and tortured over 9000 people for the lulz and made the country become better and stronger.
Chilean People
Chileans are extremely smart people who sometimes, when bored, go to countries like Sweden, Denmark, Spain, France (since so many Chileans are Basque), Holland, Australia, Canada or the USA to take advantage from their hyper-developed culture and live for free and have some time to ponder about life.
Chile also have the largest Palestinian community in the world outside israel, as well there's alot of Greeks, Japanese, Koreans and a few Polynesian folk, and Cherokee Indians too! Yeah, a melting pot, the whole UN!
In Chile being a thief is synonymous with being cool, so the dream of every Chilean kid is to become a professional thief, rob a bank, escape to Europe, rape a woman, have a child, become citizen and live for free. Also, in Chile is very common that if someone needs something they rob the house next door. And finally, in Chile people steal things just for fun, you can see drunk middle-class cunts assaulting the corner shop with guns just because they want to feel the adrenaline.
Chileans tend to not like Jews (except Don Francisco on Sabado Gigante) and can't stand Black People (they took in Haitians), but the main problem is they are like Californians, New Zealand and South Africa to some extent.
Calling FOOTBALL "soccer" in front of a Chilean is considered an insult and it's very probable that you'll get bashed, raped, and assaulted.
"Don't mess with the chilean lads!" <--- a Chilean who was learning English said that. Be careful!!
Typical Chilean Fight
a few words, then the guy stabs the other one in the heart and the stabbed one tells the cameraman "do you see me worried??" and shows the injury to the camera.
Tom green trolls a chilean
Typical chilean teen (Emos, Pokemones, Glams, Flaites, Lais, Tecktoniks)
Hatelist
Chilean Hates:
- Peru
- Bolivia
- Argentina
- Mining
- Poor people
- Rich people
- $ebastian Pinera
- Spanish
- Americans
- Muslim
- Communists
- Niggers
- Policemen
- Earthquakes
- People from Santiago (if you are from another city)
- People from another city (if you are from Santiago)
Chilean Like-somes:
- Michelle Bachelet
- Augusto Pinochet
- Salvador Allende
- Money
- Nazis
- Racism
National Heroes
- Augusto Pinochet (Libertador): this man is the number one hero of Chile, he cleaned the country of Commies and gave Chile a great economy.
- Lanza Internacional (the international thief): a Chilean thief living la vida loca in spain, he appeared in the news saying what he does in Spain, he owns 2 cars and he is "upholstered in jewerly", he also tells that he has killed 2 Spaniards and he doesn't care.
- Checho del Boom: sex-symbol of the Chilean lumpenproletariat, he is known by his videos in youtube where he appears sending regards to his friends.
- Snooki: famous for being an Oompa-Loompa on Jersey Shore. Adopted by rich white Italian-American family.
- Pipeinformatico: fat man, paraplegic and has no sphincter control. Also wants to be an influential twitterer which is impossible.
- Chilean National Tennis Team - won Gold in the 2004 Summer Olympiad, while the Chilean National Soccer team FAILs in FIFA World Cup history (1962! What a year it was. Held on home turf. They won third place. !VIVA CHILE! LULZ.)
FUN FACT
Hardly 1% of the country are Black people, mostly Haitians came to find work. Not much African slaves were there in Chile. But they have Easter Island to pick up slave labor, as well Antarctica to dump unwanted public charges. Now I know how it goes.