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Anabelle Lotus: Difference between revisions

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== The Cause of Death ==
== The Cause of Death ==


The mother blamed the hospital for the death of her child, but it had more to do with her being a [[fat|wild hambeast]] of a mother who was too busy shoveling [[drug|Xanax]] and [[FAS|beer]] (which she bragged about on her MySpoos) into her gaping maw to notice she was six months [[pregnant]]. (TL;DR — [[Science|Infants of fat mothers do die. A lot. It's a side effect of mom being a hambeast and making too much insulin and other hormones, which affects fetal development. So in reality, her body probably killed the little bastard.]])
The mother blamed the hospital for the death of her child, but it had more to do with her being a [[Fat|wild hambeast]] of a mother who was too busy shoveling [[Xanax]] and [[beer]] (which she bragged about on her [[MySpace]]) into her gaping mouth to notice she was six months [[pregnant]]. (TL;DR — [[Science|Infants of fat mothers do die. A lot. It's a side effect of mom being a hambeast and making too much insulin and other hormones, which affects fetal development. So in reality, her body probably killed the little bastard.]])


Other theories include:
Other theories include:

Revision as of 02:02, 10 September 2012

Natural selection in action.
NINJA DOWN
Between the two, there's maybe 90 IQ points at most.
The mom-to-be-only-to-not shows off her Juggalettes.

Anabelle Lotus was born on Mothers Day, May 11th 2008, in Chicago. Upon seeing her mother for the first time, the shocked infant refused to live any longer., thus proving that Juggalos should not copulate. Both parents — mother Julie (a down-on-her-luck Jugglette) and father Joseph — were heartbroken. They proved their love and profound sadness for their lost innocent daughter the only way their meth-rotted juggalo brains knew how: by giving her an Insane Clown Posse-themed funeral. The casket was covered in hatchet-man stickers, ICP songs were played, and Faygo was drunk to the honor of the fallen ninjette. The mourning juggalo army showed up in their finest Hot Topic hoodies at the request of the grieving parents. Thankfully (for us), someone took the time to post pictures on the internet.

The Cause of Death

The mother blamed the hospital for the death of her child, but it had more to do with her being a wild hambeast of a mother who was too busy shoveling Xanax and beer (which she bragged about on her MySpace) into her gaping mouth to notice she was six months pregnant. (TL;DR — Infants of fat mothers do die. A lot. It's a side effect of mom being a hambeast and making too much insulin and other hormones, which affects fetal development. So in reality, her body probably killed the little bastard.)

Other theories include:

It's common knowledge in the medical field that massively obese women give birth to higher numbers of underweight babies, premies, and stillborns. Due to Political Correctness, doctors are not allowed to list "The Mother is a Wild Hambeast" as the cause of death. Thus, the mothers don't know they killed their own baby, and blame the hospitals. Retards.

Juggalo Julz's MySpace

OHRA the clown says: Thumbs up!

For a brief while, Anonymous could glimpse the MySpaces of Juggalo Julz and babydaddy Joe. If anyone was left with any notion that Julz and Joe would have made fit parents, they joyously removed all doubt as Julz and Joe proclaimed their love of drugs (Julz's favorite being Xanax), and had numerous pictures of the two of them imbibing alcohol. Not to mention the numerous images portraying children doing drugs. To add to the lulz, Julz had written some Godawful emo/juggalo poetry, with the majority of the lines borrowed from ICP songs. Many lulz were had until Anonymous started leaving its condolences and the MySpaces were immediately set to private.

Update: They are no longer private.

WFuckOff Radio

Shortly after finishing off what nature had started, Julie called ICP's online radio show WFuckOff Radio to alert the Juggalo world of her dead baby. To show how grief-stricken she is, Julie goes on a 7 minute rant, taking advantage of her baby's death to complain about how she hasn't gotten any free merchandise from Psychopathic Records (mailmen don't deliver to trailers).

Previous Video | Next Video

4 months prior to giving birth to a dead Juggalo, Julie and her husband called ICP's online radio show WFuckOffRadio and talked to Psychopathic label mates Jamie Madrox of the band Twiztid and Blaze Ya Dead Homie. Instead of enjoying a nice Juggalo love conversation, Julie gets absolutely ripped on by the two artists and even threatens to stop listening to their music. Julie eventually makes her husband get on the phone, and while he is, foreshadows the dead juggalo baby that's on the way.

The ICP radio hosts accuse of her of being a hermaphrodite and having a PENIS for 14 minutes:

Part 1

Part 2

Previous Video | Next Video

GIEF FRREE MONEYS PLOX?/?

Opportunity Knocks

One of the most notable parts of this whole fiasco was Juggalo Julia's call into one of WFuckOff Radio's shows The Funhouse, where she asked people to give her free stuff because she killed her baby.

After this, anon has now pledged to do the right thing and raid every broadcast on WFuckOff radio. IRC chats and topics will be posted accordingly. A live airtime schedule for the shows can be found here.

The only shows you'll want to call into are the shows listed below, as they are primarily call-in shows. Shows not listed below are more talk/less call-in; thus, raids are not successful. Only call when the following shows are on the air:

  • The Witching Hours (Hosted by: Violent J)
  • Shaggy's Old Vinyl Collection (Hosted by: Shaggy 2 Dope and DJ Clay)
  • Ashtrays and Action Figures (Hosted by: Twiztid)
  • The Warpath (Hosted by: ABK)
  • The Coffin (Hosted by: Blaze)
  • The Hootenanny (Hosted by: Boondox)
  • The Funhouse (Hosted by: Upchuck the Clown)
  • Off the Clock (Hosted by: Leah and Nathan Extra)

It is a free online broadcast that will open with VLC player and most other media players.

WFuckOff Radio Call in line: 1-248-306-5616

Lulzy Audio

The Internet Funeral Notice (lol, dox)

From Anabelle's Mama, Juggalo Jules:

NINJETTE DOWN

MY LITTLE NINJETTE DIED 1 IN A MILLION MEDICAL ERROR..FOR NO REASON. THE DOCTORS SHOOK THERE HEADS AT ME AND SAID WERE DONT KNOW WHY OR HOW. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? MY DAUGHTER SHOULD BE IN MY ARMS RIGHT NOW AND SHES GONE AND THATS PRICELESS TO ME!!! I PROMISED MY LOTUS I WOULD GET JUSTICE FOR HER DEATH TO MY VERY LAST BREATH! PLEASE HELP A JUGGALO FAMILY OUT.....

EVERY & ANY JUGGALO & JUGGALETTE IS INVITED TO MY BABY NINJETTE ANABELLE LOTUS KRAWCZYK FUNERAL..WERE ALL A FUCK’N FAMILY AND OUR LITTLE LOTUS IS GONE TO SHANGRI-LA... PLEASE WRITE ME BACK HERE OR EMAIL IF U WILL COME. IM STILL MAKING ARRANGEMENTS. ON DATE OR TIME YET..

BEST WISHES ~

PLEASE WEAR ANYTHING DARK LOTUS OR IF U FONT HAVE LOTUS ANYTHING PSYCHOPATHIC GEAR TO HER FUNERAL

PLEASE JUGGALOS IF U CAN DONATE ANYTHING EVEN .

$0.01 OR $1. OO WILL HELP US TO GET A HEADSTONE FOR OUR DAUGHTER.

YOU CAN DONATE AT THE FUNERAL OR IF U CANT ATTEND PLEASE FEEL FREE TO STILL DONATE ANYTHING TO OUR HOME AND EMAIL ME ON HERE AND I WILL SEND U MY ADDRESS...

PLEASE BRING A LOTUS FLOWER THEY ARE SO RARE TO FIND. OR PLEASE TELL ME WHERE I CAN FIND ONE.. IM HAVING A LOT TROUBLE FINDING IT...

PLEASE FAMILY COME AND SUPPORT US IN OUR DARKEST HOUR...NINJA DOWN

MCL JULIE & JOE

WHERE ~ MALEC & SONS FUNERAL HOME

ADDRESS ~ 6000 N. MILWAUKEE AVE. CHICAGO IL 60646

FUNERAL HOME PHONE ~ 773 - 774 - 4100

DATE ~ FRIDAY MAY 23 2008

TIME ~ 9:00AM - 1:00PM (Service starts at !:00pm then we go to the cemetery)

  • REMEMBER AT A FUNERAL WE ALL FOLLOW TOGETHER TO THE CEMETERY AFTER THE SERVICE.....

LAYED TO REST AT ~ EDEN CEMETERY

ADDRESS ~ 9851 W. IRVING PARK ROAD SCHILLER PARK IL 60176

CEMETERY PHONE ~ 847 - 678 - 1631

  • WE PRAY TO SEE ALL JUGGALOS THERE FOR ANABELLE LOTUS....

THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT, A GRIEVING JUGGALO MOTHER & FATHER

CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR SYMPATHETIC.

Quotes

   
“ 		 
that is a horrible thing to go threw. and its completely shity that it did happen. i got yer emial. and when my ninja gets home im gunna tell him about it and we will prolly send a donation. much love and respect.
  		„
  		 

—Mrs.Madrox™[Keepn It Hella Simple][TSQ], the kind of idiot stupid enough to send monies

   
“ 		 
sounds like a plan,if you lived near me i could get you some greens

i feel ya on the whole bud situation,i wanna get blown right now i hope you feel better soon though for real
 

„
  		 

—Ironik (EULOGY), feels your loss, and your jonesin for a hit.

   
“ 		 
gg biotch. i hope you arent blaming innocent doctors for this. yeah drinking, smoking and bumping xanax while pregnant had NOTHING to do with your baby's death.
  		„
  		 

—Keri!, lulz

   
“ 		 
fuck off all u haters! fuck off my girl! aint yo buesness. who dopnt eat food? and who dont smoke erb? mad fuck off anyways u dont like it
  		„
  		 

—Juggalo Julz, mother knows best

   
“ 		 
Thank god it was too dumb to breed properly.
  		„
  		 

—Aaron, saying what we are all thinking

   
“ 		 
Were there painted faces at this funeral?

Did the attendees all do a sad "Woop Woop" when the box was lowered to the ground? How come they didn't play "Casket"? How come they didn't play "Renditions of Reality"?
 

„
  		 

—Pirates on Cassette, on the ICP forum, asking the failing questions

Previous Quote | Next Quote

Dead Baby Man

One of the Insane Clown Posse's most popular songs amongst their fans is "Dead Body Man".

Considering the recent events, it was found most appropriate to re-invent the song, replacing every reference to "dead bodies" with "dead babies". Please feel free to send this to Julie and all of her friends.

Artist: Insane Clown Posse
Song: Dead Baby Man (Anabelle Lotus 2008 Remix)

Dead babies, dead babies all over the street
Fifty-five, sixty-five babies at least
I hang with the stiffs till the break of dawn
I'm always finding babies when I'm mowing the lawn
Drag em in the house, throw em in the oven
Wicked clown lovin' that dead baby gloven
Tastes like chicken finger lickin' deep fried
I ate a dead baby, but don't tell, I lied
I just ate my first dead baby last week
Still gots the finger nail caught in my teeth
Before you start yelling and cursing my name
Remember something's wrong with my brain, insane
Second I was born, doctor threw me 'gainst the wall
Kicked open the door and he whipped me down the hall
I'm sliding and I'm bouncing off shit like a hockey puck
And my mother's like "What the fuck?!"
He said I was born of an alien race
Born with a hatchet and a juggalo face
But I'm not a martian, you wouldn't understand
I'm just the dead baby man

We got babies, dead babies
We got fat ones, skinny ones
Males, females, hermaphrodites
We got somebodies, we got nobodies
Babies, babies, babies, woo!

Dead babies, dead bodies in the back of my van
All the little kiddies love the dead baby man
I drive through my neighborhood ringing my bell
Some people run cuz they don't like the smell
Others line up just as quick as they can
To try and catch a glimpse of the dead baby man
It's all good, if you can stand the funk, but ah
Just don't look in the trunk
I drive down Central kickin' the bass
Chillin' with Anabelle and I'm pickin' her face
Maggots and bugs like to crawl on her head
Cuz my baby is dead, I'd rather that instead
Than a baby you can't trust, always diggin' a nut
A dead baby bitch learns to keep her mouth shut
Riding in the back is my dead baby crew
Only they can never think of nothing to do
If you think I'm sick take a look at yourself
You got dead deer heads up on your shelf
On your key chain is a little baby rabbit's hand
I'm just the dead baby man

We also collect dead babies
So, if you know any dead babies
Or you yourself are planning on giving birth to one soon
We'll be happy to come to your house
And pay cash for it
We appreciate good healthy stiff
For our dinner
Woohoo!

Call me the dead baby man (some one give em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (just sell em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (you can mail em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (br-bring em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (won't ya give em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (just sell em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (just mail em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (br-bring em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (you can give em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (you can sell em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (won't ya mail em to me)
Call me the dead baby man (you can bring em to me)
Call me the dead baby man, call me the dead baby man

Baby Pictures

Gallery of Fail About missing Pics
  • all the pictures from the funeral.
    all the pictures from the funeral.
  • How to desecrate your child's grave before the coffin is even in the ground.
    How to desecrate your child's grave before the coffin is even in the ground.
  • Baby be pimpin yo
    Baby be pimpin yo
  • There, that's better
    There, that's better
  • "Because the lotus is the only flower with infinite petals."
    "Because the lotus is the only flower with infinite petals."
  • Gone, and soon forgotten.
    Gone, and soon forgotten.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also

External Links

Featured article June 10, 2008
Preceded by
LiveJournal 		Anabelle Lotus Succeeded by
Adam Savage
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