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Your average Thomas fan over the age of 8

YouTube is a home to not only shit videos, but also shit people and communities. These communities either have groups of their own on the site, or are just given collective titles by outsiders to group them together easier. The subject of this article is based on the latter. Enter The Youtube Thomas Club, a thriving, previously undiscovered garden of potential trolling and lulz. The community is mainly made up of man-children, 13 year old boys, and 16 year old girls that apparently jack off to Thomas the Tank Engine. Like all youtube communities based around a children's franchise, the members can get easily offended. If you give their work thumbs down, it will lead to a shitstorm that will last months.

Thomas The Aspie Engine

Charming.

Thomas The Tank Engine & Friends is a monumentally overblown shitfest of a children's television show that proved unusually popular with autists and aspies. It originally started as a series of books written by an English clergyman turned into high budget television by a business woman. This was nothing special, but the show was quite unusual to Amerifat audiences. One notable 'feature' was each train's static leering faces staring right into your soul. Somehow this is charming to certain people. Despite it's fairly simple premise about as deep as a kiddie pool, it caught onto the blooming new generation of autismal children like wildfire. Even real-life railroad lines got into the faggotry by dressing up engines as Thomas characters, which is largely done not for the kiddies but so Thomasfags can jizz on the dressed up engines. Perhaps it was the simple mode of storytelling that gave it appeal, or perhaps it's because it featured trains, the show wasn't going anywhere despite a decided decline in quality (and going by how the show started, that's an achievement) and well past the show's heyday it still wields an unholy fanbase of freaks who never have and never will outgrow it. The fanbase alone is pitiful enough, but the mass of YouTube-prominent members of this group take it to a whole new level.

The basics

The Youtube Thomas Club is a collective term for the various interesting individuals of youtube that still watch Thomas, and have a tendency to make crappy videos in tribute to it. They often use Paint to make faces which often look like shit, they can't even afford Photoshop because they spend most of their money on toy trains. They usually stick together tightly in their little online community because they have no friends IRL. They are rather quiet and often keep to themselves compared to say the Sonic the Hedgehog fanbase, which are very much vocal and tend to breed nutters like Alix Henriol. However, like the Sonic fanbase, it is not difficult to troll these individuals and produce some quick lulz. Most of the members are, unsurprisingly, autistic. This is undoubtedly one reason why the "community" is such a shithole. Likewise, many Thomasfags are also bronies, closeted or otherwise. This says alot about Thomasfags in general.

   
“ 		 
My mom is going to order me ... d-mmm ... do-get hef-the second Henry's tunnel on eBay.
  		„
  		 

— A 20-something year old man on the topic of getting his mother to order him a wooden toy railway accessory

Their videos

With the invention of Windows Movie Maker, even complete dumbasses can make videos. This is evident by the sheer amount of shit produced by these kids and uploaded for other equally thick people to see. There are 8 main types of video that they make:

Model Train Personification

The most common and easiest type of video for Thomas Club members to make. These videos are often produced using old point-and-shoot cameras and involve a prepubertal-sounding person talking to a model train about various things as if it was a real person. When coming across such a video, it is highly advisable to download it, just in case the original uploader takes it down in response to excessive flaming, and then re-upload it afterwards for the entire internet to see.

One of these uploaders, an NYC-area aspie by the name of "Gordon", has recently become famous on /n/ after a glorious anon posted one of his videos there, causing the first and only shitstorm on that board to date.

The tribute/music video

Another common type of video that these aspies jerk off to. These will most often consist of either slides of stolen pictures, or clips from Thomas and Friends, often coupled with with shitty pop songs such as 'Life is a Highway' and other shit aimed at the High School Musical crowd. Failing to get any decent quality footage, these kids will settle on recording episodes off their TV screen using their $10 webcam.


The episode re-enactment

A popular genre that these kids practically orgasm over. Somehow the original stories just weren't good enough and here we have quality re-enactments made by either elitists who gripe over the TV series' adaption or retarded 6 year olds who think remaking an episode is cool and original. These are made by the uploader simply playing with their train toys in their mother's living room while having an episode playing on the TV in the background to create the sound. Very little is done in terms of proper editing, but that clearly doesn't matter. Retards will give it 5 stars no matter what the quality is.

The fan episode

Take the above, except replace audio from the TV with audio of the fucktard uploading the video, mumbling their own horseshit fanfic that is most likely a carbon copy of an existing story except with some name changes, and even when it is not it still sucks.

Admittedly, they are pretty good quality, except that the narrator keeps stammering every ten seconds and the camera work sucks.

Note: Near the end of this shit storyline, the Thomasfag narrating suggests Lady Hatt was raped by partying kidnappers.

The redub

These kids just love adding to the shit pile on YouTube that most people call redubs. The sound is usually ass, the quality of the footage is grainy, and listening to kids (and occasional man-child) trying to imitate their favourite characters is just sad.

The audition

As if the episode re-enactment wasn't bad enough, they have to create their own retarded series that consists of other users "auditioning" for shitty things they call voice roles. They do this by recording themselves trying to talk like one of the trains. If the fucktard accepts their terrible voice, they use it for their stupid series that no one cares about. The sad part is that they think they are successful actors.

Believe it or not, they will do lines for anything. Anything.

Thomas/Cartoon Crossovers

As if the never ending shitpile from the Thomas YouTube club wasn't enough. Some fags steal ideas from cartoons then combine them with Thomas The Tank Engine and noobs actually laugh at this sort of shit. It's bad enough some of these dumbasses still like Thomas, never mind the thought of them having an orgasm over a video that contains no original humor. It's hardly surprising that some cartoons aren't as funny as they used to be when their jokes are being brought down to this level of shit..

Thomas Parodies

Yet another waste of cyberspace. Noobs in the Thomas Community will typically take a couple of scenes from a cartoon or a Pizza Hut commercial with Ringo Starr and the Monkees and have Thomas audio in the background or vice versa. A lot of this shit is poorly edited and most use the same clips over and over again. Even the most oblivious cannot fail to see the shitty quality in a lot of these parodies... oh wait, yes they can.

Easy trolling

Like all retards on the internet, they are very docile things at first, but as soon as you say anything that is not 100% praise, they turn on you and get nasty. Some argue that they are like this because their hugboxes are either broken, or they never had them in the first place.

A typical response to receiving a one star rating or critical comment from someone that does not like their work is usually to throw a temper tantrum and get his/her fellow retards to flame the hell out of whoever was not swallowing his/her terrible work like it was chocolate.

These kids also get very stroppy if you steal their hard work or emulate it in a certain way, since they are aspies, and often claim copyright even though they are using someone else's characters/story/etc. This was evident when BLACKbusterCritic started archiving the events of the Thomas community for reference material.

Some members often see this sort of stuff coming, and put a pathetic little notice at the beginning of their videos, saying they will sue you if you steal their video/idea. It it advised that Anonymous steal the videos with these sort of warnings on them, edit and re-upload them, and watch as the little kid on the other side of the internet tries to hire an e-lawyer for his case.

A stolen video removed for copyright infringement! Oh no! Anon reuploaded one of my crappy MS Paint videos and stuck annotations all over it! Call the Internet Police!

Make your own Thomas "parody" using dialoge from an adult-oriented movie or TV show, something you like, which Thomas fans would never touch with a 10 foot pole

BRWS Competition Faggotry

One day, a YouTube Partner by the name of Simierski thought that he'd be able to weed out the 4% of the YouTube Thomas community that wasn't retarded by doing a social experiment. For this, he set the community a very simple challenge of creating an original character, that was actually somewhat original, for his model train series that no one else gives a fuck about. He would then give out prizes to the people that actually did their research on the topic of making a character that would fit into a series about steam engines in 1950's Britain. Amazingly, even the most basic of instructions were ignored, and over 90% of the entries fucked up on at least one of the requirements, if not all of them. Some even stole characters from other sources, including Thomas.

After the winners had been chosen, many of the inbred morons who made completely crap entries started crying about the whole ordeal, even going as far as to draw their creations crying. Eventually, most of the lame attempts at original characters were removed once the competition had ended.

   
“ 		 
Iv'e been working so hard & Now i lost and look how sad it is for Henning the DSB E 991.
  		„
  		 

—silverexpress1997 on why his Danish engine didn't win a contest meant for British engines

How to spot a Youtube Thomas Club Member

Expect them... to be retarded.

It is fairly easy to spot one of these lurking in a friends list or in a comments box. Here are some pointers:

  • May try to show off in comments by posting useless railway trivia.
  • May have a channel avatar that relates to or includes Thomas.
  • Has a list of friends and foes in the description box of his/her profile.
  • Has channel rules in same description box, mostly along the lines of "NO BAD COMMENTS OR I BLOCK YOU!".
  • Will most likely list Thomas and the Magic Railroad as a favourite movie even though it is shit.
  • Will be friends with loads of other YT Thomas Club fucktards.
  • Will always have at least one video of a shitty slideshow dedicated to either their favourite character out of the show or Original character bullshit.
  • Will often cry if you downvote their videos for lulz.
  • ???
  • PROFIT!

"Normal" Thomasfags VS YouTube Thomasfags

Contrary to popular belief, there is no viable difference between YouTube based Thomas fans and "Normal" fans aside from the site they reside on. The mass of "Normal" fans habitually hang out on the Sodor Island Forums, a closed off, heavily moderated shithole with no more community than a YouTube comments page a fantastic forum that only the cool fans hang out on. Each member feels the need for undying friendship for one another, despite interaction being relegated to the odd forum post. Members vary anywhere from 12 year old kiddies who should be watching Pokemon to 30-something year olds whom act as senior veteran members of the fanbase, despite churning out the exact same type of crap as their young brethren. Habitually, veteran members of the fandom will usually be the ones calling the shots - usually headhunting shitty fan collaboration projects and throwing up neurotic "theories" about Thomas. One point of lulz was a rebuttal to a troll article written by The Guardian making fun of Thomas - written by no one else than Ryan Healy, a senior-elite Thomasfag and defender of all things Thomas. The kiddies are no better than their masters, throwing up horrible fan videos and making banal comments all over YouTube. Those that don't hang out on Sodor Island Forums were usually banned, and make laughable attempts at attack videos against the forum. This is the origin of many a YouTube Thomas Club member - rejection from a shitty forum (and of course access to mommy's computer and daddy's camera). Sadly the forum elite take a stance no higher than the kiddies in such arguments, making the SIF versus YouTube conflicts more akin to a case of kiddies versus... more kiddies. In a "community" where the elite leaders are every bit as irritable and immature as the kiddies, it begs the question of such a community's quality.

   
“ 		 
The only thing I'm "grouchy" about is people like yourself going around posting your hateful shite against me and SiF, and going to the lengths you have to try and attack me - all done on the grounds that you've been denied membership. Respect? Pfft, yeah right, I'll believe it when I see it!
  		„
  		 

— Lyin' Ryan engaging in a conversation with some kiddie

When these are the kinds of videos your community leader makes, you know their group is just as fucking retarded.

A list of note-worthy members

STOP RIGHT THERE, FAGGOT!
ED does NOT need a huge list of absolute nobodies, nor does it give a shit about your petty forum feud with that bitch who doesn't agree with your Zutara OTP. Rather than spreading your butthurt vendetta over to this site, how about you read ED:101 and ED:A User's Guide to Article Building. And while you're at it, how about contributing to some actual drama you fucking idiot?

Gallery of Fail

  • blowjobs
    blowjobs
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • what Thomasfags get off to
    what Thomasfags get off to
  • what were they thinking
    what were they thinking

See also

YouTube Thomas Club is part of a series on YouTube.

Visit the YouTube Portal
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