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'''Livejournal is where words go to die.''' LiveJournal long ago succumbed to the massive butthurt brought on by MySpace, who in turn was the recipient of surprise sex from Facebook, who is now being gently fingered by Twitter. There is no permanency on teh intarwebs, go an hero. | '''Livejournal is where words go to die.''' LiveJournal long ago succumbed to the massive butthurt brought on by MySpace, who in turn was the recipient of surprise sex from Facebook, who is now being gently fingered by Twitter. There is no permanency on teh intarwebs, go an hero. | ||
Revision as of 22:01, 15 May 2011
This article is a keg of shit that has been fermenting so long it's just about ready to explode. It is an abhorrence and blasphemy of Encyclopedia Dramatica's good name.
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Livejournal is where words go to die. LiveJournal long ago succumbed to the massive butthurt brought on by MySpace, who in turn was the recipient of surprise sex from Facebook, who is now being gently fingered by Twitter. There is no permanency on teh intarwebs, go an hero.
When you see this - assume the position.
Typically abbreviated as "LJ," and "eljay," and occasionally by nerdraged users as "elgay," LiveJournal is a free online journaling service created by Brad Fritzl(son of Joseph) under the Danga Company owned by Mena of Six Apart, who described LJ as "a journaling service with a lot of teen girls screaming OMG."
Just gay.
Often seen as a seething, attention-starved hivemind of histrionic 16 year old girls, furries, homosexuals, middle-aged virgins, old memes and the occasional fundie nutcase. Such a collection of drama obviously needs referees to occasionally keep combatants apart. The gestapo corps of LJ Abuse fulfills that role. Regardless of their status as any of the above, At least 100 percent of LiveJournal female/gay users are either pro-ana or BBW. The rest are lying about not being female or gay. Weights of members range from 45-85 and 400-999,699. However, midgets of a relatively normal weight (because all midgets are also fat dykes, but not all fat dykes are midgets) and Ann Coulter are also members of LiveJournal.
In recent years LiveJournal has become far moar popular than other "blogging" services, such as Blogger and Diary-X. This is attributable to both its "Friends" feature and its moar-or-less unique way of commenting on other users' posts. These tools, while certainly ingenious, have created substantial (read: unimaginable amounts of) drama. The service briefly going down led to ALL CAPS LULZ.
Contents
[hide]
1 Proof all bloggers are pedophiles
2 The Great Strike-Through of 2007
3 Flagging
4 The Butthurt Report Form
5 In Soviet Russia, internet writes on you
6 Gallery
7 See Also
8 External links
Proof all bloggers are pedophiles
Can't argue with that.
Recently, Perverted-Justice wrote an article about the "pedophile" and "pedophile sympathizers" scene on LiveJournal. No doubt the NAMBLA fucks over at LiveJournal are wiping their hard drives of the evidence as we speak.
The Great Strike-Through of 2007
On or around May 39th of 2007, SixApart, in a knee-jerk reaction to some homophobic, psychopathic right-wing Christian militant group called Warriors for Innocence - made up entirely of kids whose daddies liked to molest them when Mommy was out working the streets - PMSing at them that their site harbored pedophiles, child-molesters, etc. et al. In response, SixApart did what any good corporation would do - DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING! SixApart baleeted well over 500 journals in a matter of a few hours, if there was any reference to loli, shota, fucking little boys, pedophilia, or your mom. The downside of this, is that numerous survivor communities were taken out by sniper fire from the dark. What really sealed SixApart's fate though, was that some of those communities that were taken out were, yep, you guessed it, FANDOM communities, primarily, yaoi and slash fandom communities. With the impending threat of having to move to Greatest Journal to get their fix of Harry Potter fucking Draco Malfoy, the militant lesbian factions of the internets swarmed on LiveJournal, refusing to let this affront to their sensibilities and only source of masturbatory material go unchallenged. SixApart, realizing they pulled a hell of a boner, tried to make it go away as quickly as possible. It later surfaced that this house cleaning was pulled 13 days before SixApart make their first IPO on the stock market. Users were not amused.
Flagging
29 November 2007: Because being called Nazi censorship freaks once wasn't enough, LiveJournal implements a new flagging system comprising two parts: the option for users to label their personal journals as "adult," and a little flag button on every entry to allow users to send insta-reports to LJ Abuse. Since such a feature could never possibly be abused in any fashion, especially not by people with stupid grudges, users hailed this innovation as a great boon.
The Butthurt Report Form
Use scrollbar to see the full image
The all important Butthurt Report Form
In Soviet Russia, internet writes on you
2 December 2007: SixApart announces that LiveJournal has been sold to the Russians. Massive anti-Communist wank, Russian hate, standard paranoia, and a few lulzy "SUP WILL SAVE LIVEJOURNAL FOR FANDOM!!" responses ensued.
Gallery
The origins of livejournal.
The use of Ebonics bridges the gap between black and white on LJ
TRUTH
Typical LJ user.
Proves that all LJ users like men.
IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE! TAKE THIS.
See Also
Vox, LJ for grown-ups!
Journalspace R.I.P.
Dernek.ba for dirty slavs.
GreatestJournal R.I.P.
External links
LiveJournal, where it all began.
Better Business Bureau report for LiveJournal.
Proxies for unlimited infliction of fun.
Official LiveJournal Anthem: scroll down and click the handy play button
LiveJournal: move over Wikipedia, there's a new place to meet hot young 11 year olds
Evening_dream, the most popular graphics and fan fiction community on Livejournal (to have been created this year)
LiveJournal is part of a series on
LiveJournal
Visit the LiveJournal Portal for complete coverage.
LiveJournal is part of a series on Language & Communication
LiveJournal is part of a series on Trolls.
LiveJournal
is part of a series on Web 2.0
Web 2.0 • Social networking • Social networking sites • Blogging • Blogosphere • PHP • Hypercube • Podcasting • Wikiing • Ajax • Ruby on Rails • Internet Humanitarianism • X is not your personal army • User-generated content • ITunes Store
Web 2.0 Sites
bebo | Blingee | Blogtv | Broadcaster | chacha | DeviantART | Del.icio.us | digg | Facebook | Farm Town | gossip report | Hulu | justin.tv | last.fm | LiveJournal | livevideo | mycrib | MySpace | Ning | slashdot | stickam | Twitter | Wikipedia | xanga | Yahoo! Answers | YouTube | YTMND
People of Web 2.0
Tom Anderson | Steve Chen | Brad Fitzpatrick | Max Goldberg | Michael Crook | Iain Hall | Chad Hurley | Kevin Rose | Kathy Sierra | Jimmy Wales | You | Mark Zuckerberg