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Avril Lavigne: Difference between revisions
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Being punk is, at it’s core, being yourself and not being ashamed of who you are, regardless if society says it’s acceptable or not. Yet Avril constantly contradicts herself, and is so ashamed of who she is, a pop singer, she has convinced herself otherwise and is intent on trying to convince others as well. Frankly, if you have to say you're tough and hardcore, you're not. | Being punk is, at it’s core, being yourself and not being ashamed of who you are, regardless if society says it’s acceptable or not. Yet Avril constantly contradicts herself, and is so ashamed of who she is, a pop singer, she has convinced herself otherwise and is intent on trying to convince others as well. Frankly, if you have to say you're tough and hardcore, you're not. | ||
{{quote|I'm convinced we could solve the world energy needs if we could somehow manage to harness the energy of Joey Ramone and Sid Vicious turning in their graves every time some one used Avril Lavigne and Punk together in a sentence.|JSP}} | |||
==Fake Image: She's Retarded== | ==Fake Image: She's Retarded== | ||
Revision as of 18:07, 21 February 2012
Avril Lavigne is a 15 year old rebellious punk who is talentless and fuckable just like all good female singers. Her image is of a rebellious teenager, but she doesn’t really cause any problems other than what she does for videos. She can’t really play a guitar or skateboard, and all those songs she “wrote” at sixteen are actually coauthored by others. She doesn’t know who the Sex Pistols are, because whatever happened before her birth was irrelevant, yet she fancies herself as a modern day Sid Vicious.
Her lyrics are thought provoking, and the songs themselves have a very pop sound because…they ARE pop. No matter how much she wants to kick and scream that it’s not, it is. She’s got a fashion line full of things that are already popular in the mainstream (ex. Short shorts, foil graphic tees, skinny jeans, oversized graphic hoodies) but with slight differences (Her clothing started out at the ever glam Kohl's but you can find it at Ross now for dirt cheap).
If you've never been subjected to her music and are thinking of looking some of it up now on YouTube, you do so at your own risk.
2 Girls 1 Cup was never this shitty.
Learning to Play Guitar and Skate
Avril Lavigne has a completely fake manufactured image designed to sell records and mainstream styles (in pink and black of course) to tween whores shopping at Hot Topic.
In an issue of J-14, Avril said "Once I sit down with the guitar, I write about what I'm feeling that day." In Time magazine she said, "I sit down with a guitar player usually.” So does SHE play the guitar or not? Album credits list her as playing guitar for ONE song.
In the same J-14 article, she claims that "I wrote all those songs when I was sixteen." However, credits show her as a cowriter along with a multitude of professional song writers. Her image is of an independent, female guitar playing songwriting skateboarding singing prodigy, when that’s simply NOT the case.
She skateboards in her videos, poses with her skateboard for publicity shots, and told YM magazine that she’s a good skateboarder. In an MTV interview, she talked about how the director of “Complicated” asked her to skate in the video, but didn’t because said “No, dude, I suck!” That sounds a great deal like her guitar shenanigans – posing with it, playing a few chords, claiming to be good at it, but when it all comes down to it she really can’t.
Fake Image: Bitchy Hypocrite & Retarded Lyrics
—Avril lavigne, moments before spitting on paparazzi, yelling fuck you at them and fans alike, and signing fan’s merchandise with “fuck you” | ||
— Avril Lavigne | ||
It sounds like she rejected them because she thought she was showing off too much…in which case, why did she pose like that in the first place?
“Image is a personal choice. I'd rather be seen as me than for not wearing anything. When I first started out in music I was 17. I didn't want to wear the clothes that everyone wanted me to wear. I wore my tank top and Doc Martens boots and I'm glad I did because I was so different from everyone else.” Now she wears her fashion label “Abbey Dawn” which she mass markets as unique even though it looks exactly like what’s in fashion right now, just in a different pattern, glittery skulls with hearts and bows, zebra print, and lots of pink, purple, and black. She also wears Chanel, which is totally ALT3RNAT1VE!!!111
“Nobody tells me what to wear. Trust me. I'm a girl and I'm growing up. I wrote my first album when I was a 16-year-old skater who wore size 32 pants and hoodies. I was a tomboy. I had an older brother I looked up to, and I hung out with mostly guys. Now I'm into skirts. I'm growing up, I'm changing, I'm becoming a woman. That happens to girls - they become women.” I understand that your style has changed, but are you saying that females that dress more masculine aren’t “women” and haven’t grown up? Also, you were a skater? Really? See above.
— Avril Lavigne | ||
First of all, she can't even play guitar. Second, why did she do a show wearing a Hooters outfit? She also subsequently got a noticeable breast augmentation, and wore outfits that showed it off.
Now about what she has to say in those deep lyrics…
“You’re trying to be cool, you look like a fool to me” (Complicated) The song that made her famous is about a person that changes their looks and personality to impress others. In the video, Avril and co. are trashing a mall and causing all sorts of teenage mayhem. She smashes her guitar in the end of the video, presumably symbolic of what she has done to modern music. She has the image of a “rebellious” skater teenager with an attitude. Yet the song is about someone who’s doing the same thing.
“I never spend less than an hour, washin’ my hair in the shower, it always takes five hours to make it straight. So I’ll braid it a zillion braids though it may take a friggin’ day, there’s nothin’ else better to do anyway” (My World). Oh, what a small shallow world it must be…
Avril’s also said, "I don't write 'Oh-baby-baby' songs. I'm a skater punk who writes guitar driven rock." Allow me to cite her song, “Things I’ll Never Say”:
I'm feeling nervous Trying to be so perfect Cause I know you're worth it You're worth it Yeah La da da da La da da da
Fake Image: Wannabe Punk Poseur
— Avril Lavigne | ||
Yes, it’s old but it’s part of the origins of punk. Should really learn about history.
— Avril Lavigne | ||
If you don’t know about the Sex Pistols, what the hell do you know about Sid Vicious – the bassist of the Sex Pistols? Punk has been around much longer than she has, despite the fact that she’s apparently not willing to acknowledge the existence of anything that occurred before she was born. She’s nowhere near as counter-cultural as punk was when it started, and acts NOTHING like Sid Vicious. Though hopefully she’ll OD on heroin soon (though more likely Oxycontin and Xanax cuz she's a pussy).
— Avril Lavigne | ||
I thought you were quoted as saying you CREATED punk for “this day and age”, and also claimed to "sing punk"? Plus you have the word “PUNK” written on several of the items from your own fashion line.
"When it is suggested that even then her tastes were kind of pop-oriented, her head snaps up as though she's been slapped. 'New country,' she says, as though pop music is somehow less cool than new country. Then again, it seems any music is better than pop music in Lavigne's eyes. Later, when it is mentioned that she seems poised for pop stardom, she is quick to correct. 'No, no, no. Rock stardom,' she says forcefully. 'I don't like using the term pop star because that's not my personality. My personality is like a rock star. I'm hardcore.'" (Taken from Nationalpost.com.) She sings pop music (I’d say she writes it, but her coauthors might take offense), but insists on labeling herself as something other than what she is, because obviously, she hates herself and delusions make her feel better.
Being punk is, at it’s core, being yourself and not being ashamed of who you are, regardless if society says it’s acceptable or not. Yet Avril constantly contradicts herself, and is so ashamed of who she is, a pop singer, she has convinced herself otherwise and is intent on trying to convince others as well. Frankly, if you have to say you're tough and hardcore, you're not.
—JSP | ||
Fake Image: She's Retarded
“Fans at Avril Lavigne's Canadian homecoming were left stunned after the singer displayed an embarrassing lack of geographical knowledge. Lavigne, 23, shocked concertgoers at her Montreal show by incorrectly stating what province she was in. "I love you Montreal, I'm so happy to be back home...in Ontario, Canada," Lavigne said to the crowd. Montreal is actually a city in Quebec." (Ninemsn). This seems like a good time to remind everyone that she is FROM Canada.
—Avril Lavigne | ||
If she’s so comfortable with herself, then why does she constantly try to convince people she’s a “rock star” when she’s a pop star. If she was actually comfortable with herself, she'd accept that and move on. This reminds me of something a notoriously filthy, self-righteous, self-centered, bitchy slut once said: "I'm smart, and anyone who thinks I'm not is stupid." Great logic.
— Avril Lavigne | ||
Did I mention she dropped out of school?
Avril Lavigne has a star tattoo on her wrist, which she got at the same time her friend and associate Ben Moody got an identical one. She also has a heart with the letter "D" in it, in honor of her (then) husband. Her tiny badly placed tattoos are VERY hardcore.
"Someone like Kelly Clarkson is beautiful and has a pretty voice, but with me you get a much stronger image. I'm tough, I have a look that girls want to copy, and I sound a particular way. It's good if you're not easily ignored. And I'm not." Actually, with Avril, you get an image of a wannabe-rebel/punk who constantly contradicts herself. Not to mention she says she has a rock/punk sound when she doesn't. At least Kelly Clarkson knows who the fuck she is.
Typical Skanky Hollywood Socialite
She's been photographed on vacation without her husband, flirting with other men, getting drunk and partying, but namely hanging around Brandon Davis. He's an oil heir that's dated both Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton (which Avril has been photographed hanging out with). She’s divorcing her husband, Deryck Whibley (singer of Sum 41) and plans on moving in with Brandon Davis (who has never lived with a woman before, as he's never reached that level of commitment. Guess she wants to clean up Lohan's and Hilton's left overs).
She uses her false status as a "rebel" as an excuse to be a bitch, parties and flirts just like any other Hollywood socialite, and has been safely packaged as a plastic image of what it means to be “punk” for the masses, complete with shallow music, a fashion line with nothing original, and a perfume.
The Avril Troll
The Avril "Troll" was a prolific Wikipedia vandal, active 2003-2008. Not until 2007, however, did the vandalism escalate, leading to a spate of treads on the administrator's noticeboard. Many Wikipedos suspected Grawp-like activity, but they as usual were wrong, as it's not his modus operandi.
The Avril Trolls' goal in life was to to punish Wikipedia for its under-representation of Avril Lavigne, which is further evidence that Avril Lavigne fans are fucking retarded. Avril started out on the Reference Desk, flooding the desks with inane questions about Avril Lavigne, her music, hair styles, hat size, height, diet, shoe size, and anything else vaguely relating to Avril Lavigne. Populated entirely by no-life grammar nazis and officious admin wannabes, the Reference Desk talk page quickly generated enough discussion on Avril and how to deal with her to fill several books. Editing from a massive public ip range, Wikipedia admins found it virtually impossible to block or stop Avril. Instead, the Reference Desk tried WP:DENY Avril to little effect.
Outside the reference desk, Avril mostly vandalized high use templates to spread "happy birthday Avril" messages across Wikipedia. Other notable events included exploiting a new subpage moving feature to pagemove thousands of Wikipedia admins' userpages and all related talk page archives at once [1] [2] eventually resulting in developers disabling the feature for non-admins.
This led to some ED users changing the Avril Lavigne page from a redirect to "16-year-old girl" into something of an article, with many disparaging references towards Avril Lavigne. Since the Avril troll shows no mercy and forgiveness to those who dis Avril Lavigne, she became an enemy of Encyclopedia Dramatica, and was very offended at the slightest thing said against Avril Lavigne. This was particularly lulzworthy as it caused the Avril Lavigne troll to come out with death threats and other threats of violence against ED and its users;
Since the citizens of ED do not take well to being told what to do by some butthurt faggot with an obsession over a female pop singer, they decided to hurl insults at Avril Lavigne.
Since then nothing else happened, and in late 2008 the Avril Troll finally died. With the introduction of the edit filter over at Wikipedia most large scale vandals have admitted defeat, instead focusing back on the good old art of trolling which the edit filter is powerless against
Avril Lavigne is a fucking alcoholic
Avril Lavigne is a fucking alcoholic. The bitch can drink more booze than your typical Russian, since she is your typical Canadian, after all. Avril Lavigne likes to get drunk and enjoy life.
—cunt | ||
Her most popular song ever.
Quotes and memorable events
- Epic Reference Desk Trolling - the first and so far best disruptor of the Reference Desk
- Wikipedians shit their pants - the page move extravaganza
- Wikitravel - so easy to vandalize it's just not fun
Previous Quote | Next Quote | |||||
Gallery
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The Trolling -
Avril Troll strikes where you least expect it -
Vandalism has never been so easy -
can often be seen stroking self via ED page
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COLLATERAL DAMAGE ROCKS MY SOCKS!! -
Lol crap flood -
What took 30 seconds to do wastes hours of Wikipedos time in cleanup -
Uh oh! -
Not even Wikiquote is safe! -
Another Wiki falls victim -
The end?
See Also
 Avril Lavigne is part of a series on articles which are the subject of retarded edit wars |
Beware all ye who tread here Atheist • Ape • AQ Worlds • Black Jesus • Christian • Chimp • |
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Avril Lavigne is part of a series on Visit the Wikipedia Portal for complete coverage. |
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Avril Lavigne is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
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Avril Lavigne is part of a series on Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage. |