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Kung Fu: Difference between revisions
imported>Negrophile Removed link to flushed article Samadhi Gung Fu |
imported>Segagod |
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[[Image:Kung_fu_cat.jpg|thumb|[[Dynamic Entry]]]] | [[Image:Kung_fu_cat.jpg|thumb|[[Dynamic Entry]]]] | ||
[[Image:Jonestard.gif|thumb|Fist of Tinfoil.]] | [[Image:Jonestard.gif|thumb|Fist of Tinfoil.]] | ||
==Kung Fu Styles== | [http://www.example.com link title]==Kung Fu Styles== | ||
There are many styles of Kung Fu, most of which were [[furry|ripped off from animals]]. Being the sick, demented fucks they are, [[furfags]] often claim that because kung fu masters practiced animal forms, they are also furries in the "spiritual" sense. | There are many styles of Kung Fu, most of which were [[furry|ripped off from animals]]. Being the sick, demented fucks they are, [[furfags]] often claim that because kung fu masters practiced animal forms, they are also furries in the "spiritual" sense. | ||
*[[Gook|Wu Shu]] | *[[Gook|Wu Shu]] | ||
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*[[Mudkips|Formation of the Eight Mudkips]] | *[[Mudkips|Formation of the Eight Mudkips]] | ||
*[[ChosonNinja|Choson Karate DTG]] | *[[ChosonNinja|Choson Karate DTG]] | ||
*[[Pound Puppies|Shun Doggy Satzu]] | |||
==Famous Kung Fu Practitioners== | ==Famous Kung Fu Practitioners== | ||
Revision as of 02:58, 17 October 2012
Kung Fu is a fucking badass method of self defense invented by the azns to keep foreign countries from invading for their rice. Kung Fu is inherited genetically and cannot be mastered by any other race, aside from the occasional black person. IRL Kung Fu has never worked. Ever. This is due to bullets having the ability to go through skin, and the contrary being impossible. Anime Kung Fu wouldn't work either if more people carried guns and weren't fucktarded enough to fight more experienced azns unarmed.
link title==Kung Fu Styles== There are many styles of Kung Fu, most of which were ripped off from animals. Being the sick, demented fucks they are, furfags often claim that because kung fu masters practiced animal forms, they are also furries in the "spiritual" sense.
- Wu Shu
- Dragon
- Tiger
- Crane
- Nigger
- Leopard
- Iron Penis
- Snake
- Articuno
- Wing Chun
- Jeet Kune Do
- Ba ji quan
- Formation of the Eight Mudkips
- Choson Karate DTG
- Shun Doggy Satzu
Famous Kung Fu Practitioners
Kung Fu is so useless that anyone who masters it only achieves fame through movies and acting, as it poses absolutely no threat in IRL combat.
- Bruce Lee (dead)
- Brandon Lee (dead)
- Chuck Norris (Giant Assdouche)
- Jet Li (exists to make white people complain in their hugbox)
- Ryu (not real)
- Goku (not real)
- Liu Kang (not real)
- black person (some)
- Keanu Reeves (fraud)
- David Carradine (dead)
- Jackie Chan (how can this list NOT have Jackie Chan? Drunken Fists yo)
Sample Kung Fu
Video of Kung Fu and its many practical uses.
Kung Fu, The Series
In the 70's there was a popular television show called Kung Fu. The main star was David Carradine, a white man without one asian drop of blood in his entire body. The show was originally written by Bruce Lee but the producers said he was too chinky to be on TV and decided to pull an Eric Bauman by taking his notes and cast some random drunk guy, who happens to be David Carradine, and cast him as a half-asian that knows Kung Fu, despite the fact that Carradine can't even fight for shit to save himself from 5 year olds; in his favor, he recently took a good, hard, look at himself and acted accordingly.
YouTube Kung Fu Masters
These are a different breed of Martial artist altogether. They use their webcams to show off the latest moves and skillz they learned from watching other much more skilled people. Without a doubt expertly executing the moves and yelling like an idiot at the same time. ED needs moar articles on these champions so get to it faggot!