Opie and Anthony: Difference between revisions

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R.I.P. PATRICE O'NEAL

Also known as "America's most trusted name in news" according to Stephen Colbert, Opie & Anthony are a pair of famous radio trolls who gained quite a reputation at least 100 years ago by fucking up big time and years later fucked up again, all because they let some homeless black person on their show who proceeded to say he wanted to raep Condi Rice and Laura Bush. Last Thursday, the moar lulzworthy half got fired for being too funny on twitter after an altercation with a wild northeastern american chimpanzee.

Biography

In case you haven't noticed already, O&A are notorious for risking a permaban from radio just to get more listeners.

The show is hosted by Gregory "Opie" Hughes (the epically unfunny one who plays dumb and fails. He is the male equivalent of Robin Quivers but with manboobs.) and, until recently, his cohost Anthony Cumia (the semi-angry conservative/libertarian one who occasionally likes to rant about politics). Opie is roughly a teenage boy in a man's body. Ant used to do most of the show's commentary and voicework, despite having mild verbal dyslexia. He also often pretended to be/exaggerated being a racist and anti-semite just to troll black persons and Jews for the lulz. An occasional lolcow, he was known for his love of guns, beer and jailbait, as well as his haet for Obama and liberals. He is also no fan of House and has a thing for women less than half his age. He can still be heard on his podcast.

Their primary audience consists of whores, adolescents and basement dwellers. Many are fucktards who can't contribute to the show humorwise. A few others are butthurt attention whores who listen to the show just to call in and complain about how offensive it is to them, failing to recognize the fact that they took time out of their day just to get on the show they hate in the first place.

Before O&A were even together, Howard Stern used to "rule the airwaves". Despite their mediocre past, they eventually managed to pwn the Jew by moving to Satellite radio before he did. Stern then got a couple hundred million dollars, and Opie and Anthony admitted fail. To this very day, Jewboy still hates their faggot guts, cursing them with former buttboy Tim Sabean.

OTI

	“	Damn, you just been pwned!	„
	—Master Po

Opie and Anthony's passion for faggotry also extends to the internet, as any visit to their biggest fansite, Wackbag will tell you. There, their unfunny fans spend hours posting lame jokes in a futile attempt to outdo each other in hopes that they will get noticed by their heros and somehow have meaning brought to their basement-dwelling lives.

On their show though, they deserve credit for consistently plugging The Power 5 and trying to encourage the five people that haven't yet to go to meatspin, lemonparty and tubgirl. They are responsible for introducing 2Girls1Cup to people who wouldn't normally watch whores eating shit, as well as Tay Zonday's rise to fame and memedom. They also enjoy google-bombing in their spare time. 1man1jar has just recently been added to their repertoire of fun-to-watch video discoveries.

THEY'VE GOT NORTON!

Along with at least 100 other shit comedians, the third mic of the show is the homoerotic plugwhore himself, James Norton, aka "Lil' Jimmy", a self-proclaimed creep who is quite fond of the "older gentleman", as he likes to put it. He does several characters for the lulz, such as Steve from Yellowstone, who insults bad callers (which, for some bizarre reason, he doesn't do as often anymore), Ted Sheckler, who is a complete tool that owns many an emporium, Lyle Delmar Chipperson, A.K.A. "Chip", an enormous troll who makes unfunny jokes/remarks on purpose, and Helen Bergeron, a stereotypical senile old gossipy jew hen. Sit-ins for him include Louis CK (whose show he occasionally guest stars in), Bob Kelly (more frequent guest on Louie's show, as well as Dane Cook's secret portly butt partner), fellow "Last Comic Standing" contestant Rich Vos (O&A's own Karl Pilkington), and Chappelle Show's Bill Burr.

He has been known to weasel his way into getting an autograph from any big-name celebrity, even if he smashed them on the show verbally or in writing earlier. He's also been known to get ahead of himself in his rage, but that's because he's aware of assholes (not just his own).

Here, Lil' Jimmy explains the meaning behind the term, "Monster Rain", an old meme popular among O&A fanboys, found on his rarely-touched Myspace blog:

“	Recently I told the story of Monster Rain on the air and it’s been sweeping the nation ever since. I decided to post since many people now write me to ask what Monster Rain is. When I was in 1st or 2nd grade my friend and I would play this fun little game. We would be bored, walking around our apartment complex and one of us would yell, ”Monster Rain!” and we would both scamper under the porch to avoid being hit by it. While we were under the porch avoiding Monster Rain, we would kill time by telling stories and blowing each other. I am not sure what the tie in was between oral sex and the Monster Rain; hindsight dictates that an umbrella would have been more practical. I am also beginning to doubt that there was any real Monster Rain at all; I now suspect we were using this fictional occurrence just to get under the porch and kiss each other’s dingles. I don’t even remember the kid’s name to be honest, nor do I remember what he looked like. I do, however, remember one time he was wearing Budweiser swim trunks that smelled like moth balls. Just in case you have moments where you think your life sucks, at least you don’t have to contend with the memory of kneeling under a porch and performing oral treats on someone whose balls smelled like your grandmother’s closet.	„

Norton has recently stated that he also looks forward to playing this game with his idol, Ozzy Osbourne. He also has stated that he wants to date tubgirl, and his character Uncle Paul has been seen going out raeping with Brian Peppers and Pedobear. So far, he's taken a page out of Chris-chan's book by eating his own semen.

He is also an accomplished author with two New York Times best-sellers, one autobiography and one collection of cebritard-bashing, and is a favorite guest on Fox News' "Red Eye" with Greg Gutfeld. [1] [2] [3] [4] It is argued that he often associates with Jay Leno to compensate for his own lack of a chin.

Some argue he should receive the ED Seal of Approval for calling out Jesse Ventura and the truthfags on their faggotry. Unfortunately, he's not funny enough nor famous enough with the internets for this medal of honor.

HEY THERE!
Hey, Jim Norton! I saw what you did with Truthfag
I just wanted to say keep up the good work

Show Characters

Pat from Moonachie

Fat, bald piece of trailer trash with diabeetus who sounds like John Candy/Peter Griffin. Likes to drink Egg Nog and then subsequently regurgitate it into other's mouths.

Stalker Patti

Mangy, unfunny old hag and slutty virgin who smells of bad coffee.

Andrew aka "Big A"

Large, possibly retarded st-...st-...st-...uttering man, and possible serial killer. He and Twitchels used to spawn lulz when they did the "News of the World" bit.

Sandy Kane

Decrepit, talentless Jewish whore who sounds like a drunk Fran Drescher. Used to play awful, raunchy, unfunny songs on her guitar, but got butthurt and wound up leaving the show after (unsuccessfully) suing O&A.

Tippy Tom

Dead, filthy, homeless faggot. Goodnight sweet prince.

Louis "Twitchels" Centanni

Suffers from Tourettes and used to be a regular on O&A.

Half-a-Hulk Face

Another former regular of the show who suffers from "Elephant Man's disease" and slurred speech.

O&A Staff

And, lastly, what would the O&A show be without the various characters hard at work behind it all? Here's a taste of some of those people:

"If you see me comin', best get outta moi way!"

Steve Carlesi aka "Steve C"/ "Steve the Bear"

Swishy Lebanese executive producer and former leader of the shitty band Foundry, known for their lyrically brilliant smash hit "Pendulum". He ran the clusterfuck of a website by the same name, which houses the show's official website that noone uses anymore.

The site consists mainly of links to every show of the week, show-related/topical videos, pr0n videos for users to fap to, concert footage/music videos and shitty IRL accident/police videos, all captioned with Steve's excellent grammar skills and watermarked with the official Foundry logo (which is large, opaque, and blocks half the screen). Unfortunately, he had completely ceased posting rundowns, due to his immense levels of incompetence, fail and faggotry.

He was also fully responsible for accidentally setting up O&A's interview with the Corey Worthington impostor, and was rightly beheaded for the fuck-up. His position was formally terminated last Thursday, with little reason given, followed by his recent sudden passing.

Eric Nagle aka "Erock"/"Sexbagel"

Co-producer and fat fucktard. Brings nothing to the table, yet consumes everything from it. Loves the "Garlic Butter Saw".

"Primetime" Sam Roberts

Associate producer and white nigra (not to be confused with wigger). Also known as the "Albino Aborigine". He fetches show-related videos for the official site and eats mcnuggets like the negro child he is. Big wrestling fanboy, especially of John Cena.

Club Soda Kenny

Former cop and part-time comic, he is now one of the show's bodyguards and a hulking retard.

Master Po

The show's other security guard. Not as stupid or clumsy as CSK, but much more of a douchebag; plus, he knows Kung-Fu. Now replaced by "Master Joe".

David "the Intern" Fried

A young asspie Jew recently hired as an intern. Host of the "David & Bobo Show". No longer part of the program.

Daniel Curlan, aka "Bobo"

The other host of the now-defunct "David & Bobo Show", Bobo is a quarter-retard who had 46 dick surgeries due to a birth defect known as hypospadias (which also is the reason his penis is a girthy two inches). He also sounds like a cross between Jimmy Valmer from South Park and Chris Griffin from Family Guy. He has plans to take his coworker, Christina, to the Queens Motor Inn where he will go "pussy-diving". Never missing a chance to be homoerotic, the crew once had him take off his pants, where they'd watch him get an erection when they talked about Christina, and go down when they talked about baseball. Haters and fucktards complain when he comes on, but Louis_CK has called the Up and Down game one of the funniest things he'd ever heard, so they can shut the fuck up.

LINGERRR LONGERRR!!!

O&A, in order to get away with moar shit on their radio show, once claimed that they were actually cartoon characters
"So, E-Rock; how important is the Garlique® Butter Sauce?"
FRRRRUNKIS!!!
I move away from the mic to blow cock
DO IT FAGGOT
Jimmy does not approve of this faggotry

Also see:

External Link

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Opie and Anthony: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 12:05, 23 May 2015

Contents

Biography

OTI

THEY'VE GOT NORTON!