Nyoko

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Oh yeah. I'd hit it!

Nyoko, who goes by ladynyoko on Livejournal, is an 18 year old retarded weeaboo furry faggot with assburgers who is into roleplaying and dog-fucking. She has gained notoriety by contacting people she barely knows over AIM and asking for furry sex roleplay. These requests are, without fail, met with horror and disbelief.

Sexuality

	“	EWW BOOBS	„
	—Nyoko on boobs

eww. boobs.

Nyoko has a girlfriend. She will be sure to remind you of this at every available moment, particularly when you're supposed to be commenting to her ridiculous characters on Livejournal, because omg you guys, she ttly has a girlfriend. Like, a real one. That is her girlfriend. Whom she is dating. No lie.

Of course, this is disregarding her previously stated overblown hatred of all things sapphic. Despite freaking the fuck out when lesbianism was mentioned in a chat she was in and immediately leaving in a shitstorm, Nyoko is now a clit connoisseur. She proudly displays this fact within the numerous colorbars in her Livejournal profile.

Roleplay drama

Everyone loves random sex RP

Being a narutard, Nyoko likes to play characters from the animu series Naruto. Her favorite is Minato, Naruto's father. Because Minato is a father and Nyoko is a rabid yaoi fangirl, she has to come up with scenarios to make Minato believably gay.

One of her most infamous instances attempting this was possibly the most fucktarded thing it is possible to do. Another character called Minato a cocksucker, and she took the opening to say that Minato had actually never thought about being gay, despite being 30 years old and a ninja who probably showered with other men all the time. To declare his newly found bicuriousity, she made a post basically asking for a male sex partner for him so he could "try it out" and "see if he liked it". The majority of the community responded in horror and disgust, but unfortunately, Edward Elric, 18 years old, responded positively, leading to the most awkward May/December relationship ever.

She applies to several roleplays as the same character, proceeds to freak out as many players as possible with her kinks, and only bothers leaving a roleplay once she's worn out her welcome mat so much that there's nothing left of it - often in a flurry of shit hitting the fan, throwing as many insults as she can muster at other players, and the excuse I'm mentally ill, leave me alone!

Horror stories

Real situations experienced by real people. Feel free to add your own.

• Asking a stranger out of the blue for sex as Xemnas and Saix from Kingdom Hearts... as lions.
• Expressing interest in fucking a dog in a chat on AIM.
• Expressing interest in inappropriately touching/talking to/having sex with other people's roleplay characters (such as Mewtwo from Pokémon).
• Asking someone playing a 15 year old boy if Minato could teach him about sex, then telling the player that her character needed a "good, strong vibrator" and should get one straight away.
• Professing her love for a fictional character during a fourth wall event, linking them to her prom photo, and then describing in detail to the mun all the nasty things she'd like to do to said character via IM. SEE IT HERE

Nyoko facts

These come straight from her Livejournal profile:

• I commonly use Japanese phrases from day to day, and my family and friends understand these phrases
• I am a firm believer, supporter, and practitioner of polyamory
• I LOVE drawing, even though I'm not that good at it
• I can memorize most songs in a day
• I was officially the first person to buy Kingdom Hearts II in my area
• 6 days, 50+ hours of gameplay, and chronic carpal tunnel later, I beat Kingdom Hearts II

Discussions of fail

A long, in-depth discussion of the failure can be found in a roleplaysecrets thread here. Screencaps of moar lulz below. More to come! ADD YOUR OWN.

• Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 1
  Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 1
• Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 2
  Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 2
• Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 3
  Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 3
• Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 4
  Discussion of Nyoko's fail at the rp_anon_meme, part 4

See also

• Livejournal Roleplay
• Stormy
• Iris

Links

• ladynyoko
• flash-minato Her gay Minato.
• LadyNyoko Some fine examples of her amazing work.
• Her Gaia profile.
• Her shitty website. None of the links work. Hence shitty.

Nyoko is part of a series on LiveJournal Visit the LiveJournal Portal for complete coverage.