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[[Image:Birdemic 2893.jpg|thumb|Just from the poster you can tell it's a masterpiece.]]

{{spoilers|text=THE TWO SOCIAL FUCKTARDS GET TOGETHER AND THEN BIRDS ATTACK!!!!!one!!!}}

'''Birdemic: Shock and Terror''', a romantic thriller made in 2008 by [[Faggot|visionary director James Nguyen]], is [[False|widely considered]] to be <s>the best film that's ever been made ever</s> [[shit]]. In fact it's so shit that watching it feels like [[Buttsex|being fucked up the ass]] with a wooden dildo (except with less splinters) and by the time you're fifteen minutes in [[Gay|you wish]] that you ''were'' being fucked by the dildo because it would at least distract from the [[crap|seemingly-endless waves of excrement being wafted at you by Nguyen]].

Like many other crappy films (Citizen Kane, The Godfather, The Room - that kind of thing) ''Boredemic'' has reached an almost cult status online because [[the internet]] is fucking [[stupid]]. Screenings, reviews, commentaries and reaction videos (among other [[faggotry]]) all perpetuate the rumor that awful films can be worthwhile if they provide some [[basement dwellers]] with [[lulz|mild amusement]]. But that's bollocks.

Shitty, unfunny memes have arisen due to this film, although being shitty they're not liked or enjoyed by anyone other than the Redditfags that no doubt produce them. Being entirely made up of [[bestiality|animal fuckers]], the citizens of [[4chan|FlorFlan]] often post about it, even livestream it, on the [[lie|most popular board ever]] ([[tv/|/tv/]]) and that just gives the general public more reason to hate it.

Thankfully, although it doesn't make up for the pain this horror causes me, ''Birdemic: Shit and Error'' is a source of [[lol|humor]] and [[forced meme|quoting]] it to your [[Alone|friends]] endlessly in the [[underage b&|playground during recess]] [[Kill_Yourself|is guaranteed to produce lulz]] (not really you [[newfag|fucktarded 13 year old]]).

[[Image:Thunderbirds.jpg‎|thumb|The only film about birds that's worse.]]

==Plot Summary==
===The Love Story===
''Turdemic'' is the tale of an extremely dull yet somehow [[Lie|irresistibly attractive]] dickface called '''Rod''' who manages to seduce (and eventually [[Win|score with]]) a [[Camwhore|model]], '''Nathalie'''. Either Nathalie is a closet [[trap]] or has incredibly low standards because [[stalker|Rob's]] seduction methods of stalking and being excessively boring seem to work on her. Or it could be because he's rich. Either way, the fact that the fucking tiresome cunt [[stalker|Rod]] managed to sex with dat fine babe is a constant source of my anger and, my therapist says, the reason that I now only get sexual gratification from kidnapping, rape, murder and [[furfag|other gay fetishes]].

Roy makes a lot of money by doing whatever shit he does (business?) and is pals with a stupid cocksucker called Rick who's got a brain so small it could probably fit down [[you|your]] urethra (though it'd look like one of those videos where a snake swallows a dog or [[whatever]]). They have a really strong friendship and this friendship is expertly communicated during the film via shitty, awkward dialogue. Another one of the characters I hate in this film, Rick's mere presence on screen fills me with an overpowering desire to [[Amanda Todd|cut myself and never stop]].

Rod and Nathalie's steamy [[Prostitution|relationship]] is kicked up a notch ([[No|Is this true love?]]) and Rod even meets Nathalie's [[Sherrod|whale-shaped]] mother. Nathalie's mother, who [[gross|jerks off]] to the idea of her [[wincest|daughter]] becoming a real estate agent, is impressed by Roy's <s>charm</s> money and quickly takes a shine to the tedious shit.

The two lovebirds clearly have a deep connection, demonstrated superbly by the lack of any chemistry between the characters. Finally Rob and Nathalie seal the deal and, after a lengthy dance sequence in a deserted restaurant, fuck hard. The actual sex scene is mostly taken up with shots of their [[feet]], but I assume they fucked hard.

But this [[gay|beautiful moment]] was not to last, for out in the [[cum|star-sprayed]] night of the city something [[lulzy|terrifying]] was about to occur.

===ATTACK!!!!1 HORRER!!!!two!!!!===
[[Image:Fuck_you_birds.png|thumb|Even Spiderman hates the fucking birds.]]
Birds! [[Over 9,000|Over 8,000]] birds! (did i get le awesum [[meme]] right?)

Shit-tons of birds (and, consequently, shit-tons of bird shit) begin to rain on the city in the early hours of the morning. These birds [[WTF|spit acid and do other crazy shit]]. In order to escape them, Rod and Nathalie join forces with an ex-marine, Ramsey, (and his [[ugly|qt gf]] Becky) and arm themselves with <s>weapons</s> coathangers. On the road, the [[cool|gang]] pick up two young children who they <s>kidnap</s> rescue and <s>repeatedly molest</s> care for dearly. These kids <s>are really worthwhile, important elements of the plot</s> are entirely pointless. The children are a drain on the gang's supplies and are generally wastes of fucking space. I hate kids.

The lovers and their [[newfriend|new friends]] stop of at the beach (for [[fresh prince|relaxing all cool]]) and they meet a [[bestiality|bird scientist]], Dr. Jones, who immediately launches into a lengthy-fucking-rant about shit nobody cares about - the environment and other communist lies. Later Becky, Ramsey's gf, is attacked by the birds mid-[[shit|dump]] and, shit hanging out her ass like a [[crap|brown tongue]] performing reverse anilingus, dies in a [[gay|heart-wrenching]] yet [[gross|vomit-inducing]] farewell. Crushed by this the battle between Ramsey and the birds gets personal. With [[stupidity|bravery]] that would rival [[Sonichu]], the dipshit battled the birds for the lives of some nearby [[newfags|idiotic civilians]], eventually dying himself after being sprayed in acidic birdshit. It was sooooo sad.

Rod, Nat and the two gay kids run into a wig-wearing [[Julian Assange]] lookalike in the middle of a forest. After he explains more <s>interesting facts about the harmful affect of humans on the environment</s> boring, time-wasting crap, Roy leads Nat and the two kids away (probably in order to find a bush that they can use for cover while they do some more molesting). However, more [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|drama]] was about to occur. The forest, being made of wood, caught fire because of <s>the sun</s> <s>the environment</s> something, it doesn't matter. <s>Luckily</s> our heroes escape without being burned alive because they are not made of wood.

As the drama of the film increases in intensity, the audience are constantly worrying about what's going to happen to these characters that they've invested <s>a lot of time</s> 90 minutes in. A final battle between our human adventurers and the evil scum birds occurs, Ray and Nat using up their supplies and eventually cowering in the vehicle with the children, failing to act scared (they must be so brave). However, just as the wicked hand of fate looks like it is about to grasp Rod and Nathalie and end their lives forever, an army of <s>dubs</s> DOVES charges at the villainous attackers, chasing them off into the sunset. Perhaps the [[Christfags]] are right about the God thing after all.


== Quality ==
[[Image:birdemic quality.gif|thumb|right|250x|The movie's quality in a nutshell folks.]]

The quality of the movie can be summed up as a failure of a windows movie maker project, the birds look so real that they don't move much at all, they stand around like fucking retards waiting to be shot down, there's also that horrible bird voice acting that is used.

It's interesting however to see that the creators took the time to film their long-ass trip on car and put it there in the movie, makes you wonder if they filmed it while they're going to the next scene location.

There's also voice acting at it's finest people, people who look like big tools have decided to use their [[lol|expert]] acting to help make this movie reach the top, you can see it below:




<center><youtube>3cVtUnGPl5c</youtube></center>
<center>'''Regarded as the best acting ever.'''</center>

==Characters==
[[Image:Birdemic05.jpg|thumb|<s>Roy</s> <s>Ray</s> <s>Rob</s> Rod kicks some bird ass!!!5!!!]]

*<s>Ray</s> <s>Roy</s> <s>Rob</s> '''Rod'''
**Rod, played by [[robot|Alan Bagh]], is the worst person you could ever imagine. He's an [[chris-chan|autistic]] social fucktard who likes to tell lengthy anecdotes about his [[sarcasm|really very interesting]] life that manages to bore even the most seasoned [[oldfag]] to [[death]]. He is essentially the opposite of [[shit was so cash]] guy, containing no trace of swag or cool. He stalks women and his best friend is a sex-obsessed pervert. He's so awkward that he can't even walk properly without looking like a fucking robotic twat. All this is made even more annoying by the fact that he's able to hook up with a super hawt [[camwhore]], Nathalie. While you're [[alone]], with only your hand to give you sexual release, that dicknose is out there skewering hot babes with his rock hard rod.

*'''Nathalie'''
**Nathalie, played by Whitney Moore, has a fetish for people who walk like they've shit themselves. Either that or her attraction to Rod is due to his wealth.

[[Image:Birdemic 04 crop.jpg|thumb|The CGI in the film is too good, so look away if you're easily frightened.]]

==Reviews==

<center>{{morphquote|1|background-color: white; width: 80%; height: 200px;|font-weight: bold;
|Fantastic!|Writer, director and producer - James Nguyen
|Brilliant!|Writer, director and producer - James Nguyen
|What a movie!|Writer, director and producer - James Nguyen
|Sound? The sound was the best bit!|Writer, director, producer and sound engineer - James Nguyen
|Well I, for one, LOVED the effects!|Writer, director, producer and the guy who paid for the CGI - James Nguyen
|I demand an Oscar for Alan's performance of Roy! Or was it Rod?|Writer, director and producer - James Nguyen
|I demand a female equivalent of an Oscar for that woman's performance!|Writer, director, producer and casting director - James Nguyen
|If this film doesn't get a sequel, I'll be shocked!|Writer, director and producer - James Nguyen
|Awful. Piece of shit.|Most other people
}}</center>

==Gallery==

{{cg|le funny internets memes|birdemicgallery1|center|<gallery>
File:Birdemic guy.jpg|What are you talking about, [[lie|hilariously funny meme]] person?
File:Birdemic nom.jpg|The [[Americunts]] will be easy, we must conquer China first!
File:Buying glass.jpg|Got any glass, mutha fucka?
File:Topcapbottomcap.jpg|The internet is notoriously [[crap|brilliant]] at le humour.
</gallery>}}


== Videos ==
<center><big>'''WARNING: INTENSE, TERRIFYING IMAGERY'''</big></center><br>

<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<center>'''''The gang fight off some scary birds.'''''</center><youtube>LrxZblVUkMU</youtube>|
<center>'''''The worst song in a film ever? The worst song in a film ever!'''''</center><youtube>ui3TeqM1K28</youtube>|
<center>'''''In which there is a lot of clapping and poorly edited sound.'''''</center><youtube>3nObH1R9ONw</youtube>|
<center>'''''Rod totally picks up some hot babe.'''''</center><youtube>L1_lQjhphLg</youtube>|
<center>'''''The director speaks.'''''</center><youtube>ySqmnz5AcFc</youtube>|
<center>'''''Rifftrax try to be funny... how's that working out?'''''</center><youtube>zQVv_qNKkQQ</youtube>|
}}</center>


==See also==
*[[That Guy With The Glasses]]
*[[The Room]]
*[[Troll 2]]

{{Movies}}