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Same-sex marriage

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Same-sex marriage (formerly known as gay marriage, but that was too much faggotry) is a physical union between organisms of the same gender, like inconsequential sex between twin sisters, or an orgy between the six male octuplets in Octomom's litter, or a grandfather assfucking his adult grandson. Before the term was co-opted by sexual deviants dying of AIDS, "same-sex marriage" previously meant plain old marriage, where the same man and the same woman had the same sex for years until they were physically revolted by each other.

The time-tested union of same-sex marriage between related people of the same gender, like anal sex between consenting adult brothers, is based on the cultural myth of decoupling sex from reproduction, and reproduction from marriage, both promoted by child-hating, baby-killing, eugenics-loving feminist whores. Marriage was never a form of baby insurance to trap a man into staying and providing for children, since pregnant women have long been known for hunting woolly mammoths into extinction through all stages of pregnancy because YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL, YOU'RE WORTH IT. When barren women whose soil could hold no purchase started marrying for the purpose of property swaps, that allowed the laughable myth to emerge that State-sanctioned marriage is about love between two people, as if the State is required for love to exist through a gloryhole in the last stall at the public restrooms close to the pavilion at the park three blocks down from the soup kitchen on the left.

Marriage equality

The latest buzzword to be put in use by the progressive dipshits that spend all their time patting each other on the back for how "tolerant" and "accepting" they are. Much like the related term "income inequality".O shit, people make different amounts of money?

All marriage is equal, just like the height and weight of every starving gook in North Korea, a country based on equality. And no marriage is better or worse than any other marriage, which is why divorce is not a thing. Simply put, restricting marriage in any way shape or form is discrimination. That's why enlightened progressives in Yemen have been at the forefront of marriage equality by allowing grown men to marry 9-year-old girls, since children are citizens of their country with fundamental human rights to marry. But it's crazy to suggest this has been the eventual goal of Hollywood's gay agenda and promotion of sexual freedom and loosening of marriage restrictions all along, since Michael Jackson and Woody Allen are constantly denounced as monsters by media Jewry.

XX/XX and XY/XY

Same-sex marriage involves nihilistically mismatching genitals together (known as misgendering), just like God intended, and just like sex chromosomes in a godless universe mindlessly intended through the course of billions of years of evolution on this planet. The XY sex-determination system has no importance or historical significance to mammals whatsoever, not that such a thing even exists, since sex and gender are two different things according to your dyke college professor who smells really weird. Sex means gender and not a physical act, and gender is an emotion you feel in your heart while it pumps blood to your cells which each contain sex chromosomes, while you wear a wig and lipstick and pantyhose and take estrogen supplements while you tape your dick and balls between your legs or cut it off, because choosing the identity of victim will give you social status in a culture of pure tolerance and forced equality which seeks to erase all differences, first through mass production and eventually by technological cloning.

There is a broad scientific consensus that gender is first and foremost an identity that people assign themselves: like an angry virgin who self-identifies as a "nice guy", or Howard Stern who self-identifies as the "King of All Media", or a 5-year-old who self-identifies as "Iron Man" or "Sonic the Hedgehog", or David Koresh who claimed to be "Jesus Christ", or the "Zodiac" Killer.

Practitioners

Among humans, same-sex marriage is an act of supreme love and human dignity which was widely practiced by Jimmy Savile, and also by Jerry Sandusky anally raping young teen boys in showers. Sandusky enthusiastically performed many same-sex marriages throughout his coaching career, cumming in many rears, before he was shamefully victimized and terribly and unconstitutionally discriminated against by prejudiced haters and hateful bigots and treated like a second-class citizen, being imprisoned and denied the right of same-sex marriage by those who did not believe in marriage equality for all natural-born citizens and as a universal natural human right under equal protection of the law guaranteed by the constitutional right to love whoever you want according to who you are sexually attracted to, meaning assfuck hot young underage boipussy and get shit all over your dick and wipe it on the Constitution, just like George Washington fought the British in the American Revolutionary War for and brave meatshields fight for the right for you to do today.

Other victims of hate and discrimination include British schoolteachers and Catholic priests, perhaps the forerunners of same-sex marriage, performing multiple same-sex marriages daily on young boys for centuries. Inspired by the coaching role model Jerry Sandusky and those other old geezers in black robes in the Catholic Church, the unelected US Supreme Court (the main lawmaking body in Amerifat), legalized sodomy, laying pipe for gay marriage. Since hate and discrimination can lead to depression and suicide among those who engage in same-sex marriage, and since all gays believe that suicide is a sin against God (being murder of the first born), all things that can lead to depression were banned in the early 21st century, such as: gay marriage bans, being offended, shame, humiliation, the truth, sounds, words, images, books, peer pressure, advertising, the media, social media, the Internets, antidepressants, school, prison, work, boredom, factories, sweatshop labor, production, air pollution, traffic, cities, globalization, consumerism, civilization, climate change, natural disasters, the brain, the five senses, other people, sad things, life, and death.

Origin

Same-sex marriage derives from the Todestrieb, the death drive: the drive towards death, self-destruction, return to the inorganic, and the death instinct to return organic life back to an inanimate state. It is evidence of the Medea hypothesis which argues that multicellular life is ultimately suicidal, since shiteating faggots love to eat shit like a dog. Others animals do it too, which is in no way the naturalistic fallacy.

History

Marriage is a cultural institution that has always been about romantic love (as seen in Disney movies featuring gay villains), and since the concept of romance has always existed on this planet, same-sex marriage has a long history in the extant timescale of humanity, practiced in dingy public bathrooms for decades. Same-sex marriage is not some new untested liberal social experiment like Prohibition of alcohol, or eugenics, or the Industrial Revolution, since it was legalized by liberal dopesmoking red-light-district Dutch faggots in Holland in 2001, who suddenly realized that all mammals had been doing it wrong for their entire existence on Earth.

Love is love and haters gonna hate, wise words given to us by the LGBTQGPBOVND community and black Twitter and 13-year-old Tartlets through millenia of generational experience successfully living on this planet and benefiting humanity and human culture millions of man-hours wasted OTI. These are not superficial tautological logical fallacies however. Same-sex marriage is also known as tautological marriage (from the Greek root "tautos" for "the same"), whereby repeating the same assertion using different words, the proposition as stated is logically irrefutable, while obscuring the lack of evidence or valid reasoning supporting the stated conclusion.

   
 
"If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State."
 

 
 

—Herr Goebbels, Reich Minister of Propaganda in Nazi Germany, and inspirational guide of sexual deviants who seek the power of the State to repress dissent

Supporters

Same-sex marriage is supported by people who have no stake in the future of humanity, and straight people who watch Ellen, and were told repeatedly by gay Hollywood Jews that Modern Family was a good television show, and who have never even seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Since The Rocky Horror Picture Show rarely, if ever, appears on network television, this decline in Rocky Horror Picture Show literacy has led the majority of Americans to cum in favor of same-sex marriage between adult siblings. But Fox is now remaking it, going all-in balls-to-ass after John Waters appeared on The Simpsons, after creating Glee, and ever since jumpstarting Ed O'Neill's career of destroying the institution of marriage on "Not the Cosbys".

The fact that same-sex humans could never produce biological children together in a billion years (without technological wankery which will be defacto legal in 100 years since Tim Cook is a faggot and since the Greys are all female and needed human male sperm to offset centuries of inbreeding) is no existential condemnation whatsoever on the loving sexual bond between two same-sex relatives, like Lena Dunham and her sister, or a grandfather and his grandson, or a grandmother and her granddaughter, or a father and a son, or a mother and a daughter, or two same-sex cousins, or a faggot flight attendant who gets his fuckhole barebacked in every country he visits since GOD LOVES AIDS.

The Act

Same-sex marriage is a hilarious farce based on the beautiful idea of saving money on your taxes, and being able to see your buttbuddy in the hospital who has AIDS up his butthole for some reason. Same-sex marriage is an elaborate form of role-playing and play-acting based on the nuclear family -- which is the only reason any humans exist. But fuck the nuclear family amirite? Yet it's good enough to imitate?

Same-sex marriage is a drag show, where performers stage theatrical presentations, and lip-sync and pantomime based on the nuclear family, usually in order to save money on rent, or to force small businesses to make them cakes featuring gay blowjobs made with fondant. Same-sex couple are mimes that talk and these homosexual actors perform 24/7. After countless generations of nuclear families, same-sex faggots think they know better than evolution and every single one of their ancestors. The social trends of shacking up, single mothers, and sexual deviancy were all stepping stones to the farce that is same-sex marriage. Not even Ancient Rome had same-sex marriage, which shows you how far detached from reality humanity has become, living in a constant state of denial and preferring The Neighborhood of Make-Believe to any discomfort whatsoever. It's no coincidence that the debut of Modern Family in 2009 came not long after the release of the Snuggie sleeved blanket.

Based on the erroneous belief spread by faggots and RuPaul that you "choose" your own "family" (as if anyone "chose" their mother and father), same-sex marriage is a mental illness centered around the social constructs of "romantic love" and the "marriage license." After arguing that marriage is all about love (as if love cannot exist until marriage), same-sex couples then say that love is not enough, and are constantly looking for reasons to sue people based on "discrimination" so they can buy more antiques and kitschy commodities, in order to show their love for consumerism and their disrespect for the nuclear family (including the one they were born into). Gay propaganda terms like "modern family" imply that the nuclear family is a flawed concept, a colossal mistake, an inferior arrangement, a damaged institution (of which faggotry is the supposed cure, or at least the retard who "deserves" a medal too), while maintaining that same-sex marriage is not a counterfeit, an imitation, a sham, a fraudulent reproduction, a simulation. According to liberalism and liberal guilt, calling people a fraud or a phony hurts their feelings, then people might kill themselves. But same-sex couples are already committed to slow-motion suicide, and Injun teens have the highest rate of suicide, not flaming faggots. Despite this troubling data, Amerilard shows no interest in making it legal to marry peyote. This is because Americunts forgot Injuns exist since they don't appear on TV, except in the mascots of sports teams and the names of military weaponry.

When society started treating bitches and niggers and retards sentimentally like people with "special needs" who needed "special treatment" and protection instead of like accountable fellow human beings who can be total fucking assholes, the stage was set for same-sex marriage: the retarded sibling of traditional marriage and the nuclear family. Oddly enough, many same-sex couples who want to get married also want to snatch other people's children. These marriage-retards want to compete in the marriage-Olympics too. Or rather, these shallow faggots are jealous of the conspicuous consumption and aristocratic idea of excess and wasteful expenditure of a big gay wedding. Don't gays deserve to wear blood diamonds on their hands too, as a symbol of their undying commitment to saving money on estate taxes?

Same-sex couples are children "playing house", while insisting they are adults. Since adults no longer exist on Earth as of 2015, due to technical innovations like grocery stores and TV and washing machines and videogames and sleeved blankets and self-driving cars, such childish make-believe is widely encouraged by capitalistic society, much like capeshit and cosplay. For same-sex couples, Halloween is every day, and their costume is the nuclear family. Same-sex couples hate mothers and fathers and want to pit Mother's Day and Father's Day against each other in a gay Thunderdome, while they spectate in assless chaps and revel in our current planetary extinction event, while they bingewatch people pretending to be something they're not (same-sex couples outside courthouses pretending to be married).

Parenting

A stolen kid used as a billboard.

Couples who engage in same-sex marriage often claim they can be parents too, like slugs or snails. However, same-sex couples can only be parents by stealing the children of others, like the Child Catcher or the Pied Piper or Michael Jackson or the sick fuck serial killer Otis Toole who kidnapped and murdered Adam Walsh, the son of TV host John Walsh of America's Most Wanted, which aired for 23 years on Fox, which also created the traditional-marriage-promoting programs Married With Children, In Living Color featuring two flaming homos, and Glee.

Reproduction and marriage are unrelated, since calling people "bastards" is bigotry, and it would make barren people who can't have children like Kanye West feel bad. The lack of a biological father in the home of two out of three African-Americans has nothing to do with rioting in Baltimore. Raising other people's children as your own is perfectly natural, as known by every man who marries a black woman, every kidnapper, heroin addict Angelina Jolie, every pedophile with a windowless van, every childless female belly-slashing fetus-thief, homosexual serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, and sexual assault victim and homosexual serial killer Ottis Toole, whose trailblazing mother used to dress him in girls' clothing and call him Susan. Srsly.

June 26th, 2015

As of this date, fag marriage is now legal in all 50 states, allowing everyone to spread the faggotry around even more because they can marry now.

Crap.

Displays of Faggery

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See also

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Sex

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Homosexual Deviants

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