RedLetterMedia

	“	You can't fuck em if they're dead.	„
	—Rich Evans

	“	Yes you can.	„
	—Mike Stoklasa

Red Letter Media in a nutshell

RedLetterMedia is a Jewish company that is dedicated to stealing the work of other people and publishing it as their own, It was made back in 2004 and unfortunately it is still somehow on YouTube. They became popular when Mike Stoklasa made a 30 minutes long review of Star Trek Generations in 2008 despite that shit was made back in 1994. In it, he plays a character called Mr. Plinkett, which is based upon a character Mike played in a short film, because he is too dumb to make up new characters. They also have a tendency to have all the 'humor' be meta, because that makes them very smart and funny like Monty Python, right?

The Crew

Mike Stoklasa - Perma-depressed alcoholic film critic and creator of RLM. He started out a as young, healthy and optimistic lad, but with every passing year he seemingly tends to drift more and more into the abyss. This is also noticeable from the lack of creative content. Plinkett review releases are almost non-existant, everything is either Half in the Bag (basic bitch movie criticism) or Best of the Worst (sit together and watch movies), specials don't tend to happen anymore. The Space Cop movie was a complete disaster and was the final nail in his moviemaking career - coffin (just like James Rolfe's AVGN movie). Mike is the only reason people watched them from the start and it genuinely seems like he's going senile. The situation is pretty sad, especially when you go back to RLM's earlier videos and then look at him today - the spark and wit is gone.

He's the leader of the bunch. You know him well. He's finally back, to release a Plinkett review. His deadpan humor can hire in spurts, if he makes you laugh, it's gonna hurt. He's bigger, fatter, and stronger too. He's the first member of the RLM crew.

Rich Evans - This sad, weird combination of fetal alcohol syndrome, druggie parents childhood, abuse victim, permafatness and nostalgia-addiction is used as the group's deadbeat punching bag and clown. Equipped with a shrill, squeaky laughter, he is the noisiest of the bunch, and usually has the worst opinions. His criticism of media boils down to "old good, new bad". His out of shape body makes him constantly look like he's on the verge of crying. While he's the important handyman who builds the sets, he's also the worst actor and couldn't perform even if his miserable life depended on it.

This guy's got style, so listen up dudes, he can laugh on command, to suit the mood. He's quick and nimble when he needs to be, he can stream a video game, or watch people climb up trees, if you choose him, you'll not choose wrong, with a groan and an oh my gawd, he's one tough RLM

Jack Packard (aka AIDS Moby, Cueball McFaggot, the Milwaukee Molester, Reddit FourEyes, or CinemaCuck) - The most hated of the RLM regulars due to his shit sense of humor and garbage political views (he would like the government to have full control over the internet). His attempt to collaborate with Rich Evans to review videogames ended in total failure, because both were too lazy to appear on camera and edit videos. In a last ditch attempt they tried to stream, but were extremely uncharismatic in doing so. Jack in general contributes very little, aside from appearing in a skit or pointing out obvious things in bad movies before they happen. He split off from RLM several times, but comes running back whenever he's starving for attention. Surprisingly he's the only one in the group with children.

He has no style. He has no grace. This RLM has a funny face. He can overextend a laugh, when he needs to or stretch his legs after a stream, just for you. Inflate his gut, just like a balloon. This crazy RLM just digs this tune.

Jay Bauman (aka Susan) - This horror film fanatic and pretentious movie lover started off as the ugly duckling of the group, but after a couple of years started to work out, took care of his beard and fixed his teeth. This change of looks earned him a freaky cult of fangirls and faggots, but also attracted a shitton of normies to the channel, who view Jay as the average everyman critic and prettyboy who never holds any hard views on topics, aka he's an indecisive bitch. He usually conforms with Mike's views on topics, as to not offend him too much. Jay often seems confused as to why he even is there in the first place and deep down probably wishes he had chosen a proper career.

Back again, and about time too, and this time, he's in the mood. He can commentate really good with a movie on, with his beer out, he's after you. He'll make you smile when he appears on Previously Recorded, and shit posters beware CUZ he's after you.

Josh Davis (aka Beardfat) - He's the cardboard cutout of the generic dudebro who does absolutely nothing, laughs with everyone and pretends to be in good company. Completely forgetable and sarcastically gets called "the heart & soul" of early RLM.

Finally. He's here for you. It's the last member of the RLM crew. This guy is so unfunny, it isn't funny, he'll make the shitposters cry out for mommy, ruin a video with relative ease, make enjoying RLM seem not such a breeze, he may move slow, he can't quip high, but this RLM is one hell of a guy.

Shows

Mr. Plinkett Reviews

If you like hour-long reviews made by a wheelchair-bound murderer and rapist this might be something for you. If you also happen to be an easily manipulated balding millenial fuckwad and care about movies that came out when VHS was still a thing, yet you still don't have the necessary perception and/or intelligence to form your own thoughts about anything, these videos are definitely your cup of tea.

What the common Mr. Plinkett review consists of

Star Wars VII - The Force Awakens Review

In 2016, after years of waiting, Mike released his newest iteration of the Plinkett reviews. Hopes were high, as the absolutely unfunny, unwanted, and unnecessary review of Titanic impressed absolutely no one. The thing with the new Plinkett is that it's not about the recent Star Wars movie, it's about Mike. You see, he's obviously having some sort of mid-life crisis and made this video for an ego boost: "I invented the Star Wars reviews posted on YouTube!" "TFA is a decent film because of MY contributions!". "Millenials BTFO!" You will start to realize some lines in the video like "I AM the internet" may not have as many layers of irony as you thought.

It's the reason why a fat, balding man was the only one to point out the supposed lack of sex in the film, as he lacks sex himself (ED or Jesse simply doesn't want him physically anymore) and projected his crisis into the movie. Other YouTube reviewers didn't notice this, because they can easily cum with their gfs or porn.

He is feeling old, and can't properly criticize TFA, because it makes him feel the same way he felt as he watched "A New Hope" for the very first time. He'll leave the movie alone, but make fun of younger fans who are just having fun (like the guys in the convention), presenting them as obsessed fanboys, while the Ring Theory segment ironically exposes him as an obsessed nerd who has probably seen every Star Wars film 50 times or more.

He became George Lucas. He became Plinkett.

Half In The Bag

Mike and his buddy Jay (Susan) are working as VHS repairmen, get it? It is funny because nobody uses VHS anymore. Here the hacks are talking shit about new movies, all while having unfunny skits featuring the Mr. Plinkett character, played by unfunny faggot Rich Evans, who does not even sound like the original Mr. Plinkett. Great acting.

When future generations sift through the smoldering rubble of postmodern America, they would do well to locate a hard drive with RedLetterMedia content on it. They could study Mike and Jay and, with that thin slice of information, fully understand what it is that killed western civilization.

Those two are bitter, cynical nihilists. They have devoted their lives, the prime years of productivity, to pithily lampooning cultural ephemera and implying "we could do better than these idiot filmmakers, but we're too cool to actually try."

They are every strain of societal AIDS melded together into a super AIDS of cultural death...

Well into middle age, they're still obsessively analyzing adventure stories for children. They're childless, unmarried, stubbornly avoiding an actual profession, opting instead to beg for Patreon donations. They are subsisting on the patronage of even more embittered, more lonely, more cynical losers who need virtual friends to swim in their vast Petri dish of misery with them.

Look in their fucking eyes, man. It's a joyless, pointless existence they're living.

They are so afraid of sincerity or honest artistic effort that they'll leave behind hours of footage of them chuckling about Tommy Wiseau. They are artistic cowards and abject failures in every respect.

Each time you catch a glimpse of them, you're reminded that we peaked as a civilization a long time ago. We're done creating. We're done feeling real emotions. All we can do now is analyze, criticize, and ironically pick through the desiccated corpse of our once-great nation.

Encyclopedia Dramatica hopes on the day that footage is uncovered by future archaeologists, they resolve to never repeat the mistakes we made.

Best of the Worst / Wheel of the Worst / Plinketto

In yet another unfunny segment, the gang, featuring a bald fuck, a fat fuck, some random people with booze will watch some "randomly"-chosen shit-tier B-movies. They then decide to prolong it to unwatchable lengths of at least an hour and decide which movie is the best of the ones watched. Most of the time they don't even watch it or rather show enough reaction footage, so their opinion is completely invalid.