Project Utopia
| Democratic People's Republic of Дnonia Корейская Народно-Демократическая Республика Дnonia | |
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| Motto: Nos pro cachinnis, (Russian: "Мы делаем это для смеха", "We do it for the lulz") (traditional) | |
| Anthem: Fresh Prince Rolled
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| Capital (largest city) |
/b/opolis |
| Official languages | English, Russian, Sandnigger |
| Ethnic groups | 80% Aryan 10% Nigger 5% Jews 5% FBI |
| Government | Dystopian anarcho-dictatorial communazism |
| Pope | moot |
| CEO | Stalin |
| Eternal President | Kim Jong Il |
| Czar of Child Welfare | Pedobear |
| Czar of Child Warfare | Joseph Kony |
| Currency |  |
| National Animal | mudkipz |
| National sport | Fapping |
| National food | Bacon Blanket |
| National holidays | Caturday |
| National Television Network | Fox 11 |
| Primary Exports | Lulz, CP |
| Primary Imports | Bacon, weeaboos, traps |
Project Utopia is the name of the glorious path to enlightenment that all *chaners ought to follow, whereby degenerate Capitalism gives way to a Dictatorship of the Lolertariat, which then voluntarily gives up its dictatorship in favor of stateless, lawless Utopia, which is currently manifest in DPRД. Project Utopia advocates peaceful revolution by armed non-violence, whereby no becomes yes and the reactionaries come to like having a throbbing, cat-shaped bacon-dildo thrust enthusiastically into their gaping asshole.
Deathless Ideals
- Smash the state through a combination of IRL and virtual pool-closings.
- Ship all of the counter-revolutionary lulz-killers to Siberia, and let Uncle Putin take care of them
- Nationalize production of lulz
- Decentralize the meme-industrial-complex in favor of horizontal image macro production and democratic polls
Revolutionary Stirrings
DPRД's ideology was founded in 4chan-oblast by Comrade Дnonymous over a cold bowl of vodka-soaked cheerios on March 4th and 5th, 2008. Numerous other anon assisted in the generation of this idea, all of whom constitute the revolutionary foun/d/ing father/s/. To this day, the Party Council gently guides the execution of Project Utopia, and the development of the International Lulz Union toward Utopia.
Laws
CP
CP and Childlove were liberated from the oppressive vestiges of bourgeoisie morality, as per the dictate of the foun/d/ing father/s/.
Women's Rights
It was declared by fatwa that there are no women on the internet, except for porn, and except when under the age of 12 and under proper supervision by men certified by the Czar for Children's Welfare.
Minority Rights
The state's official position on the holocaust is one of skepticism and muted enthusiasm, and a "furry holocaust" has been part of the political campaign of every politician since inception.
Abortion and Eugenics
Being retarded is punishable by death, and all women with retarded fetus are summarily falcon-punched to induce abortion.
Military
DPRД's military might includes AIDs Bombers, via the ChairForce, the A.S.S. Hole, via the Buttpirate Brigade, and Bear Cavalry courtesy of Revolutionary #insurgency. It exports these weapons to the highest bidder, but is primarily concerned with raiding nearby coastal countries for women to repopulate. DPRД is also famous for their divisions of highly-trained loli mercenaries, who are brought to level 99 via cloned rarecandies by the Czar of Child Warfare.
Declaration of Incontinence
Now this is a story all about how: <br\>we hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men (no wymnz) are created to fap, and that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Cheezburgers, Trolling and the pursuit of Lulz.
That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men (again not wymnz, gb2kitchen, also TITS OR GTFO), deriving their just powers from the consent of the powahs that be (i.e. longcat), That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends (ie anti-lulz), it is the Right of Anonymous to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Pornography and Lulz. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of faggotry and AIDS, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Loldongs for their future security.
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Project Utopia is part of a series on Visit the Chans Portal for complete coverage. |