Postfurry

If only postfurry meant what it sounds like...

Postfurries in their natural habitat. From L to R: Peganthyrus, Postrodent, Postvixen, Waterotter

Postfurry = postmodern furry = ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff*

* ffffffffffffff is not to scale. There is not an fffffffffffffff big enough to properly describe this concept.

The name may make "postfurry" sound like a former furry who recovered. Unfortunately, it's not even close. This subtype of furry is much like the standard issue, with the following exceptions:

• costumes generally have more glossy plastic and less faux fur; thus do the furry and raver scenes draw inexorably closer.
• lots of pretentious babble about "xenofetishes" and "sensuality" to justify yiffing; this, with the usual furry tendency toward verbosity, makes finding the lulz an experience both soporific and retina-searing.
• groomed to become or in the process of being a female, women's underwear is part of the uniform for girls and manchildren.
• every postfurry will have at least five jealously guarded pseudonyms, and they will pretend to be amused when someone connects them (after the rage calms).

Postfurry's raison d'être is to ruin postmodernism, which itself is a juvenile pop-art movement. TOW states that "postmodernism tends to refer to a cultural, intellectual, or artistic state lacking a clear central hierarchy or organizing principle and embodying extreme complexity, contradiction, ambiguity, diversity, interconnectedness or interreferentiality, in a way that is often indistinguishable from a parody of itself." In brief it is a vast intellectual circlejerk and exercise in mental masturbation. Postfurry one-ups this by making it strictly anti-intellectual and adding real masturbation to it. Unintentional self-parody amirite.

A postfurry muses on the Heideggerian duality of cocks and dongs

Created largely by Postvixen and good friend (but not postfurry ok) Protocat, the postfurry philosophy revolves around being more intelligent and creative than most living beings. In theory this means they can find something good in pneumatic foxtaurs and glass catgirls. In reality the postfurry is just required to mindlessly quote the Principia Discordia, namedrop Barths/Burroughs/Foucault/Baudrilliard, enjoy everything most people hate, and be feminine. Anything masculine is exorcised or tucked into a pair of violet panties. As a result any sort of critical thought or actual creativity is quickly banned and named anathema. And yet it claims to be intellectual.

The postfurry movement kicked off on TapestriesMUCK, which is like a MUD only level-grinding has been replaced with social-grinding and Magic Missile with furry cartoon sex. After spending years on Tapestries raping each other in the toolshed and yelling at everyone who was certainly less cool than they were, the manchildren built their own private virtual bar; after they decided that being on Tapestries was still not cool enough for them, they built their own MUCK named Puzzlebox. Puzzlebox is identical to Tapestries but Postvixen has the administrative rights to ban anyone who he thinks is not being faithful their pretendy funtime game.

There is really nothing positive or funny about them. All entertainment value is drived through atrocity tourism. No wonder they hate most of the Internet.

Remember, Christians believe that Jesus died for these people.

These are all incredibly attractive and intelligent people as you would expect of the philosophical jet-set. You can go read an article on why postfurry is so great if you really have that much free time. Despite stepping down from Puzzlebox administration, the generally-acknowledged ring leader is Postvixen, who will probably start chortling smugly in one or more of his 69 LiveJournals about being described as such any minute now.

A gender-bemused postfurry

See also

• Gay
• Goth
• Role-playing
• Convention

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