European Martial Arts

European Martial Arts is the biggest case of "White Nerd's Burden" (oh don't worry, we'll make an article on this soon) this side of the Western World. Formulated when dickless and pussywhipped chumps of "leet martial arts experts" were tired of being outdone by Japanese martial arts and katana experts and only brought to the brink of envy and annoyance of weeaboos, European Martial Arts soon rose in their own levels of annoyance and fatheaded selfcentered exclusive vindictive White Pride faggotry and ignorance outside of real world history regarding the events of the 20th Century. Trust us in that when we write an article about losers that match the annoyance of Weeb sensibilities and can push the boundaries further, this is going to be some fuck.

About European Martial Arts

European Martial Arts is a neologism regarding martial arts practiced by knights and infantry before the rise of firearms based armies, but fuck in putting Savate or Irish Stick Fighting, right?

In the reality of the tubes and the webs, European Martial Arts is a go to term for any frustrated White teen or hardcore Renaissance Fair manchild that enjoys treading the lines of being a pussyfoot ethnocentric PC faggot instead of leaping into the fray and becoming a true Aryan Brother against those "japs and nips", by bringing up the superiority of the White Man's weapons and techniques to fight off "weeaboo self hating cringe and them evil nips". Because your own social conditions and repercussions of historic events taking their toll on the world right now has absolutely nothing to do with that, does it?

European Martial Arts covers:

• Weapons
• Weapons
• More weapons
• Specifications of weapons
• Maths
• More Maths
• Western World sensibilities
• More Western World sensibilities
• Western Science
• More Western Science
• Why the White man is superior than everyone else
• More Aryan persuasion
• ????
• ????????
• How to masturbate your cock with weapons
• How to make the nerds from The Big Bang Theory look better than you (spoilers EVER SINCE THAT SHOW STARTED THEY ALWAYS HAVE)
• TL;DR

It appears that the whole purpose of European Martial Arts is to out do the White Man's cringe against "the worst of weeaboos", but as you can see, they clearly fail at even that. Just like how their ancestors grief queefed over how their relatives Knights were shot down against a single gun wield by a peasant, European Martial Artists are truly the masters of Bullshitdo in that they "wish to dispel the myths that have rose since the decline of EMA after the Industrial Revolution" but have only helped continue the "White Sycophant's Burden" of feeling superior and showing off in their White Power Manliness pecking order to not get shit on by those who have constantly mocked them and given them wedgies in High School, as if that will curry favors with the shitheads higher on top and make them "cool" again (spoilers: it doesn't, cry yourselves to sleep and enjoy chasing dick shaped carrots forever). Likewise, their only contributions have been to ignite racist attitudes in white nerds, actively participate in online cabals of anti-cross cultural pro discrimination, encourage self hating cultural and racial cringe in half bloods and minorities who live in White Culture dominant hemispheres of the world, active discrimination against Asians, and the agenda of hoping to reestablish the Racial Superiority Ladder with them on top. However, unlike the Aryan Brotherhood and the KKK, whose shit at least get them on the news and media, they get to enjoy the shit filled bottom with Stormfront, Something Awful and Reddit on ED because a lot of them are antisocially inept and severely self esteem crippled ugly retards who use nothing but the internet all day and spew out whatever they got out of their 40k debt including 4 year Bachelors Degree from Know-It-All U.

How to spot a European Martial Arts practitioner

European Martial Artists are never outside. Never. Not even. Not even at that so called Renaissance Fair they are reputed to be at. Not even at events regarding European based Martial Arts. They COULD be ninjas but not even ninjas are as fucking retarded to leave evidence of existing on comments sections and forums on the internet. Hell, they hate "japs". Where the fuck was I going with this?

You see, the ancient art of Bullshitdo is a very good way of showing the phrase "All talk, no show". Say what you will about Ryuken Yanagi, that guy at least got into a fight. EM Artists? HAH. Even the Japanese do EMA better than these fucks.

European Martial Artists are, well, again, antisocial but socially aware hypocrites who "cringe at the flamboyant" but will rise like a horse's cock should they opportunities to land and "manliness" (translated: superficial dickmeasuring douchebaggery) to show off. As we speak, they do nothing more but lurk on 4chan, Cracked, TV Tropes, Xbox Live, Steam, Here right now, Pornhub, and the rest of the internet, using their keyboards to White Knight their way against the "evil jap barbarians and their weeaboo filthkin" with superficial pedantry this side of Richard Dawkins and Patton Oswald and such devoted fervor that only a fat fedora wearing cheeto diet Atheist would display in his Debate class or against Grandma. Their vast ranks include gamers ("Western Dev Only" and PC are a majority), cynics, know it all science nerds, Fedorafags, the most jaded and vindictive of the White Man this side of Frank Grimes, and again, antisocial testosterone challenged sycophants. Even a five year old yellow belt is capable of beating the living shit out of these losers who would give after a second of physical activity.

Much like any posse of howler monkeys and mangy garbage eating horndogs, EM Artists band together for power in numbers. As soon as they see some kid on their forums posting up his excitement about Japan and the animu they jump on him like a pride of lions for their cheap pride and E-Dickery, before homo touching each other on a shared IRC over their "victories" and masturbating to leaked nudes of video game cosplayers. Hey fags, remember Karate Kid from the 80's, you underage b&? Remember the Cobras? Even you don't got shit on them, scrawnyfag/fatfag/loserfag.

Further attributes include:

• Yelling at people about how Katanas are nothing but "cheap jap shit made with poor steel"
• Priding equipment and physics over psychology and real life
• Men's Rights Activists and Cucked Feminism SJWs
• Never doing any research
• Always is some pedantic faggot who preaches and raves about "realism" when he focuses on theoretics and hypothesis
• Being unethical and morally bereft egotistic hooligans that enjoy giving anyone related with their martial arts community a bad name
  • Likewise, cherrypicks anything from Asian literature and media, before espousing how his martial arts are more feasible
• Is a Role Player and Western Fantasy genre hobbyist
• Seeking ways to boost their self esteem through belligerence and "outdoing the normals and the losers"
• Will switch from European Martial Arts practitioner to Krav Maga, Mixed Martial Arts, Modern Military Martial Arts practitioner, AND gun enthusiast in a heartbeat if they ever are faced with anything that challenges and dares to cripple their superiority
  • Grammar Nazis who think I should have capitalized "gun enthusiast" ("I decide who is a jew?" Who wudda thunk?)
• Those who believe that American History X should have ended with the deleted scene where the main character goes back to being a skinhead again

How to piss them the fuck off

• Endlessly parade about the glories and greatness of Japanese swords and martial arts, or well, any, non European weapon or martial arts
• Ask them if they roll dice when they fight in real life
• Remind them that LARPing is not a real martial art
• Ask them to know when they LARP
• Ask them anything about how the knights died off
• "Why not just use a gun?"
• Remind them when Europe up and adopted firearms based militias
• Remind them why a knight would lose in a gun fight
• Remind them about reality in general
• Ask them if they've "rescued any fair maidens or princesses" yet
• Beat them at their own game and explain to them that "history has already been made, you have no way to prove it"

Evidence

Lurking places

• TV Tropes