Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/August 5, 2025

Internet Tough Guy

Behold, the Internet Tough Guy. Also known as a Keyboard Warrior or Armchair Warrior or "Donga", he talks nothing but big shit online and doesn't afraid of anything. Usually male (for there are no girls on the internet).
As he will thoroughly explain to you, he is respected and feared by ALL; no way he's skittish to casually throw around ep1c insultz and one-lieners like "go fuck yourself," or "u aint done sucking my dick." He swears a lot just to show how hardcore he is. God help you if you even dare defy him by delivering some sort of retort when he says something to you, or practicing fuzzy logic on his userpage, or even reading whatever he posted and writing replies of disagreement (or even agreeing responses, in some cases) relating exactly to what you just read ... No, you can't do that. No. No. You don't even know him or what he's about. Internet Tough Guy isn't someone you should mess with, ever. That's right bitch, you cross the line and he will come to your house and fuck you up so bad and rape you so hard and kill you so god damn dead OH SHIT. You must have pissed yourself by now from these horrific threats of bodily harm. Because if someone threatens you online, that's it. Game over man. Game over! Do not fuck with da man! You are d-e-a-d, DEAD! Nothing can save you. Not even that new dog you just bought. You might as well kill yourself now...
Actually, IRL, Internet Tough Guy, there? He's a total fag or a basement-dweller, with a high chance of being a redneck and/or skinhead. Sometimes, the Internet Tough Guy will actually be somewhat "tough." However, this makes him about four times more of a total fag. The sad reality is that these people are a concentrated form of noob, not one of whom can grasp the concept that they obviously are never actually going to be able to make good on their intimidating remarks, or that their low-IQ ramblings do not impress the Internet nor physically affect people on it in any way. More simply put, when nobodies such as themselves make empty threats and loudmouthed, prick statements to unknown persons whom they have never met and do not know the locations of, it does not equal being a badass, becoming dominant to the other users, nor actually going full ass-rape/ass-kick on someone.

The typical Internet Tough Guy can be found in nearly every community on LJ but often resides in his parent's basement for at least 7 days a week. (And not because he's trying to make it into an imaginary apartment, either). Usually, his parents banished him to the unfinished, wet, moldy, cold and dark basement because they couldn't stand either his smell or the fact that he is a disgrace to the family name. 99.9999% chance he is also subject to frequent pwning. By everyone. (He won't admit it, though. He "won" because he swore a lot. And disabled replies.) From furry communities, to fandom communities, to political communities, the Internet Tough Guy is one of the many stock users that make up a community.

(( I Can Press 400 Pounds, A Former Navy Seal And a Third Degree Black Belt. Come At Me Bro ))

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