Lucky Star

This article needs moar Rule 34.
You can help by adding moar Rule 34.

I just saved you 9 and a half hours of pain. Go do something productive!

Lucky ☆ Star is an overrated animu that most of /a/ has been creaming their pants over since its debut in April 2007. Catering to pedophiles, the show follows the completely ordinary lives of 17-year-old high school girls, drawn to resemble 8-year-olds, which makes fapping to the public bath scene totally okay. While the show may have its moments, like Tsukasa being gang raped by some deer, or when Konata's dad has one of his "Kimura" moments, the funny moments are few and far between. Most of the show is just long sequences of dialog that last for what seem like hours, wrapped up with one witty retort when each scene closes.

The only three reasons weeaboos like to waste their time watching this show on Youtube are as follow:

The show has anime references pouring out its overrated ass
The characters' aspect ratio; they're all around 17-years-old but look like they're 8
Each girl's personality is designed to appeal specifically to the ronery otaku, which explains why you love it

It is extremely easy to troll the shit out of the Raki Sutah fanbase, as they are the figurine-collecting, futon-lounging, hentai-ogling otakus who most likely own at least one of those creepy pillows with an anime girl printed on it, and they honestly have nothing better to do than defend the show containing their imaginary loli girlfriends.

Lucky Star has also caught the eye of the hentai industry, thanks to its popularity with the lolicon characters among its fans, their favorite character being Konata, the blue haired girl with the retarded expression who every one of them wants to either fuck, see nekkid or getting it on with Kagami, or all three. Well, look no further you sick fucks, the shameless collection of Lucky Star porn can be found here, which includes all that and more for your viewing pleasure. See you in 3 weeks.

Plot

Lucky ☆ Star consists of the "protagonists", consisting of four main characters who are all girls, being unfunny retards, referring to other animes, and being fags. For every episode, simply imagine 30 minutes of lolis talking, and talking, and talking, and talking, and talking, and talking, and talking, and talking, and OMG IT'S SO STINKY!, and looking "cute". The only real reason anyone watches this shit is to have something to base their yuri fantasies on. Or rape, if you're a pedophile.

Lucky Star's "humor" comes from observations from daily life, like how to eat a pastry with chocolate inside it. However, unlike proper observational comedy, Lucky Star contains no punchlines, so watching the anime is the equivalent to watching an arse-pie narrating every zany thing they witness without any wit nor cleverness involved. So all in all, it's pretty much just an enormous cocktease for sad otakus and provides no real plot and a script that a down-syndrome child could create.

Lolis

Kagami, secret fan of Yaoi, but denies it.

Konata Izumi
The main character in the series and unofficial leader of the "protagonists". She's the blue haired one with a retarded expression weeaboos often confuse as "cute". She's the perfect example of an Otaku, who fucks away most of her time playing H-games, fapping to Yuri doujins, reading manga, poking fun at superior animes, playing MMORPGs with her teacher and getting gang raped by Meito Anisawa and his accomplices for useless anime merchandise she doesn't want. Unlike you, she gets a job at a Cosplay café so she can fund her habit. Like nearly all the other characters, she has no tits.

She exists primarily as a device to insert as many Haruhi references as humanly possible and more.

The typical scene in *Lucky Star* when Tsukasa takes her first look at lemonparty on her cell phone.

Kagami Hiiragi
The purple long-haired one, the second most talkative character in the series and easily the most annoying. She's a nerd and a bit of a religious bitch, not to mention other characters in the series think she's scary as fuck. She bitches constantly throughout the show because Konata copies her homework, even though the fucking retard lets her, which is why fanboys believe she is gay for Konata. She's also a fatass in her own eyes, constantly bitching about her weight, which is apparently over 9000 and her non-existant love life is a hot topic on Konata's mind for some reason. The only "action" she gets is getting a note from a boy in one episode, so automatically she thinks he wants to fuck her silly and she thought he was interested in her, so they meet up in the dark, alone. But he only wanted a toy she bought. Forever Alone.

She also has tits, though in the pedostyle of Kagami Yoshimizu, they are never drawn.

Tsukasa Hiiragi
Kagami's twin sister, but she has short hair and looks nothing like her. She is the polar opposite of Kagami, in that she is a dumb shit with the attention span of a bag of cucumbers, evident when she left her phone in her pocket while her clothes got washed. So like Konata, she copies Kagami's homework. She is basically Lucky Star's Osaka, the only difference being that Tsukasa is good in the kitchen and doesn't mistake a knife for a frying pan. Like the other Lolis, she also has invisible tits.

Minami (almost) exposing her flat chest to the world.

Miyuki Takara
The pink haired not-quite-loli character who owns the only pair of tits in the entire series, with the exception of the adults. The only reason for her existance is to provide a pair of tits to reassure you the show isn't just for pedophiles. Secondarily, she often provide tl;dr explanations of things like why hair loses its color under sunlight, the difference between a Cold and the Flu and other shit things the characters wonder about in their daily lives, when they could actually be doing shit and being funny. She's shit-scared of the dentist, loves sleeping, and is shit-scared of having contact lenses. But never mind, glasses will always be someones fetish. She became a mega ultra super genius by frequently looking shit up on Google for her mother when she was growing up, because her mother is about as intelligent as a sack of potatoes. She's also a bit of an airhead, most of the episodes revolve around her being clumsy or being a forgetful shit.

She's also rich.

Misao uttering her catchphrase. Translated: "I suck cock!", but be careful of the fang.

Yutaka Kobayakawa
Yet another pedobait moe titless character in the series, because Kyoto Animation studios and Kagami Yoshimizu (the series writer) honestly think that too much is never enough. She has pink hair, is even shorter than Konata, her clothes are too big for her and has even less tits. She lived with Yui before moving in with Konata. She calls Konata "onee-chan" despite the fact that Kona is - one, not her sister, two, she is two years younger than Konata, and three, probably smarter, even though she's a basement-dwelling fag because she keeps catching colds left, right and center.

Minami Iwasaki
Basically a loli Sakaki with green short hair and no tits. She doesn't talk much and keeps mostly to herself. The only person she interacts with is Yutaka, probably because she's the only character flatter than her.

Misao Kusakabe
The bastard child of Tomo and Kagura, and maybe Nanako Kuroi if you note the enhanced left canine. She is athletic, and like most athletes, she is also mentally retarded. She likes to play games, but like most of the noobs on the internet, is completely useless at them. She hates Konata for stealing her lover Kagami from her, and has since had to settle for second best in her babysitter and childhood friend, Ayano, and have been scissoring each other ever since.

Be warned, the first thing all weeaboos point out is that her English voice actress, Lara Jane Miller, also voiced Kari from Digimon.

Ayano Minegishi
Misao's ginger friend and babysitter with a fucking huge forehead. Both of them have been scissoring since she began to get used as a rebound by Misao, but she bakes a mean weed cookie.

Patricia Martin
A transfer student from the US who works at the same Cosplay Café as Konata. She is the perfect anime representation of a typical weeaboo faggot. She apparently learned her Japanese from anime and manga, which is why when she's saying hi, they think she's asking them if they're gay. Although, that in itself is still a valid question.

Her only purpose in the series is to give fucktarded weeaboos unrealistic expectations about being accepted in Japan.

Hiyori Tamura
Amateur doujin artist who doesn't shut up about her hobby, who develops a crush on both Minami and Yutaka and begins to draw them as her yuri fetish, especially at moments when they're interacting with each other, although she draws other shit ranging from guys getting it in the ass to cuntmunching lesbians.

Akira Kogami
Junior high student and self-proclaimed idol and captain of Lucky Channel, the three-minute bit that runs at the end of every episode. She almost always starts off every Lucky Channel segment diabetes-includingly cute and happy-go-lucky, then degenerates into a chain-smoking sadistic bitch after Minoru, her assistant, introduces himself, meaning that about 2 minutes of every episode are dedicated to Akira bitching her stupid yandere ass off about why she wasn't put in the show.

She's the anime embodiment of a forced meme, as she constantly begs the audience members to convince the staff to give her actual screen time, since fucking them for a part obviously didn't work.

Minoru Shiriashi
High school student in the same high school as Konata and her friends, appearing as "Sebastian" in the show; he is also the assistant on the Lucky Channel segment and he sang karaoke for the end credits of four episodes irl. Akira, who seems threatened by his very presence on the show, bitches at him constantly and treats him like shit. Eventually he snaps after she sends him into a dangerous hike into the mountains for some mineral water and destroys the set 2 episodes before the season finishes in an angry butthurt rage.

Minoru Shiraishi's voice actor is Minoru Shiraishi IRL, and it seems that he is waging war on Haruhiism.

Adults

File:Nanakonafapsession.jpg

Nanako and Konata get it on OL.

Soujiro Izumi
Like father like daughter., Soujiro is the basement-dwelling, lolicon-loving, incestuous-wanting otaku faggot, who Konata calls her dad. He is the Lucky Star equivalent of Kimura as far as his personality goes, and thus is a gigantic pedophile, even going so far as pining for his own daughter's arse. He has a hueg camera that he takes with him to local events so he can snap shots of titless Lolis and post them on the internets. He is responsible for Konata's possible gayness and infatuation with hentai pr0n, having read shitty yuri doujins to his daughter since she was 5.

Kanata Izumi
Soujiro's dead wife who is a ghost. She also looks about as young as her daughter, despite being at least 20 years old. When Soujiro and Kanata initiated the dance routine, it must have looked like awesome shit.

Yui Narumi
Konata's cousin. Despite being a police officer, she is a completely retarded blob of moe like the teenagers. Sometimes they even play dating sims, although this annoys Konata out of fear she's going to get Party vanned. Yui frequently comes to Konata's house shit-faced, and while drunk does stupid shit, like sliding around on some shitty Japanese chair. She has a husband, but he's nowhere to be found, so sometimes she bitches about that.

Nanako Kuroi
Homeroom and history teacher, and also a basement-dweller. She wastes her timeonline with Konata at night playing Warcraft and flicking her bead to webcam streams of her student's jailbait cunt on MSN. Yeah, srsly. She's single, and sometimes hits on Yui because she doesn't know the bitch is already taken.

The Hiiragi Family
Too many retards to name. Only ever seen during scenes where they're all sat at a table unsuccessfully answering the questions to quiz shows on TV, or seldomly interacting with Tsukasa and Kagumi individually.

Yukari Takara
Miyuki's mother, a stark contrast to her daughter.

Meito Anisawa
The dumb fuck who is hyperactive and a stereotypically overenthusiastic anime moron who spontaneously combusts whenever he gets excited. He works at the Animate store who sees Konata as "Legendary Girl A", who, with his 3 other accomplices, is always trying to sell Konata worthless anime shit and will stop at nothing to do so, bordering on rape in order to do it. But she never buys it, and whenever she doesn't they all act as though they've been defeated in som way or another. He appears once on the Lucky Channel, and no lulz were had.

Fanbase

To get a clear understanding of the amazing individuals that constitute the Lucky Star fanbase, just watch this video. WARNING:THIS VIDEO MAY CAUSE EXTREME LOSS OF BRAIN CELLS, DEAFNESS, AND LOSS OF FAITH IN HUMANITY.