HipForums

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It's long been a commonly known fact by now that many of the lower IQ denizens of the internet can frequently be found on Yahoo! Answers or on jewtube in the comments section sputtering away their functionally illiterate incoherence and idiocy at virtually any given time. But one particular location that still remains as somewhat of a hidden treasure trove of amusement for the interested and pertinent mind is Hipforums, an ugly, dated messageboard inhabited by hippies, stoners, neckbeards, white trash, classic rock faggots and several other congenital dumbfucks constantly prattling on about bongs, new age bullshit, the man, and even incest among other things. Thus, it is with my pleasure that I introduce to you one of the most boring, yet fucked up and dysfunctional corners of the internet. Practically every post has something to do with some nasty, obscene shit. There's even a chat room where you probably can't get past just saying hi. Everyone there contributes about zero thought to their posts.

Origins and basic guidelines

Remember those annoying "random" fucks from high school that constantly played hackeysack, wore hemp necklaces and knit beanies, listened to Bob Marley and Phish, idolized Bam Margera and talked about getting stoned all day? "Hear hear!" Exclaims the oldfag, hearkening back to his more youthful days of an ultimately failed existence. Maybe you were under the impression that they didn't ever use the internet aside from for looking for porn. Well, years ago when the digital revolution was gaining in momentum, they too found their own place on the interweb to call home. Thus, Hipforums was born.

Choosing a username is simple: Even today, adjectives such as "wasted" and "high" as well as nouns such as "peace", "beach", or "chick" are very popular, creating the impression that you're visiting a dated BBS forum from the 90's chock full of old people and 12 year olds rather than a site in 2012 populated by young adults. Since I'm sure you're eager to start posting, you should know the site is broken down into sub-forums ranging from a variety of different topics that you would expect for a site designed by hippies for hippies... and some that you might not expect. Each section of the site or sub-forum is lulzy in its own right, but we will briefly go through some of the highlights.

Politics

The politics sub-forum is, of course, one of the more amusing parts of the site depending on your personal tastes. It's a bit like Above Top Secret, but with less aliens and more Dave Matthews Band. Clueless degenerates and dropouts regularly utilize LOGIC AND REASON in a pathetic and desperate attempt to understand complex topics that simply rest far beyond the realms of their cerebral boundaries. Luckily for them, other members of the site seldom possess more than a double digit IQ at most, so they are rarely if ever exposed to the implacable and unforgiving truth that Bob Marley was not a genius, they are not "deep", and Michael Moore is both a hypocrite and a fraud. The views expressed here seldom make any sense whatsoever, which is to be expected seeing as how they're generally formulated in basements between bong hits. Just a few clear examples are as follows:

   
 
is it just me or do you also feel asthough we are witnessing the rise of modern monarchy in america? it seems like the few percentage of rich are getting rich and the large percentage of poor are getting poorer, soon i believe the rich will enforce the control they have and make the lower class pretty much be their peasants. i don't know what do you think
 

 
 

—ywarpeace, a hippy who thinks da rich will make us der peasantz. idk guyz what do u think?

In other words, the politics sub-forum can basically be summarized as "I'm against THE MAN...man..." Not surprisingly, there is also a related subforum dedicated to the mindless Occupy movement.

Love and Sex

 
This is actually pretty tame compared to most of the stuff you'll see there.

Hippies gather here at the love and sex sub-forum to discuss their sexual fantasies. You'll no doubt see some seriously sick shit here, and what separates this from the sick copypasta that you read on /b/ is mainly the fact that this shit is for real.

See also


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