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Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

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Does the Pope shit in the woods?
 

 
 

   
 
I'll have two number nine's, a number nine large, a number six with extra dip, a number seven, two number 45's, and a large soda.
 

 
 

(aka The Sims: Nigger Edition)


Rather than an actual GTA game, this is just an angst, nigger Tamagotchi. You play as a nigger called CJ who chickens out after one of his brothers got killed, then has his mom killed by a rival gang. Long story short, he eats fried chicken, fucks insane women, eats fried chicken, gets a pink Mohawk, eats fried chicken, blows up police cars with a M4, eat fried chicken, help Eazy E steal boxes from the National Guard and has hot coffee with Samuel Jackson, never actually becomes a rapper (but other people insist he did), and did we mention eat fried chicken (srsly)?

This game also contains the failed meme known as OG Loc, who is to CJ what Weegee is to Mario. He makes no sense, is kinda disturbing, and nobody cares about him. Copying Weegeee even further, you go-kart race Oriental gentleman Loc and near the end, CJ gets to shoot him, but instead he takes his rhyme book and his record company. Anyway, as the story develops, you go to Las Vegas, shoot some azns, rob a bank with some azns, get rich and beautiful, however your crackhead nigger wants to stay at the hood and C-Jay is forced to go back to his dump. The game ends when you CJ finally kills Biggie Smalls and Officer Tenpenny. That didn't solve anything though, because CJ's mom is still dead and everything is still fucked up.

Also, you can get fat and ride bicycles to Liberty City.

Those in search of a story will find that CJ is accused by two Jerkops for slaughtering another cop (which they actually killed, LOL), and he is there bitch for almost the whole game, until he kills almost fucking everyone.

Controversy

San Andreas generated a lot of lulz after a couple of 13 year old boys found ways to make the lead playa fuck his girlfriend. Rockstar fangirl Jack Thompson became wet at the possibility of new lawsuits over the game enabling events such as fapping over pixelated sex. Rockstar pwned the prick's ass in GTA IV; he gets shot in the head whilst screaming "Guns don't kill people, video games do!...BANG!"

Hilary Clinton soiled her panties after seeing this, pulled out her tampon, and called for jihad against Rockstar.

Quotes

   
 
I’ll have two number nines, a number nine large, a number nine large with extra dip, A number six large, Two number nines large, one with cheese with extra dip, A number six large, one with cheese, two number forty fives with extra dip, a number seven large, a number six, two number nines ones with cheese, and a large soda.


 


 
 

—Big Smoke

Videos


How big was Big Smoke's order


Jack Thompson being a little bitch


Big Smoke Calls McDonalds


Follow the damn train


How 2pac died lol


2pac - Changes

Gallery


Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
is part of Gaming on
Grand Theft Auto

[WASTEDSteal car]