Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Eurojank

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>GirlOnInternet at 15:36, 28 June 2021. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
Jump to navigationJump to search

Eurojank is a loosely-defined video game sub-genre that is generally classified as AA or budget titles that are extremely overambitious in scope and rife with game-breaking bugs and glitches. Most games that are classified as "Eurojank" are extremely over-complicated open world or non-linear action RPGs that are developed in third world hellholes such as Poland, Germany, Frogistan, and the Soviet Union.

Eurojank made by slavs is sometimes referred to as Slavclunk while Eurojank made by Americunts is referred to as Bethesda Softworks.



Identifying Eurojank

  • Is it 3D?
  • Are the graphics two or more console generations behind?
  • Is it a third-person action RPG or a first-person shooter with tacked on RPG elements like stat progression and perks?
  • Is the combat extremely clunky and/or obtuse?
  • Is it overly ambitious?
  • Is it open world or non-linear?
  • Do player choices actually have consequences?
  • Is the game hard as balls and does it avoid holding your hand?
  • If you wander a few feet away from the starting area will you be murdered by level 70 dinosaurs?
  • Is the end product a bug-filled mess?
  • Can the enemy A.I. or game mechanics be easily exploited to make the game far easier than intended?
  • Is there a day/night cycle?
  • Is it actually somewhat fun to play?
  • Does the voice-acting sound like it was done by homeless people who wanted to make a quick buck?
  • Does it have a shit-ton of stupid lore?
  • Is it based on a little known series of books by some obscure author that literally noone has heard of?
  • Was it made by an ED user?


If you answered "yes" to more than half of these questions, then you're probably playing Eurojank.

List of Eurojank

 
Two Worlds was marketed as an Oblivion-killer but ended up being one of the most hilariously broken games of all time.
  • CD Projekt Red
  • Larian Studios
    • Divinity II: Ego Draconis (2009)
  • TaleWorlds
    • Mount & Blade (2008)
    • Mount & Blade II: Bannerlord (2020)
  • Warhorse Studios
    • Kingdom Come: Deliverance (2018)
  • Spiders
    • Mars: War Logs (2013)
    • Bound by Flame (2014)
    • The Technomancer (2016)
    • GreedFall (2019)
    • SteelRising (TBA)
  • Reality Pump
    • Two Worlds (2007)
    • Two Worlds II (2010)
    • Raven's Cry (2015)
  • Techland
    • Dead Island (2011)
    • Dead Island: Riptide (2013)
    • Dying Light (2015)
    • Dying Light 2: Stay Human (2021)
  • Piranha Bytes
    • Gothic (2001)
    • Gothic 2 (2002)
    • Gothic 3 (2006)
    • Risen (2009)
    • Risen 2: Dark Waters (2012)
    • Risen 3: Titan Lords (2014)
    • Elex (2017)
    • Elex II (2021/2022)
  • Spellbound
    • ArcaniA: Gothic 4 (2010)
  • Streum On Studio
    • E.Ψ.Ǝ: Divine Cybermancy (2011)
  • Arkane
    • Arx Fatalis (2002)
    • Dark Messiah of Might and Magic (2006)
  • GSC Game World
    • S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl (2007)
    • S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Clear Sky (2008)
    • S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Call of Pripyat (2009)
    • S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 2: Heart of Chernobyl (2022)
  • 4A Games
    • Metro 2033 (2010)
    • Metro Last Light (2013)
    • Metro Exodus (2019)
  • The Farm 51
    • Chernobylite (2019)
  • Ice-Pick Lodge
    • Pathologic (2005)
    • Pathologic 2 (2019)
  • Media Art
    • Neuro Hunter (2005)
  • Deck13
    • The Surge (2017)
    • The Surge 2 (2019)
  • Black Forest Games
    • Fade to Silence (2019)
  • Systemic Reaction/Avalanche Studios
    • Generation Zero (2019)
  • Gremlin Interactive
    • Soulbringer (2000)
  • Delphine Software International
    • Darkstone: Evil Reigns (1999)

List of Yankjank

  • Troika
    • Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines (2004)
  • Otherside
    • Underworld Ascendant (2018)
  • Obsidian
    • Alpha Protocol (2010)
    • Fallout: New Vegas (2010)
    • The Outer Worlds (2019)
    • The Outer Worlds 2 (TBA)
    • Avowed (TBA)

List of Canajank

  • Compulsion Games
    • We Happy Few (2018)
  • Nine Dots
    • Outward (2019)

List of Japjank

 
FromSoftware is known for producing high-quality jank.
 
Nintendo's Metroid was made out of 100% jank.
  • FromSoftware
    • King's Field (1994)
    • King's Field II (1995)
    • King's Field III (1996)
    • Shadow Tower (1998)
    • Eternal Ring (2000)
    • King's Field IV (2001)
    • Shadow Tower: Abyss (2003)
  • Nintendo
    • Metroid (1986)
    • Kid Icarus (1986)
    • Zelda II: The Adventure of Link (1987)
  • SquareSoft
    • Parasite Eve (1998)
    • Parasite Eve II (1999)
    • Vagrant Story (2000)

List of Aussiejank

  • Beam Software
    • Shadowrun (1993)

List of Fur-o-jank

  • Experiment 101
    • Biomutant (2021)

List of Saudisuck

  • Moving Dimensions
    • Abo Khashem (2018)


See Also

 

Eurojank is part of a series on

Gaming

Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage.