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JD Vance
"JD Vance" redirects here. Perhaps you were looking for Weird?
Jorkin Depeanus Vance is a hillbilly hick and American senator who is literally living in OHIO lololol zomg!!!💀💀💀
Recently he has been a figure of interest in the American political sphere due to being nominated as the future vice president by God-King Emperor Donaldus I. Vance was originally a sternly never-Trump politician, even referring to Trump's America as Hitler's America once. Donald Trump took this as compliment and chose Vance to be his running mate, which of course Vance complied and immediately began ferociously sucking The Don's massive circumcised dong ever since.
So far in his vice presidential campaign, he has become most well known for calling Kamala Harris' supporters "childless cat ladies" who have "no stake in the future". Suddenly, a bunch of middle-aged women from Facebook and such who haven't had any dick since their teacher touched them in elementary school start to take up being a lonely media-shill with no purpose in life as a point of pride. He's also garnered controversy for perpetuating the idea that Haitians eat cats, which the cat ladies dismiss as racist because they're desperate for some black meat to eat their pussy cat.
Hillbilly Elegy
His memeoir that he wrote in 2016, Hillbilly Elegy, details much of his early life. Growing up, JD Vance was a lonely, lonely man. Throughout pages 179-181, Vance goes into grotesque detail of the secret, sexual para-relations he had out of desperation and frustration with an inside-out latex glove and his grandmother's living room couch cushions.
Other than that, his book also details his fatherlessness, his experiences with laying in bed smoking pot all day, the disgusting oral hygiene of the hillbilly race, latent homosexuality, his neurotic, whore mother, and his bad-shit insane, gun-toting, hermaphrodite grandmother.
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See also
- 2024 USA Presidential Elections
- Donald Trump
- Kamala Harris
- Mike Pence
- Millennial
- Objectophilia
- Tim Walz
- William Atchison - conversely, not a very big fan of couches
External links
JD Vance is part of a series on Donald Trump. You're gonna love this article, believe me. |