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Astablazia

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Astablazia, or Garna Gae, is a 47 year old internet tough guy chick guy and trailer trash bulldike who has recently become known for her intimidating camera presence, androgenous physical appearance, and tendency to react poorly to trolls on YouTube. She basically spends 23 hours a day with her 400lb, unemployed fat ass glued to her chair, having her children bring her platefuls of slop on the hour, and whining incessantly about oh-so-nasty text comments. She seems to have unrealistic expectations of the tubes and tends to draw attention to herself via long rants against her "haters" - or anyone whom makes fun of her personal life at all. A migrant from The Promised Land she left a shitstain of tl;dw videos on the tubes (most of which she's removed on both sites), half filled with lulzy FBI and death threats, the other half filled with flames against her trolls and cries of "You don't scare me!!1!".

THAT'S HAWT!

Moar astagayzia

 
Be afraid.
 
Attempting to have lipo with the oil rig.
 
:(
 
astablazia about to have lunch

astablazia originally posted a series of lulzy videos in reaction to some minor flame war no one gave a shit about, threatening to call the police and feds on her "haters". She decided the best course of action would be to go to YouTube and do the exact same thing. The following were just a few of them. Update: unsuprisingly, she soon disabled embeds on all her recent YouTube videos deleted everything. Oh sweet reality.

astablazia actually called Live Video about her haters... but couldn't get past customer service.

Serial Killer Penpals

astablazia posted a blog revealing a "relationship" she had with serial killer Aileen Wuornos (Yes, that Aileen Wuornos from the movie Monster).


Source

Reaction to Wikification

                    


Astablazia Drops Dox

 

astablazia today

While astablazia tried various methods to deal with her trolls, her angst was at an all time high and she provided plenty of lulz. Essentially, she was a product of the same stupidity that typifies all fucktarded internet lolcows (ie. Argent, Pixelbee, Redskull, etc.) and proceeded to resort to the same threat of lolsuits, getting the FBI to track down her trolls - basically every manner of typical ITG tact you can think of. She ended up deleting nearly everything on both sites and disappearing shortly after her article was posted and promptly returning to her glamorous life of surfing social networking sites for the nearest buzz-cutted, carpet-munching truck-driver.

   
 
You BETTER be afraid!
 

 
 

Oh noes

Quotes

   
 
Eat your own SHIT!
 

 
 

—astablazia, responding to her trolls, a Connoisseur of Scat

   
 
BITCH.... DONT COME TO MY PAGE AND START YOUR SHIT... BITCH... YOU GOT NOTHIGN NICE TO SAY, THEN KEEP YOUR FUCKIN MOUTH SHUT..... YOU GET BACK WHAT YOU GIVE.... PLAIN AND SIMPLE... FUCKIN GROW UP!
 

 
 

—astablazia, response to someone calling her fat

Trivia

  • From Odessa, Texas
  • Once killed someone scissoring.

Resources

External Links

See Also

 

Astablazia is part of a series on YouTube.

Visit the YouTube Portal
Astablazia

is part of a series on
THE PROMISED LAND

 

People

Argent009AskTheTyrantAstablaziaCavemanDenalynnnFaye006
KyhellMindWipeNotKatPencilLeadProductionsVictor1st

Live Video Departments

THE PROMISED LANDED Exodus into The Promised LandThe Promised Land/LulzvasionThe First Plague: FireThe Hatred StartsLive Video Police DepartmentStar Trek DweebsTL;DW

Key: * means user has closed their Live Video Channel