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Funnelgirl

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Funnelgirl was a meme started by vira among the Fishmongers. From there, it spread to weev and then to Jameth. It is a short video of a late middle-aged Japanese man restrained underneath a hospital commode from which a funnel leads to his mouth. A tiny Japanese spinner girl sits upon the chair and unloads a massive, earth-shattering shit into the guy's mouth. The consistency was a suspension few solids in a gallon or so of liquid. At the end when she is pushing the last of the solid shit into the guy's mouth you can tell it is nonconsenual as the poor Nip bastard is screaming safewords from his foul, shitstained mouth.

Jameth coined the term Funnelgirl after he renamed the video funnelgirl.wmv when posting it on his livejournal. He called it "quite possibly the most disgusting thing on the Internet" in a livejournal post. Even Jameth who has seen all the horrors of the Internet was unable to finish watching the video because the level of Internet horror was too high. This is because funnelgirl doesn't follow MFX Video's Golden Rule that "What goes down must come up."

If you fap to this, you are a sick fuck. No exceptions.

Tojo offered Hitler a Funnel Surprise when he visited Japan, and as a result, Hitler never returned to Japan after that experience. That is the real reason why Hitler shot himself.

girlyunderwear happened to be webcamming the first time she saw funnelgirl and there is a video floating around of her horrified facial expressions as she watched it.

Funnelgirl is proof alongside Guro and Lolicon that the Japanese deserved more than two nuclear bombs.

Comments

<genome> i decided it wouldnt be THAT bad to watch it.......
<genome> i threw up


<@Enstyne> that was lovely, i think i will show my mother.
<@Enstyne> she appreciates a good japanese documentary.


<+Gh0st_P> IIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM GGGGGGGGGGGOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG TO DDDDDDDDDDDDDDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
<+Gh0st_P> IM MY EYES ARE BURNING!!!!!!!!!!
<+Gh0st_P> Excuse me while i chuck

A Critique of FunnelGirl and its Implications on Modern Feminist Thought

The shock viral vid, “FunnelGirl”, is considered to be a feminist critique of the chauvinistic assumption that women – particularly of the Japanese lineage – are the submissive of the two genders.

“FunnelGirl” opens up with a Japanese man lying down; who just happens to have a transparent, plastic-tube lodged in his mouth leading from the bottom of a transparent toilet.

Traditionalists would likely take note that he seems “bound” to the floor, and that the tube-mask was forcibly placed over his mouth, but they are ignorant of Japanese sexual mores in which the absence of “consent” need not always be considered taboo.

Several seconds past the opening, the film’s protagonist, FunnelGirl, appears.

It is FunnelGirl’s strong belief that women can show themselves to be equal to if not superior to men, while voiding excrement.

A belief which she proceeds to demonstrate.

FunnelGirl seats herself on the transparent toilet, removes her knickers, and then proceeds to relieve herself of bodily wastes into the collection compartments of the transparent toilet – which just happen to lead into the aforementioned man’s mouth.

In this way, FunnelGirl is able to assert her position as a neo-Feminist, by causing the man beneath her to “eat shit.”

All the while, the man bounded below proceeds to intermittently sputter and gag.

This is to reaffirm his role as the film’s antagonist and all men’s discomfort with the rising status of women.

After about a minute of expressing her solidarity with feminism, FunnelGirl gets up from the transparent toilet while the man beneath gasps for air.

This symbolizes men’s mistaken belief that the feminist movement is short-lived.

FunnelGirl then obtains a Kleenex to clean her anal and genital regions of excess biomatter. Critics recognize this as FunnelGirl’s way of admitting, “the fight for equal rights can be a dirty business.”

FunnelGirl returns to the transparent toilet wielding the feminist equivalent of a lynchpin for social justice — a toilet brush.

While laughing to herself, she proceeds to use the brush to further force biomatter “down the hatch” and into the bounded-man’s mouth.

The man tries to resist and shake his head, but FunnelGirl continues to force down additional biomatter.

Very obviously, this represents the resistance amongst men to accept the changing ways of modern gender roles, while emphasizing the importance of “feminists not leaving their shit-half finished.”

FunnelGirl continues to press down the excess biomatter into the bounded man’s mouth, while the bounded man continues to struggle, as the video comes to its close.

Contrarians might point out, “DUDE?! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU!? THAT DIDN’T FUCKING HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH FEMINISM! IT WAS JUST A TWISTED FUCKING JAPANESE SCAT VIDEO!”

However, they fail to realize the necessary struggles of Modern Feminism. As such, in order to attain true sexual egalitarianism, FunnelGirl does a service by showing upcoming generations of feminists that, “it’s necessary to make men have our shit, while eating it too.”

And if being told by feminists, “to eat shit” is any indication, FunnelGirl has contributed marvelously.

See Also

External Links

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