Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

(aka The Sims: Nigger Edition)

Rather than an actual GTA game, this is just an angst, nigger Tamagotchi. You play as a nigger called CJ who chickens out after one of his brothers got killed, then has his mom killed by a rival gang. Long story short, he eats fried chicken, fucks insane women, eats fried chicken, gets a pink Mohawk, eats fried chicken, blows up police cars with a M4, eat fried chicken, help Eazy E steal boxes from the National Guard and has hot coffee with Samuel Jackson, never actually becomes a rapper (but other people insist he did), and did we mention eat fried chicken (srsly)?

This game also contains the failed meme known as OG Loc, who is to CJ what Weegee is to Mario. He makes no sense, is kinda disturbing, and nobody cares about him. Copying Weegeee even further, you go-kart race Oriental gentleman Loc and near the end, CJ gets to shoot him, but instead he takes his rhyme book and his record company. Anyway, as the story develops, you go to Las Vegas, shoot some azns, rob a bank with some azns, get rich and beautiful, however your crackhead nigger wants to stay at the hood and C-Jay is forced to go back to his dump. The game ends when you CJ finally kills Biggie Smalls and Officer Tenpenny. That didn't solve anything though, because CJ's mom is still dead and everything is still fucked up.

Also, you can get fat and ride bicycles to Liberty City.

Those in search of a story will find that CJ is accused by two Jerkops for slaughtering another cop (which they actually killed, LOL), and he is there bitch for almost the whole game, until he kills almost fucking everyone.

Controversy

San Andreas generated a lot of lulz after a couple of 13 year old boys found ways to make the lead playa fuck his girlfriend. Rockstar fangirl Jack Thompson became wet at the possibility of new lawsuits over the game enabling events such as fapping over pixelated sex. Rockstar pwned the prick's ass in GTA IV; he gets shot in the head whilst screaming "Guns don't kill people, video games do!...BANG!"

Hilary Clinton soiled her panties after seeing this, pulled out her tampon, and called for jihad against Rockstar.

Quotes

“   I’ll have two number nines, a number nine large, a number nine large with extra dip, A number six large, Two number nines large, one with cheese with extra dip, A number six large, one with cheese, two number forty fives with extra dip, a number seven large, a number six, two number nines ones with cheese, and a large soda.   „     —Big Smoke     “   Does the Pope shit in the woods?   „     —Carl     “   Yeah, can I fuck your sister?   „     —Dying words of a cuck narc (Pulaski)     “   Man, that's some good shit   „     —Big Smoke, embracing his crack ass junkie side like the druggie fuck he is deep down after being absent for most of the game     “   What the cock-a-doodle fuck?   „     —Many of people's reactions after this hogwash     “   Shit, glad I don't pay no taxes.   „     —Not even going there     “   I don't want a nightstick up the ass.   „     —CJ, being tough shit with the jerkops     “   Can I interest you in some religion?   „     —When you ask a Christian if they'd wanna play this fuck fest     “   Who let you out of the mental home?   „     —Also what a Christian would ask you if you offer them to play this Previous Quote | Next Quote

Videos

How big was Big Smoke's order Jack Thompson being a little bitch Big Smoke Calls McDonalds Follow the damn train How 2pac died lol 2pac - Changes Previous Video | Next Video

Gallery

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  Niggers love the white meat: from a much later take
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  Needless to say... Fap fap fap
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  Also, necrophilia is accepted
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  Taste the cock
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