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Revision as of 14:54, 14 July 2014

Ass-hat politician

Ron Kind is a Democratic politician representing the state of Wisconsin as a member of the Amerifag House of Representatives. He's had his ass there ever sins 1997. If you've ever heard of Wisconsin in your lifetime, you probably have a pretty good idea of what he's all about.

Ronny has voiced his support for both abortion and stem cell research, which will allow him to build an army of clones and dominate the world with mutated fetuses. After occupying the majority of North America, Republican theorists speculate that he might impose some sort of Nazi-Germany and Socialist fusion, being that he is a Democrat, and will force all of the young boys and girls to read Harry Potter to initiate them into the occult. Once the western world is under his control, it is assumed he will legalize marijuana, bring the banhammer down on jesus, sign homosexuality into law, and spend the rest of his regime watching old men fap in his chambers.


Voting Record

Some of the issues important to Rep. Kind are as follows:

genitalia

The Truth About Ron Kind

   
 
From its earliest days, stem cell research has been important to the people of Wisconsin.
 

 
 

— Unfortunately, the people of Wisconsin have never been important to anyone else

   
 
In a time of serious budget deficits, immense war costs and a sluggish economy, we cannot afford to grant such outlandish subsidies to some of our Nation's largest corporations.
 

 
 

— Ron Kind on needing moar money to study secks

   
 
Wisconsin is very proud of the career and technical college system that we have back home.
 

 
 

— Ron Kind on what people from Wisconsin can be proud of

   
 
Furthermore, I represent a rural district where agriculture plays an important role in the economy and the life of many of its citizens.
 

 
 

— Ron Kind has seen quite a few farms in his day

During the 2006 elections, Ron Kind was face with a new challenger: Paul R. Nelson. In a feat of pure lulz, Paul endorsed ads that accused Ron Kind of everything from studying prostitution and masturbating, to terrorists and WTC.

The actual study in question that the ad purports is about studying the sex lives of Vietnamese prostitutes, it fails to mention that the underlying intent of the study is to gain more information about the spread of AIDS. It should also be noted that Kind voted to keep funding the research by the National Institutes of Health, and had zero influence over the studies they chose to conduct. If nothing else, this only proves that he is a heretic because everyone knows god created AIDS to punish us all for the fags.

Oh and that part about the masturbating old men? That study was done in 1980. Entirely for the lulz.

Its fairly simple to glean the gist of the two videos in a couple of sentences: Ron Kind is a sick fuck who loves Mexico and hates you. But what kind of scathing adds was Ron firing back with?

That is what it takes to win an election in Wisconsin...

The results: The cheesefags chose handegg and prostitutes over batshit insane and fear. They'll regret it when he carries out his newest study: the effects of rape on Alzheimer patients.

Also see

Links

More lulz from Paul:


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