GayGamer: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 22:08, 26 April 2011

Do you like fiddling with joysticks? Do you like sound docking? Are you a faggot? Do you feel that the games industry is not gay friendly? If so, head on over to GayGamer.net for all your homosexual, bisexual and transsexual news on the world of gaming.

GayGamer

	“	For boys who like boys who like joysticks...And girls who like girls who like rumble packs!	„
	—GayGamer Tagline

GayGamer is the original incarnation of the website, hosting news on homosexuality in the gaming world. Typical news includes:

Gay innuendo that has been found in dialogue
Outrage over said gay innuendo
Pictures of hot male characters with their shirts off
News on gay mods for games
Stories completely unrelated to homosexual gaming

For example, this article criticises some fundie news site for denigrating Dragon Age: Origins for having,

“	a scene in which the two men are dirty, naked and kissing. They are depicted in various homosexual sex positions, and the clip concludes with the two nestling together and gazing into one another's eyes.	„
—World Net Daily on truth

In barely contained outrage, the article accuses her of not knowing what trolling is, being homophobic and being sensationalist. Homophobia in my conservative press? No.

Gay Gamer of the Week

The Gay Gamer of the Week is a great place for homosexual, basement-dwelling deviants to ogle gay men who play games (who'd have thought?). It regularly features prancing, twinkletoed nancyboys who enjoy games like "Cooking Mama" and "Lips".

Example:

Name: Kyle B.

Forum Name: longshot_dreams
Age: 26
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Gay, Straight or Bi: Gayer than Christmas.
Relationship Status: With my boyfriend for 3.5yrs.
Consoles you own: PS2, Xbox 360, PS3, PC, Super Nintendo, Nintendo, Sega Dreamcast, Sega Saturn.
Favourite Console: Xbox 360
Favorite Game Genre: RPG.
Games Currently Being Played: Batman: Arkham Asylum, Prince of Persia, Star Ocean: The Last Hope, Bioshock, Prototype, Soulcalibur IV, Lost Odyssey, Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne.
Top 5 Favorite Games: Final Fantasy VII, Lost Odyssey, Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne, X-Men: Children of the Atom, Xenogears.
Other Stuff About You: Hm... let's see. I'm a Visual Creative in NYC (that means I dress mannequins, style people, do window displays, etc) and I live with my boyfriend and our two kitties Ivory and Amos. In addition to fishing kittens out of the toilet bowl I like to talk on and on and on about video games even though I know most people stop listening after i say "video games". I would like to parlay my mannequin dressing into video game styling... but I don't think that exists... but a girl can dream, can't she? I have a giant flatscreen TV that I inherited from a friend and when I play games the characters are like, a foot tall. Sometimes right after I've played a game I act as though I am the character I was just playing as... even if I'm by myself. Eh... I may have shared too much. BYE!

Gamers Closet [sic]

This is the write-in section for Peter-puffing fairies to expose their deep dark secrets related to gaming. Such as this person who likes to make absolutely fabulous dollhouses of beautiful characters:

I'll admit it. I am one of the many addicted to character creation. I am also one of those who will lament over the avatar creation screen as much as skill trees or weaponry. He or she simply has to beautiful! Soul Calibur 4, Fallout 3, City of Heroes. There were times I would boot each game with the sole agenda of playing dress up with my "dollhouse" of creations.

Or this person who enjoys the game Princess Tomato in the Salad (tossing) Kingdom:

Back in the days of 8-bit and 16-bit gaming, I played a ridiculous amount of games. On weekends, my mom would take me down to the local rental store, and I would get to pick out one game to devour until Sunday evening. I remember looking at the wall of games with wide-eyed wonder. Which title should I pick? It better be a good one, ‘cause it would suck having to play a crappy game all weekend. That’s how I came across Princess Tomato in the Salad Kingdom. The title instantly grabbed my attention, and when I flipped the box over, I noticed that the game looked like it would play like Shadowgate and Deja Vu. I really loved those games, so I took it home one weekend, and was never the same.

Fan Art Gallery

Being an ED reader, you would have probably seen some terrible fan art in your time. Well fuck you, here's some more.

GayGamer Fan Art About missing Pics

Make it stop.
How to make your son gay...
Slashfic = Kill me
Aww cute! Wait a minute...

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

For some reason Zanzief is a gay gaming icon.
Srs bsns
You'll what? Oh...
Fap fap fap

Homotron

	“	For boys who like boys who like mandroids! And girls who like girls who like fembots!	„

Homotron is the electronics offshoot of GayGamer.net. Being called Homotron, one would expect it to be a site dedicated to covering news about donut-punching electrons, or faggot robots. Instead, as if there are not enough website carrying gigabytes of tech news, this one does too. Some selection on offer are:

What utterly glamorous and fabulous headlines. And not a mention of rug-munching or pillow-biting in sight. Note: This page has not been updated since April 20, 2009.

Use scrollbar to see the full image

PinkKyrptonite

	“	Pink Kryptonite? Oh Louis, you SO don't want to know	„

Finally, GayGamer offers a section that faggots will enjoy: Comics for sodomites. PinkKryptonite. One would think that as the internet offers so much for the homosexual, like fisting porn, child pornography, the pain series and advice on suicide, they would not need comics to satiate their wicked desires. You'd be wrong if you thought that.

Ellen Degeneres in Female Force

“	Whether she's on a prehistoric trip with Bill Nye at Disneyworld or encouraging her talk show visitors to break out and dance, it's good to see her get some recognition beyond her sense of humor.	„

In the past, Female Force comic have featured such prestigious cumdumpsters as Sarah Palin and Barbarah Walters. Now, they can add the carpet-chewing, unfunny Ellen. Includes illustrated version of Dancing Degeneres.

Achilles is Absolutely Gay

“	The Achilles of Greek myth is famous for laying down with his cousin Patroclus; Does this inclination matter when it's translated to DC universe?	„

According to Gail Simmone, writer of Wonder Woman, the character Achilles from Warkiller is gay. The Give-A-Shit-O-Meter still sits at 0/10.

Rick Worley's A Waste of Time

“	He's got some solid art to back his writing, his inks come off like a crosshatching Jhonen Vasquez or a cartoony R. Crumb.	„
—PinkKryptonite on lolwut

PinkKryptonite featured an artist called Rick Worley who authors the comic A Waste of Time, featuring an alcoholic, gay, promiscuous rabbit (aren't they all, amirite?), which he turns in "filthy, filthy, comedy gold". While you or me might call the art, "shit done in black and white with a pencil", PinkKrptonite calls it "solid art".

PopSucker

	“	For boys who like boys who like things! And girls who like girls who like stuff!	„

Here is finally something the homosexuals do best. Gossiping about and controlling American pop-culture. Like a bunch of rich white women in a hair salon, this is like sitting in the QueerSpace at your University, only rather than listening to a bunch of twinks talk about how many miles of cock they sucked, this like listening to a bunch of nerds talk about how many miles of cock they've taken up their manpleaser.

	“	There have been a few videos of musical flash mobs recently, but this one may be my favorite. One of Australia's most famous drag queens, Joyce Maynge, joins forces with a flash mob of hot aussies to create a enormous scene on Bondi Beach!	„
	—PopSucker on Flashmobbing

	“	The holidays should be full of joy, and nothing brings me more joy than The Muppets. So with that in mind, here's a happy little tune to send you into your holiday vacation, The Muppets doing Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody." It is made of 100% win.	„
	—PopSucker on failing

	“	This video seems to have been around for quite some time, so I'm not sure how I never heard of it, but mucho thanks to my pals for introducing me to Traci. She's going to get her man Peter back from some skank by driving to the park to find him. Luckily, she's got her fabulous new "huur" that she dyed with Kool Aid to seduce him away. Oh, and her push-up bra. Traci's awesome. I'm pretty sure this is a joke, though. At least, I hope it is! Still funny, either way!	„
	—PopSucker on sounding like queens

	“	I think even in the seventies, this tag would have been kind of unusual. But I promise you it's not the strangest thing you'll find when you look at the full ad after the jump. Of course, don't be making the jump thinking you're going to be seeing Olympian athletes of guys in togas or anything. It was the seventies, after all. You're going to see some of the snazziest polyester ware you've ever seen! Don't be scared!	„
	—Fuck this shit I'm outta here.

	“	I stumbled upon these delicious pieces of artwork and simply had to share with you all. An incredibly talented artist has done some sexed-up renderings of Disney's princes and male hunks that simply have to be seen to be believed. Two of my favorites are above — I don't really remember Lilo & Stitch that well, but if David looked like this in it, I'm sure it would never leave my DVD player! And who wouldn't have enjoyed Milo in Atlantis more if he had been wearing a Speedo throughout? Click on over here to see the whole lot!	„
	—FAGGOTS

Previous Quote | Next Quote

VelvetDiceBag

	“	For boys who like boys who like longswords! And girls who like girls who like breastplates!	„

Finally, we come to the epitome of nerddom - tabletop games. In case sitting around a table with a plastic army, drinking Mountain Dew and arguing over how many centimetres your Assault Marine can jump isn't gay enough, VelvetDiceBag has you covered. This shit isn't even worth covering, as it's about tabletop games and conventions.

External Links

GayGamer is part of a series on

Homosexual Deviants

Visit the Faggotry Portal for complete coverage.

GayGamer is part of a series on

Gaming

Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage.

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-Do you like fiddling with joysticks? Do you like [[sounddocking]]? Are you a ''faggot''? Do you feel that the games industry is not gay friendly? If so, head on over to '''GayGamer.net''' for all your homosexual, bisexual and transsexual news on the world of gaming.
+Do you like fiddling with joysticks? Do you like [[sound docking]]? Are you a ''faggot''? Do you feel that the games industry is not gay friendly? If so, head on over to '''GayGamer.net''' for all your homosexual, bisexual and transsexual news on the world of gaming.
 ==GayGamer==

GayGamer: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 22:08, 26 April 2011

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