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Jonathan Swift: Difference between revisions
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P.S. Here's a good recipe that can be used for cooking delicious Irish babies. (http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-live/roast-suckling-pig-recipe/index.html) (Obviously most Irish babies weigh less than 15 pounds due to foetal alcohol syndrome, so adjust recipe accordingly.) | P.S. Here's a good recipe that can be used for cooking delicious Irish babies. (http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-live/roast-suckling-pig-recipe/index.html) (Obviously most Irish babies weigh less than 15 pounds due to foetal alcohol syndrome, so adjust recipe accordingly.) | ||
[[Category:People|Swift,Jonathan]] | |||
Latest revision as of 20:39, 31 October 2011
Jonathan Swift was an unfunny author of many shitty books and a renowned IRL Troll from Ireland.
Biography
Jonathan Swift, son to an English mother, was born a pampered, rich and beautiful aristocrat. He owned several farms in the fields outside Dublin and spent most of his childhood writing angsty stories, sucking potato juice, and molesting cattle. After attending college, Swift went to England to become a politician but was soon labeled a pedophile after he was caught sleeping with an 8 year old girl named Stella. Ostracized from society, Swift and Stella quickly fled back to Ireland.
Swift subsequently got a high position in the Irish government and spent the next 50 years smoking pot and getting high on LSD. He wrote many books about going on these acid trips, visitng the land of midgets, the land of giants, the magical island of La Puta (see Spanish), and a kingdom of intellectual horses.
In his later life, Swift became a limousine liberal and got involved with criticizing the British for their unfair treatment of Irish peasants. The British, in an attempt to get rid of him, invited him to a banquet and offered him a large plate of cyanide pills, telling him that they were "biscuits". Swift, like the drugged lardass he was, voraciously ate them all and immediately died. Because of this, he is considered to be the greatest Irish hero in history EVAR!!!
Famous Books by Jonathan Swift
- A Tale of a Tubby
- Jimbo's Travels
- A Modest Proposal
Fucking Irish coward
I don't see why this is satire [1]. Articles on Jews and Rape are much more satiricalness. Swift's article just states the obvious and therefore lacking in lulz.
P.S. Here's a good recipe that can be used for cooking delicious Irish babies. (http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-live/roast-suckling-pig-recipe/index.html) (Obviously most Irish babies weigh less than 15 pounds due to foetal alcohol syndrome, so adjust recipe accordingly.)