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Jack Kevorkian: Difference between revisions

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[[image:KevorkianGift.jpg|thumb|[[final solution|Good for one visit.]]]]
 
Dr. Jack Kevorkian was doubtlessly the greatest [[idol]] that [[old people]] and [[An hero|heroic individuals]] have ever known. His tireless and [[expert]] [[crime|circumvention of]] [[law]], combined with his wholesale [[dedication]] to the swift termination of human flesh, resulted in the early expiration of 130 broken husks of what may have at one point been [[people]]. He bore the burden of executing a task which most could only [[envy]]: scourging the earth of [[HIV|dried up]], [[herpes|dilapidated]], broken, [[obamacare|Medicare]] leeching "people." A (perhaps unintended) consequence of his bold slaying of bedridden losers was a significant reduction in the occurrences of angry shouts of "''CALL YOUR GRANDMOTHER!''"
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Dr. Kevorkian is quite possibly the greatest [[IRL]] [[troll]] of the Supreme Courts. His [[epic]] [[lie|win]] resulted in the [[murder|liberation]] of 130 [[retards|people]], in what many claim to be the greatest opportunity of all time: a chance to do [[your mom]] a favor, and end your [[furfag|respectable]], [[basement_dwelling|noteworthy]], [[emo|joyous]]and [[pedo|proper]] life in the [[kill it with fire|safest and most humane way possible]] 


[[Image:jackkevorkian.jpg|thumb|He sure is a looker!]]
[[Image:jackkevorkian.jpg|thumb|He sure is a looker!]]
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[[Image:0_61_kevorkian_jack.jpg|thumb|..Now, is it just me, or does he look an awful lot like Mister Rogers here?]]
[[Image:0_61_kevorkian_jack.jpg|thumb|..Now, is it just me, or does he look an awful lot like Mister Rogers here?]]


Ever since he has been imprisoned, the number of [[Emos]] and [[Goths]] living in the [[USA]] has risen by 3 times. If only Dr. Kevorkian could help spread his love to all [[Emos]] and rid them of their emotional pain! 
Ever since he died, the number of [[Emos]] and [[Goths]] living in the [[USA]] has risen in triplicate, perhaps in mourning of their fallen god. They'd be a lot less sad if they knew that Dr. Kevorkian, Esquire, did not accept unstable tweens as clients.


Dr. Kevorkian's methods can be used to cure [[ETD|many common ailments]] such as:
Dr. Kevorkian's methods can be used to cure [[ETD|many common ailments]] such as:


* [[Living]]
* [[Life]]
* [[Emo]]
* [[Emo]]
* [[Attention whore]]ism
* [[Attention whore]]ism
* This shitty article
* This shitty article
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== Related Articles ==
== Related Articles ==
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== External Links ==
== External Links ==
[[http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18974940/ns/health-health_care He is out of prison.]]
*[http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18974940/ns/health-health_care He is out of prison.]
*[http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/04/us/04kevorkian.html He is dead.]


{{trolls}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:People]]

Revision as of 15:28, 15 November 2016

Good for one visit.

Dr. Jack Kevorkian was doubtlessly the greatest idol that old people and heroic individuals have ever known. His tireless and expert circumvention of law, combined with his wholesale dedication to the swift termination of human flesh, resulted in the early expiration of 130 broken husks of what may have at one point been people. He bore the burden of executing a task which most could only envy: scourging the earth of dried up, dilapidated, broken, Medicare leeching "people." A (perhaps unintended) consequence of his bold slaying of bedridden losers was a significant reduction in the occurrences of angry shouts of "CALL YOUR GRANDMOTHER!"

He sure is a looker!
..Now, is it just me, or does he look an awful lot like Mister Rogers here?

Ever since he died, the number of Emos and Goths living in the USA has risen in triplicate, perhaps in mourning of their fallen god. They'd be a lot less sad if they knew that Dr. Kevorkian, Esquire, did not accept unstable tweens as clients.

Dr. Kevorkian's methods can be used to cure many common ailments such as:

Related Articles

External Links

Jack Kevorkian is part of a series on

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