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=== Main Plot === | === Main Plot === | ||
[[File:Berserkhiatus.jpg|200px|thumb|right|One chapter a year]] | [[File:Berserkhiatus.jpg|200px|thumb|right|One chapter a year]] | ||
[[File: | [[File:Berserk-idol-game.jpg|200px|thumb|right|the true villian of the Berserk universe]] | ||
[[File:Beserkending.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Leaked ending of Berserk]] | [[File:Beserkending.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Leaked ending of Berserk]] | ||
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In February 2017, KOEI Tecmo release another shitty Musou type of game under the Berserk franchise titled '''Berserk and the Band of the Hawk'''. Unlike all the other Musou ripoffs, this one kept the elements of what Berserk is. Wait until the price greatly drops if you're into Musou games. For now it's only worth renting it. | In February 2017, KOEI Tecmo release another shitty Musou type of game under the Berserk franchise titled '''Berserk and the Band of the Hawk'''. Unlike all the other Musou ripoffs, this one kept the elements of what Berserk is. Wait until the price greatly drops if you're into Musou games. For now it's only worth renting it. | ||
[[File:Koei-techmo-is-working-on-a-new-berserk-game-3.jpg|thumb]] | [[File:Koei-techmo-is-working-on-a-new-berserk-game-3.jpg|thumb]] | ||
[[File: | [[File:Berserk and the Band of the Hawk Cover.jpeg|thumb]] <youtube>1siqO1LAaRQ</youtube> | ||
== The Memes == | == The Memes == | ||
Latest revision as of 20:15, 13 August 2024
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MIURA IS FUCKING DEAD LMAO |
- Not to be confused with Berserker.
It's no secret that the giant sword trope is pretty famous among video games and anime. Who is to blame for this faggotry? What started the whole giant sword trend? Bleach? Final Fantasy? Nope! The series that started the generic odd over-comming bad ass anime swordsman hero who is cold, apathetic, have arch nemisis of questionable sexual orientation but also has a troubled past/backstory so please no bully is a manga series known as Berserk.
Berserk is an on-going Japanese fantasy manga series written by Kentaro Miura in 1989 which started as a one shot prototype manga in 1988 and it's also the most hardcore manga ever (it's even published in a dirty magazine called Young Animal). While it may be patient zero for all the stereotypical fagottry infesting anime to this day, Berserk is different because it takes place in medieval Europe that becomes hell on earth and takes over 100 chapters to get to the supernatural demon stuff because it's too focused on Game of Thrones style battles and plots. While it suffers from the handicap of its creator being an Azn Berserk has everything! From gore, to fighting, to demons, to Lovecraftian nightmares, to rape, to pedophilia, to gay sex, to child murder, to chibi cutesy jokes, etc. and is generally considered to be Awwright even if the fanbase are insufferable faggots.
Plot & Arcs
Main Plot
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Berserk has no real plot. Any good stories, depth, themes and meaning is entirely coincidental as Berserk is an excuse for Kentaro Miura to draw fucked up stuff, and even Kentaro Miura thinks his own story is shit and will do things like disregard entire chapters he has already published like chapter 83 where you meet God and learn God was created by man as a reason to explain the worlds suffering. Miura also likes to make lots of open threads and then close them as edgy as he can, however halfway through the series he realized how gay being an edge lord is, but is trapted into a dark edgy story because of how he started the whole story. Berserk now schizophrenicly switches tone between comic cutesy antics and sick fuck Awwright story.
It’s unknown if Guts and his rotating gang of rejects will survive since A SINGLE CHAPTER COMES OUT EVERY YEAR because Muira can't stop jerking off to Idol Master. Since this Manga has been going since last thursday there is a massive 30 year backlog
The Blacked Swordsman Arc
Berserk decides to open the story right in the fucking middle of the story with a Garbage story that even Miura admits he wrote not knowing where the hell it would go and he was just trying to be edgy and cool. Eventually Miura redeems this by Retconning the entire series with the Golden Age Arc, giving explaination and depth to his main character's unlikable shitty attitude.
Guts busts in a tavern kills some niggas and tells everyone he's here to kill the Demon apostle that rules the city. People in the city fear the ruler because he is a theocrat that accuses everyone of witchcraft and constantly seeks to kill heretics. Guts frees a fairy names Puck who won't leave Guts alone no matter how many times Guts swatts him away and calls him an annoying bug. Puck tries to convince Guts he's cool by showing fairy's can heal wounds, but Guts is too edgy and cool to have feelings or attach to anyone. Guts tortures a snake Demon to find out where the Apostle Demon Ruler is at. Puck leaves because Guts hurts his feelings and gets captured and given to the demon rulers daughter as a gift. Guts gets into a massive anime sword battle with Apostle demon battle. In the destruction Demon rulers daughter and puck end up falling in the battle area. Guts uses Demon Rulers daughter as a hostage, wins the battle (even though every limb he has is broken), but Demon Apostle fag isn't done yet.
We're introduced to the Behelet. They are magic eggs that open a portal to hell and summon the Godhand, which are 5 MEGA ULTIMATE DELUXE SUPER SAYAN demons who will make you a pretty Awwright demon if you give them a sacrafice. Demon nigger tries to sacrafice Guts, but it doesn't work because a sacrafice has to be worth something to the person sacrificing it. The only thing of value that nigga has is his daughter (who never knew he was a demon and was shocked when she learned). Guts is on the ground as a mangle broken mess trying to kill the Godhand niggers. The Godhand tell demon nigger if they don't give him the daughter, they will take him and remind him he's sacraficed loved ones before. The daughter asks the Godhand what they mean by this to where they recount how Demon Nigger became a Demon Apostle in the first place. She learns the story of how her mom died is a lie, and her father sacraficed her because he caught the slut in a demon orgy. He dedicated his life to exterminating that religion under false pretenses when in reality he was just jelly they gave his bitch the good dicking he never could. Demon nigger is too weak and ashamed to sacrafice daughter, Godhand take demon nigger, and Miura realized his main character was shit and nothing made sense so he better go back in time in his story and give a back story to make this less shit.
The Golden Age arc/Eclipse
How do you fix the problem of starting a story with a shit unlikable character with zero depth, but cool artwork? In true Japanese form, you overcompensate for those short comings. How bad is Miura compensating? The Golden Age Arc is considered one of the greatest and most tragic Arcs told in all of Eastern literature, so it's assumed Miura would of just became An hero if this didn't work out.
Guts (or Gattsu if your translation is retarded)is re-introduced as an emo mercenary who carries a giant sword and 1v1 some legendary knight for extra money. This kills morale for the enemy army and winning the battle. Guts also established he hates being touched. While walking home alone some mercenaries for the enemy army decide they wanna rob the emo fag and ask their leader Griffith for permission. Griffith says "nigga I don't give a fuck", so a hand full of guys try and swarm him, but get rekt cause he's an anime swordsman. After killing a bunch of those niggas Griffith is impressed and tries to talk to Guts. Guts isn't exactly happy about getting ambushes and tells Griffith "1v1 me scrub!" Griffith does, and no scopes Guts in under a second with one move. Griffith takes in Guts to camp to heal him and tries to convince Guts to be his right- hand man in a totally not gay way. Guts is still ass blasted by his 1v1 loss, so they rematch where if Guts loses Griffith can make him his "fagboy" (yes, that is literally said) Griffith wins again, but wants to convince everyone he's totally not gay so he just makes Guts one of his soldiers. Casca is a bitch to Guts cause she can tell Griffith wants that ass and it makes her jelly.
We get 3 years of battlefeild glory stories ending some 100 year war and raising everyone to nobility classes. In this time we learn the backstories off all the characters through flash backs and exposition. Why is Guts named Guts? Cause he fell out of his dead mothers hung corpse and was named after what he looked like. Why does Guts use an oversized sword? He's had to use comically oversized swords since he was 4 cause mercenaries don't keep baby swords. How is he such a good fighter? The leader/father figure type forced him to earn his keep in a merc company and beat the shit out of him everyday till he GIT GUD. Why doesn't Guts like to be touched? Because he has only had 1 true love his entire life, an older man named Donavan who dicked him good at the age of 6, and everyone elses touch only reminds him of the loss of his lover.
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We also learn Casca worships Griffith cause she was almost raped by some noble but Griffith cock blocked the moment by tossing Casca a sword and letting her play soldier. Also Griffith did gay stuff for money but is totally not gay cause he totally didn't like it and only did it to pay his troops to further his dream of one day having his own kingdom (he even has a crimson Behelet called the egg of the king he got from a street vendor as a kid so he is totally not gay and is just doing this to be king... right?)
Guts decides to leave the Band of the Hawk in order for to gain the love and respect of Griffith cause he overhears that Griffith can't respect someone who can't follow their own dreams. Griffith gets pissed over Guts trying to leave him, and they have a totally not gay Mexican stand off with swords, before the fight ends in one move with Guts winning. Griffith cries in a totally not gay way about losing his boy toy. To prove he's not gay, he sneaks in the king's daughters room and starts having hot sex with the King's daughter, Charlotte, but he still ends up thinking about Guts. Griffith gets caught by a cock blocking chamber maid was then tortured for a whole year because the king of Midland wanted to bust that cherry first. The king sends all his armies to kill off The Band of the Hawk and almost succeeds because Casca is now highest ranking comander in charge since Guts and Griffith are gone and women are shit at everything. Casca has The Band of the Hawk run and hide for a year cause she is a shit leader due to being a woman, and right as it looks like Midgar is finally ready to kill off the remaining Band of the Hawk, Guts comes back and saves everyone. Casca and Guts have sex (where Guts has flashbacks of his first true love, Donavan) and they are more or less kinda sorta a couple. Guts hears about Griffiths totally not gay crimes, and decides to save Griffith. Missing all of his skin, fingernails, tendons, tongue, and dick, Griffith gets rescued by Guts because Guts couldn't figure out a dream other than swinging his comically oversized sword and was gonna come crawling back to the man he offered to be a "fagboy" for. When they find out Griffith is useless and will never get better Griffith almost becomes an hero and accidentally summoned the Godhand. This starts an event alluded to from the begining warned about known as the eclipse.
Griffith agrees to sacrifice the entirety of the supporting cast you've grown to like the Band of the Hawk and becomes a edgy, discount Batman. Each character dies in a more gruesome and fucked way then the last until Guts and Casca are the only 2 left standing. Griffith decides to take a time out from Eclipse party time try out some new kink he just got into,Cuckolding.
Griffith has tentacles hold Cacsa in place so he can take her to pound town on a fuck truck while Guts is pinned down to a pool of his friends' blood. Guts is enraged by this passionate love making (because he wanted that dick) so he cuts of his own arm to run over there and cock block! However, like any good house party, cock blocking is prohibited so giant demons hold down Guts and he struggles around so much he pokes out an eye. Guts cries like a bitch and Griffith cums.
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After all of that, a "mysterious" Ghost Rider knock-off bursts through the sun and saves Guts and Casca. Guts then gets a huge fucking sword and devotes his entire life to murdering Griffith painfully and brutally as possible, all because he got cucked. Casca was dicked so good by Griffith she is left with the brain power of a potato, meaning he literally fucked her brains out. Until Casca gets her mental shit together she is constantly get him Guts danger as he's now pretty much the baby sitter of Griffiths left overs and she doesn't want Guts to touch her after getting that good Griffith Dick. This makes our emo black swordsman the biggest cuck in Japanese fiction as he watched the man he loved fuck the chick he loved and is taking care of the slut after with no hope of ever banging her or him again. On top of this Guts now has a visible brand on his neck that bleeds around demons that lets everyone know he is a cuck.
The Lost Children Arc
We pop back into the current timeline. Lost Childen is a Cool story but does nothing to progress the story and exists because Muria wanted to draw some loli sluts.
Guts is on the hunt to kill all the monsters because he blames them for making him a cuck. He wanders into a village that hates fairies with Puck, who is a fairy. They think fairies are evil beings that steal kids and murder towns, and nothing Puck says will convince them otherwise. The whole town is ready to do a good ol' fashion lynching but then a swarm of fairies starts attacking the town shooting through the townsfolk like bullets. Guts starts anime sword fighting them, and realized these fairies aren't fairies... They are demons cause they make his demon senses tingle. Guts 1v1 the fairy queen which ends with all of the fairies retreating. Once the dust settles all the dead fairies turn into the corpses of missing children, pissing off the town.
Guts goes to hide and Random Anime child #731 realized Guts did nothing wrong. She feeds and hides him, but is kidnapped by the fairy queen. Turns out the fairy queen is Random Anime child #731 long lost friend who ran away. Turns out Random Anime child #731 was abused (like all the children in this shit small town) and one day found a Behelet, and was beaten close to death so it activated. She sacrificed her mom and dad to become a fairy queen and started kidnapping kids to make them fairies too. The Kids stay kids forever. They also kill and rape each other in war games for fun because they had perfectly healthy upbringings that taught them this was normal behavior.
Guts saves Random Anime child #731 and genocides the fairies. Right after doing this Guts is confronted by The Holy See army who think he is a heretic monster based on misinterperted stories they have heard. They capture Guts alive and the conviction arc starts.
Conviction arc
Muira decided to finally move the story along, tries to repeat the same idea but midway realizes that doing that is kinda gay so he just throws a bunch of mystery plot holes all over the place to fill in with stuff later. For this arc Muira just wanted to draw a bunch of sacrilegious shit and orgies.
Guts is prisoner of the Holy See army lead by Farnese. You already know this religion is shit because they let a woman be in charge of anything, but its made very clear through out that Farnese was a diversity hire only put in charge because traditionally the Holy See has always celebrated diversity in the workplace. Farnese whips Guts, Guts talks a bunch of sacraligious shit about how God and Demons are the same and how Farnese needs to get a fedora and read more Carl Sagan. Farnese gets butthurt and has Guts put back in a cell. Guts escapes cause he's the original generic anime swordsman, and sneaks to Farnese's tent where his equipment is being held. Guts sees Farnese whipping herself topless, because in the middle ages cutting wasn't trendy yet. Guts knocks her out and takes her hostage to escape on horseback. As they ride a demon hoard drawn to the Bluetooth brand on Guts comes out and chases them along side the Holy See and even starts attacking the Holy See army as well. Since the Holy See army is busy fighting demons Guts figures "awww what the hell, I'll kill demons to" pulls over on his horse and Anime Swordsman fights demons that are posessing local wildlife.
Guts tells Farnese GTFO despite her tits being on display. Farnese gets to the horse and tells the horse "I need to mount you" the horse responds "Nawwwww bitch, this time I'm gonna mount you." As the possessed rape horse gets ready to give Farnese a good dicking, Guts sees this and is reminded of how he was cucked by Casca and Griffith and refused to be made a cuck again. He kills the horse, but Farnese gets possessed and becomes a cock hungry slut and is just about to rape Guts, but the sun comes up, the demons go home and Farnese's man servent Serpico show up to cock block Guts and take the his boss back to diversity hire HQ so she can give a rousing speech about how men should just not rape and how she is a powerful strong independent woman who don't need no man.
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Guts goes back to the hole in the ground he left Casca in, and finds out from the two kids who were watching her that she left because kids are useless and not paid mental health professionals. Guts is freaking out looking for her cause he had a dream Casca was gonna get burned at the steak and become a baked potato. Guts leaves to the holy city of Albion cause Skull Knight stops by and says some shit about her being there, and someone is gonna try and make THE ECLIPSE 2!
Meanwhile Farnese heads back with the Holy See army to Albion as well to give a diversity and earning report to Father Mozgus. Mozgus looks like he was dropped on his face too many times as a kid, and has freak show weirdos guarding him 24/7. We find out later the reason Mozgus looks like that is cause he drops himself on his head repeatedly to pray and he's a huge religion fag. The town of Albion is poor as shit and peasants are burned and accused of being witches all the time. Some people try and avoid being burned alive by going to Father Mozgus's atonment-a-torium to pay for their sins via BDSM. We find out Farnese is a sick fuck who gets off and touches herself to torturing people because it makes her feel powerful and like she's a strong independent woman. We learn that Casca has been hanging out with a crew of literal whores. This isn't surprising given what Casca did during the eclipse, but no one wants to fuck a tard so the prostitutes wrapped her in bandages and told everyone she had Super AIDS. Oh the whores are also in the same sex cult from the Blacked Swordsman arc. There is an orgy is a side story where one of the whores tries to convince her client to join via whore magic and he runs scared after kissing Baphomets snake cock, to snitch but he gets pushed off a cliff by the cultists. Later on they get accused of being witches anyways but only Casca gets arrested because Casca is a retard.
Guts finds out from the whores that Casca is arrested and Guts goes all generic anime sword hero and starts fucking shit up. They save some runt kid named Isidro from a Muslim rape gang along the way too and Farnese is having doubts about her faith. Guts fights Mozgus and his crew of freaks (cause they demons and shit) and the town starts going bat shit crazy with destruction and all sorts of shit but no one is sure why. Refugies think its a prophecy and Guts is the devil and Mozgus is a Holy Angel, in reality there was a hidden Apostle called "the egg of the perfect world". The TL;DR is he was thrown away as a baby, lived in a gutter, had no one, came across a Behelet, and when he died from bodies being stacked on him he could only offer himself as a sacrafice to the Godhand as he was the only thing that mattered to himself. He wished to make a perfect world so he became a Behelet himself and wished a mock eclipse. He also eats Casca Weird demon kinda sorta there rape baby but no one understand WTF is going on with that weird shit.
Guts wins, the runty kid saves Casca last minute from burning at the Steak only to have her kidnapped by the whore's sex cult buddies because they believe she is a god cause her bluetooth brand gets demonic reception. They are gonna make her fuck the goat god but Guts shows up and rages because if he can't get his dick wet, no one can. Guts thanks the whores for taking care of her even though their sex cult friends almost rapedher. The runty kid and Farnese follow Guts as the kid is a fag and Farnese finally got a fedora and watched Cosmos and no longer thinks God is cool. Her man servent Serpico (who is also her secret half brother, and has wincest thoughts about her but keeps it in check because he sees himself as her protector) also comes along. They all go back to the cave they came from.
Also Griffith is back as a human now and is gonna build his kingdom.
The end?
Miura is dead, And this fucking shitshow of shitshows is a fucking million miles away from the word "almost finished" alone, So what will happen? Is this the end? Is the manga cancelled? Will we ever see Guts and Griffith settling all of their problems For great justice via the Manliest way possible?? Nobody will ever fucking know, Just pray that Miura had at least wroten some idea for the ending or concept, So who ever the fuck in charge of the manga can just finish it, once and for all.
Characters
- Guts: Also known as the Blacked Swordsman because of his relationship with Donovan. He wields a giant sword and kills demons every single night,. Some argue he's the most hardcore protagonist in all of animu. He does a bunch of hard core shit like being born from his mother's corpse, taking black dick as a child, getting stabbed through the face, and jumping into the mouth of a giant sea god and killed it from inside... but he does this to over compensate for being the biggest cuck in manga. Is it impressive after all of that he STILL FUCKING SURVIVES?! Sorta, then you remember he cried like a bitch while a faggot came in his bitch and made her a Potato.
- Donavan: Considered the only true love Guts has ever known he paid Gambino 3 silver coins to turn Guts from a swords-boy to a swords-MAN! Guts accidentally killed him during a lovers quarrel because he thought that Donavan told him a lie about his "father", but would later learn this lie was the truth and forever be haunted by losing the only person who he ever truly loved to youthful emotional acting out.
- Gambino: Found guts under his moms corpse still alive and let his favorite whore keep him as a pet since she had a miscarriage. He was also the leader of the Mercenary group that took in Guts, and all around a pretty cool guy. Guts killed him by accident.
- Griffith: The saltiest faggot ever written in literature. He snuck into princess Charlotte’s room for a one-night stand because his boy toy left him, only to get his homosexual ass arrested. He then thanks his friends for saving him by mercilessly murdering and raping them. He did create a pretty sweet kingdom though, so he did nothing wrong per say other than be a huge faggot.
- Casca: spends the first half of the manga being a bitch and sucking on Griffith’s titties for affection, and the other half as a Down syndrome patient that will put anything in her mouth, except Gut’s 10 inch Willy. At least she is one of the few black characters in anime/manga.
- Isidro: A runty, horny, fourteen year old, ginger that will stick is dick into anything with a vagina, including a fish. His only reason for joining the group is because he wants Guts senpai to notice him.
- Serpico: The pretty boy servant who may or may not want to stick his wiener into his sister. He keeps his eyes shut 24/7 to block out the haters.
- Schierke: loli witch girl that all the pedophilles want to fuck. Guts would have died like five times if it wasn’t for her ass. Berserk fans ship Guts and her because she is a Mary sue in the world of Berserk (as she is as powerful as Guts and not a useless dramatic twat) but she is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay underage (not that being a pedo ever stopped anyone in Berserk)
- Puck: Stupid ass fairy number 1. He started as a plot device to explain Guts surviving being on the bring of death every and coming back every major fight he has (as fairy dust is magical healing stuff) as well as give insight into Guts mind as fairy's have minor telepathy. Past Conviction Arc he is a chibi "comic" relief character who past his healing use is pointless.
- Ivalera: Stupid ass fairy number 2. See above and swap Guts for Schierke
- Farnese: Freaky catholic woman who plays the role of Casca’s special ed para. yes... she almost got raped by a horse. She eventually gets horny for Guts even though she has a chad navy badass she is engaged to who gave her his ship and crew just to please her. This is why you need to beat women so they learn their place gentlemen.
- Isma: Everyone on her home island hates her because her dad fucked a fish bitch, so she's super lonely and infected with GOTIS. Possibly the only wholesome character in the story. She feels no shame ever and takes off her clothes at the slightest possible excuse she can in front of anyone and feel no shame, probably because she is so desperate for people to like her. She would rather chill with her friends and almost get killed than reunite with her IRL mother who gave her Mermaid powers and saved her life.
- Rickert: Went from virgin mercenary 10 year old to chad manly blacksmith. Slapped Griffith because even though he admits it's a pretty sweet kingdom he made and he could see how Griffith did nothing wrong, he didn't appreciate the craftmanship he put into the sword tombstone graves he made for every member of the Band of the Hawk. Griffith sends demons to kill him cause Rickert knows too much, so Rickert agrees to convert to Islam and join a muslim rape gang for protection.
- Roderick: Navy lad that risks anything for a piece of Farnese’s catholic ass since he has an arranged marriage to her. He is a nice guy over all and is responsible for Berserk fans waiting 8 years for Guts to get off of a boat.
Berserk 1997 Anime & 2012 Golden Age Arc Movies
While an overall better adaption of the manga compared to the nightmare born from 2016/2017, blatant problems have still arised from either the lack of effort from the producers, or lack of money. When you can’t even afford to give an anime a proper ending, instead ending with Guts get his eye ripped out, you probably shouldn’t have adapted it. But what has haunted Berserk fans for years was the horrid opening theme “Tell me why” by Penpals. The notorious engrish and shitty guitar skills from the theme are a constant reminder that our lives will amount to nothing. 2012 had 3 movies that covered the golden age arc that were more action packed and relied less on anime stills for action, but peoples feelings on this are mixed. Animation in some parts is trash but amazing in other parts, Guts mercenary past is glossed over hard, the love story between Donavan and Guts is glossed over, glossed over Griffiths gay sex, certain characters are cut out. Best way to put it is if you are a Game of Thrones normie you will love this trilogy and get into Berserk from watching this and most of the cuts are made to keep it from becoming generic anime sword hero the movie for weeaboos only. If you liked the manga, you will hate it because you are an unpleasable faggot.
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2016/2017 Anime
The Berserk anime is known for its QUALITY animation, the bemusing result of its attempt to combine 3D and 2D animation, CGI, and cell-shading. The animators were so embarrassed with the (un)finished product that they redid some scenes for the Blu-Ray release.
Pretty much everyone and their dogs can tell you to avoid this adaption like the plague. It’s for the good of humanity. At least we got to watch old Farnie get tongue fucked by a horse in 3D.
Video Games
Sword of the Berserk: Guts' Rage: 1999 Dreamcast
A shitty Shenmue rip off with hack and slash shit gameplay that we got in the US, and was vaguely named so normies would buy it. If you have not read up to a certain point in the comic the game makes no fucking sense, and barely makes sense in context as its poorly written and poorly made. The game is cannon because Kentaro Miura wrote the script and has original plots in it. The TL;DR is Guts meets some faggy town infected by demon plant spores and King Ballsack gets Guts to kill a tree and steal its heart to make medicine that will un-retard Casca. Plant people try and say that they are happy being demon plant reatrds, then they try and kill everyone. Guts gets plant heart anyways, but turns out Ballsack lied the whole time! He wanted the demon plant heart to create Super Sayan demon army. Guts kills everything, the demon plant uses Casca to become super sayan. Guts kills demon plant and saves Casca and learns the magic medicine works on Casca and makes her un-potato for a minute, before she goes back to being a retard again. Turns out the plant makes crazy people sane and sane people crazy, but Guts killed all of the plants so he can't un-retard Casca anymore.
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Berserk: Millennium Falcon Hen Seima Senki no Shō: 2004 PS2
A good game we never got in the US and never will.
Dark Souls/Bloodborne
Because Berserk is old as fuck, it's inspired a lot of stuff. Dark souls seems to have drawn a lot of inspiration from Berserk, but given that Berserk started the whole generic edgy anime swordsman thing it could of came from anything. Berserk fans freak out and pretty much suck Dark Souls cock because it's totally the unofficial Dark Souls game that isn't total shit.
2017 Video Game: Berserk and the Band of the Hawk
In February 2017, KOEI Tecmo release another shitty Musou type of game under the Berserk franchise titled Berserk and the Band of the Hawk. Unlike all the other Musou ripoffs, this one kept the elements of what Berserk is. Wait until the price greatly drops if you're into Musou games. For now it's only worth renting it.
The Memes
Rape Horse
Based off the iconic scene where, everyone's favorite freaky bitch, Farnese proves herself to be useful by almost getting raped by a demon horse.
That Thing Was Too Big to Be Called a Sword
That Thing Was Too Big to Be Called a Sword is a lulzy quote/expression that came Guts large sword. It was Too Big,too and too rough
Griffith did nothing wrong
It should be obvious Griffith did nothing wrong but many readers seem to be retards. Griffith took the men who swore to give their life for the dream of Griffith owning his own kingdom, and made good on that oath. Casca had been in love with Griffith for over a decade and Griffith FINALLY gave Casca a dicking so good she became retarded (all making sure never to break eye contact with Guts to let him know that he still truly loves Guts). He even allows Guts and Casca to escape and squirted a baby into Casca that protects her from demons. Griffith also gave Guts a dream to live for even if that dream is only to kill Griffith. Griffith ain't even phased by Guts wanting to kill him and totally would make Guts his "fagboy" again if Guts stopped being mad about being a cuck. He even gave the Demons in the Eclipse the best party they have ever had. Griffith not only gave everyone what they wanted, but found a way to help and please everyone. It ain't his fault people are butthurt sensitive crybabies.
Stick I found at the park
The only thing more badass then an a one eyed swordsman wielding a sword larger then Chris-chan's fat rolls is an eight year old boy playing with a stick. Some reason a fan thought that would be a good idea, at least he thanked his mom for taking him.
Clang
Over used sound effect in the comic. Berserks faggoty fanbase thinks any manga that overuses this sound effect is ripping off Berserk because Berserk is the original OC please do not steal of every anime trope.
IdolMaster addiction is why Berserk goes on Hiatus
Kentaro Miura is a lazy fuck who bearely cranks out a single chapter a year or does interviews. People searched high and low for a reason there were so many Hiatuses, and turned to some of the few interviews he's done. He mentioned in a single interview that he is a big fan of the IdolMaster series and even bought an Xbox 360 just to play the games. While the fact he is playing a game about underage girls dancing to american idol garbage would raise eyebrows in the Jewnited States of Americunts, obsessing over 2D jailbait is a national pass time in Japan. What was weird is that Miura bought an Xbox 360, a system that Japan hates because it is a rival to the overpriced techno-Fischer-Price toys they sell to round eyes. Miura also mentioned in the past he's suffered video game addiction before. Berserk fans being the insufferable autists they are went and compared the time line of releases and saw the more IdolMaster games released, the longer Berserk hiatuses became. While some may argue other reasons like mental/physical health, working on other projects that release inbetween his hiatuses because he doesn't wanna just do Berserk, or spending so much time creating each detailed panel that it just takes forever so deal with it + not knowing himself where the story will go = long release times, all TRUE AND HONEST Berserk fans will tell you that their weeb lord and savior is too busy jacking off to underage girls to make their edgy hardcore drawn stories for them to jack off too.
Dark Souls is Berserk
The creators of Dark Souls have already said only 2 or 3 things in the game are directly inspired by Berserk and everything else is generic horror/fantasy stuff, but leave it to insufferable Berserk fan boys to claim that everything is a rip off of Berserk because no one else could possibly come up with thinking of combining horror and fantasy on their own.
Trolling Berserk fans/non-Berserk fans
Berserk fans do not get trolled by normal things that would piss off most fandoms as they are all edgy and 2deep4u faggots. They themselves started jokes about how Griffith and Donovan did nothing wrong. However, Berserk faggots are not immune from being trolled and because of how Autistic the Berserk fanbase is it's not hard to troll non-Berserk people with Berserk stuff.
Trolling Berserk fans
- Say Berserk is ripping off anything. Berserk fans consider Berserk the original OC DO NOT STEAL and rage at plagiarism accusations.
- Compare Berserk to Game of Thrones
- Say the 90's anime is dated trash that is boring and didn't hold up back then, the Golden Age movies did a better job and didn't look like trash, and the 2016 anime series is amazing.
- Mention that Miura needs to take his time making Berserk and should take a break before straining himself to write a new chapter.
- Remind them that Berserk is not planned out and Miura shits out chapters on the fly so any speculation of what will happen is pointless
- Say the Golden Age Arc was kinda TL;DR and boring so you skipped it to get to the good stuff.
- Say lost Chapter 83 is cannon
- Say lost Chapter 83 is not cannon
- Say Miura did a shit job writing the Dreamcast game and blame him for how bad it was
- Say Darksouls (or any other anime/video game) took nothing from Berserk and that Berserk relies on such generic over arching themes that anyone could come up with half the garbage in Berserk on their own
- Spoil parts of the story
- Say Goblin Slayer or Re:Zero (or any other edgy anime) is a modern day Berserk and in some ways better than Berserk
- Confuse the Black Swordsman of Sword Art Online with Guts
- Say that you thought the story is too simplistic so you moved on to something better
Trolling Cosplayers
- Spam the replies with Griffin/ Rape Horse
Trolling non-Berserk fans
- Say that whatever they like is drawing inspiration from Berserk without crediting Miura then give a TL;DR presentation how
- Talk about Berserk to people who don't care and never read it
- Meme Berserk memes at people who have no clue WTF you are talking about
- Say that the Mango is so much better than the Animu
- Talk about how deep and complex the story is
See also
- Epic Sword Guy
- Final Fantasy VII
- Final Fantasy VIII
- Ya know what, just put down every Final Fantasy for having at least 1 Guts clone
- Sword Art Online
- Bleach
- Ya know what, just put down every Animu with a giant sword wielding faggot
- the official Berserk subreddit. Serious posts only please.
- the silly Berserk meme subreddit shit post to your hearts content!
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